A/N: This part covers pre-Begins and during Begins. I wanted to establish Maddie's character and her relationships with Bruce, Rachel, and Alfred. Next one will do the same, but will go deeper into Begins. I'll get into TDK soon, promise. Please Read/Review! I'd love to know what you guys think.
--
The sadness Bruce felt at the funeral was deafening. Like a knife in his heart. Watching his parents' coffins be lowered into the ground was an image that would never disappear from his young mind. He looked down as a hand intertwined with his. He knew who it was without looking up. Slightly smaller than his own covered in a wool glove. Rachel Dawes. His best friend. His only friend, really. None of the other children ever gave him much attention. But she was different. Loyal.
Afterwards, they ended up sitting in the garden, watching the adults talk amongst themselves. Alfred was keeping a safe distance, making sure all of the guests had a fresh drink in hand. Bruce didn't seem to want anyone within ten feet of him except for Rachel, who was beginning to feel like she was doing something wrong. He hadn't spoken in over five minutes and she was running out of things to do with her hands. Now, they were placed neatly in her lap, still.
And then, the silence was broken. "What should I tell Madolyn?" Bruce whispered. His voice was small and his eyes were on the floor. Rachel assumed he was addressing her since she was the only one around.
"She's only a baby, Bruce. Even if you did tell her, I don't think she'd understand." Rachel explained cautiously, feeling bad as soon as the words left her mouth. That wasn't the right answer, she thought. She had never been around a baby before Bruce's little sister. How would she know what the child was capable of understanding at the age of nine months?
He went silent again, burning holes through his shoes. "I have to take care of her now. I have to do what they would have done."
Rachel felt the sudden urge to hug him, but stopped herself mid-way. She didn't want to embarrass him in front of all of those people. Most boys their age were like that. She went for the next best thing and put her hand on top of his. "I'll help you and Alfred take care of her. Even if my Mother does find a new job. I'll come over to help. Every day if you want." The urgency in her own voice surprised Rachel. She had meant every word. There was no other place she'd rather be. Wayne Manor was like her second home.
Bruce only nodded in response, grateful for her promise, and for the first time, intertwined his hand with hers first. Rachel felt a smile form in the corners of her small mouth. She had always wanted a sister... and for Bruce Wayne to be the one to take her hand first.
That night, Bruce crept down the hall and into Madolyn's bedroom. He peeked over her crib. "You don't have to worry." Bruce whispered, careful not to wake the sleeping child. "Rachel said she'd help Alfred and I take care of you. She's really smart for a girl, I guess. I..." He tried to choose his words carefully.
"I'll always protect you. No matter what." Bruce finished. "I'll help you remember them too, so you'll never forget. I promise."
--
Every year on the same day, Alfred drove Bruce and Madolyn to their parents' grave. And every one of those years, Bruce was more and more angry. More and more quiet. His eyes had even changed.
When Bruce turned thirteen, he insisted on having a driver escort them to the grave site, deciding that it was too much of a burden for Alfred. He already had to drive them everywhere as it was. So much, in fact, that another driver had been hired in case of conflicting schedules. Besides, he never seemed to have a day off. Bruce couldn't remember a day when Alfred wasn't there.
--
After placing fresh flowers on the graves, Bruce would head over to the diner across the street with Maddie (a nickname that seemed to stick over the years) in tow. They would have the same thing every time. A shared plate of french fries and two milkshakes. Chocolate for him and Strawberry for her, because she was allergic to chocolate. They had all found that out the hard way.
"Bruce?" A nine-year-old Maddie asked, with questioning brown eyes. "Why are you always kissing Nina?"
Bruce had to cover his mouth with a napkin so he wouldn't spit his drink onto the table. He pondered the answer before he spoke, wanting to be as clear as possible so that they'd hopefully never have to talk about this again. The subject had been sneaking it's way into their little talks lately. He was sixteen after all and had had his share of girlfriends over the years. "Because she's my friend. You know that."
"Is she your girlfriend?" Maddie stared at him square in the eyes. There was no escape.
Bruce sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Yes. I guess you could say that. Why do you always want to know who my girlfriend is? You shouldn't be thinking about things like that. It's so silly."
