I awoke at some ridiculous time in the morning; due to an intent smell of burning. Not a sensuous aroma, the type which you receive from a warm sumptuous log fire, but a sticky, sweaty burning, accompanied with a horrifically unpleasant tone, recognizably of burnt meat. I struggled to pull my head up from the pillow, leaning up on an elbow to peer out from the bed. Dong Zhuo stirred beside me, grunting loudly and rolling over to face me and his eyes opened slowly, to narrow slits.

'Chan.' A statement, gruff.

'Yes?'

He roughly gave me a shove so that I nearly toppled from the bed. I caught myself and collected myself before turning back to face him, my pursed smile concealing pure hatred. 'Yes my Lord?'

'Go see what that positively putrid smell is… and hurry up.'

Stepping gently from the bed, I nodded curtly and made to leave the room; noticing at once just how warm it had become; the atmosphere was parched, thirsty, whilst outside I was sure I could hear voices, frantic footsteps.

'I'll be waiting for you…' Zhuo growled just before I left the room, in a way which I assumed was meant to be seductive. Egh.

Stepping out into the corridor, that whiff of scorched meat returned and nearly knocked me over. It was disgusting, nauseating, and the heat out here was even more itense, in fact it was so vivid I could almost see the fires it conjured up in my mind…

But there was fire. It licked the beautiful panelled walls of the palace in an almost loving way; caressing them to destruction, singing their woes as the floorboards above me creaked in agony. For some reason, my reaction was to run down the corridor, towards the fire, where I knew my friends; the servants of this palace lived. Panic rose up in my chest as I realised that they would be in the bulk of the tragedy; accommodation with thatched roofs, rooms piled up nearly on top of each other in their proximity. I sprinted down the hall, ignoring the heat, which was blistering, searing it's way into my body, stinging my eyes as tears formed and leaked from within.

I could hear people running above me, around me, but could see no one. Where were they? Was anyone managing an escape? What was happening? Mindless thoughts such as this overwhelmed my brain, tickling my imagination as I pictured poor little Mei stuck in her room with no way out, screeching for help.

I had to find someone, anyone.

"Hello!' It came out in a croak; the heat had torched my throat, my lungs, I gasped for air as the fire intensified. Now I could hear screaming.

I screamed back, 'Hello? Anyone?' I was crying, running down this endless corridor which seemed to know no bounds; a hall which I had walked for the past few months without stopping to think of its relevance… now it was holding me prisoner, just as in a dream where you run and run and run, but you never reach your destination.

And suddenly, finally, I turned a corner, crashing into Lu Bu. We collapsed in a heap, he, holding me in his arms before he realised who I was. Viciously, he dragged me to my feet. His face was a mixture of emotion; anger, hate, pain…

'Diao Chan! You need to get out… now. I have to deal with Dong Zhuo. Go back this way, you can escape through the kitchens if you hurry… I will meet you when I have finished…'

'Finished? Finished what? What's going on? We have to help everyone, we have to get everyone out!'

'No, its over now, Diao Chan… I did this… I did this to rid the world of Dong Zhuo and his foul underlings…'

I was shocked into silence. My eyes widened and I nearly lost all control of my body as I felt a huge weight crash down on me. 'What?' I couldn't believe it.

'You… you set this fire?'

'Yes… it was my only chance! I have to kill him… now!' He struggled to push past me, although I conjured up strength unknown to me to push him back.

'Please Bu… he's unarmed… in his bed! You can't do that to him! It's not honourable! Don't do this… please…' I was crying, pleading, my hair dry from the fire, my face wet with tears, sweat mingling with perfume. Around us, I could hear screams intensifying, the crashing of beams, walls, the whole palace was being brought to its knees. That smell caught my attention again as I heard another painful cry from someone so close… and then I realised; it was the smell of burning flesh.

I let out a loud cry and grasped Lu Bu's shoulders in desperation… getting everyone out alive was so much more important than his silly adolescent conquest!

'Please… please Bu…' I was pleading, struggling, but it was making no difference. Lu Bu was set, and he shoved me aside as I collapsed on the floor once again, yelling at me to escape, he ran off down the corridor, clasping a sword, wiping sweat from his brow in indignation. I could not stop him now.

My energy had evaporated with just about every other liquid in this place. My throat was dry. On my knees, I watched, my vision blurred, as my new home came down around me. I attempted a shout, nothing came from within. I was empty of everything, my passion, my voice. Why? Because I was worthless. This whole escapade was of my doing. The horrific screams and desperate cries of those around me, those who I couldn't quite reach, were my doing. I deserved to die here much more than Dong Zhuo himself.

I made no attempt to move. It was over. I welcomed the heat, the caress of the flames against my skin. I could smell my hair, singed, burnt. My beauty was worth nothing if my honour and my loyalty was not intact. The heat was overpowering… I felt myself falling to the warm ground, welcoming the comfort after such weariness…

'Chan? Chan! What on earth are you doing? Get up! Get up!'

My knight in shining armour…?

The cold air hit me as I sat up from the fresh and dewy grass; a welcome contrast from the sweaty and heated adventures of just a few hours ago.

