Chapter 15

Justin P.O.V.

Of all the times I have heard people say it I do not understand how people can say Brian is a cold hearted son of a bitch. He has always been more then considerate to me.

I will say though when we are alone he is a different man but I love both of them. The hard ass that everyone sees is amazingly strong and passionate. The caring and gentle man that I only get to see is just perfect he is tender and considerate of any of my needs.

I can hear Brian in the bathroom washing his hands in preparation of taking care of my wounds. I zone out thinking about numerous things.

I think about how much time he spent with me after the bashing helping me become a whole man again. He did so many different things to help me remember anything that I know were painful for him.

After I finally did remember something he treated me so precious like I would break. He made love to me all night long and reintroduced me to the wonderful joys of being touched by him.

I think about the first time he ever really fucked me; the fast hard pounding of his cock into me in the shower the thought still sends shivers down my spine just thinking about it. It is amazing how his cock can do so many different things and still be the same appendage.

It is not like he has the most beautiful cock that feels wonderful no matter nor is it he has the experience that rivals a porn star. It is everything; the way Brian makes you feel like there is no one else in the world at that moment and no one as special.

Honestly everything thing that consists of Brian Kinney, the enigma, is amazing; unfortunately no one bothers to get to know who he really is. Even his closest friends only see him as the man that can fuck anything that moves.

Nobody bothers to get to know the man that refused to give up his parental rights, there are so many layers to Brian and it seems as I am the only who cares.

"So are you ready to have me wrap you up?"

Grant it I hate that I got interrupted from my musing but then again it was by the real man. How lucky can I possibly be so lucky to have that man caring about me?

I just simply nod my head and he sits next to me on the sofa. I notice that he has changed into a pair of joggers and it is one of the hottest outfits for him.

I'll never forget the very first time I ever saw him. I knew with in that first second that Brian was truly the most beautiful man I ever set my eyes on.

In between his slightly muscled chest and his perfectly proportioned body I knew he was the man I wanted forever. His facial features rival those of a Greek god. His firm cheek bones that off set his lush lips and the not too broad nose, perfection.

I am thankful to all of those above that for whatever reason Brian fell in love with me. I mean by any means I am a small, weak, and not worth a shit but for some reason he loves me.

"Jus where are you? I was telling you it would probably hurt and if it gets too bad just let me know? Are you worried about how badly treated Michael?"

"No Brian just the opposite. I was thinking about what a wonderful man that you are and how lucky I am that you fell in love with me."

"How could I not, you are everything I have ever dreamed of. You are my angel; so innocent and yet so strong. The bravest man I have ever seen who refused to lay down for anything or anyone. I wish I had half the strength that you have; if I did maybe I would be a better person."

"I used your strength Bri if it wasn't for you I would still be living at home being afraid of my homophobic father and following his ridiculous rules. Don't ever doubt yourself Brian ever."

I look at Brian and I see a tear running down his face. His face is so open the mask no longer in place; he is letting me see past all the bullshit. How different I think my world would be if I never went down to Liberty Ave that own fateful night.

I thumb away his tear and he gives me a small smile. At that moment I just think that maybe everything might be okay that maybe it will work out in the end for us.

I just need to feel him, to feel connected to the man I love. I pull his face forward towards mine and I can see fireworks the second our lips meet. Just like the first time I confirm that Brian is the man will spend the rest of my life with.

I push my tongue into his mouth, when our tongues connect I feel as though my soul is complete. Our kiss is not hurried or forced it isn't about foreplay or the first step of sex. It is our way of simply saying our words of love without having to verbalize them.

We have always been able to speak through body language and today is no different. Words have failed us on different times so some times we just have to by pass all the bullshit.

Our kiss is just starting to pick up intensity when we hear the phone ringing off the hook. I pull away from Brian's lips and he just looks at me like I just took his candy away from him.

"Should you answer that?"

"No fuck whoever it is, I don't care."

"Bri what if it is Sally?"

"Then she will leave a message."

Brian pulls me back and our kiss resumes once again with more intensity behind it. God I want him so much, I don't think I have ever wanted anyone as much as I want him right now. His mouth is intoxicating and his tongue is a drug that I will never get enough of.

The ringing stops and the answering machine picks up. We can hear Ben screaming through the machine and I just bust out laughing. Brian pulls back and just quirks an eyebrow.

"With a mouth like that you cannot call him Zen Ben anymore."

After I finish saying that Brian starts his own bout of laughing his ass off. We enjoy our laugh for we know it will be one and few in between. When our giggles, yes we giggled, started to die down Brian stood up and held out his hand.

I clasp his hand and he helps me stand up; I am glad he reached out, for no other reason then to touch. We walk into the bedroom and we just stare at the bed with both of our minds racing with different thoughts.

