"Do I disgust you?" Scorpius snapped at him. "Am I so freaky that you can't stand to be in the same room as me?"

Al shook his head.

"Then why have you been avoiding me?"

Al opened his mouth, and then closed it. He shrugged.

"Why won't you talk to me?"

Al shrugged again. He wanted to look up and see what Scorpius's reaction was, but he couldn't bring himself to lift his head.

"Talk to me, Potter!"

The use of his last name stung. Last names had always been reserved for their enemies, like Bole.

"Talk to me!" Scorpius reached out and shoved Al's shoulder. Al slammed against the wall, and dropped to the floor instinctively.

"Oh, no. Al, I'm sorry. I just... why won't you talk to me?"

He reached out slowly, and Al flinched away from his hand.

"Look what I've done. Damn it! I'm sorry, Al."

Scorpius dropped his hand and turned away. Al stood quickly, and reached out to touch Scorpius.

When Scorpius moved to turn back towards Al, Al cried, "No!" Both of them were shocked by his speech.

"I'm... don't turn... please."Al had to force each word out. It was hard, but the thought of hurting Scorpius forced him to try to explain.

Scorpius nodded and faced away from Al.

"You are my... friend. I'm..." Al's voice trailed off.

"What? What are you?"

Al stared at the back of Scorpius's head, his hand on Scorpius's shoulder. "I'm... regressing."

Scorpius turned then, knocking Al's hand from his shoulder, and his gaze caught Al's for a minute before Al's eyes fell to the ground.

"What do you mean you are regressing?"

Al could feel Scorpius looking at him, examining him. The words locked themselves up inside of him again. He shrugged.

"You mean... you regressed around Topaz, right?" Al nodded. "You haven't done it since then though." Al shrugged again.

Scorpius reached out and pushed Al's chin up until he was looking at Scorpius. "I'm sorry. This isn't your fault. We'll figure out how to beat this, okay?"

Al gazed into his best mates grey eyes and struggled not to lean into his touch. They were friends. Scorpius had Bole. Logic didn't stop his heart from beating overtime.

"Okay?"

Al nodded, and used the motion as an excuse to lean into Scorpius. He didn't know if they would be able to work this out, but he had to make an attempt. He missed his friend too much not to try.

"Potions?"

A week had passed since Scorpius cornered him, and Al was finally able to say single words to Scorpius. They had started with Al writing Scorpius notes and Scorpius replying vocally, and then they had moved on to keeping Al from focusing on the ground instead of Scorpius.

Now Al would say a word, and Scorpius would talk about the subject until he covered whatever it was that Al had wanted to talk about.

Scorpius started ranting about their latest potions class in reply to Al's question, and Al just listened with a smile. Over the past week, the two of them had spent every day together. They sat together at classes, they ate together at meals, and they did homework together at night. Al had never spent so much time together with his best mate before, and he loved having Scorpius's undivided attention. Now he knew why all of his girlfriends had wanted to spend every minute together. There was nothing like spending time with the person you loved.

They had—Al loved Scorpius? Where had that come from? Al continued to let Scorpius's voice flow over him, but his attention had been captured by his thoughts.

When had Al fallen in love with Scorpius? He looked at the boy in front of him, and considered this. He couldn't think of a specific time, or even a reason why, he had fallen in love. He just was.

Was he really in love? His earlier thoughts about love came back to him. They spent all of their time together, like Al's parents. They fought with kindness, like Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron. Mostly though, they supported each other, like Al's grandparents. So, it had to be love.

Al revelled in the knowledge for a moment. It felt like the truth; it felt comfortable and warm, like a fuzzy old blanket you took to be every night even though it was grey instead of white and one corner was coming unravelled. Then the reality of the situation came crashing back down on him. Scorpius was a boy.

What would people say?

Al was shocked to realize he couldn't care less. His whole life he had worried what people thought about him. When he was still unable to speak, he would worry that everyone he met thought he was stupid or crazy. But when it came to Scorpius, nothing mattered. All that mattered was Scorpius.

That was an even bigger problem though.

Al watched his friend babble on about potions, and he struggled not to smile sappily at Scorpius. The Slytherin common room was not the place to show weakness, and most of the Slytherins deemed love the ultimate weakness. Al knew it was the ultimate strength.

Out of the corner of his eye, Al saw Bole frown at Scorpius. Then he glared in Al's direction. Al returned his glare, and scooted his chair closer to Scorpius's. Bole didn't love Scorpius, and Al refused to let Bole hurt his best mate. Seven years of solid friendship was worth way more than three years of fucking.

Al's movements distracted Scorpius from his speech, and he looked at Al and smiled broadly. Al returned the smile, his heart fluttering. Surely, friendship was worth more than a fuck. Right?

Bole walked by then, and dropped a note into Scorpius's lap as he passed. He smirked at Al, and entered the seventh year boys' dorms. Scorpius's eyes followed Bole and then fell to the note. He opened it and read it silently. Then he shoved the note into his bag and turned to Al.

"What do you want to talk about now?" he asked.

