Chapter 1

The sky was just beginning to show edges of gray when Rei bolted up from bed shaking. She touched her face tentatively. It was wet. "Not again," she groaned and fell backwards into her pillow. The clock on her nightstand had block red numbers reading, "5:07 AM." She pulled the blankets back over her head and tried to smother The Dream that had been recurring recently, probably a few times a week. Ugh, she thought, taking deep, calming breaths and settling back into her soft bed. Go to sleep, she told herself sternly. She lay there motionless for a few minutes.

Huffing in frustration, she threw aside the covers more violently than she intended to and stomped to the bathroom for a drink of water. It was impossible to fall asleep after these episodes without considerable meditation. The memory of narrowed golden eyes and magenta stripes haunted her, refusing to let her return to the realm of sleep. When she woke up, she could never recall specifics, only that the dream was clearly about Sesshoumaru and that she would be jerked from dreamland in a state of tears and heartache.

Damn it. The origin of her dreams was unquestionable. She had just broken up with her boyfriend, Akira, a few weeks ago. It was a bad breakup, with no chance of reconciliation and definitely no possibility of "Let's be friends." She didn't feel terribly bad about it now. What pissed her off was that The Dream came back every time she lost a boyfriend, like Sesshoumaru was snidely suggesting that she was still stuck on him. "I'm not," she said out loud, and then felt immediately stupid. She was even more furious that Sesshoumaru managed to rudely interfere with her life three years after she had said her final goodbye.

Rei was nineteen now, having just finished her first year of college. It was an acceptable year, distracting and very busy, which was helpful. Now it was summer. Not only was she subjected to these miserable dreams, but she was again in close proximity with her grandmother and the horrible well. She felt that she was holding up decently, however, under the circumstances, proud to note that she still hadn't strayed too close to the dreaded time-portal.

With a sigh, she gulped down the cold water to clear her head and then headed back for her bedroom. To her unhappy discovery, the horizon was faintly pink now, meaning dreaded sunlight was not too far away. She cursed Akira, the well, the sun, and most of all, Sesshoumaru, and concentrated hard on pretending to sleep.

xXx

"Geez, Grandma, slow down, okay?" Rei hurried after her elderly grandmother and put a supporting hand under her elbow as the old woman stepped outside. These days, Kagome was still restless as ever, but her health was deteriorating, and someone had to stay with her at all times to make sure she didn't do anything to hurt herself. Today, it was Rei's turn. It seemed like there were a lot of days this summer that she was stuck watching Kagome. Well, she thought reasonably, I am gone most of the year for college, so it's probably fair that I get saddled with the majority of the responsibility for the few months I'm back.

But it wasn't easy. Originally, Rei expected babysitting her grandmother to be an easy job. How much trouble can she get into? She can barely walk on her own. She was sorely disappointed. Between juggling her chores, she had to keep a watchful eye on Kagome, whose weakening legs did not agree with her wandering nature.

The water is still boiling on the stove, Rei realized nervously as she followed her grandmother to the Goshinboku. Her sleeves were still rolled up, an apron draped around her waist. "Grandma," she reminded her, "Aren't you hungry? Lunch is still in its beginning stages."

"Lunch can wait," Kagome said impatiently, waving a vague hand. "Stay with me for a minute. Barely get to talk to my own granddaughter these days."

Ah, today's going to be an easy day. She's perfectly normal. Kagome wavered between clear-headed and normal, and raving and senile. The past few years after Rei's return had been good ones, and Kagome had shown steady signs of improvement. Rei's mother was even beginning to grudgingly get along with the old woman on good days. "Of course, Grandma."

They sat silently under the sacred tree for a short while, enjoying the beautiful weather and comfortable breeze. Kagome spoke up, "How is that boy you are seeing? What's his name? I can't seem to remember. I'm getting old."

"Akira. We broke up," said Rei shortly. A vision of Sesshoumaru, glowing and beautiful, flashed across her mind. Mentally, she stabbed herself a little.

Kagome clucked her tongue. "Pity, pity. He was a nice boy. I liked him."

Something was tugging at Rei. She wanted to say it, but was afraid what her grandmother might say. "Grandma?" she began timidly.

"Yes, dear?"

She fiddled with her thumbs, looking down, wondering if she should just let it go, let the moment pass. "There's…a friend of mine, who was in love with this guy." I can't believe I'm using this lame "my friend" ruse. "And then, for one reason or another, she dumped him, and never saw him again." She paused. "And then she felt very sad. She tried to get over it. She met other boys and dated some really great ones. But somehow…" she trailed off. She looked over at Kagome.

Her grandmother's eyes were glazed over. She shook herself and smiled at her granddaughter a little absentmindedly. "What did you say, Reimi?"

Rei closed her eyes and let the doubt slide away. "Forget it. Let's get inside."

xXx

It was almost nighttime when everyone got home. "I'm going to bed," Rei said weakly, wanting nothing more than to forget the day's events in a deep, drugged sleep. Her eyes felt scratchy and sore. She rubbed them.

"Rei?" her mother said softly, "This isn't going to make you feel much better, but at least she's in a better place. She wasn't ever happy here."

Rei didn't turn around. "I know, Mom." She trundled upstairs, hunched over like heavy troubles were on her shoulders. The stairs felt steeper and longer. Her room was the same as before, and it seemed wrong somehow. The universe should be different, but it wasn't. Rei remembered back when she thought Rin had died. The sun shone then too, like nothing had changed. But that wasn't the same thing. Rin hadn't really died.

Kagome was really dead.

She had been cremated, her ashes buried in the ground, in the family plot, next to her own mother and her brother Souta, who had died in a car accident when Rei was just a little girl.

