Hey there. So, hate me if you dare but I've decided to edit and pick up this story. I've beat myself up over leaving you all but I'm back. I've finished the story, now all I must do is upload the content.

I've changed quite a bit so it would probably be best for you to read it all again and see the changes. Too many to mention (as in, I can't be bothered to think about them all.) Enjoy! x

BPOV

It's always weird the first day back. Always different, but always the same. It's uncomfortable believing that maybe something just might actually happen this year, fearing the change but bored with routine. I guess that all comes with being a teacher. I often question my motive for returning to this God-forsaken place, especially when my high school experience was far from perfect.

For some reason, I'd allowed myself to be diluted with the notions that high school was: party, friendships, first loves, party. Far from it, I say. Far from it.

Thanking the gods for the opportunity to get organized and plan yesterday (and my brilliant efficiency skills), I'd made sure that I arrived just moments before the bell - you know, avoid pointless conversation with the rest of the staff. Not that they were horrible, just that today would be.

"Hey Bella," I turned to see Jasper's sexy smile and my breath (involuntarily) hitched. Poor form, Bella. The casual I'd secretly crushed on over the past three years now stand before me, looking as brilliant as ever.

Beautiful - it is what it is. Blonde hair, blue eyes, amazing facial features that always made him seem inhumanly breath-taking; my teutonic knight by day and.. well, night if you'd go that far. Of course, he'd shown up in formal attire but I remember that day, oh so clearly, I saw him in nothing but work out shorts and a tank that clung to his muscles. God, did he look good.

"How was your break?" I asked, flashing a smile in return. We walked towards the staff room and a group of ditzy, annoying girls giggled as he passed. I could hardly persecute them for turning into mush, though - I understood exactly how they felt.

Becoming quick friends as we both started in Logan High, we'd discovered many of the mechanisms that would get us through high school (again). Ignoring their blatant ogling was one of them.

"It was awesome," he continued. "I took Alice to that restaurant you suggested last week, after spending the first half in New York with her and her family. It was fantastic. Very diverting, you should visit some day."

Damn it. I should never have suggested that stupid restaurant! At the time, it hadn't made sense as to why is he was telling me about it. I though I made it obvious enough, but still he talked about her, Alice, as thought it hadn't effected me; as if it didn't hurt. I eventually had to face the facts; Alice Brandon would be his wife.

"Bella," He stopped walking and said my name gently. So softly that it made me feel that weird sensation, "I'm going to propose to Alice."

I stopped walking, paralyzed. Broken.

He's going to propose! He's going to propose? He's going to propose. To Alice.

Thoughts circulated in my head, most of them about the clues; the ones that even slightly hinted at the chance of a proposal. To her.

For the past 3 years that I'd known Jasper, I'd hoped for my chance. My chance to be the one those muscular arms held at night, my chance to kiss those lips, just my chance. For three years, Jasper had become a great friend and, despite the cheesy cliche, I'd fallen.

I had to realise in that moment: it was over even before it's started.

He must have read into my silence as I felt his gaze still so heavy on me. I turned to face him and forced a smile, "Oh, I'm so happy for you guys." Forced.

"Me too," That smile appeared on his face again, and I couldn't help the real, genuine one I had this time. Regardless of my 'heartbreak' I was happy for him. I might not have been at the time, but at least I thought I was. To see him happy should've made me happy. But I wasn't. It sucked to lose a crush and, finding out wasn't even the worst part, moving on kills.

"So, how are you going to do it?" I asked.

He explained how he was to propose and I couldn't help but think, "Oh he is so romantic" but each time those thoughts came into my head, they quickly vanished as the louder voice screamed out "Not you! Never you."

They're going to that restaurant they first met, "Mozarts," then to that tree in the middle of the park where they shared their first kiss, do a little star gazing and as she looks up, a dozen large heart-shaped balloons with the words 'will you marry me?' will floating in the sky. That's when he'll pop the question.

"That's so romantic Jasper." I said, faking excitement as I gave him a hug.

I stayed for a second too long but I couldn't help myself. Hugging Jasper just felt right. Even worse then, because I knew he's going to propose to Alice, one of my greatest friends. Did I mention that? Alice. One of my greatest friends.

