LD 1449 AN: I thought up Nature Chakra before Kishimoto. The only reason this wasn't out before that manga chapter was because drag-eart, my co-author, took forever to get back on the proverbial stage. *glares*

Things that go wrong with Foxes and Monkeys
By: Ld 1449 and drag-eart

Chapter 5: Shikamaru's Bad Day

Naruto struggled with an almost inhuman effort, trying to pull the god forsaken robe over his head to finish dressing himself.

He refused to call for help, but he felt as though he was pulling up a three ton sheet of plate metal to pull over his head.

The gravity of this planet was insane! And he was just trying to get dressed! While sitting down!

He didn't even want to think of what nightmare Goku must be going through to try and catch that damn monkey.

Finally, his straining arms managed to bring the top piece of cloth up to eye level.

Eyes widening in surprise, Naruto felt a surge of just pure, unadulterated adrenalin surge through his arms, gifting him with what must have been inhuman strength as, with one more great heave he pulled the black robe over his neck, settling it across his shoulders.

His feeling of triumph was immediately destroyed as the crushing weight bore down on his neck and shoulders.

Staggering, face reddening with effort, he managed to put one arm through one sleeve, then put the other through the last, allowing the blackened silk to pool around where he sat. How King Kai had clothes his size he didn't know, nor did he care. He had long since decided to forgo deciphering the weirdness of this world.

Exhausted, muscles throbbing beneath his skin, Naruto mentally counted how long he'd been awake...

If he had to guess...about...twenty minutes...

And he currently felt as if he'd been doing push ups for three days straight.

So...he only had to stay awake for another...oh...16-17 hours?

Yea...this was looking up to be a great...great...day...

Maybe he should knock himself out...it would be less painful...

"Oh Naruto!" Came in King Kai's voice from the outside of the house. Cheerful and simply too laid back for the struggling blonds perspective. "Should I send in bubbles to help? Getting dressed by a monkey is quite the experience."

Refraining from delivering the comeback that was just dying to escape from his lips, Naruto stood on shaking legs, determined to not fall behind Goku, who could already at least walk without every step taking him a good three minutes.

The black robes he had just put on were pulled down by the gravity, making him feel as if he were wearing a necklace of seven three pound chains, and was chugging three gallon buckets on each shoulder.

They were to the likeness of King kai, only real difference was that instead of a red inner

Hakama and Haori they were blue, the novice collar.

Finally, after almost another half hour, the blond reached the front door of the house, pushing the door open the blond collapsed in a heap as he finally reached the exit. This was insane!

Opening his eyes, he found himself staring up at the blue skinned King Kai. "Giving up already?"

Naruto rolled his eyes, surprised that he even had the strength to do that.

"Just. Give me a minute..." He said, voice, guttural with his exhaustion and pain.

With a dismissive wave of his hand King Kai scoffed. "Please. I know where you're from, you'll be lucky if you'll even be able to stand upright in two months."

Naruto's pupils turned into thin, tiny pin pricks. Fear bringing him to the verge of hyperventilation.

Two months? It had barely been two days!

Still, forcing himself to calm down he decided to speak in as calm a voice as he could muster.

"So what? I'm supposed to just crawl around till my body gets used to this?"

"Oh no of course not. You'd waste too much time. No. There is a means for you to get strong enough to at least walk around in the next few days. Naruto perked up at that. An end to the pain of this gravity? He'd take it!

"Alright, what do you need me to do?"

King Kai nodded once to himself. "Well first thing I need is for you to forget everything that you've ever learned about fighting."

Naruto blinked once. "Huh?"

"I need you to forget everything that you've ever learned about fighting." He repeated. "In your world, your people fight using the mixture of spiritual and physical energies. Chakra. Obviously the physical part is out."

Naruto nodded. He'd known that since he stepped foot in this god forsaken place. Ain't you the master of the obvious?' He thought. "Ok so what's your point? You're gonna teach me how to just use spirit energy to compensate?"

