An idea I've had for a while now, but I more or less changed practically the entire plot while I was writing it. Hope you enjoy.

Warning: Mild language, yaoi, scenes of a sexual nature

Disclaimer: I don not own Naruto nor any of its characters

Rating: M

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"Hey, Naruto!" Brilliant blue eyes half hidden by a messy head of blonde spikes searched through the crowd of students gathered in the courtyard in front of Kohona High, quickly leaving the grounds or lingering a moment longer in wait of friends or rides, for the oen that had called his name.

"Naruto," A femine voice called again. Turning to his right, the blonde noticed the unmistakable pink hair of his friend rushing towards him through the crowd.

"Sakura-chan, Hinata-chan," Naruto grinned at the shy dark haired and pale-eyed girl hiding slightly behind the pinkette, recieving a blush and a jerky nod in return. Turning his attention back to the girl in front, a wide grin spilt his face in two, "What's up?"

Still searching the crowd for the rest of their friends, or at least one in particular, Sakura replied absently, "Hinata, Ino, Kiba, and I are going to the mall, wanna come?" The pinkette glanced back at the blonde, trying to guess the answer from his expression.

"Nah," The blonde answered as he started walking away, waving a hand around in dismissal, "I'm gonna hang out with Tenten in a bit," Noticing the slight glint in Sakura's eyes, Naruto added before she could say anything, "There's Teme over there, why don't you ask him?"

Sakura was gone in a cloud of dust in the direction Naruto had indicated before she could make her cynical comment, dragging the raven haired girl behind her.

"Poor Hinata-chan," Naruto chuckled, with a tinge of guilt, as he left the school yard, quickly heading home to get ready.

Naruto was sure Sakura had been about to make a comment about his newest girlfriend, and how long it would take until she met his brother. The bonde was more or less certain that his friends had started a betting pool on the subject.

'Bastards.' The blonde thought grudgingly, hating to admit even to himself it was only a matter of time until Tenten also fell victum to his Nii-san.

Naruto had gone out on a few dates with Tenten already, though they weren't officially going out. It was the first time they were going to be at his house for an extended period of time, due to Tenten's insistence and Naruto's reluctance to explain why he didn't want her over at his house.

The blonde teen was more than slightly nervous, but quickly reminded himself his brother wouldn't be home until later that night.

"It's Tuesday," The blonde muttered out loud to himself, doubling checking his watch to be sure, "Nii-san won't be home until after ten. Plenty of time."

Grinning in relief, the blonde walked quickly through the streets of Kohona, trying to ignore the paranoid coiling in his stomach that usually indicated he couldn't be more wrong if he tried.

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"I'm home," Called the blonde haired teen cheerfully into the seemingly empty house, sliding off his shoes as he set his backpack beside the exit, ready to be grabbed on his way out in the morning. Unfinished homework included.

Heading into the kitchen, the fair haired teen unzipped his favourite orange and black sweater, fanning the exposed ebony skin on his face and neck with his hand. It was too close to summer to be wearing a sweater, but his friends had kindly asked him to stop wearing orange in such a vast quantity.

Well, it was more of a demand, really. His friends had stormed into his house claiming he needed an 'intervention'. Something about being obsessed and an unhealthy amount of orange, followed by a "We love you, Naruto, this is for your own good and all those not colour blind," and the long, torturous burning of all his orange articles of clothing except the sweater he had been wearing at the time, that he refused to let them burn without him still in it.

Naruto pouted at the memory, grumbling about his 'sadistic bastard friends' as he grabbed a pot from the cupboard, filling it with water as he set the stove to it's highest setting.

Strangely enough, ever since that incident, that Naruto always referred to as 'No Orange Friday' usually followed by a heart wrenching sob, he had been asked out on more dates than he could count with both hands. There would most likely have been more, too, but after a while the blonde was able to catch the glint in a person's eye when they were about to ask him out, and he would run away or push the teme at them.

Naruto snickered slightly as he remembered the last time someone had approached him. Right when they were about to open their mouth, Naruto had shoulder checked Sasuke Uchiha, his long term rival/best friend into the upper classman, claiming he forgot a book in the library. Glancing over his shoulder, he remembered the bastard strangling the older boy. 'Served him right.

Yes, that was right. Naruto Uzumaki was approached time after time by men. Not women, men. And Naruto blamed his orange burning friends.

Naruto was tall with nicely tanned skin, sun kissed hair, and arguable (only if you're Ino and have a superiority complex larger than a Super MalMart) the most brilliant blue eyes in Kohona. He was good at sports, had just above average grades, and was used to girls asking him out and flirting with him.

