Some people may ask, why surgery? Surgeons, a lot of the time, won't give a direct answer; they'll follow a cop out analogy. I, on the other hand, am a realist; surgeons, like me, have issues; whether it be a failure in marriage or parenthood; or perhaps a lapse in judgement that severely made you question your position in your career; or sometimes we may just be a little crazy, or like me…totally screwed. We become surgeons to escape the tingling feel of loneliness, to compensate for whatever is left in our lives.
Rounds are always a great way to start the day; but when you've been up all night with your boyfriend, had next to no sleep, then you wake up to discover that your roommates have nevertheless eaten all of your cereal. Oh, and to top it off, to have moronic interns running around with no clue of the difference between a 7 intubator and a 7-5 intubator, it could be seen that rounds just were not where I wanted to be.
I arrived at the hospital to find Izzie sleeping on the floor in front of my locker and Cristina lazily sprawled across two chairs. I walked over and nudged Cristina with my hand and poked Izzie with my foot.
"Late night on call?" I asked.
Izzie groaned.
"You have no idea!" she whined.
I put my hands on my hips.
"No idea?" I cried.
Cristina shrugged.
"Well, all you have is McDreamy and the rugrat," she replied.
"McDreamy, who decides at 3am that he wants to have sex! And the rugrat who keeps me up until 12am because there are gremlins in her closet, an idea which, for your information, she got from her Auntie Cristina who decided to read her The Labyrinth!" I told them.
Cristina chuckled.
"She insisted! And there was no way I was going anywhere near the crap of those fairytales you two read to her!" she told Izzie and me.
Bailey walked in and folded her arms.
"Grey, your interns are…well, just deal with them!" she told me.
I raced out to the nurse's station where George and Amber were arguing. At this stage, however, it seemed that George was on his own and the other interns were on Amber's side.
"It's not fair that you should get in on this case just because you slept with our resident!" Amber screeched as she snatched the chart.
"It happens to be a familiar case with me!" George cried while he snatched the chart back.
I walked over and snatched the file from George and opened it up.
"It's Tom Maynard!" George said quickly. "Train wreck, pole right through him, Tom!"
I raised my eyebrows and looked at the file.
"George, you're familiar with this case, I need you to be attentive when we round," I told him. I turned to Amber who rolled her eyes. "If you have a problem, you see me; I will not have you shouting on my surgical floor!"
"Sorry Dr. Grey…" Amber turned and mumbled to the others. "I date men, so I won't be seeing her…"
I whipped around.
"Just for that, you are on Dr. Yang's service today, doing what you don't want to do!"
Cristina walked over.
"Dr. Yang, I will take Dr. Grey from you today, you can take Dr. Jennings today," I said to her. "She has also volunteered her services on rectal exams and any enemas you may need."
Cristina looked at me with raised eyebrows.
"Not to self, Grey is the new Nazi in training!" George said to me quietly.
"Damn right!" I replied. I turned to Lexie and motioned for her to move. "Rounds people!" We walked into Tom's room where I felt memories of 12 months ago come back to me.
Tom looked a lot better than he did the last time I saw him, on the contrary he looked sad.
"Tom!" I said with a smile.
"Dr. Grey, it's great to see you!" Tom reached out and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.
"Well, I'd say great to see you too, but we're in a hospital, so I'd rather not see you!" I laughed. I turned and looked at George as Derek walked into the room.
"Tom!" Derek leaned over me and gave Tom's hand a gentle shake.
"Dr. Shepherd," Tim answered with a smile.
"Okay, who's presenting?" Derek asked us.
I turned back to George.
"Dr. O'Malley," I prompted.
George pulled out the charts.
"Tom Maynard, 41, was in here 12 months ago for removal of a pole that was completely puncturing his upper abdomen; he has had a left kidney, spleen and partial liver removal; the pole has ruptured one part of the spine which needed to be fused…" George reported. "Today, however, he is complaining of headaches and pain in the fusion area."
"Thank you Dr. O'Malley," Derek said.
"Dr. O'Malley, can you take Tom to CT and then order an MRI," I asked. "I may get Dr. Grey to go with you; you can show her the files from last time Tom was here,"
"Dr. Grey," Tom spoke up.
I turned to him.
"Yes?"
Tom took my hand.
"Can you show them Bonnie's file?" he asked. "I just want them to know why I'm alive today…"
I nodded.
"Of course," I answered.
My interns left the room and I turned back to Tom with a sad look.
"Dr. Grey," he said with a sigh.
I smiled at him weakly.
"I know that you did everything you could…" Tom said softly.
I nodded.
"Love wasn't enough…" I said in response.
Tom shook his head.
"No," he told me. "Heaven just needed another angel…"
I blinked back tears and turned to Derek who gave me a smile that could always make me feel better.
We left the room and Derek stopped me in the hallway.
"Meredith," he took a gentle grip of my shoulders. "Are you okay? I know this is hard…"
"Uh…" I wiped my tears away. "Have you called home this morning?"
Derek shook his head.
"She's fine, Lucy is well trained…" he told me. Lucy was Charlotte's nanny.
"I know, but Charlie…well she can be a little bit of a handful," I replied.
Derek leaned in, cupped his hands around my face and leaned in to kiss me.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked with a very concerned look on his face.
I nodded.
"I'm fine!" I answered. "Now, why don't you go clip some aneurysms or open up some brains?" I joked.
Derek chuckled.
"Wanna meet in the on call room later?" he asked. "We can try out the new bed!"
I started to laugh.
"I'm walking away!" I turned on my heels and laughed as I walked back down the hall.
Momentarily I entered the viewing room of CT where I met Derek and George.
"What are we looking at?" I asked.
Derek shook his head sadly.
"There is a nerve that is pressing on the fusion…" he said. "It is causing the pain in his lumbar…the headaches, on the other hand are caused by this…" he pointed to the image.
"Is that a…" I looked closely.
"Massive clot…" George said.
"It's travelling towards his brain…meaning…" Derek started.
"He is going to stroke out…" I finished.
I looked through the glass and saw the nurse rushing over to Tom.
"Code Blue!" she shouted. "He's crashing!"