One of my best friends.

I should've been happy. God, I should've been. But I couldn't help the little wish that I never introduced them. At the time, I thought nothing of it; Jasper's a flirt - a good one at that, but then so is Alice. I didn't expect them to click.

"I'm telling you this because you're the closest "girl friend" that I have," he said, obviously not picking up my false act.

I laughed, trying to hide the sardonic tone, "Thanks, Jazz. It will be perfect." I desperately needed to shift the conversation, "You ready for this new year?"

He laughed and reflected my exact sentiments. No.

We spent the rest of the morning, fifteen minutes, talking about the break. He asked about my summer beach visits, I laughed sarcastically. I asked about his overseas trip to Australia, his eyes lit up. The conversation, smooth and light, then hit a wall when he brought up James. Oh, him.

Define "steady relationship." Now take that and times it by fifty - that what James thought of it. We'd only been seeing each other for two weeks before the holidays, never really taking it to the next level, and he seemed about ready to propose. It's not that he was terrible, it's just that he missed something that Jasper (or anyone really) had; personality.

I stared at the man before me and thought 'this was why I never took it to the next level.' It was all because of Jasper, talking about Lord knows what and getting ready to propose to one of my best friends.

This crap is called my life, people.

The bell rang, interrupted our conversation and indicated the start to .. shit.

"I'll see you later then Bella."

"Bye Jasper," I sighed. When he was out of earshot, I whispered dramatically, "I love you." Okay, so that was an exaggeration on my part but, hey, moving on from a crush was difficult. Been there? Then don't judge.

The PA announced, "All ninth and tenth grade students meet in the hall as the bell rings. All year nine and ten meet in the hall. Thank you."

Of course, the "beginning of year speech" - Kevin. He'd felt it necessary to gather the freshmen and sophomores, creating a clear distinction between them and the juniors/seniors who were to not be messed with. It's true. Teachers hate the little shits until they mature, that usually takes two to three years of waiting. Years!

Heading to roll call, I'd realised how much I detested it. I never really knew why. I suppose today just made me find new things to hate.. Possibly.

"Hey Miss Swan!" I heard that annoying, nasal voice call. Natalie.

It's not that I found her annoying. No, she liked to keep me company. It's just that voice; it killed me.

I'm such a bitch. How I ever got into teaching, I'll never know.

I merely smiled and was happy to see that that half of my homeroom wasn't here.

"How were your holidays?" She asked this every time we came back from break. I could tell that each time that she was genuinely interested, and each time I would tell half truth, half of it... not so much.

Natalie was a brilliant listener. She sighed at the right times, gasps and laughs in the right places. I guess I don't mind talking to Natalie; there are just some student-teacher codes that should never be breached. Unfortunately, I was reminded of one as she asked the next question.

"So, how's your boyfriend?"

"I don't have a boyfriend, and if you're talking about James - he's not," I said with a little more acid in my tone than intended. Luckily Natalie picked it up and stopped pressing. The real reason for my harshness was because she knew the truth about my "little crush" on Jasper - I swear, sometimes it just comes out like water. Like I'm drunk and have no inhibition.

"How's... Mr Hale?"

Thankfully, the bell rang. I gave her a sarcastic fake smile and ushered her out of class. The bell wasn't a dismissive one for her - No, it's more like a warning.

I headed for the door and Nat followed me (talk about teacher's pet much), I locked the door and successfully shooed her off.

Glancing down at my next class-list, I saw the lining up; the perfect sophomore English unit. Silently, I cheered as I saw Ashley Cullen - charismatic class president, over-achiever, athlete and an all round stellar person. I'd watched her grow significantly from her freshman year and, honestly, believed myself so grateful for being able to invest into such a gem. I know they say favourites don't exist - they are definitely highly frowned upon - but Ashley was everyone's favourite! Unfortunately, all knew it. But her.

I smile as I see the other names, including Lionel her cousin, and realise that someone did love me up there. Great people, great vibes - setting my day up for a win. Hey, with all the things that we teachers are subjected to, class matters.

Five minutes later, a group gathered out my door and I'd caught some of the conversation going on. Unintentionally, of course.

"Umm, Paris, he's my uncle," laughed Ashley.