"No." Kai said. "I'm going to teach you how to use Nature chakra."

"I already know how to do that." Naruto said. "And," He continued, voice dripping with cynicism, "Unless you forgot, it needs to be balanced with human chakra to not turn me into a toad statue; which, I obviously can't do."

"Wrong!" Kai exclaimed, fist raising to his eyes. "What you learned is how to harness the essence of your surrounding environment. That is not the same as the true nature chakra I will teach you."

Naruto nodded slowly on the ground. Or at least it looked like he was nodding.

"Ooookay." He ventured cautiously. "So...what's the first step."

"It's similar to what you've learned, so you should be able to grasp the concepts fairly quickly. You see, before, you were told to simply gather the chakra from the environment that surrounded you. In essence, absorbing all of Nature's power at once. Far too much power for one human body to handle. Which is why you needed to water it down with your own weaker human chakra."

"Okay, got that." Naruto said trying to pay attention as best as possible.

"What I am going to teach you, is fundamentally the same as that, it is also an ability very much like a technique of mine called, 'The Spirit bomb'. Only, instead of harnessing Nature's energy for an outward attack, you will harness it internally, essentially making your body a living power rod for all the energy around you."

"One of the key pieces of this training however, is learning to separate the different elements of nature, and passing it through certain conduits of your body. I will teach you how to filter and separate nature to its base elements throughout your training here. Earth, fire, lightning and water. Each will possess its own place and role in your body, so the massive overcharging of power is very unlikely to occur as it did in your world... and you won't turn into a garden ornament."

Naruto shook his head. "Okay so what you're saying issss…"

Staring down at the blond, deadpan expression on his face, the so called master martial artist nudged Naruto's temple with his foot, irritating the helpless blond.

"What I'm saying is that I want you to feel around you, as you did when trying to draw in the nature chakra like you've learned before, and then filter out everything in there, except, of course, for the first and most essential element you currently require. Earth."

Naruto nodded, taking in a breath. "Ooookaaaay..." he thought, before closing his eyes in concentration, trying to ignore the sounds of Goku running around.

Minutes later, Naruto peeked open an eye to look back up at King Kai. "Just how the hell am I supposed to know what the earth chakra feels like?"

Speaking with patience, since it had been such a long time since he'd taught this particular method of fighting, the blue skinned bug man gave the best explanation he could.

"The element of earth, is the most concrete of all four. It is a foundation, abundant and strong everywhere you'll go. Gathering its energy, and spreading it over your skin and within to your bones, and muscles, you'll increase your physical strength by ten fold, along with bone density and skin resistance to impacts. Since Earth, as I said, is the most abundant of all elements, it is probably the one whose effects you felt the most when you yourself used your version of nature chakra back on your world."

Naruto nodded. "Okay then just for curiosity before I start again. What do the others do?"

"Well, the next element you'll learn is the lightning element. It is the one that will give you the power of flight. Using it, will allow you to manipulate your Bio-electric energy, shifting your body's minor magnetic field to be the exact opposite of that of the your own planet, and as such, will lift you off the ground. But we'll cover more on that subject later. Fire is the one that follows lightning. Very basic, it is a primarily raw offensive element, which you will be able to use in combination with lightning to fire blasts similar to the Ki blasts Goku and his friends are more accustomed to using."

"Ki-what?"

"More on that later. Now, the last element, water, is very difficult to master. You most likely won't be able to get to this one while you train here so we'll discuss it some other time. For now, focus on separating the essence of the earth from the other elements. Once you manage to stand, I've got a bit of a surprise for you alright?"

Naruto nodded, deciding to close his eyes and begin concentrating again.

"Excuse me."

The wind was suddenly knocked out of the blond as King Kai stepped on his stomach, walking over him to make it back into the house.

Now, given the gravity, and King Kai's status as a portly little bastard, it just felt as if he were run over by a wheel barrow carrying bricks. Not exactly pleasant.

"You'd better get that earth element down fast Naruto, I'll be walking out with a heavy tray of food in an hour or two."