Al looked at his friends face, monitoring his expression. "Bole," he said. Scorpius's face flickered, but Al didn't know what emotion had shown up in that split second.

"Bole's a bastard, as always. What else do you want to talk about?" Al knew he was trying to change the subject; too bad Al didn't want the subject changed.

"Note?"

Scorpius gulped and looked away. "He just wants to talk later."

"Liar." There was no way that was all that Bole had wanted. Not with that smirk he had shot Al.

Scorpius turned back to him and glared. "I'm not lying. He said he wanted to meet me later."

Al fought back the urge to laugh madly. "Sex," was what Bole really wanted.

Scorpius blushed, but he kept his gaze steady on Al's face. "Well, I don't want that. So, all it will be is just talking. Thus, I didn't lie!"

He didn't want sex? "Why?"

Scorpius scoffed. "Why didn't I lie? Because I wouldn't lie to you!"

Al was touched, but that wasn't what he meant. "No sex... why?" he managed to murmur, casting his glance around to be sure no one was in hearing distance.

"Um... I... It's just..." Scorpius blushed a bright red. "It's because I'm done with him."

Al brightened. Really? Was that why Bole had seemed so upset with Al? "Why?"

"Bole was the only gay I knew, so when he offered sex without strings on the train in fourth year, I took him up on it. Now though... I love someone. I don't want to jeopardize my relationship with him for Bole."

Al's heart shattered. Al didn't have to worry about Bole. He could compete against that brat. If Scorpius had fallen in love though, Al had no chance.

"Who?" he said, his voice steady even though his heart felt like a pile of broken glass.

Scorpius blushed and looked away. "A really special bloke. I have no chance with him, but that's okay. I'll just be happy if I can be around him."

The shards of Al's heart were puncturing his lungs. It was the only explanation for why every breath hurt. Me! he wanted to shout at the top of his lungs. Pick me, love me, and I'll love you forever and ever!

Instead, he muttered, "Oh," and turned back to his homework. The two of them studied in silence for the rest of the evening.

Things were rapidly going down the toilet. Ever since Scorpius had told him he was in love with someone else, Al hadn't been able to talk to him. Well, technically, Al probably could talk to him, but the only words that seemed to want to come out of his mouth were "I love you."

When they went to bed that night, Al tried to say "Goodnight," but the word had refused to come out. Scorpius had frowned at him but let it pass when Al waved instead.

At breakfast, he had tried to ask for the maple syrup and "I love" had come tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop himself. Thankfully, Scorpius had taken it to mean that he loved maple syrup and had passed him the container.

While trying to turn his needle into a haystack in Transfiguration, Al had told his wand "I love you" because Scorpius walked into his line of vision while he was trying to cast the spell. In Herbology, he told a Spiny Cattail Cactus he loved it, and in Charms, Professor Flitwick himself had ended up being the object of Al's affection.

Meanwhile, Al hadn't said a single word to Scorpius all day, and as night got closer, he found himself unable to look up from the floor when he was around Scorpius. Scorpius kept getting more and more frustrated with Al.

It was just as the sun was setting that Scorpius lost his patience with Al. They had been working on homework in the library, and passing notes back and forth, when Al suddenly found himself stricken with the inability to even write to Scorpius.

All he could think about was that Scorpius loved some other boy. Some boy that wasn't Al. No matter what Al did, no matter what he said, he would never be good enough for Scorpius. He probably wasn't even good enough for Scorpius to fuck.

Scorpius had probably liked fucking Bole because he could talk. He could moan things like "Malfoy, right there!" He could tempt Scorpius with dirty talk.

All Al could do was pass notes. That would make sex rather difficult.

When Scorpius shoved the note they had been passing over onto Al's side of the desk, Al reached out to grab it and write back, and all of his insecurities caught up to him. Why was Scorpius bothering? Al wasn't worth all of this work.

He sat there staring at the piece of parchment, his hand hovering over it but not touching it. If Al told Scorpius to give up, Scorpius would be able to spend time with the bloke he loved. He wouldn't have to waste his time on Al.

He must have sat there deliberating for a while because Scorpius reached out to touch him and asked, "Are you all right?"

Al looked up at the man he loved. Scorpius deserved someone he could talk with. Al stood and shoved his things into his bag.

"Al... what are you doing?"

Al moved over to the door. He couldn't look back. He couldn't let himself monopolize Scorpius's time.

"Albus Severus Potter! Where the hell are you going?"

He didn't really know. Al could see the sun setting outside of the castle, and he moved towards the nearest exit. He needed to escape. The hallways were making him feel claustrophobic.

He had just about the doors to the gardens when he felt a hand grasp his shoulder. Al wrenched himself free from the hand, his bag falling unheeded to the floor, and he ran. His chest hurt, and his lungs burned, but still he ran.

He was past the gardens and halfway across the lawn before Scorpius caught up to him. He grabbed Al by the wrist and spun him around. Al kept his head turned away from Scorpius, staring at the Forbidden Forest he had been running toward. The shadows along the edge of the forest moved, and Al shuddered.

"What was that all about? Have you lost your mind?"