But not next to Grandpa. Nobody knew where he was, if he was still alive, if he had remarried. Some wild hope kindled in Rei's heart that perhaps her unknown grandfather would show up at the funeral, remorseful at last that he had left his own family so many years ago. Of course, no mystery man showed up. It didn't matter that much. Kagome had never loved him anyway. She was barely upset when he left. She didn't love him like she loved…

Kagome wasn't buried next to Inuyasha either. That was the greatest wrong of all. She was dead now, and probably reunited with him, but it still was…a mistake…for her not to be physically reunited with him.

The funeral was small and quiet. And stupid, thought Rei. Surely, nobody knew Kagome like Rei did. All the things said about being a faithful mother, even in illness, a strong survivor even when her husband left her, sounded dumb and pale. Kagome was so much more than that. She was a heroine. She was brave and patient, smart and kind. Once, she was beautiful and happy and lively and funny. Once, she was passionate and in love with someone who loved her back. Inuyasha wouldn't have left her, even if she lost her mind.

They said she died happy.

What a lie. There was no happy ending to Kagome's story. She was a tragedy; her whole life was a tragedy.

Hot tears were filling Rei's eyes again. She couldn't decide if they were tears of anger or tears of sadness. Maybe a bit of both. She sighed, wiped them away, and collapsed on her bed, suddenly exhausted.

Her mother was right. In the end, as terrible as it seemed, perhaps death wasn't so bad for Kagome. Perhaps now she could finally be at peace. It was a quick death. Heart attack, and she was dead in almost an instant. The shrine would be a lonely place without her.

Summer had barely started a few weeks ago. It was the beginning of June. Rei couldn't bear facing three more months of silence, forcing her to think about things she didn't want to, mourning Kagome's death with no distractions to ease her grief.

Rei went to the bathroom, opened the medicine cabinet and pulled out a bottle of sleeping pills. Normally, she wouldn't condone this type of behavior, but right now, she wanted instant sleep, with no dreams. She didn't think she could handle The Dream. Not tonight. She popped a couple of pills into her mouth and chased them down with cold water.

She changed into her pajamas and got into bed. She curled up, pulled the blankets over her head, and let the peaceful darkness claim her.

When she woke up in the morning, her head felt like it was full of lead. Sleeping pills are never a good idea, kids. Somehow, she managed to lift her head from the pillow, get up and get dressed. An urgent matter was pressing. She had woken up with a crazy thought in her head, but this time, she was going to act on it. And she had to do it before she began to have second thoughts. No time for those. I've been having second thoughts for three years.

She scrambled around the house looking for a sheet of paper. "Ouch, damnit!" she shrieked as she jammed her toe into the side of a coffee table. Ejecting a colorful stream of curses undertone, she hopped around the living room wondering why in her moment of need, there was absolutely no paper to be found anywhere. Right as she was about to chop down the Goshinboku, sacred tree or no, to manufacture paper out of it, she remembered that there were still notebooks in her backpack. She ran to her room, dumped all the contents of the backpack unceremoniously onto her bed, ripped a sheet of notebook paper out, and began scribbling a message in pen.

"Dear Mom and Dad,

I don't know exactly what to say to make you understand what I'm about to do. I'm going back into the well. Back in time. I'm really sorry, but this can't wait until you get back. It's probably better that you're out anyway, otherwise, you'd try to convince me to stay here, and you'd probably succeed.

I didn't tell you the whole truth when I came back last time. I—

This is really hard.

I'm in love. Yeah.

I thought it was just puppy love, impossible, a fling, whatever, you know? But it's been three years, and I'm still in love. A lot in love.

Remember when I told you about the demon that I was with the entire time I was in the past? It's him. I know this is not the ideal guy you would like me to date, or fall in love with for that matter. There isn't anything I can do about that.

When I came back three years ago, I told him it wouldn't work out. His life span is…not exactly compatible with mine. And he doesn't age, which would probably be a problem eventually. There were so many reasons that we just could not, should not be together. I told him. He wasn't as convinced as I was, but he let me go. I thought I could just forget about it, and that would be that.

It wasn't that easy. Mom, I'm still in love with him. I realized when Grandma died, that she was miserable because she lost the man she loved. There wasn't anything she could do about it. I lost the person I loved too. But I can do something about it, so I'm not going to sit here and grow old and bitter. I can't.

This sounds so ridiculous on paper. Please burn it after you're done reading it.

I have to go back. If he's found someone else, then fine. I can live knowing that I tried, at least. I thought I should tip you off, so you don't report my disappearance to the authorities again. I'll be back before school starts, I promise. I have to take care of this. Please trust me. I wish I could write a longer explanation, and I'm sorry I didn't tell you the whole story three years ago, but I need to go before I explode.

You know what's really funny? When I was in the past and things were going wrong, I kept telling myself that everything would be better in the future. That's how I kept myself going through the worst times. But then I did go into the future, and all I wanted to do was dive into the well and return to the past.

Anyway, I love you both so much, and a thousand apologies could not be enough for what I'm doing now.

-Rei."

She put the note in a conspicuous place—the kitchen counter—and rushed out the door. I can't believe I'm doing this. What if he doesn't even want to see me anymore? Her heart started thumping when she crossed the invisible line that marked "too close to the well." The heavy door to the well house creaked when she pushed it open. Inside, it was dustier than she believed possible, and completely unkempt. Apparently, nobody else had bothered to go close to the place either.

Tentatively, she crept toward the well, praying, hoping that it would work still. It looked uncompromisingly gross at the bottom. Well, hopefully, I won't be touching the bottom, at least, not in this century. Carefully, she climbed over the edge.

She jumped, and to both her relief and dismay, the blue light caught her, and off she went.