Duality

By. Panda-chan.

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Summary: Being branded as a tool was okay, right? Even though deep inside you knew it wasn't true—it made more sense than reality. Maybe he was right—I was a killing machine. -Angst-

-Standard Disclaimer Applies-

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Women is a miracle of divine contradiction.
-6-

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Tenten was never the girl every one else thought she was.

Her outside mask consisted of a caring smile and a selfless, motherly attitude to which a person would deduct would risk her life to save that of another. Her smile would light up even the most saddened person and her ardent hazel nut eyes were a delight to all, her words were wise and her intentions were always good. The way she handled weapons could be considered full of passion and she felt for every unfortunate person who had been punctured by her razor-sharp arsenal of knives.

But in actuality, she wasn't. Passed the facade, passed the endless lines that made up her adorable smile and passed the light that enthralled even the most cryptic mind lied a woman who knew what she was doing. She knew exactly what emotion to express and what to say at appropriate times—she had enough practice. Her weapons were sharp, clear and wiped of blood because they needed to be in order to kill properly. She pressed them into her victims because they needed to be killed—as an assignment directed by her superior. She smiled; she was a woman, it was what they did best. She laughed; it helped clear the suspicion of anything that would taint her reputation as caring but lethal.

She was truly a contradiction to what everyone else thought of her.

Her kind and unburdened smile was crushed at the age of sixteen. When she accepted a semi-solo mission to the village of Sound just a week after her birthday, Neji accompanying her out of boredom. By that time, rumors had been flying about of the return of Naruto and she tried her best to complete the mission without faults, but just in time to see the bright-spirited man walk through the gates of Konoha.

It was then that she had been taught the true meaning of being a Shinobi.

... I panted, my breaths coming strong and thick as I ran through the white blanket of fog which shrouded my eyes. I was almost there; I could faintly see the outlines of the estate. I tried my best to forget my missions due date—which had been yesterday at mid-day—and concentrated on the large looming mansion which seemed distant in the near-rising sun.

'Just a few more yards...' I thought as I leaped over one of the several large boulders in my way. 'And then I'll kill him and report back to Neji.' I stopped, reaching the grandly intricately wired gate. As I regulated my breath the way Neji had taught me, I began to make intrusion plans—it was, my assignment to infiltrate and eliminate Hiroshi of the Yagami clan.

I decided to go in through the back. I sprinted all around the estate until I was in the back; the place they would most likely be expecting me. And as I leaped over the wooden barricade, I let a smirk rise to my face. I was right. The area was riddled with guards. No one would expect someone to actually go through the most ninja-infested place; it was just insanity to do so.

But it was just insane enough to work to my advantage.

I skulked through the darkness, not letting a hint of light touch me. As I slowly made my way to one of the many stairwells, I let my eyes gaze wonder to the two guards quietly whispering to each other. They nodded at one another, then went opposite ways. My eyes fell onto the large gap of emptiness that was left behind; no one looked remotely on guard. This gave me an insight; there had not been any attempts of break-in in this estate.

'Pity', I thought. 'I like challenges.' I made my way up the stairwell, looking over my shoulder, and entered. Inside, on the wall's, there hung portraits. The floor was furnished red and the wood was sharply refined. I silently made my way through the empty corridor, stopping at times to admire the furniture or paintings.

"The Young Master asks us to get it for him... What was it? A special Katana, I think." I stopped, frozen. I listened closely, someone was coming—fast. I looked around me quickly, there was no place to hide! Everything was in the open and there were no shadows big enough for my body to blend in with.

I backed up, and then ran the way I first came from, cursing my foolishness along the way. I swerved the corner and looked up. There was no other option; they were nearing me. I leaped up and grasped onto the ceiling with chakra-powered palms. I held my breath.

"No. I don't know." The two men passed below me, in their hands candles to light their path.

"How could you not know? Well, the Young Master ordered it and I presume what he asks is not too hard to find..."

"But, I haven't heard of it... That sword..." They rounded the corner and I droned out their musing with the thrumming of my heart. I was shaken. They were the two guards I saw before, standing by the pond. At least I thought they were guards, now they looked more like the Advisors of the man.

