A/N: No, your eyes aren't playing tricks on you. I am actually updating! I know its been ridiculously long, but I hope you've stuck with me. I do intend on seeing this through. We're more than half way, there's no stopping now!

DISCLAIMER: Instant Star isn't mine. If it was, trust me, the finale would have gone much differently. Much. Differently.

Chapter 16

It was a week after the decision to make a music video for You and I Misbehaving when Jude walked into the studio. She was five minutes late for when she said she would meet Tommy, and by the looks of him, he wasn't pleased. She straightened her crumpled shirt and ran a hand through her frazzled hair. The night before had brought quite the thunderstorm, and it knocked her house's power out, and therefore, her alarm didn't go off. Her dad had yelled up ten minutes before she was supposed to leave to see if she was still home. Lucky for her, her dad had a loud voice, and she woke up just in time to throw some clothes on and grab some food.

"You're late," Tommy said shortly.

"I know," said Jude. "I'm sorry. It's only five minutes. I overslept."

"Too lazy to get out of bed?" Tommy arched an eyebrow.

"No…" Jude trailed. "My alarm didn't go off. The storm last night knocked our power out. What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" Tommy questioned harshly. "What's wrong with me is that you're late. It's unprofessional. Just because we're together doesn't mean you can take advantage of it and expect me to pick up your slack."

"What the hell?" said Jude. "Where is this coming from? It's five minutes!"

"First its five, next it'll be ten, then it'll be twenty. In the music biz, every minute counts, Harrison."

He said her last name harshly, unlike all the recent times he'd used it. Usually it was an endearment, calling each other by their surnames in a playful manner. But this was not that situation. Quincy was not messing around.

"I don't know when you got a drum stick shoved up your ass, but I'm not dealing with this," Jude decided. "You can work on your music, I'll work on mine. I'd like you out of my studio now."

"You can't do that, Harrison."

"Like hell I can't. Get out. I think Accidental Babies needs some work, doesn't it?"

Tommy glared at her and left the studio.

Once all signs of Tommy were gone from the room, Jude collapsed in her chair, head in her hands.

* * *

"Sades," Jude whined. "I don't know what to do. He's being such as ass."

She had approached her sister at her desk a few minutes prior. After Tommy had left, Jude tried to get some work done but failed spectacularly. She just couldn't get the fight out of her mind. Jude couldn't fathom why he was being so mean. She knew that Quincy could be a jerk when he wanted to be, but what reason had she given him?

"Maybe he's on his man period," Sadie suggested.

"Um…" Jude furrowed her brows, "…what?"

"His man period," Sadie replied nonchalantly.

"What the hell is a man period?"

"When ever a guy is pissy or emotional for no reason, you call it a man period. I swear, despite the lack of menstrual cycle, guys can PMS just as bad as the rest of us."

"I have never heard of that in my entire life," Jude stated in a blank voice.

"Oh, it's true. I'm telling you."

"Whatever," Jude shook her head. "Can you give me some actual advice instead of prattling about the non-existent male menstrual cycles?"

Sadie heaved a sigh. "Fine. Have you tried talking to him?"

"No. He'll probably just chew my head off for going to talk to him instead of working."

"I'm sure he'll apologize, Jude, and when he…"

Jude cut her off. "Quincy? Apologize? That'd be a treat."

"He's not as bad as you're making him out to be, Jude. You and I both know how much you love him, even if he can be a prick."

Jude nodded her head in reluctant agreement.

"As I was saying," Sadie continued, "When he does apologize, then talk to him about it. Ask him what's going on. I'm sure there's an explanation."

"Not one that'll make up for being such a prat."

"Prat?" Sadie scoffed. "What, are you British now?"

"Hush," Jude replied. "I've been watching too much BBC America."

Sadie laughed. "You've gotta take some of it off the TiVo, it's eating our space. But that's beside the point. You should try and get some work done. If Tommy wants to apologize, he's going to look for you in the studio."