Sweating, the blond began frantically trying to pull away the feel of the earth chakra from the other three. He would at least move himself away from this God forsaken doorway. He'd seen enough of Goku's appetite while at princess snakes to know that the oaf would never even notice having crushed him underfoot once food was ready.

Nearly four hours later Naruto found himself slowly but surely pushing himself up off the floor. His flushed cheeks were red as tomatoes with the sheer effort he was pushing into his arms, forcing himself to keep his concentration through the sheer agony that burned up his arms.

Finally he reached his hands and knees, putting his arms ram rod straight, allowing the weight and pressure of his body to rest on the joints of his elbows and wrists.

Allowing himself a breath, the blond ninja cropped up one leg. Breathing once, twice, three times, he heaved himself onto his remaining foot, before straightening himself up to his full height.

Glancing down at his feet, chest heaving with labored breaths as his heart hammered within him, a single chuckle escaped his lips, followed by another, then another, until the blond was laughing as loud as his limited breath and strength would allow him.

"Ha! Take that, gravity!" He cried out. The glory and elation of his triumph carrying him to an all new high.

"Food's ready!" He heard King Kai call from the inside of the house. And to Naruto, he never thought he'd ever heard words so beautiful. It'd been ages since he last ate.

Of course...that perceived beauty soon turned to absolute horror when he heard Goku somewhere behind him. "FOOD!"

Snapping his head around Naruto barely caught sight of an orange shoulder before it slammed into him, knocking him on his ass before slamming flat onto his back.

Dazed and unregistering for a moment, it took Naruto a moment to realize that he was back where he started...

On the floor...flat...on...the...floor.

Again...

Alright...this is fine...he'd stand up again...calmly...rationally...

Then...he'd grab the kitchen knife...And calmly...rationally proceed to stab the black haired idiot until he stopped consuming oxygen!

Hours later, Naruto found himself sitting at the table, stuffed as he finished his third plate of food. Of course Goku had practically inhaled three tables worth but hell, it barely mattered to him what the guy did at that point. He was full and content. Even the pull of this planet's ridiculous gravity couldn't keep his spirits down.

"Ahh that was good!" Goku said, voicing Naruto's own thoughts.

To the blond's great surprise however, Goku instantly stood and looked to the monkey in the corner. "Come on bubbles, lets get going again!"

And again, to Naruto's surprise, the man proceeded to walk out of the house, much more easily than he had been doing a few hours ago apparently.

He stared at the door for a second, before allowing his head to fall against the back of the seat. That guy was unbelievable.

And he was feeling ridiculously inadequate.

Before the blond could continue his thoughts, the portly blue skinned bug man marched up to him.

"Alright so. You were able to stand up. Couldn't pick up the kitchen knife yet but its impressive for your second day."

Blinking, Naruto turned his gaze outside to where one could see Goku actually climbing a tree with some degree of success...

Oh yeah... His accomplishment of standing was awesome in comparison to that!

Listening to a shift of a chair sliding against the tiled floor, he looked back to King Kai and balked at seeing the guy sitting on a chair with his back to him, "Alright, lets get on with it."

Naruto's face scrunched up. "Get on with it? Get on with what? What are you talking about?"

"Oh right you don't know." He said, more to himself than Naruto. "Well you see. I have the ability to communicate telepathically across the planes. All you'd need to do is put your hand on my back and focus on the person you want to communicate with."

"Uhhh...okay...and...how'd you know I would wanna communicate with anyone?" He asked even as he placed his hand on the Kai's back.

"Your mind is troubled. I can tell. You have left unresolved issues in your past that must be brought to the attention of a loved one before you can focus." The old Kai said sagely. 'That and you kept on muttering 'How the hell did I even die?' in your sleep."

Naruto nodded, impressed with the old bigs intuition. Maybe he really was an awesome martial artist after all.

