So, this is indeed the first Blood Plus fanfic I have ever done. I decided to revised the one-shot and add a couple of stuff but the point of the one-shot is exactly the same. Feel free to review :)
Disclaimer- I do not own Blood Plus.
Pairing: Haji x Kai
Warning- Language and YAOI GOODNESS! (boy on boy love!)
Desire
Thoughts
Kai P.O.V.
I watched the waves crash onto the sands loudly; birds soaring across the sky above me. It was near morning and I decided to sit out here, on the sandy beach and watch the sunrise. Beautiful it was, but mainly because I was thinking about Saya and the others.
Saya...
Ever since father died, everyone's changed. We're more secretive to one another. Yet we have this urge to protect them even if we don't want to be protected ourselves.
Then, there's Haji, Saya's guardian.
I don't know why but he's so...so...
Tempting.
Yeah...that's what it is.
Every time I see him protecting Saya, I get this odd strange feeling. For while, I wasn't sure what was until a few days ago.
It was jealously.
I wanted to be the one that Haji protected. I wanted to be by his side no matter what. It may be selfish, but hey, you can't stop your emotions no matter how hard you try.
Thing is, no matter how much I want Haji, I never knew what to do. Though my desires are burning for him with each passing day, I couldn't even look Haji in the eye, let alone talk to the man.
What am I to do?
Haji has been by Saya's side since our father's death. Even though I was the older one, I've never been able to help her at all. Really, it feels like Saya's pushing me further away. Though she excepts our help, I wonder if she really wants us to. I mean, she's my sister and I respect that, but I sometimes doubt her judgment-
I shook my head.
No! I will not judge Saya! Riku wouldn't judge her, not for a second. There's a good reason for it, but I guess Saya doesn't want us to know about it yet. I wonder if Haji knows...Sexy bastard...Always by her side...I wish I had someone to love and protect me in time of need-
"Whoa!" I said out loud with shock and a faint blush on my cheeks, "This isn't how I'm suppose to think. I'm not like that...am I?"
"Your not what exactly?"
Quickly, I turned around to see Haji standing a few feet away from me. He walked over to me gracefully with his cello case strapped on his back; his eyes never wandered from me.
Butterflies filled my stomach at the thought of Haji present before I quickly looked away when Haji sat next to me. Everytime I'm near him, I almost feel at piece somehow. However, at the exact same time, I want to run away so I don't ruin any moment with him.
"Its nothing." I assured calmly while looking out towards the ocean; a soft breeze brushing our faces oh so gently.
I didn't see that Haji had turned his head from the ocean to look at me; his eyes filled with concern but a calm expression.
He said, "You seemed tensed is all. After seeing you leave with a sad look on your face, I thought I'd come and make sure you were alright-"
"Well now you know. I'm doing just fine Haji." I interrupted his statement and in an instant, I regretted it.
Silence seemed to become our new friend as it settled between Haji and I on the shore. Then, I heard shifting and I turned my head to see Haji standing up and dusting himself off of sand. Our gazes soon locked and I almost scared that Haji would snap at me or say something hurtful towards me.
"I'm sorry to have disturbed you of your peace. I shall leave you then." Haji spoke calmly, his facial expression showed me nothing but something in his gray eyes showed a hint of guilt and regret.
Soon as Haji turned and took five steps forward, I shot right up from my spot on the beach and ran towards the Chevailer. When I reached him, I wrapped my arms tightly around Hajis waist from behind. Hajis' movements had stopped as did my own.
Why did I do that? Why do I feel as if my heart suddenly ripped out when Haji turned to leave? Was it because I didn't want to risk losing him? Was it because my desire to be with Haji has finally shown its' course?
"Maybe that's it." I said quietly to myself as I leaned forward to rest my head on Hajis' back; my grip tightened slightly.
"Kai?" Haji asked towards me but didn't try to turn around to remove himself from my arms.
"Please stay." I said loud enough for Haji to hear but thankfull that he couldn't see more for a blush creeped itself upon my face.
A minute later, I felt Haji remove my arms from his waist before turning around to fully face me. Suddenly, Haji wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me flush against him. I gasped in surprise and reddened even more when I looked up to meet Haji's gaze.
"Haji, what are you-" I was cut off by a pair of lips crashing down on my own.