Jude agreed, gave her older sister a hug, and headed back to the studio to get some work done.

* * *

Jude waited in the studio, mixing tracks for her album, hoping Tommy would come in and apologize. But he didn't show. She didn't see him at all for the rest of the day. But stubborn as she was, Jude refused to seek him out herself. So at the end of her work day, Jude simply got in the car with her dad and left. Quincy be damned.

He didn't call that night either. And of course, Jude made no effort to call him. He had been the jerk to her, not the other way around. She deserved the apology. But he made no effort to contact her. Tommy would occasionally call Sadie's cell phone, and she would pass it along to Jude, to avoid contact with Stuart on the home phone, but Tommy did no such thing. She didn't see or hear from Tommy until the next day in the studio.

Jude had school during the afternoon, so it was a long day of no contact from her supposedly devoted boyfriend. She made sure she was promptly on time when she arrived to work in the afternoon, giving him no room to snap.

But still, he was cold to her. He ragged on her every move. Her vocals weren't strong enough, her vocals were too strong. There was too much string noise. She wasn't singing from her diaphragm. The lyrics needed to change. It was like she could do nothing right, no matter how many different ways she did it. It was ridiculous. When it was time for her to go home, she stormed out of the studio, seething and brushing past Quincy.

Once again, it was a long night of no contact from Tommy.

* * *

"Let's get to work," Tommy said derisively when Jude entered the studio the next day.

"No," Jude said. "We are talking about this. I refuse to put up with your bull shit for another second. What the hell is wrong with you, Tommy? You're supposed to be my boyfriend, not my bully! Why do you keep doing this? Why are being so terrible to me? Why are you-"

Tommy cut her off, "Because I don't want to lose you!"

Jude gaped at him. "What? That…that doesn't even make sense."

Tommy exhaled loudly. "It's the week."

"The week? What week?"

"It's the week that Angie died."

Jude blinked. "Who's Angie?"

"Angie…" his words were very quiet. "Angie was my first love."

Jude stared silently at him, urging him to go on.

"She died."

A beat.

"We were young and stupid, and it was my fault. I loved her, but not enough. I loved fame more." He sighed and ran a hand across his face, "I wasn't a good person, Jude. I'm not a good person."

"You are," Jude murmured, and Tommy ignored her.

"I'm not a good person. I loved her, even though I was with Portia. I loved Angie. We were going to run away together. But I was young and stupid and blinded by fame. I couldn't go through with it. I loved being a celebrity too much. I ended it. Then she got in a car and crashed." He paused. "I never went to the funeral."

"I…I'm sorry." Jude stated. "I'm sorry that happened to you. But it doesn't make you a bad person. And it doesn't give you the right to treat me like crap."

"I know," Tommy whispered. "I'm sorry. I'm an ass. I guess I was just trying to protect myself."

"From what? Me?"

"From the fact that if you ever left it would rip me up far worse than it did with Angie. That was my darkest time. I can't go back there again."

"I'm not leaving, Tommy."

"But what if you realize I'm not enough?"

"You are. I love you. I don't…" Jude bit her lip. "I don't ever want to end this. I don't ever want to be without you."

"You say that now. But things change, Jude. You're young…"

"I may be young," Jude said. "But I'm certainly more mature than you were when you were my age. I know what I want Tommy, and I want you."

"You sure about that?" he questioned.

"Certain," Jude smiled fleetingly. "I'm really sorry for what happened, Tommy."

"Yeah," he replied gruffly. "Me too."

* * *

That evening for Jude was much different than the prior two. She talked to Tommy on the phone for a bit and fed him some excuse about being tired and heading to bed. She gave Sadie's cell back, and sat down on her bed with her song book and a pen. She already a concept in her head. She just needed lyrics.

Jude put the pen to the paper and started raining. She scrawled the title at the top in messy handwriting: You Will Make It.