He took a moment to scan through the list of people that may actually believe something like this...someone who was smart, and able to think of something , or investigate something.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Shikamaru sat comfortably on his grass covered hill, his smoking cigarette carrying the tang of tobacco to his lips as he lightly breathed more of it in little by little. The clouds rolled lazily above him as he calmly closed his eyes to catch some sleep.

Yeah...life was good.

'Hey Shika. Hey Shika can you hear me!'

Growling the lazy Nara sat from his hill. "What is it Naru-" He stopped mid sentence, looking around the entire hill and not finding a single person.

'Oh good you can hear me! Hey Shika look. It's been a weird two months for me but I need your help. Ya see. I'm dead...somehow. So I'm calling you from this guy King Kai's shoulder. I need you to find the others, tell them what's going on and find out what the hell happened to me. I don't remember dying. Hell, the last thing I remember was that party that me and... nevermind, just find the others alright? Can you do that?'

Shikamaru blinked several times. Eyes, nervously darting left and right as he blinked, spreading out his senses, scanning for anyone that may be using a Genjutsu. Finding none, the shadow wielder looked to his cigarette, then to the clouds above...and back to his cigarette

Snuffing out the embers of the cancer stick, Shikamaru stood wiping his hands before he reached into his pocket and threw out the whole pack he still had. "That's enough of that bullshit."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Piccolo barely dodged a punch thrown by Gohan, his momentum leaving the young Saiyan exposed. The Namekian grabbed the extended arm and tossed the young boy at the edge of a cliff they stood upon. Gohan landed roughly on the ground sliding across the gravel, the sharp rocks imbedding itself on his skin. Piccolo giving no quarter, attacked with another barrage. The Namekian's eyes widened when Gohan's attacks became even more intense, even more desperate, trying to not tumble over.

Piccolo gritted his teeth when Gohan stayed airborne throwing a barrage of leg kicks his way. The Namekian grabbed one of the legs and threw him down. Gohan recovered quickly, only to be met by lightning punches heading in his direction. Bone crunching, they collided onto his small forearms, pushing the young Saiyan back towards the edge of the cliff. Smelling the eventual defeat, Piccolo struck much harder and in the process, losing sight while attacking without abandon. Gohan seeing the slight slip, powered up and went straight on with an attack. His body glowed a bright yellow before punching him across his face, surprising the Namekian.

Piccolo staggered for a bit, not really caring that a punch had landed, but rather the sheer force of the power behind it. He was improving. Gohan landed back down on the ground looking up at his Teacher, who by now looked down at his student chuckling. "That's it…" He rubbed the bruise quickly starting to form, smirking at his student's accomplishment.

"…But, don't stop!" Piccolo bellowed, quickly attacking the young Saiyan. The punch was unexpected and it hit the young boy, sending Gohan flying over the cliff and falling into the river below. He breached the river breathing and choking, swimming for dear life from the rapids. Gohan barely grabbed on to a boulder before looking up at his Teacher who stood on the top it.

"Piccolo, can you help me out here please," Gohan pleaded, reaching out his hand. Piccolo gave no verbal response, but extended his hand for Gohan to grasp. The demi Saiyan grabbed hold of the thumb of the Namekian, who enclosed his hand tightly around Gohan's. Piccolo quickly lifted the young boy to eye level.

"There will be no help," Piccolo released Gohan and threw another round of punches, with Gohan dodging every one of them. But being airborne for a extended amount time and not of his own accord left him wide open when he began to descend. The Namekian quickly kicked the young Saiyan square in the chest, sending him back into the river. Gohan came out of the water coughing harshly, holding on tightly to a boulder on the other side of the bank. He climbed over the boulder, slowly rising on his feet, he faced Piccolo once again.

Piccolo entered the inner sanctums of his mind as the boy was slow to get up. 'I've got to keep pushing him, I know he can reach a new level before they get here…' The Namekian was quickly pulled from his thoughts when Gohan flew over the water giving a battle cry to fuel the hot blooded adrenalin running through his veins. Piccolo jumped back falling in step with the incoming assault Gohan threw. "That's the way Kid."

