;Disclaimer I do not own any of the Twilight characters. They belond to Stephanie Meyer. (Even though I'm sure a lot of us wish we did.) Oh and this has spoilers for New Moon Don't say I didn't warn ya
The engine roared to life as Bella Sawn turned the key in the ignition of her old red truck. The roar was loud, like something crashing to its feet. That's how she felt anyway. She felt like crashing and burning because everything she loved was gone! Edward Cullen, everything she wanted was gone.
She drove her truck all the way to La Push. When she drove up the familiar drive way she felt a bit better. For the last week she had been trying to get out a bit more and see her friend Jacob Black. She slammed the door to her truck and made her way down the path to Jacob's garage.
Jacob was hunched over the hood of his car working on the motor. His shirt lay in a heap in the corner of the garage like he peeled it off his back and threw it there. When he heard footsteps enter the garage he slowly lifted his head, hoping not to bump it on the hood that was perched up with a part of a metal frame. When he looked over to where the footsteps were coming from he saw Bella and smiled at her. It was pretty obvious that her liked her a lot…or at least he thought so anyway.
She approached him, looking a bit weary for wear and like she could burst out into tears at any given moment. The feeling in Jacob's heart was to pull her to him and just hug her. Tell her that he'd be a better man for her, but he knew very well that say that would set her off…again.
"Hey Jake." She tried to smile, but it was weak and he could tell.
Who cared anymore what she thought about this. He just grabbed her arm and pulled her towards him and hugged her tightly. He couldn't bear to see her like this but he knew it would eventually pass. Hopefully. As he was pulling back from her he kissed her forehead. "You looked like you needed a hug. Bad."
"Thanks Jake," She let go. "I did."
For about a month after that, every free moment Bella had was spent with him, because he made her feel better and she felt like maybe she could even more on too. After that month she felt like she could smile. Yeah it still hurt but she found it easier to smile when she was with Jacob. Soon she felt in her heart that maybe, just maybe, that she might be falling in love with him. Of course she'd never admit it…at least not right now anyway.
The breeze blew coolly as both of them were huddled together on a blanket o a beach. It was a common one for the kids who lived there on the reserve. The sun was setting behind the clouds, kind of a romantic scene actually and then Jacob spoke, trying to break the silence. This was his chance; this was what he had been waiting for, for a long time. "Bells." He started. She turned her head to look at him, curiosity in her eyes. "You know that I'm the type of person who's not afraid to say what they want, right?"
"Yeah…" she responded, wondering where he was going with this.
"Well Bella…" Jacob started again. "What I really, REALLY want is…you…" Before she could even respond let alone register a response to what he had just said because his warm lips were atop of hers, as he kissed her. Oh how nice they felt she thought. 'No, wait? Whut?' her brain kind of gave out when she felt his tongue begging for entrance into her mouth.
She didn't even realize that she had allowed his tongue to roam her mouth, let alone that it progressed to the point where his shirt was off, she was on her back and he was over her. It was like she went braid dead or something. When she realized this she slowly pushed him away, letting her gain access to some from air.
"Jake…"Her short or breath ness made Jacob smirk. He'd done well. "I-…I don't think I'm ready for this yet…" Bella sat up fixing her dark hair.
"Oh…" Was all that he could say. Maybe she didn't want him at all, he thought.
"I mean, I honestly feel the same way about you…at least I think I do. Anyway, I wouldn't have let it get that far if I didn't or thought so," She thought for a moment, gathering the rest of her thoughts. "But I don't think I'm ready to go that far yet."
"Fair enough." He said leaning back on his hands. He could wait, as long as Cullen didn't get in the way.
The phone rang loudly in the Black household and Billy Black; Jacob's father answered it. He said a quick 'Hello' when he found out it was Bella before yelling "JACOB! BELLA'S ON THE PHONE!" Jacob ran out of his room and to the phone. It had been just over a week since the beach incident happened and since they last talked.
"Hi Bells."
"Jake, I'm ready." She said, a soft sob escaping her lips.
"Bells, what's wrong?" he asked.
"Oh nothing. Just a shitty day at school, that's all." She sighed. "It's fine though."
"All-right…" He said. "I'll see you soon." And he hung up the phone. Jacob ran to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Once showered he got dressed, grabbed his wallet and keys before leaving. When he arrived he let himself in and he could hear Bella yell from upstairs in her room to let him know where she was. He ran up the stairs and when he walked through the door she smiled and said "Hi…" in a dorky tone.
