Disclaimer: If I owned Bleach, it probably would only be out in video, not on T.V, for obvious reasons.
Author's Note: Thanks again to all reviewers, I luvs you all uber much 3. These following three are from KaruKyan! D
I have to say that this chapter is dedicated to the AMAZING author 'The Indigo Schemer', who sent me a hilariously-awesome review (go read So Cold, if you haven't already. It's to die for! ) 33
Prompt – Squishy
Something was dreadfully wrong. But, as all dreadfully wrong happenings in the much feared Hueco Mundo usually are, were strangely hilarious or satisfying, or both.
Gin, unfortunately, had forced all of the Espada (with Aizen and Tousen in tow) to sit down and watch Finding Nemo with the overly-happy ex-captain. And, with the 9th Espada's dismay, Gin created an abnormal fixation with anything 'squishy', which included the shape-shifter's release form.
"But Aaroniero, you are my squishy!" whined Gin while chasing the scared elite hollow, ignoring Grimmjow and Ulquiorra heavily making out in the corner.
Gin, even though one could not distinguish as to how someone would use peripheral vision through eyes so closely squinted, noticed the couple.
Grimmjow, who was currently occupied with pressing every inch of Ulquiorra against the wall, suddenly yelped while clutching his now-molested ass.
Gin stared, his hand still in the 'squeeze' position, and said really loudly, "…squishy."
Ulquiorra began to see red as he chased the laughing ex-captain throughout the palace.
Prompt - Straight Jacket
'Stupid humans. Their existence makes me want to vomit' thought Ulquiorra vehemently. He had accidentally sucked a soul while in his gigai with other humans around him, so to save the hassle of breaking out of jail, he had began to talk about Hueco Mundo to make the authorities think he was one of the 'local users'.
But he forgot the factor of how he was currently dressed; clothing that was kind of rich for a poor druggie that would prostitute themselves.
So the authorities took the wrong idea, thinking that Ulquiorra was indeed a drug user, but also a prostitute working under a pimp of some sorts.
Wanting information, they question Ulquiorra for hours, while he babbled on about 'being a faithful follower of Aizen-sama, and how there are more under his command', which just made the situation worse by leading the police to think there were more prostitutes serving underneath 'Aizen, the Pimp', who was currently the leader of an obviously illegal prostitute ring.
This entire, tiresome background story leads to the current situation; Ulquiorra swearing profusely while being tied up in a straight-jacket in a big, padding-clad room in the middle of the night, with the moon shining down into his prison.
Which all of it ironically resembled Orihime's holding place.
He couldn't cero his way out, he couldn't get out of his gigai, he couldn't negotiate, and he couldn't do ANYTHING. All he could do was roll around on the ground and swear his lungs out, and wait for his drug-induced macaroni and cheese midnight snack to arrive.
"Psh. Who would have thought you would be all trussed up like a present for me, eh? What do humans call this? Christmas?" spoke a husky voice from a darkened corner.
Grimmjow submerged from the darkness, smirking like a bull in a china shop that wanted to bear destruction, while he began stalking toward Ulquiorra. Seeing the lust-filled glint in the 6th Espada's eyes, Ulquiorra tried to scoot in the opposite direction, while chanting one word in a breathless, terrified voice.
"Fuck."
Prompt – Hot Pink
All of the Espada looked incredulously at their uniforms that had just arrived from the wash, still warm from the dryer.
Each and every single item was a hot pink, bearing no sign of the once pure-white uniforms that once were. And each Espada glared at his or her clothes (Ulquiorra almost set fire to it because of his deadly glare), wishing to catch the culprit.
Except for Syazel, who just giggled and pranced around like a little female monstrosity.
"Uhh…what the fuck happened here?" Grimmjow gritted through his teeth.
"No idea, but I have no clean clothes left, so I'll have to put this on..." sighed Yammi.
Ulquiorra held the offending clothing between his thumb and fore-finger, sniffing in distaste. "I refuse to wear these repulsive pieces of trash. Whoever soiled these uniforms shall be severely punished," he said defiantly.
"But Ulquiorra, what if it was I who made them that colour, would you still wear it if I told you to?" said a voice behind him.
Ulquiorra immediately turned around and bowed deeply. "Forgive me, Aizen-sama. I did not mean to offend you. If it is by your word, I shall wear this with honour."
"Psh, suck-up," muttered Grimmjow in the background, but secretly wondered what Ulquiorra would look like in the colour. How would it contrast with the pale Espada's skin? Plus, the 6th Espada's jacket had shrunk, so it would only mean the pants were too. And he wanted to finally be able to see how round and firm the ass of his sexy emo- superior.
After the Espada left to go change into the rest of their new uniforms, Aizen pulled a red thong out from his pocket.
"Gin, let's keep the true reason to this predicament to ourselves."
Gin smiled weakly, then snatched the thong from Aizen's hand and hastily stuffed the raunchy undergarment into his pocket.