"Speaking"

'Thinking'

Chapter 1

The desert is an unforgiving place. It's one of the most desolate biomes on the planet. Their famous mirages have led many a man astray where he has died of starvation or dehydration. Through one particular desert, however, there is a road. A long, straight road with only one turn as a last chance to get off. On this road there is a gas station and for those lucky few who make it there, it is salvation. Cold drinks, hot food, and directions to the one turn await these lucky few. It seems though, that the rode has recently been blocked off with a warning. It's been blocked for a year now, but today three travelers will make it to the station.

A dark blue Lamborghini turned off the desert road and stopped, narrowly avoiding a giant ditch in the middle. The passenger door rose up and a pink stiletto attached to a long pale leg reached out and touched the ground. A petite woman with long orange hair followed. She uncomfortably pulled down the fishnet covering her short bubblegum tube-top and tugged at her equally pink, frilled micro-mini. She shaded her uncovered eye with a hand and looked around.

"Hand me my baby would you?" she asked. An arm covered in the sleeve of a dark blue jacket handed her a bluish chrome mini-bazooka. "Thanks babe. Now hurry your lazy asses up!"

"Yeah, yeah," said a young man as he stepped out and joined the woman. He was tall, lean, and pale. The blue tips at the front of his ice blond, spiked hair matched the blue of his jacket that covered a black button up and white pants.

On the driver's side a tall, muscled, and shaggy haired brunette man had stepped out and was stretching. The bulky material of his blue sweat pants and orange fur collared coat bunched up as he stretched his arms above his head. He unzipped the front of his jacket to reveal a black t-shirt with a red swirl on it. "It's hotter than hell out here!" he exclaimed.

"Yeah, I heard it was seventy back in Tokyo," said the woman.

"Any rain?" asked the blonde.

"Nope, just a bright blue sky."

"A perfect day," he sighed.

"Definitely better than this hell hole," said the brunette.

"Yep, now get your stuff and let's get a move on. She won't wait forever," said the woman.

"Sure she will," said the brunette. "Well, I don't know about you Sakura, but Mom loves me and Sasuke. She'd wait forever. Ain't that right bro?"

Sasuke hned. "I suppose, but with that hair of yours I'm not sure she'll recognize you Naruto."

"Whatever." Naruto laughed and tousled his hair as he moved around to the trunk. He popped it open and took out two 9x19mm handguns and a line of grenades. "Damn. This all you got left Sasuke?"

"Yeah, I used most of them in Berlin. Remember?"

"Oh, right, well let's go before Sakura's forehead explodes."

Sakura longed to beat Naruto to a pulp, but only swung Baby behind her head and trudged along with them silently. The three of them spent an hour walking along the road looking for any signs of the fabled gas station, but it seemed unlikely that there was anything out there but sand and rocks. They were about to classify this venture as yet another dead-end when Naruto was suddenly hit in the head with a nerf ball.

"Ow! What the fuck?" Naruto looked around for his assailant and spotted two astonished looking boys not too far from him. "Hey kids!" He picked up the ball. "This yours?" The boys turned and ran up the road.

"Great job dumbass!" cried Sakura. "Those kids could've lived at the station!" She punched the back of his head.

"Relax Sakura," said Sasuke. "You're probably right and all we need to do is keep walking. They can't live that far away."

"Oh you're so smart Sasuke-kun!"

"Goddamnit what have I told you about calling me that? You see Naruto! I told you we spent way too much time in Japan!" Sasuke stalked off and after a minute or two Sakura and Naruto followed.

Sakura ended up being correct. In just under fifteen minutes the group was standing outside one of the oldest looking gas stations they had ever seen. The three-story whitewash house behind it didn't make it any younger looking either. The whole place looked completely deserted, so the team split up to look around.

After fifteen minutes Sakura and Sasuke were returning from checking out the house when they heard a gunshot. Fearing Naruto was in trouble, they sprinted to the back of the station where he had gone earlier. There was Naruto standing over a dead rattlesnake.

Seeing their peeved faces Naruto chuckled awkwardly. "Sorry guys, false alarm."

Sakura seethed. "Naruto you d-"

"You bastard!" Two young voices cried. The group turned, weaponry at the ready, to see the two boys, now revealed to be twins, from earlier. "You've killed Rattler!" The team relaxed.

"Wow sorry kid. I didn't realize anyone would keep a rattlesnake as a pet. Ow!" Naruto clutched his shin where he'd been kicked.

"That was for Rattler you bitch!" yelled the boy that kicked him.

