Chapter 1 Don't own twilight. Hope you enjoy this is my first fanfic for the pack and first fanfic that is longer than a one shot. ENJOY

As much as I have always wanted to fit into this world, in my life, I have always been on the outside looking in. I have never truly felt like I have belonged, at least when I look back at the last few years of my life. I see everything I have been through, but yet I find that I can no longer just ignore everything that has happened to make me who I am, and what I have become.

Nothing is as it seems to be, with me, I am who I am and that is all I can ever become. I have a hard time trusting anyone, let alone talking to people. I feel that this move will benefit me in the long run because then I will be able to be myself as I truly have always wanted to be-maybe.

I know that nothing will ultimately change my behavior, but I can always try to forget what my brain tells me. I need to push away these evil thoughts of my demise and the reoccurring daydreams I have when I hear the voices that call me towards my death.

The voices I hear I fight, and I run from them, but if I give into the constant lashing out of the words in my mind, I find it very hard to pull myself from my negative, evil thoughts. They seem so real that I can hardly demand or argue that I should go on.

Now I know this may sound crazy, but I can tell you that if I always thought I was in control of my own actions I would be lying. I have an internal conflict that dwells deep within my mind, although I have never ever told anybody about this for fear that they would declare me a mental case and lock me up.

So, that brings me to the move, where exactly am I moving and who am I moving with? I am going to be staying with a college friend in her home town, yes I know how predictable is that every college kid wants to move in with their college friends instead of heading back to their own mundane hometown.

I am looking forward to the exciting west coast in that I am from the boring Midwestern state of Ohio lavished with cornfields and dirt roads. Moving to Washington will be an exciting chapter in my life for I have never been outside a five state radius and therefore, have no idea what to expect, except what my best friend has told me of the quaint town, the forests, and ocean front.

I arrive at the airport looking for her smiling face as I exit the baggage claim and glee fills my heart for the first time in who knows how long as I see her standing a short distance off waiting impatiently for me to come towards her. Her long black hair tied back in a high pony tail sways back and forth as she runs towards me greeting me in a large hug.

"I can't believe that you are finally here, the last few weeks since graduation have been torture. I missed you so much. I hope going home for you wasn't that bad." Leah exclaims with a happy yet somber expression.

"No, it was an unexpected goodbye for anyone I saw, but I am so excited to be here away from everyone I know except for you that is." I said smiling but hoping internally that my existence, here could distract me from my mind wondering towards the negative.

"Come on, let's go, I can't wait for you to meet everyone?" Leah says taking my suitcase and heading towards the door.

"E..Everyone…" I squeak out, "What do you mean everyone?"

"You know my brother and mine and his friends…you'll have to meet them all eventually, plus you just might like one of them. A few are actually still single if you can believe that." Leah explained winking at me at the last comment.

Okay, I am terrified, I mean I knew that Leah had friends but she never really talked about them at school, she said that she went away to college to get away from them for a while. She needed to come to terms with some things that had happened between her and her friends and family. I never expected her to actually have made up with them all before I moved here she has never said anything had gotten better, but Leah has always been quite secretive about her life at home. I wonder what changed, I can't help but be scared at the last comment that she said with a wink, 'some of them are still single,' what was that, is she trying to set me up with someone ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh I am going to jump out of my own skin.

I'll leave, better yet open the truck door and jump out, we are going 60. I could really die if I do it right, NO, No don't think thoughts like that stop…..I slam my fist hard into my knee waking myself up from my evil rant in my brain effectively snapping myself back into reality, only to find Leah looking at me like I am insane, lost, terrified.

"What's wrong, Larke, you look like I'm going to throw you to a pack of wolves." Leah says with a small laugh.

"Uhh….sorry you know how I get meeting new people. I don't like large crowds when you said everyone…I just …don't know how I can handle that." I stammered trying to hide my real thoughts from her turning towards the window staring blankly at the passing trees.

"Don't worry Larks I'm not going to do that to you, you forget I spent three years with you at college and know how you get in the middle of a large crowd of strangers. I assure you that everyone will love you to death…their all family to me like a bunch of little brothers, you know." She said and I could hear her smiling as she said these words to me, just like her to try to reassure my ever nervous, anxious thoughts.