I silently leaped down and closed my eyes, listening. Waiting for the right moment to start over. I heard no one, they were all too far to even hear me. I wasted no time. I ran down the hall, the soft padding of my feet across the furnished floor, I noted, was too loud to be considered stealthy.

But I made it. The mans room. Complete with his name engraved into the oak finish of the door. I smirked and slid the door open, knowing well enough that there was two more rooms inside; the bedroom and the private bath room, just as it was printed in the blue-prints me and Neji had revised over. I stepped inside, and walked towards the room to the right, my hand already reaching my pouch strapped onto my thigh.

I stood at the threshold of the door, watching the gorgeous man that lay on the bed sleep softly and worry-free. I let a small laughter pass me. Gorgeous? He might be handsome, but it doesn't compare to Ne—

"...TENTEN! COME IN!"

My hand flew to my neck and my breathing stopped for a second. The man lying the bed shot up with a large object in his hand, awakened by the loud, static voice. His obsidian eyes darted to me and I saw him take a sharp intake of breath, gripping the object in his hand tightly. I swore into the device strapped to my neck and sprung forward.

I pinned him to the bed and slapped a hand over his mouth, "Be still!" I hissed, staring into his shocked eyes. I pressed the button on my neck and spoke, "I'm busy right now, sorry Nej, over." I switched the volume off and focused on the man under me, my hand prying his own open in order to make him drop the weapon in his hand.

It clattered to the floor.

Large obsidian eyes. Spiked, long light brown hair. Sharp, pointed facial structure... it was him. I slipped out my knife from my sleeve and pressed it to his neck, getting ready to finish the job. I was so close too.

My hand, by now, was looser over his mouth, and I heard him ask a bit muffled. "Are you going to kill me?"

I resisted the urge to blink at the stupidity of the question. "Yes. Yes, I am."

His eyes were filled with disdain, there was no fear at all. It shocked my how calm he could be under such circumstances. "You Shinobi are all the same. It really does sicken me..."

I narrowed my eyes, "Oh, why is that?"

"You kill, that is all you're useful for. Killing machines—such a waste of youth," He smirked. "You follow orders and do as you are told. You have no conscious whatsoever; a simple robot designed to kill. You're monsters, that what you are. Killing, murdering... murderer's. Simple, plain murderer's!"

I frowned at him. "We are not murderer's! We do our job with honor and—"

"—Pride? Is that your excuse?" He sneered. "That is nothing! Any person who is capable of killing is a monster who should be damned to the deep, burning core of Hell!" He spat into my face. I was too enraged to do anything more than glare. "You are going to kill me now... slash my throat and let me bleed. You're going to jump off me and watch me until my lungs stop accepting air. Isn't that being a sadistic monster? A demon? I know you are not going to give a quick and painless death—there is no painless death, girl!"

"Shut up, you know nothing!" I yelled a bit louder. He didn't know what he was talking about... He was stalling, was all. Maybe the nerves of near-death were getting to him.

He ignored me. "Aren't you ashamed of what you are? Do you even know why I should die? Do you? Huh?"

I stared with my eyes wide. I didn't. Not exactly. "You... You ran a large drug ring and ran from the authorities!"

"Wouldn't you, if you were caught for something you didn't do?." He chuckled bitterly. My eyes widened. "And yet here you are, ready to kill me. And you will always hold this sin in your soul—it will be burned into you for all eternity." His voice grew colder, icier. "You just cause terror amongst the villagers. Don't you hear the whispers? The looks, the way they treat you differently?" I felt my eyes sting. I have. " A tool. A tool used for the elimination of people, places, things that are a burden to your superior. A tool—a weapon like that in your hand. It does whatever the person a hold of it asks... that is what you are..."

He smiled crookedly."Have you accepted that yet?"

I started to shake. I thinned my lips and didn't let the tears fall from my eyes as his words sunk into my heart. I didn't want to admit it. It wasn't true, I repeated, he's trying to detour me from my objective.

As if reading my mind, he smile morphed into a smirk. And my fury tore free. "I am not trying to divert you from your objective; it's just the truth you aren't willing to accept. Shame, shame."