Following that was a round of squeals and giggling. I knew that they were discussing a new 'pursuit'... Crass.

"Morning all. Sophomore year, guys. It's time to step up your game and, luckily," I smiled sarcastically, "You guys are stuck with me for English."

Feeling sorry for these suckers, pressured to look into colleges at 16, I'd decided that it may be time to loosen the reigns. Just a little. According to Ashley, I'd been pretty good at maintaining order.. "for a young, English teacher, that is." Truth be told, despite the crap I pay out about high school, I'd seen enough of the world to understand that teaching was the only thing that I'd ever feel inclined to pursue - changing the world one mindset at a time.

The class went by smoothly, with occasional laughs, but there was something that the girls were trying to pass along. I noticed that every time a girl would look at another they would smile, then pass it along to another and laugh, then smile again. Oh, the chaos of giggling girls.

As the lesson was coming to a close I'd decided to ask the girls what the "big news" was.

Sometimes, when I'm not pissed off, they'd tell me (though I wouldn't even ask if I was) and today I hadn't felt like I treated their class strictly- if anything, I was quite chirpy despite the shit of this morning.

"So, Paris... what were you screaming about before class, you know when we were lining up?" I asked nonchalantly.

The whole class erupted in laughter as if I'd said the best joke ever. I then realised that Paris had gone beet red.

"Ashley? Care to explain?" I never usually ask her stuff directly in class, only when we're alone chatting, but I really wanted to know. She was practically shaking with laughter.

"I want to know what joke I'm missing out on," I said, laughing along with them. Most of the girls in the class giggling, and the guys, if not howling with laughter, being who they were, just made fun of them.

Lionel poked fun, "Looks like Paris has moved on from Mr Hale! He's all your now Miss." The class laughed harder at this, and I suddenly, involuntarily tensed up. But of course, they hadn't known.

"What's going on?" I asked for the third time.

This time Ashley looked at me and smiled, "Don't worry Miss, I think you'll find out soon enough and Paris won't be the only one 'moving on from Mr Hale"

I never told Ashley about Jasper, not because it seemed inappropriate to do so, but because I always thought of her as my laughing buddy; that was until last term when I saw her cry for the first time, the only time I ever remember comforting a student. It was a nice feeling, knowing that you could be there for a younger lady - God, do I remember the terrors of my high school drama.

The bell rang and I saw Ashley slap Lionel on the arm as they walked out; laughing and poking fun, the best cousins I'd ever seen.

"Edward doesn't like that remember! That's why he moved from the other school, you douche bag."

Second period was a bore, as always. I had the other 10th grade English and they were no fun compared to the previous lesson.

It was dead quiet - too quiet for the first day and for a sophomore class. Trying to liven up the mood - you know, create a positive teacher-student relationship - and set up a new standard for the year, I asked, "So do you know what's going on with the other girls?"

Staring at them now, my previous notions of them being scared of me was reaffirmed. When they all retreated and hushed quietly amongst themselves, I gave a defeated sigh. How's that for a contrasting technique..

"So, what does a sonnet consist of?" I continued. They're obviously not going to tell me so I thought that I might as well get on with the lesson.

It was the last 5 minutes and, unlike the other class, we actually powered through the class for the first day. I was ready to tell them to stop being so serious. Out of nowhere one of the girls asked me something that shocked the whole class.

It's not normal for this class to speak without raising their hand, even weirder for them to ask questions like these.

"Miss, have you fallen for Mr Cullen aka 'Mr Sex: O.M.G touch me' yet?" She asked loud but hesitantly.

I laughed, not because of the question, but because the whole class stared at her as though she were delusional. Oh no. How dare she ask that? They would think. Does she not realise that Miss Swan is a teacher? They would ask. Oh no. The outrage; diving into personal, conversational questions. How dare she?

After I stopped laughing the bell went and I was glad because, honestly, if that was the reaction to one man, I felt compelled to suss it out. The last time all the girls went crazy was over Jasper. Still, there weren't this many.

He can't be that great, can he?

Just as I began to lock the door, I heard someone call out to me. It was a familiar voice. Ashley. I turned at the sound of my name and saw a red-faced Ashley. "Yeah?" I always try to sound professional with the students but there are some, Ashley and Natalie, that made me ditch all the formalities.