Al shook his head. He hadn't lost his mind, he'd only lost his heart.

"Talk to me!" Scorpius shook him gently. Even in his anger, he was kind. "Why won't you talk to me?"

Al was frustrated. Scorpius should know why. They had been over this. He tried to pull his arm free of Scorpius's grip, but Scorpius refused to release him. Finally, he forced the word "regressing" out of his lips, holding back the three words that wanted to come out.

Scorpius refused to take that as an answer. "Why are you regressing? You haven't regressed since Topaz. Why are you regressing now?"

Why wouldn't Scorpius just let him go? Al struggled to pull himself free.

"Al... why now?"

The words were pushing to come out. "I... love..." Al cut off his words before the last one could escape.

Scorpius grip loosened, and Al jerked himself free. He stood there panting the need to escape warring with the urge to tell Scorpius everything.

"You're in love?" Scorpius asked, and Al nodded. "With who?"

Al looked up then. Scorpius's face was contorted by an emotion that Al couldn't pinpoint. He reached out and smoothed the lines of Scorpius's face.

Scorpius grasped his hand lightly. "Who?" he repeated.

This was it. This was the end of everything. Scorpius would hate him, would avoid him, wouldn't want to be around him. Nothing would ever be the same. He couldn't say it.

Al turned the question back on him. "You... love... who?"

Scorpius gripped Al's hand harshly. "I... I can't tell you," Scorpius said desperately.

Al shook his head. He couldn't tell Scorpius, not when it would lead to his heart being broken. "Who?" Al asked again.

Scorpius looked away then. His mouth opened and closed, and then he sighed. "You."

Al jerked his hand from Scorpius's. Was this a joke or was he being serious? "I..."

Scorpius turned to leave, and Al wanted to cry. "I'm sorry, Al. I didn't want to fall in love with you. You're my best friend, and I didn't want to lose you. I understand if you want me to go away now."

Al took a deep breath. The words felt trapped again, but he didn't care. He had to keep Scorpius from leaving. He forced himself to speak.

"I... you."

Scorpius looked back at him. "What?"

"Love."

Scorpius had a look of dawning understanding on his face. "Love what?"

"I love... you."

Scorpius smiled then, a beatific smile that lit up the sky more than the setting sun. "Really?"

Al smiled back at him. "I love you," he said again.

Scorpius reached out and took his hand. "No joke?"

In a rush, like a dam breaking, the words began to flow out of Al. "I love you. I've loved you for years. I think I've loved you since before I knew what love really was. I was so glad that you never dated, and I never realized why. I judged all of my girlfriends against you, and they all came up wanting. When you told me you loved someone, I thought I would die, but I tried to give you up because you deserve someone better than me, someone who can talk and laugh and look and smile."

Scorpius squeezed his hand. "You can talk, Al. You've always been able to talk."

"Not like a normal person. Not like the person you deserve to have."

"You are worth more than anyone else alive." Al shook his head, but Scorpius pressed on. "You've always been able to talk to me. I know that if you smile and don't blink, you're focusing on smiling and it's not real. If you laugh quietly, then you are truly laughing. If you sit quietly, but are reading or writing, then you are content. And when you are upset, you clam up and refuse to talk to anyone."

"That's not talking."

Scorpius smiled. "Maybe I don't want to talk."

What was he on about? "Then what do you want to do?"

Scorpius leaned forward, resting his cheek against Al's. "I want to touch." He sniffed lightly at Al's hair. "I want to smell." He ran his tongue along Al's ear. "I want to taste." Then he pulled away to look into Al's eyes. "I want to see."

Al felt like his heart would burst. How was it possible to love someone this much? He raised his hands and wrapped his arms around Scorpius's neck. "I want to feel," he said as he pulled Scorpius closer and pressed a kiss to his lips. Scorpius responded happily.

It was the perfect kiss: soft and sweet, and then hard and fast. Both boys were gasping for breath when they pulled away.

Scorpius brushed the hair away from Al's face. "Talking takes more than words."

Al nodded, and looked away. "I just want to be sure... Bole is...?"

Scorpius pressed a kiss on his temple. "Bole and I are through. He was nothing but a substitute for you."

Al was startled. "A substitute? We are nothing alike!"

Scorpius laughed. "You both have brown hair and green eyes. You are stubborn in your efforts to talk, and Bole is stubborn in his efforts to pretend he is straight."

Al spluttered. "That's, that's like saying I dated Topaz because she looked like you!"

Scorpius raised an eyebrow. "Why did you date her then?"

Al considered that for a moment. "Well, I saw her blonde hair on the train and... thought she was you. Oh."

"Exactly."

They shared a laugh, and then Al smiled up at Scorpius. "We're dating now, right?"

"Of course. You must be crazy if you think I'll let anyone else have you."

"Good." Al took Scorpius's hand in his, and turned back to the castle just as the last sliver of the sun fell into the horizon. They walked quietly, but they shared a conversation of smiles, glances, and touches.

Al knew that silence would never again be painful as long as he had Scorpius by his side.

THE END!