SUMMARY: The Super Character Of The World is the most elitist award show in the fictional world. And the Death note characters have been nominated for almost about every category. Most of them won. Most of them were sent to a private jet, headed towards a luxurious vacation in oblivion. -coughs- I'm sorry, Bolivia.

DISCLAIMER: Me no own, you no sue. After all, if I did own Death Note, everything you are about to read would be canon. So yeah.

RATING: T (maybe, what's the average raiting for crack?)

WARNINGS: Probably spoilers for every single episode, implied yaoi featuring every pairing in the book, focused mainly on the ever populars M&M and L&L.

A Trip To Oblivion

Prologue

The blonde, sexy, busty hostess smiled, while twirling a yellow envelope in her perfectly manicured hands.

"And the Best Vilain nominees are... Light Yagami."

A thundering applause filled the room. A huge photograph of the first and original Kira showed up on the gigantic monitor. Then, a number of clips.

"Mr. Yagami was nominated by our fans... quoting "because he takes potato chips and eats them", "because he writes epically" and "because he has the cutest laugh". Aww."

Right in the front row of red velvet seats, Light Yagami bowed his head, acknowledging his popularity.

"The second nominee is Mello...

"YAY!!"

The hostess paused her presentation, only to look at a tall, stripy figure on the second row, waving a huge flag right above Light Yagami's face. Besides stripy, he was also very jumpy. And noisy. As, in fact, was his whole row. On his right side, a not-so-excited L played a huge multicolored guitar, and on his left, Near sat in his normally odd position, lighting fireworks from time to time.

The camera focused on the flag for a split second.

"Go-Happy-Go-Wammy-GO!"

Mello was probably loving all that attention. Except... he was nowhere to be seen.

The hostess rolled her eyes and smiled.

"Let's just skip to the third nominee, shall we? Ladies in gentlemen, please applaud... Teru Mikami!"

"Sakujo, bitch!" – the stripy figure yelled, yet again.

"Mr. Jeevas, please respect your co-workers."

"He's not my co-worker, he's a serial sakujer! And a potential rapis..." – a gloved hand covered his mouth, and it definitively did not belong to a certain skinny blonde. No, it belonged to a giant gorilla. Sort of speak.

Matt was dragged out of the room, causing many fan girls and the occasional fan boy to drool, faint or shoot smoke bombs.

The hostess blinked attractively, capturing all the camera attention, yet again.

"And the winner is..."

In the front row, a nervous black haired lawyer raised his eyes to the stage.

"Kami?"

"MIKAMI!"

The same black-haired lawyer cocked his head to the side lightly.

"No Kami?"

L opened his arms to the sky, obviously delighted, dropping the gigantic pink lollipop he had been... eating?

"No KAMI, no KIRA! I'm going on VACATION!"

Light crossed his legs elegantly, ignoring L with every inch of classiness he could muster.

"Mr. Mikami, please, come over here to receive your award."

He did. He actually found it very complicated to hold such a big, so he just put it down, and stopped by the microphone to say a few words.

He was interrupted by another fan girl.

"Mikami, I LOVE YOU! You are so sexaaaaayyyyyy! You are such a..." – the gorilla came back, moving his fists in a threatening way. – "...such a fine gentleman and... and you have the most amazing sense of justice I've ever seen."

Mikami smiled, tears in his eyes.

"Thank you, fan girl."

The hostess pushed him off the stage. Smiling again, showing her pearly white teeth, she posed like a wannabe model, and the curtains closed.

Silence.

"There is a 97 percent chance that we must clap our hands now."

AN - Bahaha, this is the single most ridiculous thing I've ever written in my whole life. I like it, though. Be nice, R&R, worship me... you know, the usual stuff. :D Have fun!