Forward and Author's Notes

PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS (below):

This fic contains: Strong language, violence, murder, systematic child abuse, gladiatorial combat, organized crime, debt slavery, one or two drug-abuse references, and plenty of references to the intimacy between Spark-brothers (that's "twincest" for thick-headed readers). If you don't think you can read about any of this and keep a cool head, I would suggest that you don't. I'm probably going to get flames as it is.

This fic does NOT contain: Graphic rape, perverted sexual fantasies, "squishy" smut, gallons of tears, suicidal thoughts, unfiltered angst, or ridiculous amounts of suffering shamelessly drawn out for dramatic effect. There's been enough of all of the above in Twins-centered fics already. If you're looking for it, I can recommend some authors that might be more to your tastes.

If you can stomach the first list and won't feel too deprived by lack of anything on the second list, please read on. I love feedback, even criticism. Feedback on characterization and realism is especially welcomed.

(This continuity is somewhat AU, though largely G1-based. It's a personal canon, so if you don't understand the foundries or Betas or the Syndicate or any of the other terms/concepts made up for the continuity, just ask. I'll probably post a glossary in one of these chapters. Long Author's Note is long enough already, and it's time to get to the fic.)

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The Unauthorized Autobiography

Hey, Sideswipe here. I'm gonna tell you a little story. It's not a happy story, though I guess you might say it has a happy ending, so don't expect puppies and rainbows. I'm only telling it because my stubborn brother refuses to say a word in his own defense, and I don't know any other way to explain for him. Maybe this will give certain people some perspective, and I won't have to make so many excuses anymore. So, in a way I guess this is selfish. I'm tired of making excuses.

Currently, Sunstreaker is sedated under guard in the repair bay after almost completely slagging Ironhide. When I say slagging, I mean he had his hand around 'Hide's Spark-core and was that close to ripping it out in one smooth motion, a move I've seen him pull off more times than I care to. I'm not sure if he stopped himself in time or just offlined before he could finish. (I hope for the former, but the latter is far more likely.) There are a dozen witnesses who say that Ironhide provoked the fight and escalated it, and the security cameras tell the same story, so no one's talking execution... but I've heard the word "exile" a couple times. And if we get thrown out of the Autobots, trust me, we've got nothing left, my brother and I.

I tried to tell Sunny this when they let me in to visit him, but I wasn't a bit surprised what he said when I told him they'd asked me if I would speak in his defense. "Don't say a damn thing, Sides," he slurred, with his optics cracked and face all mangled. "Ugly hunk of weld an' bolts got what he deserved... do the same thing again if I have to. Tell 'em to go scrap themselves." He was half-coherent anyway, but I know he doesn't like to talk about any of the things that happened before we met Prowl and ended up with the good guys. So he meant it. And I know he'll be pissed that I didn't listen.

But, Sunny... they should know. They can't judge us fairly unless they know. Besides, they deserve to know this stuff. They've been good to us, most of them, and they don't keep secrets or have big blank spots in their records because they can't trust each other. We should be able to trust them by now. So I'm sorry, bro, but I'm gonna fill in the blanks for them, and let them judge, and I hope you can forgive me.

Prowl, buddy, you get to read this first. I think you can decide better than me if Prime or anybody else needs to see it. You've already earned our trust, even Sunny's (though he won't admit it). And this is probably the only time I'll ever be completely honest and serious with you, so you'd better be paying attention. I can only tell you what I remember, and there's some stuff Sunny's even managed to keep from me, but I think I can remember enough.

Man, this stuff hurts. I hate Spark-baring. Alright, Sides, you can do this. It all starts with two protoforms, one Spark, and the one place on Cybertron so ugly even Megatron thought it needed a serious revision...