She smiled at her before sitting on her bed. He sat beside her and she scooted a little closer to him and took his hand into hers over her lap. "So…you ready?" she asked.
He wiggled his large hand free of hers for a second and pulled out his wallet from his back pocket. He opened it, seeing a few bills that laid there and then he pulled out a pink condom. "Yup. Ready." He placed it on her beside table, before pulling her closer and kissing her passionately. His tongue once again begged for entrance and this time Bella granted it.
He growled lightly as he moved his lips from hers and slowly down her neck. When his lips hit her collarbone she moaned lightly before pushing him down on the bed, removing his shirt. She looked down at his dark muscles and kissed her way down to his belly button where she started undoing the button and fly on his jeans. She kissed down to the band of his silky black boxers and then went back to his lips. He growled a throaty growl again, this time pushing her back, but with more force then he intended. Taken back a bit she could see in his eyes that he didn't mean to be that rough with her but it was just his nature. What he didn't know was that she kind of liked it.
He fumbled with the buttons on her shirt as he shook with frustration. How was a guy supposed to take this off when it wouldn't co-operate, he thought. Bella nodded at him as a sign to just get it over with. With that, he smiled and just ripped the buttons of the shirt right off, throwing across the room. Her pale skin and white lacy bra exposed in the dimming light of the sun. His smile grew into a grin of happiness and pleasure as she untied her bra from the back and let it drop to the floor.
She went for the button on her jeans but Jacob was kissing her again and she lost track of what she was doing. He started to undo her jeans while he kissed her, never letting his gaze leave her face. He slipped the jeans off of her revealing the matching underwear to the bra. He stopped kissing her long enough to slip the boxers off him and her to take her underwear.
A thought crossed her mind, 'What if Charlie comes home early?' She started to panic a bit. Sensing her panic, Jacob looked at her in confusion. "What are we going to do if Charlie comes home?" She asked. Jacob stood up and walked to the door, naked obviously and closed it and locking it. A smile crossed his face in satisfaction as he crawled back on the bed over her kissing her again.
An hour passed as they continued and still no Charlie. Thank goodness. But there was a creak in the house but they thought nothing of it. The window was shut tight and the curtains closed. It had been a long time since she did that. She always used to hope that Edward would just pop in and scoop her up in his arms and apologize but that was just delusional thinking. She was trying to move on, and she thought maybe that all this would go away if she'd just have sex with Jacob already. I mean she loved him. Wasn't that enough? She pushed those thoughts from her mind because she knew he thought it was enough.
Slowly there was a draft was in the room and she whispered in Jacob's ear. "Just a second. I feel a draft." Jacob lifted himself from her and she grabbed a sheet and wrapped it around her tiny body. She stood up slowly. How is it that after your first time it would hurt this much, even when he wasn't still in her? She slowly walked over to the window feeling a bit better but it still hurt a bit. She pushed that from her mind and saw that the window had been opened. She was sure they closed and locked it. She closed it and locked it again and was turning around to finish up with Jacob but when she turned around she ran face first into Edward's hard chest. She looked at him with a confused look on her face, like he was a mirage or something. She tried to walk past him but when she saw the look on Jacob's face, she knew that she wasn't imagining him. She slowly turned on her heel.
"Edward…" She started. Oh shit. He was going to be furious. He can't blame her for anything though, considering it was him who left her in the fucking woods crying, hurt and broken inside.
Jacob started to rise from the bed with one of the other sheets. He went to grab his crumpled up boxers off the floor, constantly giving a nasty glare at Edward. Man did he ever hate that guy, especially since he hurt Bella so much. He slipped them on under the sheet and then removed the sheet, showing his sweaty but toned body.
Edward wrinkled his perfect nose in disgust. He hated this guy so much; there were no words to describe it. "Nice to know you're moving on and along with out me." he snickered at her and she could feel the venom of his words attack her heart.
"Hey!" Jacob yelled at him. "If you weren't such a selfish asshole she'd be with you. Thank God you are because she's with me now. If you've got a problem with it, take it somewhere else. I'm the guy who takes care of her, loves her and most of all tries not to hurt her and leave her feeling broken." He was getting fired up as his blood pumped in his body. "I'm pretty sure that after what has just happened here, it's pretty obvious considering I'm the one that was in her bed. Not you."