"Enough!" As I flashed to the wall and slammed him onto it, hearing the bones in his body slowly start to shatter, I began to loose the vice on my emotions and I stared into his accusing eyes. I've never felt this way before... never felt this guilty or agonized by my victims final words. They were usually pleas, or swears. Never words of meaning.

Blood trickled down the side of his lip, I concentrated on that as I squeezed his neck. He shuttered in a breath, hacking out more blood. I felt my heart clench tightly at his helpless form.

"...You were a tool..." He strained, sucking in a shuttering breath.

I looked up into his eyes shakily, my lip twitching as my eyes filled with tears again. He was not merciful. He watched as a tear slid down my cheek. And then another.

"You are a tool. A simple, basic object that builds in—strength and used for selfish murder. Shinobi are all tools used for eliminating... the people your country who they... do not... need... or find threatening..." Another tear fell. His eyes grew amused. "You break apart families and... and tear away lives.... of some people who do not deserve such fate."

I tightened my grip and pressed my body on to his, my teeth clenched so tight my jaw hurt. I would not believe his words—no, they were lies. I helped the villagers have peace of mind, not give them nightmares. I helped my village—my country and those innocent against the villains that lurked in the shadows ready to attack the pure. I was not the evil one. I killed the evil people. Not the other way around.

I stared into this mans eyes and felt my life's meaning suddenly become dull and cracked. He grinned. "You are the villain. And by.. killing me... you will know—that you just... killed an innocent... man... with no mercy..."

I twisted my head down and shook it rapidly. I breathed out, "No.. I'm—I'm doing good! My village told me to kill you because you are a menace to society! You're a criminal who must be dead. You must... have done something wrong!"

He didn't stop grinning. "Am I... though?" I loosened my grip and finally let him drop to the floor as I backed away, trembling. He was... wasn't he? Wasn't he? The Hokage wouldn't make me kill him for no reason. He wouldn't—he isn't like that! He's a good man with a good soul; he wouldn't do such a vile act!

He coughed and hacked. Running a hand under his mouth to take care of blood dried on. He looked up at me, and his eyes were filled with amusement and contempt. "Tenten. Tenten, do you have parents?"

I shook my head after a few minutes of comprehension.

"How did they die? Do you know...?"

I opened my mouth to respond, and it all came to me in a flash of realization, pain and guilt. I felt his gaze on my expression and as my lips quivered. My hands wrapped around my shoulders as I began to drone out all possible sound. But I heard him whisper: "You became the very thing that killed you and your family... and yet you do not feel an ounce of pain? You must really be a monster."

My control broke.

"SHUT UP!!" I threw the knife in my hand with all my might and with deadly accuracy at his head, my teeth clenched openly, and my eyes wet with moister.

I ran. I ran out of the room, stumbling over my feet and sliding over my palm and running down the way I came from with the urge to go back and slam my fist into his face repeatedly. And maybe I should, it was my mission to—

"A tool—a weapon like that in your hand. It does whatever the person a hold of it asks..."

I bit down a cry as I ran out and jumped over the sturdy, wooden fence, disregarding all the shouts of alarm I could hear coming from behind me. I panted as I reached the edge of the forest and gripped the communication device on my neck, closing my eyes as I leaped from a branch and slammed my body onto the rough bark of the tree.

I gripped it, breathing into it as I trembled. I dug my fingers in it. My parents. It was still a sore subject. They died in front of my eyes and it hurt to remember. He was absolutely right, though. I don't know how he found out, but he was right. He was right. He was right.

He was right.

My parents... my mother and my father... my sister and my brother... they died upon the hands of Shinobi. Good, selfless, peace-making Shinobi. I remembered the times I used to chirp that I will become a great Ninja. My brother would snort, my sister would cheer.

I closed my eyes and suppressed my mournful sobs.

My parents supported my life's decision. They smiled and gleefully said that I would become a good Shinobi; to help those in need and bring justice to all who need it. And as bitter pain gripped the edges of my heart, I heard someone near me. I stifled a sob; it was the very next day, when I was only seven, that they had been murdered for the good of the village. Something happened and I was too naïve and childish to understand.

I never knew the reason. No one dared to tell me. Another sob raked through me.