She was taking in deep breaths but finally spoke, "I left something important in your class."

I'm not going to lie, I was intrigued. Realising she'd have answers to both matters of my interest, I opened the door again, hoping that maybe in this time, I'd be able to ask some questions and "investigate." We spent about a minute looking for it, unsuccessfully. When I gave up, I sat on my desk, which I don't usually do, and started to shoot questions at her.

"Who is this Mr Cullen?" I asked firstly, wanting to fill in the blank spaces.

"He's... a teacher," She said hesitantly, too deeply concentrated on the floor.

I was frustrated by the answer and scrunched my face, imagining how I must've look to a student. I heard her laugh; yes, I probably looked like that six year old brat in the store with a shut down request.

We looked at each other for a moment, trying to stare the other down.

I caved in first. I had to stop and think about how this situation must've looked to a passer-by. We both laughed and walked out of the room, still chuckling about the random events that just occurred.

"I think you're the craziest student out, Ashley." I finally said.

"So do I." She said. Then she thought about what I said and gasped which only made me cackle. I know she did that as a dramatic effect but it was funny.

It was just so casual with her, and the student-teacher connection established over the years had become more a friendship than the expected professional. Walking and talking with her had often been imprinted in my mind as some of the craziest moments at school. Sometimes, being the klutz that I am, I would trip on air. She would casually brush it off as I remind her of the epic fall in front of the entire peer group.

"Not cool, Swan."

Then came those sporadic, albeit arbitrary, deep and meaningful moments. I recall the first time was at the 9th grade retreat - the 'get to know your high school peers' compulsory 3 night getaway. All the fun and games aside, we were delegated into a small group of five and it was my first personal encounter with Ashley Cullen. I hadn't even known her properly and was stunned by the maturity and wisdom, for a 14-year-old, and her desire to place value on people. It was a fresh reminder of why I do what I do for a living.

The reason I probably could connect to Ashley is because there were so many similarities between us; same outlook of life, same stance, same mannerisms, taste in music..

What also struck me at the retreat was the way Ashley, despite her beauty, didn't conform to the world of 'beautiful people' - you know, the one where those with the rights features and assets gravitated towards each other and used it to get their way with us, 'common people.' Growing out of her childhood facial features she had still possessed the soft, warm and inviting smile that made people love her. Tall and majestic, graceful in a way, she reminded me of Alice; lithe in her step and confidence in her mannerisms. Her hair was an auburn color and had gentle waves that stopped around the middle of her back, but the greatest feature remained in those deep, green eyes. Those endless orbs. Oh, my God. It was no wonder the guys fall hard for her and all the girls envied her.

Stupidly, I'd fallen into the trap of comparing myself to another. Hold on, to a student. I'd realised how sad I was and wanted to die then and there. Plain Jane. Bella Swan; brown hair, brown eyes, pale and petite.

"You're in deep, deep, deep, thought," She observed, waving her hands around like a gypsy with premonition.

"Well, I have to go into deep thought when you're around. Your words confuse me sometimes." I said, truth in the statement.

"Hey, I can't help it if my words are just fundamental misconceptions designed to void individuality." She laughed.

I raised an eyebrow in challenge.

"Well, I should enlighten you. I think you may have forgotten that, as an English teacher, I have skillfully mastered the art of turning a simple message into a profound statement, with the use of overcomplicated notions. Your words, though sophisticated and mature, have yet to leave me in a state of unfathomable loss." I said, a triumphant grin on my face.

It was then swiped off because she too had a smirk on her face.

"I still know what you do know. I still win."

I huffed, smiled and shook my head. "Can you tell me now?" I asked, reveling in the fact that I had company for the tedious recess duty.

She had a mischievous smile on her face but shook her head.

"You're gay." I said folding my arms across my chest. God, did I feel so young again. Not that I was old or anything, I just felt... younger.

Ashley laughed at my expression and looked ... flabbergasted.

"You just called me gay. You realize that, don't you? Doesn't that breach some student-teacher code of practice or something?"