I had been asleep on the ground for quite some time. As I stood up and turned to look behind me, I saw the palace, still standing, but a shadow of its former self. Black and decayed, wooden timbers continued to fleck away and fall to the ground, the plot uninhabitable, eerie. Its grandeur had been lost. Behind the embers you could still see the palace grounds; extending for miles, smoking, not looking as glamorous without their fabulous companion. A huge number of us, I could see, were lying, stood, kneeling in prayer, and sleeping out in the courtyard, the fortified walls of which had withstood the arson. Zhang Liao was sat cross-legged on the floor beside me, gazing softly at my figure, looking drowsy and heart-broken. He had saved my life. I looked down upon him.

'Th-thankyou…' I stuttered, blinking away tears.

He said nothing, and looked away, shaking his head, returning to his solace.

I stumbled away, moving throughout the crowds. There were many who had survived, although in a community of hundreds, that was nothing. I smiled softly at familiar faces, pacing throughout the courtyard, not really sure who I was looking for. I trampled upon burnt bushes, feeling sorrow for those who huddled beside unmoving bodies, grieving over those who had passed.

'Diao Chan!' A hoarse little voice cried from somewhere in the mist; although I knew who it was from the tone, and relief flooded me.

'Mei!' I knelt down as the young daughter of Lu Bu rushed into my outstretched arms, and I breathed her in, running my fingers through knotted and ashen hair.

'Oh my goodness I'm so glad you are alright…'

'I was so scared… there was so much fire and it was hot and scary and…'

She continued to cry softly into my shoulder as I held her close, looking desperately over her shoulder to find her mother anywhere among the crowds.

'Mei…' I gently pulled her away from my embrace. 'Where is your mum?'

She sniffed a little and I wiped away a tear tenderly, smiling at her in reassurance.' I don't know…' she said timidly, 'I thought you would know where she is…'

I shook my head, worried, scouring the scene once again. All I could see were staggering figures among the grass, weeping and clutching hopelessly at any last personal relics they had rescued. I could not tell who they were; their faces were grey with ash, they all looked the same.

'Come on, we'll go and look for her, yes?'

So I took her podgy little hand and we walked on, through the survivors, a nervous thought gnawing away in my mind, desperately wishing for a positive result.

'Mei!' The second we were in view, Lady Lu abandoned all elegance and pegged it towards us, grasping her daughter up in her arms as soon as she was close enough. The little girl squealed in pure delight, breaking my heart. I grinned in spite of myself, until Lady Lu shot a look at me. She held my gaze evenly whilst caressing her daughter's long hair in exactly the same way I had previously, weighing up my value, her blue eyes piercing my soul. I wasn't sure whether to feel guilt, pity, or sorrow.

She set Mei down on the ground, who continued to gaze up at her mother in awe and wonder, who, in her eyes, could do no wrong.

'Thankyou,' she replied curtly, as I saw, out of the corner of my eye, Zhang Liao, wandering closer across the courtyard.

'Its alright… I just wanted to help, and to say so-'

'Your apologies mean nothing to me, Lady Chan. You mean nothing to me.'

I hung my head, ashamed. This was all my fault. I truly felt the guilt and pain that she intended me to feel.

Zhang Liao had now reached us. He bent down to ruffle Mei's hair, who stuck her tongue out at him playfully, suddenly so much more optimistic than the rest of us.

And then Zhang Liao leaned towards Lady Lu in a way which struck the very chords of my heart. He whispered something in her ear, delicately, I could see the folds of her glossy hair flutter as his breath caught her cheek. A hand stroked her back, she gazed at him with affection. My soul descended with negativity as he smiled fondly in return.

'Come on, I'll take care of you now,' he said with affection, gesturing towards some tents which sat on the outskirts of the palace. I assumed that this was where we would be attended to. He took hold of Mei's hand, and placed a hand gently on the small of her mother's back, not even giving me a second glance as he walked off into the moonlight.

I was left, stood on my own, abandoned, mourning after their presence, even that of Lady Lu's. I had never felt so alone. Or so responsible. Responsible for this carnage and the suffering I could see around me.

From the dust beside me, Lu Bu emerged victorious. And there we stood, in front of the wrecked palace, side by side and the perpetrators of such a horrific crime.

'I'm so glad that you're safe… and now you are all mine…'

I ignored Lu Bu as he clutched at the folds of my dress, claiming me as his prize, he eyes alighting upon the charred fabric and my tangled locks. 'We need to sort you out Diao Chan… you are in such a state…'

I continued to ignore him, a lack of emotion upon me. I carried the smell of burnt flesh, death. It would haunt me forever, it was my punishment, along with the racking guilt.

'Diao Chan, speak to me!'

I turned my head, resigned to my fate, tears welling up in my eyes as I realised that there was no returning home. There was no visiting Lady Luo's Girls Academy. I would not dine with my father again, and entertain men in the way I had used to, dancing flirtatiously whilst Yun entertained his guests, part of the game, always part of the game.

This was the end of that game. I was simply a pawn, Yun had been a player, and Lu Bu had emerged as the winner. Dong Zhuo had lost. It was over, I was his. This was my life now. Zhang Liao too had no time for me; for he had a strange connection to Lady Lu which made me sick to my stomach. For me to think he would possibly ever want me…

I simply wanted someone to take my hand and tell me that everything would be alright, that soon the sun in all its glory would come up, clear the mist, bring the rain to wash away that horrible smell. But instead, Lu Bu curled his fingers around my wrist and wrenched me forwards to join the others, dragging me painfully towards my new life.