Shikamaru clenched his eyes shut, hands going over his ears as his teeth grated against one another with enough force to crack and chip.

All damn day he'd been hearing Naruto's insufferable voice in his head and none of his attempts to get the voice to stop were working. He was about to voluntarily call the loony house himself to see if they could get him to Shut the Bloody Hell Up!'Shika! Shika!Shika! Shika!Shika! Shika!...Shikashikashikashikashika! God damnit. Is your name not working? How bout these other ones? Nara-lazy bones-jackass-Ino's not so secret lover.

Shika! Damn it listen to me... 'I am your father'...I am your momma's milk man."

As the voice droned on and on and on Shikamaru found himself taking to the rooftops. Rushing through the village in hopes of getting home and knocking his head against a wall until he passed out. Why couldn't he dream of someone else's voice. A woman. Someone sexier and more pleasant to listen to than this annoying bastard!

'You know I'm not gonna stop until you actually listen to me right?'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dodge. Keep dodging. Gohan kept repeating this when Piccolo was continuously shooting an array of Ki blasts from both arms. Gohan jumped from side to side, trying to confuse the Namekian, but to no avail. The blasts were starting to singe pieces of his clothing when he dodged the last blast. The demi Saiyan flipped in the air before landing on his feet waiting for the next barrage.

"Attack! Don't just dodge, get inside!" Piccolo thundered before letting loose another round of waves. Gohan narrowly missed a blast letting it pass between his arm and torso. He felt the heat pass through, the attack powerful enough to leave a scorching signature. The young Saiyan ran across the field, the relentless blasts following in his wake. Gohan, at the last minute before reaching the edge of the cliff, turned.

Disappearing, Gohan dodged every attack that was being thrown his way. Piccolo's eyes widened as the demi Saiyan began to run faster right before his eyes. He gritted his teeth, sending another barrage but the young warrior anticipated every wave that came. The Namekian, seeing the young warrior closing in, sent forth a large blast, whereas Gohan fazed out of sight and reappeared above his position, crashing down with a cry ready to finish it.

Piccolo, having none of that, caught the demi Saiyan off guard when his eyes glowed an eerie color, sending a laser like beam towards the boy. It connected directly, shocking his entire nervous system. Gohan fell face first into the ground breathing heavily, "I think you burned my underwear…."

Piccolo gave a spectacle look, not really believing the demi Saiyan was joking at a time like this. Yes, he pulled back on the amount he charged in the blow, but nevertheless it was enough to stun a person cold. He growled in response. "That's enough. You must learn to anticipate any attack."

"You cheated," Gohan replied, getting up slowly but surely. He looked at the Namekian directly, bruised and battered, his eyes furrowed, "Remember, no eye lasers."

"Don't be foolish," Piccolo snarled, his temper getting the best of him. "You should never believe what the enemy tells you."

"Yeah," Gohan argued, but stood quiet, trying to come up with a better response. "But, you know…you're not the enemy," The little Saiyan said feebly. Gohan was so engrossed in something else other than the fight he almost missed the sudden rise in a ki and Piccolo's vertical cross chop. The demi Saiyan was barely able to lift his arm to block, sending Gohan to the ground. He looked up angrily, " Hey, no fair that was a cheap shot!"

Piccolo looked down at his apprentice and simply smirked, "Oh, well there's something you have to learn about Saiyans." Piccolo turned abruptly, his arm raised right in front of the demi Saiyan palm spread open. He snarled and bellowed loudly. " They're not fair!"

Gohan barely manage to let out a cry when he was consumed in light, the attack sending him flying over the cliff. The long fall was shortened when he caught hold of a branch but the limb was too weak to support his weight making the young Saiyan fall all the way down the hill. He may have stopped the full damage of the fall from the top, but the pain he felt throughout his body was not prejudiced. It was fair. Gohan groaned in pain, he looked through the dust cloud that formed when he fell and saw the figure of his teacher standing at the edge.