I cried out a small, pitched, cry of agony and pressed myself harder onto the moist bark of the tree; shivering against the incessant cold and undiluted pain in my chest. My vice grip was beginning to strain my muscles—they ached with objection.

"Tenten?" Someone put a hand over my shoulder. I controlled my breathing and gulped down the next throe of pain. I shifted my eyes, I couldn't advert my thoughts to something else—it was too truthful to put out so pathetically.

"Neji..."

He looked sincerely worried. I've never been one to suddenly cry. He pried me off the tree and gently sat me down on the thick branch. Kneeling, he stared into my pain laced eyes, furrowing his brows and asking, "Tenten, what happened in there? Are you injured?"

I disregarding his question. I substituted it with my own stupid, painfully-obvious one. "Am I a monster, Neji?"

His face flashed with surprise before it went back to it's stone-like mask. How I envied his mask. So perfect, so sterile. "No. No, you're not Tenten. You're not a monster... why do you ask? Did he tell you that?"

We didn't utter any words after that. I stared into his clear, pearl eyes and he seemed to understand the pain I was going through. His brows drew in and a deep scowl adorned his handsome face, his fingers dug into my shoulder as he held me straight. A stray thought passed through my mind, 'He would look better... with a smile on.' I disregarded the thought soon after—it was pathetic to be thinking that way.

"Tenten... what did he tell you exactly?" His voice was calm, but I sensed an undercurrent of rage beneath his otherwise innocent question.

I didn't answer. This wasn't his problem.

"Tenten."

I flinched. He was angrier now, I could start to see his brow incline in pure irritation and annoyance.

I dropped my head into his shoulder, feeling him stiffen, and shut my eyes as the moister from them seeped into his clad white shirt. "Okay."

He rested an arm on my back, and whispered some comforting words but they did no good. The damage was done. I was a monster. I am a monster. And the worst part was, as I brought my chin up to set on his firmly built shoulder and started into the rolling dark, I still wanted to go back and finish my assassination job despite the searing pain that griped my body.

.x.

"Pick your stuff, boys, it's time to go home!" She shouted, smiling crookedly with her traveling pack hanging by her hip. She changed her ripped and bloodied oriental shirt from a previous battle into one of her newer ones—one with the Hyuuga emblem proudly stamped onto her back.

I quickly wrapped up the spar I was having with Lee, who was about ready to deliver his final blow. He stopped in mid-hit, my arms held out defensively.

"Is it late already, Tenten?!" He shouted gleefully, despite being disappointed. I saw her nod, a small smile gracing her lips.

"Yup, and it's time to go—we're going to be late for the inauguration of the Sixth Hokage. Naruto's time to shine."

I straightened and watched Lee bounce off into the tree tops with a large smile. My gaze fell back to Tenten, who was staring at me expectingly.

"Well? Time to go, Neji." She turned and prepared to leap into the tree's just like Lee had done, but I stopped her. I didn't have to call or shout out, nor did I have to move a muscle. I just stared at her. I knew she felt my stare for she stopped and turned back at me.

"... What is it, Neji?" She closed in on me, shortening the distance between us. "Is something wrong?" I felt her chakra spike, and let my lips curve despite the severity of the situation. I had to know. I could not put it off much longer—it has always bothered me up until this very day.

"Tenten... do you recall the event that took place a few years ago?" I started. She tilted her head to the side and rolled her eyes up.

"You've got to be a bit more clearer than that, Neji."

"When you took on the mission to Sound to eliminate the Prince who has been convicted of running the second biggest narcotic ring in the Fire country. He had escape his prison sentence and we were sent to either eliminate him or capture him. He fled from us and we had no other choice but to kill him."

I saw something I have never seen on her face before. The array of emotions that assaulted her face was surprising. Her expression halted to display the type of expression I would normally portray. Monotonous. Empty. Blank.

Despite the emptiness that she showed, she managed a shaky smile. "That mission. Of course I remember that mission. Why do you ask?"

I took a step closer to her, and to my shock she stepped back. We stayed silent for a moment, and I decided it would be best to keep a distance. "Something happened that night. It changed you."

