Pass the Scissors
By: Dorkalicious

Summary: Neji, unless you want to be thought of as a transvestite and keep getting hit on by guys, I suggest you get a haircut.
Author's Note: Written with permission of Amaya no Shiori (her idea).
THANK YOU SO MUCH AMAYA NO SHIORI FOR LETTING ME WRITE THIS!

STANDARD DISCLAIMER APPLIED
(When is it not?)

READ & REVIEW!

-

"Neji, to be truthful, I totally thought you were a girl the first time I saw you," Naruto confessed, grinning sheepishly.

Neji glared, walking slowly toward the blond, thinking something terrible inside his head.

(This may have something to do with the murderous look on his face, noted Tenten.)

Tenten and Rock Lee quickly ran over to Neji to restrain him.

Naruto held his hands up, "Whoa dude! Calm down!" and ran away.

(Probably to the Ichiraku Ramen Shop.)

Tenten and Rock Lee turned to the angry Neji.

"Neji, if you really don't want guys thinking you're a girl, just get a haircut," said the exasperated Tenten.

Neji just glared at her, "That is not my fate," and started walking away.

"And Neji?"

He stopped walking and turned around, "What is it Tenten?"

She sighed, "Stop using your Byakugan to look for Naruto."

"Damn it."

-

Neji walked around town (not using Byakugan) looking for the blonde idiot who dared to confess his ridiculous thoughts to him, Neji Hyuuga.

Surprise, surprise, surprise!

Naruto was noisily slurping up his (pork!) ramen next to an irritated Sasuke.

"HEY TEME-" slurp "-SO I SAW-" slurp "-WHITE EYES-" slurp "-TODAY!"

This (noisy) statement stirred up Sasuke's attention.

"Really…go on Dobe."

Little did they (meaning Naruto; Sasuke had already sensed Neji's chakra) know that Neji was hiding in a booth nearby.

"SO LIKE-"

Slurp!

"-I WENT UP TO BUSHY BROWS-"

Slurp!

"-AND WHAT'S HER FACE-"

Slurp!

"YOU KNOW THE ONE WITH THE PANDA HAIR?-"

Slurp!

"-ANYWAYS-"

Slurp!

"-SO LIKE-"

Spilled ramen on Sasuke's lap!

Sasuke knocked down the oblivious Naruto's ramen bowl.

"HEY TEME! I WAS EATING THAT! DATTEBAYO!"

Sasuke glared, "Just. Go. On. With. The. Story."

"HOW CAN I? YOU TOTALLY SPILLED MY RAMEN ON THE FLOOR-"

Sasuke flicked Naruto's forehead and gestured to his wet pants.

"DUDE! YOU WET YOUR PANTS? SAKURA-CHAN WOULD TOTALLY LOVE THIS!"

"You. Spilled. The. Ramen. On. My. Pants," and activated his Sharingan.

Naruto held his hands up, "H-Hey T-Teme! I-I d-don't need another scary d-dude with w-weird eyes out t-to kill me!"

"I'll give you a 5 seconds head start…"

"H-Hey dude! Come on…we're friends right?"

"4…"

"3…"

"GOTTA GO! DATTEBAYO!"

-

Neji walked out of the ramen shop.

He was mad, why?

For starters, Naruto was being an idiot (when was he not?).

And Sasuke Uchiha, eternal rival, was out to take his kill.

Oh, poor, naïve, stupid, little Naruto.

-

The next day after training, "What's Her Face with the Panda Hair," "Bushy Brows," and "White Eyes" all went out to the market for lunch.

Another day, another lunch, another one of Rock Lee's "youthful" rants…

Another guy attempting to hit on Neji because they think he's a girl.

A boy, obviously not a shinobi, walked up to the trio, trying to look "cool."

Even though instead of looking cool, he really looked like he was a drunken octopus with four legs.

"Why hello beautiful, how would you be the lucky girl to accompany me to lunch?"

Tenten rolled her eyes, "I'm sorry, but I'm busy with my friends, gesturing at her teammates who had their backs to her and the boy.

The boy laughed, "Oh, I wasn't asking you! I was asking that hot chick over there!" and pointed at Neji.

Tenten laughed as well, "Hey Neji! Over here!"

Neji looked over at his (sane, female) teammate, "What is it?"

The boy, who happened to be perverted, looked over Neji, "Hey! You're not a babe! You don't have a chest!"

The poor boy was sent in the air thanks to a rather angry shinobi.

-

"Neji, unless you want to be thought of as a transvestite and keep getting hit on by guys, I suggest you get a haircut," said Tenten right after lunch.

Neji made a face at her (still keeping his emotionless façade), "Tenten, I will not give in as quickly as you think."

Tenten smirked, "Oh, so you're still saying you'll give in, just not now."

Neji glared, "Tenten, drop the subject," obviously beaten here.

-

The next day, the trio was again out and about for lunch, walking around after deciding to eat at Ichiraku.

They all sat down at the counter and ordered their ramen when they were interrupted once again.

"Excuse me, I couldn't help wondering what a pretty girl like you was doing standing here all by herself. Any way, I was hoping that maybe you'd like to go out for di-- Ack!"

A rather clueless boy was sent flying.

Grumbling about blind idiots, Neji trudged over to the exit and said over his shoulders, "Alright! You win! I'll get the stupid hair cut!"

Tenten and Rock Lee exchanged victorious glances.

-

Later that week, Neji appeared at training with his hair the same length as it was to the naked eye.

Tenten sighed, "Neji, you didn't get your hair cut like you said."

"Yes I did," and held up a strand of hair that was clearly shorter than the rest, "You just weren't specific enough."

-

THE END

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