Unfortunately, without his baggy orange wardrobes, he was also lithe with wiry muscles, and slightly, though not excessively, feminely curved. And now he was used to boys joking (hopefully) with him about his figure and teasing pinches every once and a while.

He cursed his friends to the bowels of a very orange hell.

Setting the pot of water on the stove to boil, the blonde raided the pantry for a packet of instant ramen, frowning when he emerged empty handed.

The paranoid coiled returned as he thought back to when he had been making breakfast, trying to remember if he had seen more than one package at the time.

"Maybe... maybe Nii-san had some for lunch," Naruto murmured, suddenly uncertain. He knew his Nii-san rarely ate his ramen, knowing how much it meant to the blonde and how protective he became of it (Naruto still swears do this day he doesn't know how he scarred his Nii-san with a spoon, and his Nii-san refuses to speak of the incident to anyone) and always asked before he did. Naruto shrugged it off. 'I wasn't around, so it would be impossible for him to ask... there's no other possibility.'

But he could have sworn there had been almost a full box of the packets left.

Glancing round at the clock built in to the stove, he headed towards the stairs. "I only have ten minutes before Tenten gets here, I'll just see if there is any left in my room."

Naruto hummed absently as he jumped up the stairs, trying to ignore the fact that he was talking to himself out loud, a habit of his when he was anxious.

Reaching the top of the flight of stairs, Naruto stopped for a moment, staring at the closed door of his bedroom, the coiling in his stomach tightening painfully.

"Nii-san won't be home until late." Naruto muttered under his breath firmly, forcing his legs to move towards the door. "You're being childish and paranoid, like Teme."

The blonde's lips twitched up at the ends at the comparison, only to drop into a deep frown as he stood in front of his door, the soft moaning coming from inside the room sounding deafening to the blonde as he placed his hand on the door knob, flinching slightly.

'Maybe it's not Tenten... maybe it's not the same as the other times.' Naruto remained outside the door for a few more moments, hand clenched around the door knob until his knuckles turned white, his forehead leaning against the door as he tried to calm his turmoil of emotions.

"Ky, uu,biii," Keened a loud, feminine voice. Wincing at the too high notes, Naruto quicly sudden the door knob, pushing the door open with a wide grin plastered to his face.

"Ne, Nii-san! I'm home!" Naruto remained grinning as he slowly absorbed the scene infront of him, the bitter and familiar feeling of betrayal sending a crack repulsing through his heart.

Lying on top of his orange and black covered bed a lean man with dark red hair was straddling a pale body, legs exposed by the short skirt riding up the woman's thighs, shirt laying forgotten on the floor. The man's hands were running up and down the woman's uncovered sides, the woman's long, pale fingers pulled sharply at the man's long tresses, usually pulled back into a loose ponytail, now disheveled.

At the sound of his voice, the woman gave a loud, suprised squeal, pushing at the man's chest to disconnect his lips from her throat. Pulling the orange comforter up to cover herself, the woman stared at Naruto with a look akin to a deer trapped in headlights.

"Naruto, welcome home." The red haired male grinned at the blonde standing at the door, distangling himself from the other. Standing from the bed, he picked up his discarded shirt from the floor and strode past Naruto, ruffling the blonde hair as he went. "Is that water boiling? Sorry, I must have misplaced your ramen earlier, I'll go get it for you now."

"Nii-san, I thought you had work today." Naruto returned the smile whole heartedly, acting as though he had not just walked in on his brother and his almost-girlfriend screwing around on his bed.

Stopping just outside the door, Kyuubi turned back to Naruto with a feral smile and a wink, "I called in sick, I was so excited to meet your new girl friend. You picked another good one, Otouto." With that the red head continued down the hall and down the stairs, effectively out of sight.

"N-Naru... Naruto-Kun," The hesitant voice drew the blonde away from his thoughts and back to the girl still particially naked on his bed.

Naruto couldn't help but chuckle at the look of her. Lipstick smeared across her lips and cheek, trade mark twin buns had all but completely fallen loose, hands still clutching the comforter to her chest trembling slightly as she waited for the blonde boy to explode at her.

"Ah, sorry, Tenten. I didn't greet you properly when I arrived. Sorry, I wasn't expecting you yet." Blonde bangs fell over darkened blue eyes as Naruto started into the room, ignoring the incredulous look at girl gave him as he scooped up her shirt and passed it to her nicely, all the while grinning widely.

"Naruto-Kun," Tenten started again, hesitantly taking the shirt from the blonde, slightly unnerved from his always present grin.

