A/N: I am deeply sorry for the long wait! I'm just not inspired on what to write next (although I've got a set ending). I know this chapter is more of a scatter, as I'm thinking on what to do next to move it forward. Reviews are loved! Thanks :)

BPOV

I hear the soft, squishing sounds of the grass as the wind blew past my face. I smelled the salty sea from afar, and good food as well. My eyes perked up and I was looking into the face of my kidnapper – Jacob.

He grinned, his face turning all sunny and happy, and said, "You hungry for real food, Bella?" He put me down and led me to a house by the forest that was giving off the good smell.

"I think Emily's got some eggs and bacon ready for us!" Quil said excitedly, rushing to the door. Jacob immediately grabbed his shoulder and said, "Ladies first, you mongrel."

I was led to the house and I was forced to sit down on one of the chairs while Jacob sat next to me. He introduced me to Emily, the cooking mama of the kitchen (I assume she's a hostage of some sort) who is balancing three pans of at least twenty eggs and another pan of bacon. She was so amazing! I've never seen anything like it, except on those chef shows on TV!

Renee would probably slit her hand before she can finish cutting a carrot up. That's why we end up eating at diners half the time I'm with her.

She served the food expertly and smiled to me, before turning her back to cook more. More guys poured in the ever-shrinking room, and I realized then and there that they all stunk – literally.

I cast a desperate look at Emily, but she was too into cooking to notice! My eyes watered as if I was chopping onions, and with the last bit of vision I had, I saw Emily was doing the disco with her pan handle…

EPOV

"BELLA!!!!" I screamed, at the top of my lungs. We were at the border between the werewolves' and our territory.

"She's not going to hear you, Eddy. We might as well give it up until Carlisle can have further contact with the wolves," Alice explained, "c'mon, we should go home."

I shook my head. "I'm going to wait for Bella to come home!" I crossed my arms and leaned on a tree.

"For God's sakes Edward! Can't you see? Emmett is so hungry! Look at him! Pity him!" Rosalie cried, pointing at her husband that now turned into something less…less vampire.

Emmett was biting and chewing tree branches, tears in his eyes as he pleaded to Edward. Rosalie put her hands on his neck and cried, a couple bonded into one, with tears like a glistening waterfall…

Edward made a grunting noise before he ran off back to the house without so much of a word.

"YES! Alright, let's go Emmett," Rosalie cheered. Alice laughed as Emmett spat out twig branches and a variety of bugs that went with them.

Everyone sat in the living room, obviously more tense than before. Alice was no help, as she cannot see the wolves at all, while Carlisle tried contacting Billy numerous times.

"Hello? Yes, this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen, I am looking for Billy Black?"

"Huh? He's playing tennis? Oh…wrong number? I am so sorry."

"Hello? Yes this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen, is Billy Black here?"

"Oh, my I'm sorry this was a crackhouse? Sorry, sorry my apologies."

"Hello? Yes this is Dr. Carlisle Cullen, is Billy Black here?"

"Oh Denise? Oh no! I mean, I am sick.. of course, I – uh mistakenly called the hospital..I mean I was looking for my friend who checked in I think…uh, I think you are doing a wonderful secretarial job at my office. Thank you. I'll see you tomorrow."

The rest of the family met Carlisle with gloomy stares.

"What are we to do now? We can't contact Billy, and we're not definitely crossing the border," Alice said, glaring at Edward who looked thoughtful.

"Edward, we cannot be rash. I doubt they'll harm Bella," Carlisle advised, "but still, werewolves can pose exceptional danger."

"Like we don't," Rosalie sneered.

"Rosalie!" Esme scolded.

"You guys totally ruined my mojo," Jasper complained, getting off his yoga position from the floor.

Edward gripped his head in frustration, headaches spiraling into a deep storm within his brain that has turned golden with age. He started to see in circles.

He let out a scream of rage and frustration.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"I think Edward's gone wild, eh," Emmett whispered to Rosalie.

"Oh no! He's not 18 yet! That's not legal! He's only 17!" Rosalie's eyes bulged as she stared pitifully at her brother.

"Technically, he's 100+ by now," Emmett whispered back, "he's more than ready…"

"Oh God, who buys a '100+ yr old gone wild DVD?" Rosalie asked, horrified.

"I dunno. Carlisle? I think maybe Jasper," Emmett replied seriously, "but I WILL FIND OUT."

They both nodded, contemplating on the more serious development that occurred.

Meanwhile… BPOV

I don't know what's worse, a stinky guy, or a stinky guy's hairy armpits.

Embry's armpits looked like there was a village of hair follicles growing in there! Quil's was much more bearable, although I suggested to him that Dove Arm Whitening deodorant was the best for him since it whitens his dark and smelly underarms. Jacob's armpits were simply beastly and I did not even bother recommending any deodorant to him, but implied that laser hair surgery removal was possible these days…

I cross my hand in hopes that Emily does not follow the suits these guys do…