"Why you little punk! I oughta-"

"You better not lay a hand on either of those boys!" A woman yelled from behind them. The group turned to see a young woman with midnight colored hair and silver eyes, holding a Remington and wearing an old-fashioned floor-length, white nighty.

"Mama they killed Rattler!" cried the other twin.

"Mama can see that Hun, but now's not the time. You two get your butts in there." The boys obeyed and scrambled into the station's main building.

"You fucker!" Naruto turned and began to choke Sasuke in a rage. "I knew you were sleeping with her behind my back!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Sasuke rasped out.

"I saw her go to your room and call you her lover the day before we left! You got her knocked up you bastard!"

Sakura stood shocked next to the struggling brothers.

"Sai wake Tsunade up! We've got company!" shouted the young woman.

A tall and very pale young man with black hair and eyes came out of the garage, pulling his deep red suspenders from his black slacks and over his black button up. "And who do we have here?" he asked quietly.

"Dunno, but we'll find out soon," she whispered.

Sasuke jabbed Naruto in the gut and got him to let go. "Look!" Sasuke wheezed as he pointed to Sai. "I swear I wasn't sleeping with her. It was just one of her jokes, but look he has dark hair too."

Naruto turned and yelled, "Hinata you bitch!"

"Excuse me?" Hinata screamed furiously. "Do I even know you?"

"I'm gone five years and you up and have twins with another guy!"

"Naruto?"

"Yes it's me, but don't get off subject."

He started stalking towards Hinata while she and Sai did the same. "How dare you, you bastard?" Naruto punched Sai square in the face and knocked him over. "And you, you wh-" Naruto never got to finish his sentence as Hinata slapped him across the cheek.

"Don't you dare call me a whore Naruto! Last I heard you were dead so I was well within my rights to move on. Who their father is, is my business!" She turned, leaving Naruto stunned, and stalked off. "Scarecrow! Your gaggle idiots plus one bastard are here!" She slammed the door of the station behind her.

Naruto finally started to realize Hinata left and shouted, "She slapped me! What the fuck?"

"You would think five years without her would make him appreciate her more." Sakura whispered to Sasuke.

"Yeah, but if you think about it, he's been asleep for most of it. Not exactly exercising the thinking process you know," he replied.

They stood there for a moment watching Naruto throw a tantrum and curse everyone under the sun. "How long till he realizes the kids are most likely his?" asked Sakura.

"Honestly I'm betting that she'd have to have it written in the sky for him to figure it out," said Sasuke. "Well, this is getting boring. Let's go find Kashi and Mom." Sasuke strode past Naruto to Sai, Sakura trailing not far behind. "So, can you take us to Kakashi or what?"

"Sure dickweed." Sai said with a fake smile. "Bring carrot top and loudmouth too wouldya?" Sai strode off towards the garage.

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched as he seethed inside. No one had ever insulted the infamous Raven so casually before. Well, except Naruto. "Move it you idiot! Mom and Kashi aren't getting any younger!" He and Sakura followed Sai. Noticing he was alone, Naruto ran after them.

They found Kakashi bent over under the hood of his silver Cadillac. At the sound of their entrance, he stood up and turned around while whipping oil off his hands with a rag. "What the fuck happened to you guys?" asked Kakashi, taking a drag from the cigarette in the corner of his mouth. "You look like you just came out of that Tokyo Drift movie."

"That's cause we've been in Japan for the past three months dumbass," said Sasuke. "Tell us what the hell happened to you though. You look like you've been bathing in the damn fountain of youth."

Kakashi chuckled and mussed his salt and pepper hair, more pepper than salt thankfully. "Yeah I know. Hinata's been dying my hair for me. Se bought me these clothes too." He gestured towards his distressed jeans, his white wife-beater, his light blue and green plaid button down, and his timberlands. "Hell, she bought me this ridiculous thing too." He pointed to the dark blue eye patch that covered his left eye. "I told her my eye's just sensitive to light and that I didn't need it, but she insisted. She said a red eye plus the scar would scare away customers." He shrugged his shoulders and sat on a nearby stool. "So what kinda hell have you guys been through trying to find us?"

AN: Well, its only four pages, but I'm really curious what people think. This is a gift for 6,000 views, which I'm really proud of even though it's not a huge number like 10,000 or 15,000 or whatever. I don't actually have a plot to go with it yet. It's more of a possibility. If you guys like it then I'll definitely continue, but it's up to you. REVIEW PLEASE!