"Don't worry, Tenten," Naruto cut her off, smiling at her kindly, "I'm not angry. If anything, you should be mad I didn't warn you about my brother. He has a habit of getting infatuated with pretty girls." that I like, Naruto seethed silently, though his smile never wavered.

Naruto escorted Tenten out of the house politely, opening the door for her and bidding her a cheerful farewell as Kyuubi called from the kitchen, "Hope to see you again, Twotwo!"

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"Naruto! Don't run on the stairs, you're gonna--!" A loud shout could be heard from inside the two story house, followed by thump, "Told you so," and a pitiful, "Owwwiiieeee!!"

Outside of the house two teens waited on the sidewalk, a tanned brown haired boy with red tribal markings tattooed to his face was doubled over with laughter at the unseen scene, the second a boy with pale ivory skin, raven black hair framing his face and that stuck out at the back with matching onyx eyes, had an black elegant eyebrow raised as a smirk twitching at his lips.

The door of the house swung open to reveal a blonde teen rubbing the back of his head gingerly and a tall man with his red hair pulled back into a loose ponytail ending the blonde a backpack, a grin stretching his face as he waved the blonde off.

"That's gonna leave a nasty bump," The red head sniggered, looking up to notice the two boys on the sidewalk, "Oi, Uchiha, Inuzuka, make sure he doesn't wander out in front of traffic or something. I don't think his head can take much more damage."

The blonde pouted as he swung his bag onto his back, stuffing his hands into his jean's pockets. "Har, har," He muttered grumpily, "And whose fault was it I couldn't sleep on my bed last night?"

Kyuubi rolled his eyes as the three started towards the school, one raising an eyebrow higher in quetion at the blonde while the other was still too busy chuckling to listen to the blonde's mumbles. "I'll have it washed by the time you get back from school. Geez, sometimes I wonder if you have mysophobia."

"Dobe?" The Uchiha questioned with disinterest when they had turned off of the blonde's street and the brunettes chuckles had died down.

"Don't call me Dobe, Teme," Naruto retorted half heartedly, hopeful to change the subject before he had to tell his friends that his brother had struck again, and find out who had won the bet.

"C'mon, Naruto," Kiba pressed, elbowing the blonde in a conspiratal fashion, "We all know Kyuubi takes a fancy to your girlfriends, so the sooner you admit it, the sooner I win..." The brunette slowly trailed off as he caught sight of Tenten leaning against the wall ahead of them.

Jutting out his lower lip in a way dangerously close to a pout, Kiba gave a loud, "Awe," crossing his arms and sulking slightly, "I thought Kyuubi woulda.. ya know, by now. Dammit, at this rate, Shino's gonna win the bet."

Reaching over Naruto's head, Sasuke gave the brunette a swift knock across the back of his head as Naruto stomped down on his foot, resulting in a howl and Kiba landing on the ground heavily, glaring up at his friends as they kept walking, looking like a kicked puppy.

The two continued towards Tenten as Kiba struggled to his feet, a colourful string of curses falling after them.

"Naruto-Kun," Tenten pushed away from the wall when she noticed them, biting her lip hesitantly as she refused to meet Naruto's eyes.

Onyx eyes darted between the two, noticing the blonde's too wide smile even for a moron, to how the brunette shifted from foot to foot anxiously, staring at the ground as her mouth opened and closed repeated.

"Nee, really, Tenten, you don't have to apologize!" Onyx eyes narrowed slightly in the girl's direction at the words as she seemed to tense slightly, though the rest of his face remained the same.

"I was," The blonde continued when the girl opened her mouth to speak again, curlean eyes tightening slightly, "expecting too much from you. I'm sorry." The words were gentle, in no way accusing, but brown eyes still began to well as the blonde bowed slightly in apology.

"I'm sorry," The girl choked out finally, wondering if she wouldn't feel so bad if the blonde would just yell at her instead of being so understanding.

Naruto's mask cracked every so slightly at the words, smile faltering slightly, 'If you were sorry,' he thought bitterly, trying to keep his smile in place, 'You wouldn't have done it in the first place.'

A loud sigh broke the tense silence between the three teens as the raven haired boy grabbed onto Naruto's elbow, tugging him away from the thick atmosphere. "C'mon, Dobe, we're gonna be late. Inuzuka, get your ass off the ground and hurry up." Sasuke added over his shoulder, not breaking pace.

Naruto threw one last smile at the girl as they walked away, Kiba's cursing becoming louder as he scurried off the ground and ran after them, "Oi, Teme?" Naruto muttered, staring at the hand still attached to his elbow. Waiting for the raven to look at him, he smiled slightly and said, "Thanks," While curlean eyes met onyx.

