A/N: Ah, my obsession with Naru couples is finally channelled into a controllable environment. I dare say that everyone I know will benefit from this! Anyways, let's get down to business:

Some of the couples are straight pairings and some are shounen-ai, so, if you don't like shounen-ai (or straight couples) you can always skip that chapter, I will take no offence whatsoever. Also, keep in mind that I will not put any lemons in here...hell, you'd be lucky if you got a lime from my poor mind.

Also, bear in mind that about...25 to 50 of these are crack couples (depending on your views), so some of the couples I'd never write for again (unless I felt especially crack-y). So, no flaming the pairings. If you don't like the stupid crack pairing as a product of my twisted mind, please just walk away. I don't need random people yelling at me about how...Sasori (as an example) would never ever in a bazillion years like Naruto. That's why it's called crack! Because the writers and characters are on crack!

Anywho, read, review and enjoy my randomness!

Because I know you all secretly lovemy cracked mind. –grin-

--

Disclaimer: I'm putting it here because I don't wanna write it for every stupid one-shot! I don't own any of the characters, nor do I want to because then all the fun of pretending to be a ninja disappear! I'm also not making any money (off of this or otherwise). All chars belong to their respective owners...and Uzumaki's ass belongs to all the other chars. Now and forever, baby!

--

Now that that's out of the way, let's get this series of unfortunate one-shots started!