Maddie crossed her arms over her chest and let out a small pout. She knew that always got to him. "But I want Rachel to be your girlfriend."
That was no surprise. Maddie had always favored Rachel over Bruce's conquests. And yes, that's what they all were to him. Conquests. He had never taken any of them seriously. To even call them his "girlfriends" was alien to him. He didn't think of them that way. Of course, he treated them well like any guy should, and referred to them to the people who asked as his girlfriend, but there was never any connection there. Not like with Rachel, anyway.
But she was only a friend, and besides, he knew everything about her. They told each other everything. Even the things he didn't want to know about. She had never had many girl friends. Though lately, their relationship had changed. When she would tell him about the latest jerk that was on the verge of breaking her heart, yet again, he would feel jealousy rise in the pit of his stomach, which he could never understand. If Rachel would never see him as more than a friend, then why should he? Then he would be the one with the broken heart. No, he wouldn't do anything about his unrequited love for Rachel Dawes. His best friend since childhood. He would the bury the feelings and suffer in silence with other girls who would never be as authentic, as intelligent, as kind, or as beautiful as she was.
Yeah, life was fair.
"Bruce?!" Maddie called, bringing him out of his deep thought. "Have you been listening to anything I've been saying?"
Bruce nodded quickly, finishing up the last of the fries. "Of course. You were saying... Rachel... I should be going out with Rachel... which will never happen by the way. We're just friends. Something you also know."
"But you didn't hear why," Maddie explained, excitedly tugging at his sleeve. "It's just like in Cinderella. Rachel's like her. She's poor and she's..."
"Rachel's not poor." Bruce corrected. "She's just not as fortunate as we are."
She thinks for a moment. "Maybe one day a fairy godmother will come and make Rachel a real princess. Then you can marry her and she can be my real sister. We can all live at the manor with Alfred forever."
He gently took her hand and looked into her eyes. She seemed so convinced that this was all going to happen. That it could happen. "Maddie, those kinds of things only happen in your books. It's only a fairytale. Rachel and I, we'll be friends for the rest of our lives, I'm sure of that. But she doesn't love me. Not like that."
"But you do love her. If you didn't you wouldn't have that sad look on your face every time she leaves. Isn't that what people do when they love each other?"
"It's... one of the things. But that can mean a lot of things. You get sad every time I leave for a weekend in the country because you know I won't be back for a few days, right?" Bruce asked her.
She just nodded, still unconvinced.
He noticed in that moment that she could see right through him. She knew that he had always been in love with Rachel. He wished he could spare his sister the heartache and educate her on the cruelties of the world. Tell her that not all people were good. That things happen that can't be undone. That people lie, cheat, and steal to get what they want. That there might not be such a thing as true love, and if there was, he would never know, because the one person he does love doesn't love him back. That eventually everyone died alone, if they were unlucky enough, which most were. He had experienced all of these things first hand, and wished that this innocent little girl sitting in front of him, staring up at him wanting answers that he couldn't give, would never have to.
But that was inevitable.
--
The next year, Bruce was accepted into Princeton. Maddie was heartbroken when he and Alfred broke the news to her. Alfred explained that he owed it to himself to go. It was one of the best schools in the country. He would get a marvelous education and do all sorts of exciting things. Bruce said nothing. She decided that it would be easier to mark every day on her calendar, so that she could keep track of exactly how many days it would be before he left. She might miss it and he could forget to say goodbye. That wasn't something she was willing to risk.
Every one of those nights, she would cry herself to sleep. The thought of Bruce leaving was killing her. She was going to be abandoned by another person she loved. Who was next? Alfred? Rachel? She didn't have anyone else. Who would take care of her? Bruce showed up in the bedroom to calm her when she was borderline hysterical. He would stay until she fell asleep, after assuring her that he would visit and call as often as he could. He wouldn't be gone forever. It was only four years.
"Why can't you stay here?"
"Because, I just... I have to go. I have to go to school. Same as you." Bruce tried to explain, while stroking her hair. That was one of the many lame excuses he had given her over the past two weeks. He hated being the reason for her crying. She had no idea that he was hurting just as much, if not more, than she was.