"If you ever manage to make it back up here we'll resume the training. Or…" Piccolo chuckled, before turning away from the cliff. "You can give up and go home." The Namekian mocked, walking a few feet from the edge of the cliff. He sat down abruptly and settled nearby. Closing his eyes, he breathed in deeply, beginning to meditate.

But his eyes opened when Gohan gave a mighty cry scaling the cliff with his bare hands and sheer will. Piccolo looked ahead waiting for his eventual arrival. He remained rooted in place smirking to himself. "Damn kid."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Blood shot eyes stared up at the dark ceiling of his room. Filtering shadows and nightly sounds made him jump. Twitchy and bordering on paranoia, Shikamaru sought some form of relief even as the voice kept on pounding away inside his mind.

If he ignored it...it would go away.

'Shika...are you there...can you hear me now?'

On and on and on it went until finally, clutching his head the Nara boy shouted a resounding 'What do you want?' that resonated throughout the room, down the hallway and echoed out to the street.

Finally, at last. There was silence, and Shikamaru's eyes went left and right, almost searching for the voice with his gaze before he finally sighed in relief after a minute or two of silence.

It was over.

Falling back to the bed, he allowed himself to relax.

…

…
…

'Wait...was that actually you asking me or were you talking to somebody else?

Dark eyes snapped wide open and a scream resonated through the village.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Meanwhile in Kami's lookout, Krillin, Yajerobi, Yamcha and Tien squared off against one another respectively, each exchanging punches and kicks in a flurry of movement as they trained for the approaching saiyains just as everyone else was doing.

Standing off to the side was the floating Chaotzu, Kami and Mr. Popo.

"Wow, Tien and Yamcha are really good. They're almost evenly matched." The little clown faced boy said with a personal nod of appraisal.

"Gay."

The diminutive human's head snapped back around, eyes wide as he searched for the source of the voice. Only finding the still form of Mr. Popo standing just a few feet away, eyes staring dead ahead as he looked to the four fighters. The smile still firmly entrenched onto his features.

Attributing it to the trick of the wind Chaotzu turned back to face Kami who was speaking at his side. "Indeed. I do believe that, though still no match directly for the Saiyans, at their current strength they will be able to give a good fight even without Goku's help once the Saiyans arrive. With Goku's assistance, victory will almost be certain."

Nodding, Chaotzu felt a smile grace his face before it was brutally chopped down by the voice that reached his ears.

"They'll eat you alive."

Snapping his head around he still only found a statue-esque form standing at Kami's side, with the old Namekian silent as though he hadn't heard a thing.

Attributing it to another trick of the wind, Chaotzu turned his gaze back to the others who kept on fighting. Never able to explain the chill that crawled up his spine at the faint sound of laughter that echoed in his mind.

"Aaaaha ha ha ha. Aaaahhh ha ha ha ha ha!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

He was going insane.

He wasn't sure when it had started. He wasn't sure how, or why. Maybe it had been his mom's meatloaf yesterday.

But whatever it was. Shikamaru was certain that he was going insane.

He was talking to himself!

Is this what Ino experienced when she did it? If so the blond was even more whacked out than he'd previously thought.

And her mood swings made him think she was missing half the pieces to a game of chess at the best of times.

"Ok..so you're dead..."

Yes.

"Ok...and...you contacted me why?"

Because I don't remember why I died. Or when. I need you to find out.

"Okay. Why the hell didn't you call Kakashi then? He's the Hokage he can order an investigation. Instead of me...a Jounin...that can't just...go out and find out...this crap."

Uhh...well...you're smart...I figured you're the one that would find out why I died the easiest.

'I must be going nuts.' The Nara thought, rubbing his temples.

Alright well I'll call Kakashi right now the-

Oh no you're not. You've been holding me all day. There is no way I'm walking around with you touching me for another eight hours!

Alright. It was official. Shikamaru decided. He was now irrevocably insane. A supposed voice in his head of a dead Naruto was sexually molesting another old guy!

Good lord his psyche must be one fucked up mess.