I know I what I want to do but it is impossible for the next couple weeks. Ethan and his friends made sure I was good and torn. It is not that I want to have rough sex with Brian but I do want to feel connected to him.

Even if Brian was to bottom my ribs are just killing me so therefore no thrusting. So what is a horny, gay boy to do?

I un-wrap my towel and I sit on the bed. I pull Brian's hips towards me as I slowly peel his pants away. When the elastic band catches on Brian's hard cock, I can't help but smile.

I look into his eyes and I can tell that he is embarrassed by the situation. As I keep dragging Brian's pants down his lush cock, it bounces free it is just inches away from my mouth, which literally starts to water wanting to taste him. Even after everything that has happened to me I still want to do these things.

"You don't have to Justin not if you are not ready. I mean I do not mind waiting for however long it takes."

"I want to taste you Brian I want to feel you again. I need to feel the sense of normalcy that I only get when I am with you."

I wrap my lips around his lush, thick, delectable cock and I begin to suck. I inhale him like a lifeline, just the taste and his wonderful musky scent that is Brian Kinney almost sends me over the brink.

I do not know what Brian does but he is intoxicating. Every bit of him is a delicious new drug and with each new part I get lifted into a new plane of ecstasy.

All the things I have been worried about are all gone, every concern and every thought are all gone now that I am touching him. Brian is amazing man as he does not want to rush me into anything I do not want to do. Just like he has done on numerous occasions he just sits back and allows me to enjoy his body at my own pace.

Just like the first time my tongue ever touched his body he has always given me free reign. I think that is half the reason I know every inch that will give him pleasure since I have already discovered it. How else would he know that right above his left elbow would make him instantly hard?

As my tongue curls and licks over his fat delicious head I can hear him grunt out the first sign that he will be cumming soon. I am actually surprised he would be ready so quickly, but I go along the sensations in my mouth.

He is moaning so loud that I can feel his body trembling. I truly get a sense of pleasure when I hear, see, smell, or taste him orgasm. He is completely animalistic when he reaches his peak and just knowing that I did that to him pushes me over the brink.

Brian's body slacks and normally he would steady himself on my shoulders but tonight he just sways a little. He gets out of my line of impact before he flops on the bed.

"I never thought I would ever feel that again. Even in my wildest dreams it never felt as good as it just did."

"Me either sunshine. I just was wondering a couple things though?"

Bri turns on his back waiting for me to crawl up to meet him. I slowly make my way into his arms and once they are completely wrapped around me he continues.

"Did he hurt you internally I mean... fuck did he tear you?"

"I don't think it was Ethan but one of his friends did; yes I have four stitches. Does that disgust you?"

"No nothing about you would ever disgust me. I was just wondering if the damage was only on the outside that's all."

"Brian can I ask you something?"

"Sure baby anything you want."

"If this never happened, Ethan doing this to me, do you think you would still fell this way about me? I mean it took this situation for you to tell me you loved me. Would you have said it if I came back to you on a normal circumstance?"

"Yes I know I would have. I know if you stayed with him any longer I was about ready to knock down his door and tell you everything. It was eating me up inside not telling you.

"I wanted to tell you so many different times but I was afraid because the night I wanted to tell you the first time, with no orgasm involved, was on prom. I felt since, in my mind, it got you hurt."

"You know that is ludicrous even for you Brian. Your love isn't dangerous, just look at how much you love your son."

I can feel his chest rise as he sighs heavily. I know this conversation is a lot longer then I anticipated considering I honestly did not think he would answer me.

"Jus it is because of you that I am even capable saying that yes I love my son. If you weren't around I would have never realized how much the kid meant to me. Hell before you I figured that since my own parents couldn't love me or I them then how anyone or anything could matter to me."

So wow Brian is opening up himself up to me and I love that he is finally being honest. I wonder how much he is going to reveal to me. I'll just have to wait and see. His fingers are running through my hair and I feel safe and loved something I haven't been in a long time.

"Did you know that the first night I saw you under the lamp post I thought you were an angel. A figment of my imagination because someone as beautiful as you could not be made by man. Only a god could have made someone as perfect not even the most famed painting could rival the gracefulness of your features."

In between Brian's voice, his steady heart beat, and his fingers in my hair I can feel myself drifting off to sleep. His words of love lull me into a wonderful dreamland.

"I was drawn to you and even though I forced myself to look away I couldn't. I would not stop until I heard your voice to confirm that I had been blessed enough to know that God finally answered all my prayers for the perfect man. The first syllable ever spoke from you I knew right away that you were the one. I fought so hard to push you away for I was afraid of what you meant and stood for.

"Our first night together when you told me you were a virgin I felt as if I would explode. You were everything I have ever imagined of the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. You are pure, untouched, and smitten with me. When I said I loved you that first night I truly meant it..."