But he had to go. He had to leave Gotham, at least for awhile. The manor was beginning to close in around him. Eventually it would crush him to the very core and he would become someone he didn't recognize anymore. That wouldn't do anyone any good. Maybe the anger and guilt would decrease over time. Maybe he would come back a changed man. A better man.
On his last night at home, Bruce walked into Maddie's room, prepared to comfort her one last time. But to his surprise, she was completely calm and tear-free, reading peacefully in bed. He walked over and sat on the edge, next to her, waiting. She didn't acknowledge him. Maddie had decided to ignore him if he were to come in to tell her goodnight, but the plan wasn't working like she had expected. She thought he would get the message, give up, and just leave. But he was just sitting there, staring at her absently. "I heard that Rachel came over today. Did you two play Monopoly or cards this time?"
"Monopoly. She let me win." Maddie answered, still not looking at him.
Bruce chuckled and removed a box from his pocket. "I don't know about that. You've beat me quite a few times. I never let you win."
"Yeah, right." she replied sarcastically, looking down at the present. "What's that?"
Bruce opened it and held up two necklaces. Each had a charm shaped like a half circle dangling from it. He placed one of them around her neck. She examined it admiringly. She never wore any jewelery, mostly so that the other kids wouldn't know just how wealthy her family was, but the necklace was simple. Elegant. "Isn't it supposed to be half of a heart?"
"It can be, but this ones not. It's very special. I saw it and thought of you." He pointed to the half moon outside of her window. "You were always looking at the moon when you were little. You wouldn't say anything, just stare at it for hours. That's what it reminded me of. Now when I'm gone, and you miss me, all you have to do is look at the necklace, and know that I'm somewhere else with the other half, doing the same."
Maddie hugged Bruce tightly, not wanting to let go. It was the best present she'd ever received. And that was including the jungle gym Alfred had built on the grounds when she was six.
"We're joined forever, Maddie. For life. I will always come back for you." Bruce promised her.
She sniffled and pushed some of the damp hair out of her face. Trying her very best not to cry. "I know."
--
The next morning, he was gone. The goodbye's were short and sweet. Bruce didn't want to upset Alfred or Maddie anymore than they already were. Alfred clasped her hand as the town car pulled out of the drive, and as soon as it was there, it wasn't anymore.
Alfred was sad. Maddie always knew when he was sad. He had an unmistakable expression that showed on his entire face. But he certainly didn't let it slow him down. "What about a nice cup of hot tea, Miss Madolyn? I think we could both use one."
Maddie nodded and followed him inside, after glancing back at the tire tracks one last time.
"Tonight you can choose the menu. Anything you like." Alfred told her as they headed into the kitchen.
This excited Maddie. She never got to choose the entire menu. Her mind drew a blank until she decided on the obvious choice. "French fries and strawberry milkshakes?" She says, as more of a question than a statement.
"So be it."
Maddie hopped off of the stool and ran into the other room to call and invite Rachel.
"Don't run, Miss Madolyn!" Alfred called after her.
--
Over the next year or so, Bruce would come home from school two weekends a month on the train. Though, Alfred would be a ball of nervous energy every Friday, worrying about the dangers of the public transportation system. But the two weekends a month soon were replaced by only one. Then the visits stopped altogether, and became long phone calls. And then, nothing at all. Bruce had blamed his studies but Maddie knew that couldn't be true. Her brother had never really been interested in anything. He had always excelled in academics, yes, but he never had any real passion for any of it. It all came too easily to him.
Those two years Bruce was at Princeton were two of the hardest for Maddie. Years she would never want to re-live later in life for anything in the world. Sure, she had Alfred. He would talk to her for hours on end about any subject she wished, but she always felt as if she was keeping him from his other duties. She only really watched him work once, but never again. She felt so badly watching him do all of that work by himself, that all she wanted to do was help. Alfred wasn't exactly getting any younger. But she knew better. All he would do is tell her to go and play or do something else girls her age should be doing.
