Keep this thought in mind as you read: If Draco were Muggle, he'd be a rocker.

Thank God for Jack Black.

So Hermione thought as she sat in her parents' basement with Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Draco Malfoy, watching School of Rock. The adventures of Dewy Finn as he transformed stuck-up prep school students into a rock band were enough to keep them laughing--and from thinking about the terrifying new world they would have to live in.

But it wasn't easy. Since Voldemort won the war, it was difficult to think about anything else. Soon he would find them--a Mudblood, a blood traitor, a renegade Death Eater, and the Boy Who Lived--and kill them all. But until then, School of Rock kept these melancholy thoughts at bay.

For a while.

As the credits rolled across the screen, Hermione turned off the movie. "So...what'd you think?"

Harry grinned. "Awesome!"

"Hilarious," Ron added.

"Inspiring."

Everyone stared at Draco. "How so?" Hermione asked.

He stood. "Come ON--don't tell me I'm the only one who saw this!"

"Well, since you're not telling us what it was, then yes, you're the only one who saw it," Ron said.

Draco sighed. "We're all able to play an instrument, right?" The others agreed. "Well, rock is all about stickin' it to the man, and we all know who 'The Man' is, right?"

"You-Know-Who," Harry said.

"Exactly."

"In case you haven't noticed," Ron said, "he's trying to kill us."

The little group was silent for a moment. Then Draco went to the other end of the den where he, Ron and Harry slept and kept their belongings, grabbed his Death Eater robes, brought them into the light, and began tearing the sleeves off.

"Um, what are you doing?" Harry asked.

Draco grinned. "I'm gonna go stick it to The Man. You wanna come?"

Six weeks later, the Noon Moon coffee house was packed wall-to-wall with music-loving Muggles. Each carried a program listing the night's acts: a goth rock band called Open Casket Wedding first, followed by solo act Melinda McMains, then Shattered Mask. While most everyone had heard of Open Casket Wedding and Melinda McMains, Shattered Mask had come out of nowhere and mysteriously gotten a gig at the Noon Moon. Half the crowd planned to leave when Shattered Mask took the stage; half planned to stay and see who the heck they were.

When Melinda left the stage, half of the half that planned to leave went with her. The rest stayed as Shattered Mask took the stage: a girl with bushy brown hair artfully touseled and liberally sprinkled with glitter on guitar, a boy with messy black hair on drums, a redheaded boy playing the bass, and a blond boy with a funny-looking tattoo on his left arm singing and playing lead guitar. He grabbed the microphone.

"Hey everyone," he said. "We're, uh, we're Shattered Mask and we're really stoked to be here tonight..."

Scattered cheers from the crowd.

"Okay, uh, listen...there's gonna be a killer light show--literally killer. So if you see a bolt of green light coming towards you, duck..."

The drummer came up to him and whispered something in his ear.

"Oh, right, sorry." He grabbed a stack of hand-held mirrors and began passing them out to people in the audience. "If a bolt of green light comes toward you and you have a mirror, try and reflect it at a really tall guy with red eyes and no nose."

Whispers spread throughout the audience.

"Yeah, he's dangerous, so when you see him, just avoid him. 'Kay? Everyone got that?"

Everyone did. The guitarist grinned. "All right, then, let's rock!"

After the chorus of the first song, almost everyone present decided they liked Shattered Mask. And by the second song, nobody wanted to leave. Which was too bad, because halfway through the second song, Mr. No-Nose came into the Noon Moon. Gasps and a few screams spread throughout the coffee house, but most parted like the Red Sea before the tall and imposing figure.

The band played on. Everything was going according to plan.

No-Nose tried to say something, but it was drowned out by Shattered Mask's music. So he raised a stick, shouted something, and a bolt of green light shot out and headed right for the drummer. The drummer held up a mirror and the light bounced off, headed right for a girl in the audience. She, in turn, held up another mirror and reflected the deadly light onto another mirror, and another, and another, until it eventually broke a window in the back of the Noon Moon.

This agitated No-Nose. He glared at the band and shot another bolt, this one at the lead guitarist. Since he was in the middle of a solo, he ducked and the bolt hit the brick wall beyond the stage. While No-Nose seemed angrier than ever, the guitarist grinned, pulled something from his pocket, and showed it to the auidence.

It was a skull mask.

No-Nose's red eyes widened, and he mouthed something only the band could see. You dare...

The guitarist's eyes glittered as he tossed the mask into the air, withdrew a stick from his other pocket, and shot a bolt of light at the mask. It shattered, scattering pieces throughout the auidence. Although they didn't understand the significance--or why it made No-Nose so angry, they cheered wildly.

From there, the laser light show just got better. No-Nose shot more and more bolts at the band, who reflected them into the audience and let them bounce off mirrors--until one of the bolts hit No-Nose. He collapsed, suddenly still. Everyone was silent, including the band. Suddenly, the blond guitarist began to sing:

Weeeeeee are the champions, my friend...

The rest of the band laughed, and the audience sang along.

Shattered Mask played more than the three songs they'd planned. Called back to the stage for encore after encore, they ended up playing ten. A few of these were covers, but few people cared.

After the show, a man in a suit approached Draco. "Are you the leader of this band?"

"Yeah, I guess so."

He offered his hand, and Draco shook it. "I'm Phil Mullins and I represent Three Bald Guys Records. Although you may not have heard of us, I believe we could be, ah, mutually beneficial to each other."

Hermione, overhearing, grinned. "You're offering us a record deal?"

"Yes. That is, if you're interested. Shattered Mask has just the combination of talent and manic energy that we're looking for. So what do you say?"

Everyone grinned. "Yeah!"

Phil gave them his card, the band packed up their instruments, then piled into the van to go celebrate.

"Well, we defeated Voldemort," Harry said.

"And we got a record deal!" Hermione added.

"Not only that, but we stuck it to The Man."

"While we're all pointing out the obvious, I think there's something we should all be aware of," Ron said.

"What's that?"

He grinned. "We're rock stars."