"If she didn't care about you so much I would have ripped out your throat already. I think that's sufficient and clearly shows how much I love and care about her if you ask me." His eyes were angled in a glare and Bella noticed they were a soft caramel that usually made her melt and feel weak at the knees. "I respected her enough not to. That and I have morals." After those words left, it was like a slap in the face to Bella. She had wanted this just as much as Jacob and now she was being insulting because of it.
"If you TRULY loved her you would have never left her. Ever. I was here when you were off doing hell knows what." He growled angrily. "Plus, she's the one who called me up for this little rendezvous."
Bella sat on her bed clearly torn before wailing, "Will you guys stop this!" She just about burst out into tears; she would if they kept going at it like this. It hurt with every fiber of her being to hear what was going on between the two. Edward rushed to her side holding her hand but she pulled it away. A smirk crossed Jacobs face as he saw her pull away. Her heart started to beat quickly. She couldn't hold it in anymore she just broke down, sliding to the floor and crying. With a thud she landed hard on her ass.
Jacob came and sat beside her. "Are you alright?" he asked softly in her ear. She shook her head 'no' and he placed his arm around her shoulder and pulling her into a hug. "You know I love you right Bells. With everything that I am, everything I'll be. I promise I'll be the better man for you. That's a promise I'll risk everything for, even if it means my life."
Edward rolled his eyes. "That's exactly what will happen if you try and take her away from me." Then he turned to Bella, "You know perfectly well Bella, that this nothing is no match against me." He snarled. "But, if you want me gone I will leave, for you because I love you and it's better to have loved and lost then never love at all."
"Neither of you are settling this like that." As torn as she was she knew she had to make a choice. She knew she did and she also knew that both boys were so selfless. "Both of you. Downstairs, and please no killing each other. I'm going to get dressed and while I do I'll think about what I'm going to do. Know this, I don't want either of you out of my life." She wiped her eyes of the tears on the sheet.
Both of the boys stood up and Jacob grabbed his clothes, following Edward who was unlocking the door out. Jacob took a detour and went to the bathroom to get dressed. When he was done he went to the living room of the Swan household and sat at the couch in front of Edward. He let his mind wander in the thoughts of the sex with Bella. They were all over each other.
"Will you stop that please?" Edward asked, trying to stay calm.
"Stop what?" Jacob asked, genuinely confused.
"Replaying the robbery of Bella's virginity." His eyes went cold as he glared at him. "It's utterly disgusting how you're visualizing that."
Shock showed on Jacob's face. How the fuck did he know what he was thinking. Whatever it was it was creepy. "Then don't watch. It was enjoyable and you're probably just jealous that it didn't happen to you."
"I would if I could turn it off, and like I said, I have morals."
Back up in Bella's room she grabbed her clothes off the floor and placed them on her bed. She took each piece and put them only slowly giving her longer to thing.'I hope they're not killing each other down there.' she thought. 'I don't hear any crashing, so that's good. I just don't know who I want to be with. I did admit to Edward how much he meant to me before he left…but I just gave something away that I can't get back to Jacob. I really do love both of them, and maybe Edward more than Jacob, but I shared something special with Jake.' She sighed putting on her last piece of clothing. She started walking down the stairs toward the living room.
Edward stood up from the couch watching the stairs to see her come down them elegantly. Still a little sore she looked at both of them and Jacob stood up too. Her eyes a little red from crying earlier she walked into the living room.
"So…" Jacob said, slightly impatiently.
Bella looked to the ground. "I'm sorry Edward."
Edward nodded slowly, feeling defeated as a grin slipped onto Jacob's face. "It's quite alright. I should have known. I'm sorry for causing you so much trouble and pain." And with that Edward walked out the door of the house and disappeared.
Within a minute Charlie opened the door. "Oh, hi kids." He said hanging up his belt on the rack. "What were you guys up to? You look like you guys were wrestling or something and you also look half dead too." He walked into the kitchen.
"Nothing dad. Just wild day." Bella responded before sitting on the couch where Jacob collapsed beside her.
"I love you." He whispered in her ear.
"Yeah…me too." She said slightly distracted, thinking about if she had made the wrong decision. No she couldn't have. She slept with him. She loved him.
He took her hand. "I know. I also know that was hard for you. Thank you though."
"Mhmm." She responded. "I'm tired." She finally said after a moment of silence. "Dad. I forgot to make supper."
"It's quite alright kiddo. I'll order in. I'm just glad to see you're happy. You look like you had a rough day."
"Yeah." Was all she could say before laying her head on Jacob's muscled shoulder and swiftly drifting to sleep.