For some reason or another, Maddie never did those things. Her shyness had made it increasingly difficult to make and keep friends. She had a few at school but they never came to the Manor to play. They were too mesmerized by the fact that she lived in a mansion. Intimidated. Though, she had never bragged. She wasn't particularly proud of her living situation and secretly longed to live in a regular house like all of them. No. To be without the Wayne name would be enough. No one staring at you when you walk down the street, whispering "Isn't that her? What a lovely looking little girl. Such a shame what happened. They were such good people."
No, she didn't appreciate those people at all. They had no idea what it was like. It must be nice being on the outside looking in.
--
Bruce finally returned to Wayne Manor the night before Joe Chill's parole hearing. It was almost midnight when the black town car rolled onto the gravel drive. The headlights across the bedroom wall made Maddie wake up and peer out of the window. Bruce was standing, staring at the mansion, like he had never seen it before. She was confused as to why he looked like that, but figured it had something to do with their parents. Everything always came back to them with Bruce.
Maddie's eyes squeezed shut. She didn't want to think about. She had tried to avoid it, but it was impossible. She imagined what it must have been like staring at the man holding a gun on them. Watching as he inched closer, pulled the trigger, and finally watching them with agony as they died on the street. For nothing. For money and jewels. How senseless was that? She had never known her father, but from what she had been told, he would have given everything he had to the man had he of just asked. Why did he have to kill them? And why did he leave Bruce there to pick up the pieces? Something he was still doing to this day.
It was a feeling that she could never understand and that killed her. She wanted to feel what Bruce felt. To have known them, to have loved them, like he did. Instead, she had boxes of family photographs. Not many from after she was born, but several from the years before. That was all she knew of them.
Joe Chill. The name made her skin crawl. Of course, the only reason she knew the name of the man that killed her parents was because of a newspaper article that was left out in the kitchen one morning when she was ten. She stared at it for awhile, confused, not knowing quite how to feel about it. She guessed that was a good thing.
Maddie was brought out of her thoughts when a car door slammed. Bruce was staying in a hotel again. He never liked to be there at night.
--
The next morning, Bruce and Rachel were talking in the study, and Maddie was trying her damnedest to hear them through the door. She could only make out then why is your boss letting him go... testifying... and Carmine Falcone, whoever that was. She wanted to know more about the hearing, but no one was telling her anything. Least of all Alfred. He was a lost cause.
As she leaned closer, the door suddenly opened, and Bruce was standing in front of her. Not because she was listening. He had known she was there all along. So much for eavesdropping. He took her hand and they walked out to the garden.
"I want to come with you. Why won't you let me?" Maddie argued, seated alongside Bruce on a bench.
Bruce shook his head. "It's out of the question. You don't need to see any of this. I'll be there for the both of us."
"It's not fair." Maddie shouted, staring up at him. She couldn't remember when she had ever been more angry with him. They were her parents too. What gave him the right to deny her this one thing? She took a breath, calmer now. "I want to see him. Bruce, I have to see him. Please. You'll be there too. I won't be alone."
Bruce could feel tears welling up in his eyes. Anger bubbling to the surface. He could feel the steel from the gun against his leg. There was no going back. He couldn't let this pass. "No. This is my fight... not yours. I won't let it be." He pulled her close to him and could feel her tears staining his sweater. "It'll all be over soon."
--
Bruce never came back from the hearing. Where was he? What happened? A million scenarios rushed through Maddie's imagination. What if he was lost? What if the driver had left him at the courthouse, he couldn't get back home, and was stuck in the Narrows on foot? What if he were mugged or someone had hurt him? She didn't want to think any of the thoughts, but she couldn't help herself.
Where was he? Why hadn't he called?
After hours of debating with herself, Alfred led her away from the picture window and assured her that Bruce was fine. He just needed some time to himself.
She wasn't convinced.
--
Joe Chill was dead. The morning paper had confirmed it and it was all over the news. Before quickly scanning the pages of the Gotham Times for more information, Maddie had assumed Bruce had been the one to do it. She just hoped he had gotten away it. He would never last in prison. Then... The Falcone crime family had been accused and were currently under investigation.
"Rachel, what if something's happened to him?"
Rachel held Maddie as she cried on her shoulder, with a guilty look on her face. Why did she look guilty? Maddie thought. She hadn't done anything.
--