My eyes widened in shock as I stared at Haji for a while. I did not dare to move, for I was frozen in place by the fact that Haji was kissing me. However, my paniced doubts washed away because I was happy that Haji would even think about doing this to me. Slowly, I melted into the dreamy kiss and closed my eyes as I felt another arm wrap itself around me; pulling me closer.
After a nice moment, Haji broke the kiss gently but didn't move away. I fluttered my eyes opened and looked into Hajis' half-lid eyes to see them masked with relief and content.
Reality struck me down and my eyes widened in shock before I forced myself to step away from Haji. Our gazes still locked on one another.
Oh my God! Haji kissed me! This...this shouldn't have happened. Not this soon. No matter how much I wanted or desired that kiss for so long, I shouldn't have let Haji do it.
Although I backed away, Haji's right hand went straight for my own; lacing our fingers lightly. He took a step towards me as if I was hurt and I couldn't help but blush at the small affectioned towards me. As much I wanted to return the gesture, I pulled my hand from Hajis' grasp and took another step backwards.
"Haji...I don't know what just happened", I know exactly what happened, "but I think we should forget about it completely." I said softly to break the silence and I could literally feel Hajis eyes upon me.
"Why do you push away something that is given to you?" Haji pointed out as I gasped in shock and finally looked up at him.
We stared at one another for a minute until I looked away narrowly. "I don't know what your talking about." I lied through my teeth even though I knew that Haji wouldn't buy into it.
"I can see it in your eyes," I flinched at the words the poured through Haji's lips, "the sadness, the anger and the lonliness you keep deep down inside you. You may be able to hide from Saya and Riku, but I can clearly see. " Haji walked closer to me and once he stood in front of me, a hand rested ontop of my head and ruffled my spiky red hair.
"I know that after everything that has happened, you've been doubting yourself. Not knowing what to feel-" I stopped Haji then and there by shoving his hand away from me and glared at him with a angered growl.
"Enough Haji! You have no idea what it's like! Of course I know how I feel! I'm just afraid to express because I don't want to lose anyone else! i don't want to lose you!" I confessed loudly and not breaking eye contact with the man I fell in love with.
Once more a tensed silence dwelled upon us as Haji stared at me in shock by my sudden outburst and confession. I thought of what I said this very moment before turning around so my back was towards him; my head tilted down slightly.
Though everything Haji said angered me, I knew deep down that it was right. He knew that I felt loneliness because I was afraid to be alone. I was afraid that if I got to overly worried or too attached to Haji, then I would lose him to Diva. That's what I was afraid of the most. Not only him, but Saya and Riku too.
I will not lie and say that my desire is far to great to control now. Since meeting Haji, I've always thought of what it would be like to be loved and held. I would dream about Haji and I together, and making love every night. This only made me feel worse because if this did continue, I would be hurting Saya as well. Just me confessing that I've fallen even harder for Haji was rough enough. I would be stealing someone precious to Saya and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt my sisters' feelings.
Haji and I's connection right now, was indeed a dangerous and unstable one. Where Haji was a Chevalier and could live for decades without age, I would die before I reached 95.
I love Haji so much. So much that it kills me! But I...I don't want to lose him. I don't want to lose something that I just gained.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as I stared at the sandy floor with sadness and anger. I noticed that a shadow was in front of me and my eyes widened at the fact that Haji never left.
That he stayed.
"Kai..." Haji whispers to me.
Ah, that voice. At first, when I heard him speak, I thought he was just a man who spoke little words. Like anyone else but Saya wasn't worth having a conversation with. I thought that maybe he wouldn't even talk to me and that there wouldn't even be a friendship or alliance between us.
But as the days and weeks turns months passed, we slowled developed something. We defended the people we loved. I vowed to protect Saya and Riku while Haji swore alligence to Saya. Our goal to defeat Diva and end this.
Hn, it's funny. At first, I thought all that would be between Haji and I was friendship. I was willing to hold our bond tightly, even though I wanted to badly to be his. To be Haji's lover.
And now, my desire was right in front of me. Willing to accept me as who I was and was offering himself to me. Not caring about the consequences.