She laughed—it sounded so faux, I doubt it would fool anyone but herself. "Changed me? What are you talking about, Neji? I have no clue—"

"Yes you do." I interrupted. The easy expression she masked to cover her true emotions faltered the slightest bit. Probably no one would have noticed—but I did. She couldn't fool me for long. I had always known something was a bit... off with her. Ever since that day.

Something happened and I wanted to know.

She started to grow agitated. I could feel it emitting from her. "Look, Neji, we're really going to be late—and I don't think it's polite to keep someone waiting!"

"You could care less if Naruto was becoming Hokage," Shock flooded her and she opened her mouth in objection. "I know you would—you've hinted it yourself. Stop using it as an excuse, Tenten. Stop evading the question."

"I am not evading the question."

"Tenten."

She crossed her arms. "What? I'm not. I told you, I have no clue what you're talking about."

I synchronized her actions. Her posture wasn't laid back nor calm as it usually was, it was stiff and held a defensive edge. Her confused mask was also tense and rigid—making it seem more worried than quizzical. Her muscles were tightened and ready to leap into action if necessary.

She wasn't going to give into me like she usually does. Though she and I might have a very deep and electrifying relationship—she still hasn't told me all of her secrets, though I've told her all of mine. I might know most, but I've only scratched the surface to what lies deep inside her soul.

I dropped the topic. She was mine until I said she wasn't. I had all the time in the world to figure out what she was hiding behind the mask she put forward everyday.

I jumped up without warning and stayed crouched on the branch I choose. "Come on, we're going to be late."

She stared at me, and then nodded and jumped onto the same branch as me. Immediately I noticed the difference. She looked more relaxed than before and I could see the familiar traces of sadness and lostness I've come to be accustomed too. She tapped my arm lightly and leaped onto the next branch.

I followed.

It went like that for several minutes. When we reached the edge of the forest and began to see civilization again was when something crossed my mind. She had asked me a very heart-wrenching question that night... something I haven't quite been able to understand until now. Whatever that man had told her affected her greatly, and I've slowly come to realize that perhaps he had told her something unmentionable.

Something that would make any proud and successful Shinobi fall.

As we both jumped down the branches in sync, I looked at the fragile expression of her face and said, "You're not a monster, Tenten. Anyone you ask would tell you that."

She stumbled and I grabbed her to steady her. "You are a Shinobi—the instant you choose this career path you should have known we would do barbaric things. It is part of the duty as a Ninja. This job is not for the weak-hearted, you should know that."

I couldn't see her face, it was being shrouded by her thick and vibrant hair. "I know that..."

I smiled down at her, though she couldn't see. "Whatever that man told you—he was wrong. As a Shinobi—you carry out the orders of your superior in order to bring peace to the community. In a way, you can be considered evil... but it is not possible if you consider how many lives you have avenged and how many families you brought peace of mind while doing these unspeakable acts of murder."

It was silent. But slowly she turned and wrapped her arms around my mid-section. I let her and I let my arm drape around her in response to her affectionate gesture.

"Thank you, Neji."

I frowned. I wasn't used to being so soft to her in public—I don't I had ever been that soft around her period. I took a step back and walked forward, ignoring the sudden rush of heat on my cheeks. "Let's go—we're going to be late."

"Yeah, okay Neji." I could hear the giggle in the sentence and though I didn't want too, it brought a small smile to my face. I could sense her uplift in mood. She passed me quickly and gracefully. I caught a glimpse of her face—it didn't hold the same type of sadness I had always seen. There was something else there now...

Peace? Love? Adoration? I couldn't place my finger on it—but it was better than what she had before. As we walked through Konoha's Main Gate and made our way to the center of town, where the inauguration was to begin, she slowed and slipped her hand into my own, smiling up at me with the same emotion I couldn't decipher.

"Thank you so much, Neji." She smiled wider, confusing me even more. "Thank you so, so much."

.x.

I've no clue how I derived that from the prompt. I'll just let you guys decide, and be grateful I didn't cut it like I was going too and leave you guys hanging from the italic part up. Sorry for the longitude of the shot—but I had nothing else and this prompt really had me on edge. For me, this was the hardest one to do. And if something is off, please tell me because I am dead-tired and don't know what I just did...

Time: 5: 02 am.

Review Please! I would appreciate it!

Panda.