* * *

Jude decided the next day that fourth period was unimportant. It was just history. Some guys fought a war, and one side conquered. So instead of going to another pointless history lesson, Jude decided to spend her time in a much more efficient manner. At the rehearsal space, putting music to her lyrics. When she got there, she tried out chord after chord on her guitar and realized why it wasn't working. This song was definitely made for the piano. So Jude headed to the elevator and made her way to the Chrome Cat instead.

Sitting down and pulling out her song book, Jude set to work, writing her song.

* * *

"Don't be mad, but I wrote a new song," Jude said when she walked into the studio that afternoon, meeting Tommy.

"Why exactly would I be upset with proficiency?"

"Um…you inspired it."

"Don't I always?" he smirked.

"Hush, Quincy. Not like that. You…yesterday inspired it. Our talk yesterday. What you told me."

Tommy quietly said, "Oh."

Jude did her best to break the tension. "But I really think it's good. I really think it's album-worthy. It's kinda long, and it's on the piano, and there's this kinda weird part where I talk over the music, and-"

Tommy cut her uncomfortable babbling off. "Let's hear it."

Jude gave him a nervous look and went inside the sound booth. She took a seat and began to play.

"Go to bed, everything's alright

Don't know the whole world's changing as you sleep through the night

Wake up slowly and it's a different world

Hear the news and the floods begin

Screams so loud but only felt within

Heart is shattered, the pieces can't be found

I feel your pain

I wrote this song for you, for you

You will make it

You will make it through

I promise you she would want you to"

Jude glanced at Tommy as she played and sang, trying to take in his reaction. His expression was stoic, every bit of his professionalism intact.

"Months go by, still living in a daze

Don't know what you've done with the last seven days

Soul is numb and life is like a dream

Helping hands but you push them away

How could they understand?

Don't wanna share your pain

Afraid to heal, cause that would mean goodbye

I feel your pain

I wrote this song for you, for you

You will make it

You will make it through

I promise you she would want you to"

Jude chanced another glance at Tommy. His expression was not as stoic as before. Slowly, the song was breaking him. Luckily, the next part was a bit more uplifting.

"One day sunlight hits a photograph and it makes you smile

The memories dance around you now and they make you smile

You're not alone

You'll never be

Just like the stars they oversee

And they whisper to you

You're still, you're still, you're still, you're still alive

I feel your pain

I wrote this song for you, for you

You will make it

You will make it through

I promise you they would want you to"

Tommy looked like he was doing okay so far. A bit emotional. But most of all, he seemed overwhelmed. Jude just hoped the next part didn't freak him out too much. She spoke the next part, not sang. It was as though Angie was talking. She said a quick prayer and started talking in a haunting voice over the piano.

"Do not stand at my grave and weep

I am not there; I do not sleep

I am a thousand winds that blow

I am the diamond glints on snow

I am the sun on ripened grain

I am the gentle autumn rain

When you awaken in the morning's hush

I am the swift uplifting rush

Of quiet birds in circled flight

I am the soft stars that shine at night

Do not stand at my grave and cry

I am not there; I did not die"

Jude finished the music, letting the last note fade. Jude stared at the keys, not daring to look at Tommy. She didn't breathe. She was silent, suddenly desperately not wanting to know his reaction. But the door to the sound booth opened, and Jude's head snapped up.

"Why'd you write it?" Tommy asked in gruff voice.

"I just…"Jude bit her lip. "It just came to me. And, well, it's all true. I just…it felt right. Is that okay?"

Tommy sighed heavily and sat down next to her on the bench. "Yeah. Yeah, it's okay. It wasn't the easiest to hear, but it will get easier. And it's a good song. Really good. Too long and too sad to be a single, but it's good. It'll be great for the album."

"You sure?" Jude asked.

"Positive."

Jude smiled gently and laid her head on Tommy's shoulder. "I missed you, you know."

"What do you mean?" Tommy inquired.

"This week," Jude elaborate. "All the distance. I missed you."

Tommy kissed her on the top of her head quickly. "I missed you too."

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