'Stop trying to touch me!'

Yup...it was official... He was getting help.

Professional help!

'Ack-damnit look I'll talk to you later Shikamaru. Just try to find out what happened to me. I think I was on a mission down south. Bye!'

Blinking as the voices finally faded away into nothingness. Looking to his nightstand he opened up his drawer and pulled out a pack of smokes.

He was already insane. Quitting was gonna drive him over the bleeding edge if he tried at this point. He may end up pulling an Itachi on this place.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

'Alright now lets get started. You've wasted enough time already," was King Kai's annoyed voice as he stood just outside his house, ignoring Goku and Bubbles who continued to chase and be chased respectively throughout this tiny pebble of a planet.

Nodding Naruto tried to subtly stretch his throbbing back, which was just beginning to feel the strain of remaining upright in this gravity.

'No pain no gain' The motto had worked for Gai, it would work for him too.

For the first time in a long time. Naruto felt the brimming excitement of training charge through him. He wondered what kind of wild and new exercises and techniques he would have to learn in order to get the full hang of this.

It must be brutal.

"Now then. The key to mastering the form of nature manipulation I will teach you, lies…deeply in meditation."

And at that, Naruto felt a grimace spread across his face. Meditation...that meant lying perfectly still for hours on end. Sighing, the blond supposed he'd seen this coming. Hell, the key to mastering his form of it required perfect stillness at all times.

Taking a deep breath King Kai placed his hands in front of him, palms down, parallel to the ground, between his upper chest and belly button. "Deep breaths. You must clear your mind of all thought, and focus on the nature around you. Feel its energy and strength. Then, as you did with the earth element, separate its elements, and draw it into yourself."

"Why can't I just do what Goku's doing?" The blond questioned looking to the black haired lunatic who was currently climbing the house. "It looks like its working for him!"

"Because. You, nor your people, train in the same way Goku does." The blue skinned ethereal explained, adjusting his glasses. "Your people harness both spiritual energy and physical energy to fight. Your body is accustomed to such conditions. Goku harnesses only physical energy. Turning your body away from chakra, to Ki would do a lot more harm than good. I am teaching you how to harness chakra in a different way. So that you might match raw Ki energy or raw Chi energy if you ever encounter a spirit wielder.

Grumbling Naruto decided to give it one more try. "Alright so...theoretically...if I was to try and use Ki or whatever how long would it take to be at Goku's current skill?"

"Hmmmmm..." The Kai said to himself, pondering the query as he ran the calculations through his head. "About thirty years."

Blanching Naruto soon felt a nervous laugh rise up to his lips. "Right...well...lets get started on that meditation."

Kai nodded, a pleased smile on his lips. "Good good. Now remember, the meditation is simple. Feel the nature around you, identify, separate, then draw into yourself. Earth is the predominant element, so it will be the quickest and easiest for you to gain a grasp of. It'll also let you walk around the planet easier."

"What about exercise? I mean. Nature chakra only enhances the strength of the guy using it based on the guys own strength without it. Soon enough I'll need some of those crazy exercises to get my body stronger."

"No you won't." Kai said decisively. "You see, there's nature all around you. It is endless. As your focus becomes more acute, and you expand your senses more and more, the greater your "range" will be, for drawing in the power of nature. Essentially, the more you meditate and practice your mental focus, you will become progressively, and naturally stronger. The only exercise you really need to do is just enough to maintain your physique and nothing more."

Naruto blinked, disbelief on his face. "That's...a little weird...but...I guess it makes sense."

"Good. Now stop wasting time. Begin your meditation. Once I feel you've mastered the earth element enough we'll move onto the following, Lightning."

Nodding, Naruto proceeded to march to the base of the single, nearby tree. Sitting down, he crossed his legs into the lotus position and began the breathing exercises he learned so long ago with Pa-toad.

Several feet away King Kai smiled to himself. It had been a long time since he'd trained any Chakra user before. He hoped he got that stuff right. Otherwise the guy was going to be wasting a lot of time.