"Yes. Only because you wouldn't tell me who Mr Cullen is though." I replied through gritted teeth. I chuckled, "And if we were talking about student-teacher breaches, I'm sure I'm long gone."

She mused, "He's just another teacher. He's my uncle so I can't tell you much else because that would feel weird. But why does it matter so much anyway?"

"I, er, just want to know who this 'Mr Sex: O.M.G touch me' is" I said, making quote marks in the air with my fingers. I looked at her disgusted expression and quickly added, "Awkward. Sorry."

After 10 seconds of pause, she broke out into uncontrollable laughter and within moments was clutching to my arm for support. Feeling slightly bemused, I tapped my foot dramatically to give her a hint.

I really wanted to do some investigating before I meet him because if he is as dreamy as every girl made out, then I'd feel much better be prepared. I don't want to make a bad first impression; you know, stuttering, blushing, possible bad flirting. I don't want to make the same mistake and act the way I did when I first met.. Jasper. I want him not to feel superior just because the whole female population is head over heels for him. You know, it's the good-looking-gene syndrome.

Most of these perfect guys turn out to be dicks.

"Done yet?" I asked pointedly.

She shook her head no. I rolled my eyes and asked despite this, "So, Mr Cullen is your uncle?"

She stopped laughing and looked up at me, nodding slowly and hesitantly. "You know, Lionel had to ask me if he was our uncle this morning. He came to a family party over the holidays and Lionel practically spent the whole afternoon playing football with him but when we come back one of the first things he asked me was 'Do we know that guy?'"

I laughed and shook my head at the story. It's such a Lionel thing to do.

"I wouldn't be surprised."

"Oh trust me, I wasn't. Fortunately for us, I was able to tell him before he actually went up to Ed and asked. Which, honest to God, was what he was going to do," She replied, bouncing up and down at the thought of Lionel asking their uncle if they were related.

She diverted the topic and inquired about my holidays- I told her the same story I told Natalie. I just don't like sharing much of my personal life with students. I did however, mention Alice Brandon, who I've never told any student about.

It was only after I'd shared that piece of information had I realised, but it was too late. Ashley had a knowing look on her face and opened her mouth but shut it again, as if to say something, but changed her mind.

"Is that Mr Hale's Alice?" She inquired. I was honestly beyond surprised. It's either Jasper trusts students with his personal life or he hinted that he had a girlfriend so that these girls would drop it. Option two plainly didn't work because I still know of girls that are still chasing him.

My confusion was evident. "Umm, I believe it is. Did, did he tell you about her?"

"Nope." There was no hint of sarcasm in her voice to startled me. I'm sure that Ashley's not crazy enough to stalk him. Actually, thinking about it, Ashley never did obsess over Jasper.

The recess bell rang and I silently cursed the office ladies for letting it go off. I wanted to find out how she'd known about Alice. We started to walk and talk and, begrudgingly, faced the fact that there were still another four classes to go.

Ashley, in deep contemplation said, "We know the Hales. Mr Hale and his sister I mean, Miss Hale. I still think it's so cute how they work together."

"His sister? How?" I questioned, not even attempting to hide my unnatural interest. There was a kind of eagerness in my voice that I couldn't hold back.

She laughed and looked taken aback at her sudden realisation. "I can't believe you didn't know this. I was quite certain that I'd told you. Mr Hale is -"

" - Hey Ashley! I think we have music together. Keen."

Standing in front of the staff room door, I was almost prepared to transfer all my frustration out on Lionel as he interrupted what would've been the most enlightening piece of information. Distracted, Ashley beamed up at me and said, "I'll explain sometime later but I got to go. I'm so screwed if I can't find that no- thing. Oh God, hope he doesn't have it."

Before I could ask what the hell she was talking about, a soft, mesmerizing voice came from behind, "Too late, Ashley Cullen. Too late."

Ashley froze and the shock in her eyes was enough to secretly scare me. "Oh hey, uncle Ed.. er, Mr Mason. This - this is Miss Swan."

The fear in her features turned somewhat cheeky as she looked behind my shoulder with a cunning sparkle in her eyes. I turned around, prepared for what I've been waiting for, but I wasn't prepared for what stood before me.

No way in hell could I prepared for this.

REVU? KTANTU. RUVUROAL.