My decision was made. I locked eyes with Haji for a second before I closed the gap between us, closed my eyes and kissed Haji lovingly. I could sense that Haji was surprised by sudden once of courage but it changed when I felt him smile and started kissing me back. I blushed shyly at the fact that this was the second time we kissed since we've been on the beach.
Soon, our kiss turned from sweet and tender, to passionate and rough. I felt Haji's tongue beg for entrance into my mouth, which I obligied without question. Our tongues battling for dominance until I lost and let Haji explore; making me moan softly through the kiss. Haji broke our kiss slowly and started kissing from my jaw and down my neck; nibbling and suck the skin gently. Gasping sensitively, I gripped Hajis' shoulders tightly.
I can't believe Hajis' touching me, kissing me. My heart's beating so fast that it could leap out of my chest. I almost want it to stop but I don't want it to. It just feels so good.
A hand slid up my shirt, touching my sides and moving upwards; making me snap out of my lusty cloud and reached down to grab Haji's wrist. My lovers' head pulled back and stared into my eyes as I did the same. His eyes were twirling with love and lust; a combination that seemed to look incredibly good in his eyes.
"Is there something wrong?" Haji asked me in a soft, gentle voice that I've fell in love with.
"If we continue this...neither of us will be able to stop." I panted softly almost like a whisper as my eyes drifted from his eyes to his thin lips and I licked my own unconsciously.
"Do you want to stop?" He asked me; realizing that I was staring at his lips before he smirked and leaned down to steal a breath taking kiss from my own.
I broke the kiss as I closed my eyes for a second to get my thoughts and words in order. It was so hard when your desire kept feeding you fire ever single time. Good thing about it, is that I'm extremely addicted.
Opening my eyes, I looked up at Haji once more before asking, "What about Saya? Though you may kiss me and have feelings for me, doesn't mean that you stopped liking Saya." As much as I didn't want to mention this, it was true.
Saya and Haji shared an incredible bond. If they did love one another, I couldn't blame either of them. Their bond was strong, that not even God himself would be able to seperate them. And because of that, I couldn't help but envy them even though I should not.
"Saya is like a sister to me. I will stay by her side till the very end but we are nothing more than that." Haji answered calmly and truthfully as I nodded and let the words progress into my mind.
Then, Haji leaned down to my ear. "Kai...Your the only person I've ever loved." He whisepred lovingly.
I suddenly froze at the words Haji and reached up to place my hand on his cheek so I could look at him clearly. Carefully, I searched his eyes for a sign of doubt or hesitation; in case he was lieing to me.
But there was none.
He really does love me. My one desire loves me back in return.
Without giving any warning, I pulled Haji towards me which sent us falling on the ground with him on top of me. Though we would be covered with sand, neither of us didn't give a care in the world. Our lips greeted one another but it wasn't passionate like the previous kiss, but it was soft and sweet kisses. I wrapped an around Haji's neck, pulling him to me as close as possible and hand in his black hair. I managed to take the band out and let his long hair flow out. When I did, I pulled away from the kiss to stare at Haji with adoring gaze.
"Your beautiful." I told Haji with a smile as I threaded my fingers through his hair.
My gaze moved from my lovers' hair to his face and when I did, I was greeted with a smile.
A true smile that only I could see. May I say, it was breathtaking.
"Not as beautiful as you, Kai." He said back and I blushed as red as my hair.
Before I responded though, I placed my hand on his shoulders; giving them a loving squeeze since Haji was hovering over me. I smiled up at him kindly and leaned up to give him a kiss on the cheek before whispering something in his ear.
"Don't stop."
Those two words was the only thing I had to say. After that, Haji stared down at me with love before diving down to kiss me hard. I returned the rough kiss with my own;not wanting to break the wonderful sensation that was coursing through my body.
Haji wasn't just Saya's Chevalier.
He wasn't just someone I love.
He was someone I desired for a very long time. And now that I finally have him, I don't plan on letting my desire escape me. I'll protect him, no matter what it takes.
THE END
That my friends, is the one shot. I wrote this because there aren't a lot of Kai and Haji fanfics these days, and so maybe I thought I'd help them out with a story of my own. Plus, they have a lot in common then people think. HOWEVER, I do have a sequel (kinda), to this one-shot if you like the pairing. Its' called "Dark Flame". Check it out if you want. Other than that, thanks for reading and review if you will! =)