AN: I got the idea to this, as crazy as it might sound, when a friend of mine stumbled on a list of bad sex scenes and someone jerked off on the girl's chest three times „like Zorro". Of course, we automatically thought of OUR Zoro and started laughing our asses off. And somehow, I'm not sure myself exactly how, this little ficlet popped up inside my head. Set somewhere between Longring Longland and Water Seven or Sky Island and Longring Longland or whatever.
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Z as in Zoro
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"What the hell is that?"
"That is a marine-bastard."
"That I can see, Zoro. What I wanted to know is what you did to him."
"Got rid of him, maybe?"
"Roronoa Zoro, gimme one more stupid answer and I swear to God that I'll kick your sorry ass!"
"So don't ask me such stupid questions then, bride of Satan!"
"What did you just call my beautiful, enchanting, radiant… what the hell is that?"
"That is a marine-bastard."
"I can see that pretty clearly, Marimo! What did you freakin' do to him!"
"I got rid of him, Prince Fruit Loop!"
"What the hell is that?"
"All right, damn it, what the hell are you guys, bloody parrots!? That is a marine-bastard and I got rid of him! Did everyone hear it now?"
"Oooh, I'm sorry for breathing your precious air. It was just a question, y'know."
"Oi, guys, we should… eww, what the hell is that?"
"That's it! What the hell is your goddamn problem!? It's a marine-bastard! A MARINE-BASTARD I got RID of!"
"Just in case your microscopical jellyfish-brain has missed it, you plague-spot, we're surprised at the interesting pattern on that shitty guy's chest."
"Oi, Sanji, I'm hungry! … is that a Z on that guy's chest?"
"It's a Z alright. Zoro, I really don't mean to say that you have an ego-problem or anything, but this is almost… too big for your boots."
"…"
"Of course does that graveyard for brains have a humongous ego-problem. Let's just call a spade a spade here, since that Z is more evidence than we need to claim that if there were any action figures of himself, he'd be the first to one."
"…"
"Wahaha, Zoro actually carves a Z into his enemy's body!"
"…"
„Now, now, don't tease him so much. Kenshi-san is already blushing… Though I have to admit that this quite an impressive way to rub someone's nose into the certainty who is in fact the stronger one."
"…"
"He copied that from me! I already carved an U into my enemy's dead body long before you guys were even born!"
"…"
"Wow, that had to hurt. Poor thing."
"…"
"What the hell did you do that for, anyway?"
"I THOUGHT IT MIGHT LOOK FANCY, OKAY!? THE IDEA SOUNDED COOL TO ME, SO I WANTED TO TRY IT OUT! AND NOW SHUT THE HELL UP, ALL OF YOU, BECAUSE YOU GUYS ARE WORKING MY LAST NERVE!"
"… he thought it was cool?"
"Pfft!"
"Aw, Zoro, that's so cute!"
"Zoro! Lend me your sword, I wanna carve an L into something, too!"
"Let me carve a C into it!"
"… god damn it, I'm never gonna do anything like this ever again."