Sasuke felt his heart skip a beat at the sincere words as he 'hn'ed in reply.

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Eight teenagers stared expectantly at the blonde boy sitting in their midst, head buried in his arms as he worked up the courage to say the words aloud.

Finally, just when the teens were about to either kill the dramatic blonde or continue with their own conversations, Naruto spoke up in a soft, defeated voice, "Nii-san... did it again."

Silence followed the blonde's announcement for approximately three seconds before obnoxious laughter filled the classroom seating the nine teenagers.

Curlean eyes narrowed spitefully at the offending friend, glaring heatedly at the brunette he had been walking with that morning that now was seated across from him, hands clutching his stomach as his tattooed face contorted with mirth.

"I knew it!" He cried happily, ignoring the furious auras coming from some of his friends, wiping the tears from his eyes as he grinned ferally, "I win the bet!"

Two pale hands pushed the laughing boy's head down in one swift move, causing his forehead to bounce off the desk he was seated at, effectively silencing his laughter, only to be replaced by another howl of pain.

"You're so insensitve!" Cried the pinkette, a scowl plastered to both her and the blonde standing on Kiba's other side, both having one hand on the back of the howling boy's head. "This isn't funny anymore! Hell, it never was!"

"Yeah," The blonde girl tossed her bangs out of her face, crossing her arms over her chest as she agreed with her best friend, "You're supposed to be his friend, but you're betting on his misfortune."

The pinkette and blonde sent a glare around to the rest of the boy's in the room, excluding Sasuke and Naruto, to show they knew exactly what was going on and who was doing it.

"I knew it," Naruto grumbled, resting his chin against the palm of his hand and staring out the window of the clasroom, the homemade lunch infront of him completely forgotten, "You guys are so mean."

"Troublesome," Sighed a brunette with his hair pulled back in a tight ponytail, from where he had been sleeping with his head in his arms before the outburst. "It's not like we can do anything else," he yawned, stretching and opening one eye lazily, "Naruto himself doesn't want to do anything to Kyuubi, and I can't see Kyuubi stopping anytime soon unless Naruto says or did something."

The group turned back to the blonde with questioning looks, "You never said anything about it? I thought you gave up, not didn't try." A chubby boy with swirls tattooed to his cheeks asked between bites of his lunch.

Shrugging, Naruto looked back at his friends with a sheepish grin, rubbing the back of his neck, "Well, it's not like I could just punch him out or something, he's doing it for me after all. He'd have to be."

At the confused or blank looks he was recieving the blonde laughed nervously and continued rubbing the back of his neck, "He just wants to make sure I don't fall for anyone who would cheat or something. He told me that the first time."

The blonde looked back out the window, no londer wanting to be a part of the conversation. "How can you be sure that's what he's doing, and it's not just an excuse?" Sakura asked as she exchanged a glance with Ino. Not even Naruto was that naive, right?

Naruto refusd to meet the gaze of any of his friends, though he was sure they were all staring at him. "Well, he's sure as hell not doing it for himself. He's gay."

The room fell quiet as they all waited for Naruto to start cracking up or telling them that he was kidding. When he did neither, Ino let out a breath and said to Sakura, "Well, I guess that explains why he's so good at seducing people."

Sakura nodded, the dark glint returning to her eye. "Ne, Ino, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

The platinum blonde girl hesitated for only a moment before a grin broke across her face. "Why, yes, Sakura, I do believe I am."

Kiba, still pouting and rubbing his forehead sourly, looked between the two girls grinning deviously and asked in a suspicious voice, "What the hell are you two going on about?"

Both girls turned eerily towards Naruto, who was eyeing them suspiciously, backing up a bit into the chair. "No," He said in a guarded voice, denying the urge to run, "I don't care what it is. No."

The immediate refusal didn't deter either girl in the least as they said to the rest of the group, grins never faltering, "We do believe we should put that theory to the test."

No one spoke, waiting for the girls to explain their plan. After a minute of silence, Hinata gasped loudly, pale eyes staring widely at the two girls as her face began to resemble that of a tomatoe. "Y-y--you wa-want N-N-N-N-N-Naru--"

Impatient with the girl's stuttering, Ino and Sakura shouted together, "Naruto Uzumaki, we're going to find you a boyfriend!"

Silence once again filled the room as everyone slowly obsorbed the news, before,

3...

2...

1...

"WHAAAT?!"

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I know this is the second story I've started this week, but I wanted to try a verity of genres.

Sorry, it's not beta'd yet so it's probably full of mistakes.

Please review, I really don't know if the plot is interesting or not,

KyoKotou