Welcome to the Outtakes!

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Ch. 16
Alex: Whistle whistle, as I walk down this dark alleyway in the dark alleyway parts of Liverpool… (THUNDER ROLLS)
Nefarious Street Gang, emerging from shadows: HaHA! STABNATION.
Alex: There you are, lads… (LIGHTNING FLASHES) Don't mind me as I reach into my coat… and pull out… FLUFFYKINS!
Nefarious Street Gang: pauses
Alex: Not so stabnationy are we now, huh?
Gang man: Put.. the dog… down… and you may yet live…
Alex: I rescued your adorable little ball of fluff from your rival gang and this is all the thanks I get? I "may yet live?" A bit disappointed in your gang man style! Now, I have a different idea…

Ch. 22
Alex: New plan for a career change, Amanda. Take notes.
Amanda: I will not be taking notes.
Alex: First step to becoming a mob boss, chew on cigar and glare at people from under brim of hat. Second step, find cement. Then bury it.
Amanda: Er…
Alex: Also, say things like "You're a dead man, Wally!"
Amanda: This will not make you a mob boss.

Alex, sings: We were both young when I first saw you!
Sirius: Yes yes, I know you think that Taylor Swift narrates your life…
Alex: Don't you worry your pretty little mind, people throw rocks at things that shine!
Sirius: … but trust me, those lyrics have nothing applicable to our relationship.
Alex: You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter!
Sirius: Your father is the most careful adult in the country and he fully endorses everything you do.
Alex: I am not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion!
Sirius: If there's barging in to be done, you'll be sending someone else in to do it.
Alex: Get me with those green eyes, baby, as the lights go down!
Sirius: Do you even know what color my eyes are?
Alex: I knew you were trouble when you walked in!
Sirius: I'm the definition of a safe bet compared to you.
Alex: She'll never know your story like I do!
Sirius: Because you SPY ON ME.
Alex: You have pointed out my flaws again, as if I don't already see them! Why you gotta be so mean?
Sirius: …
Alex: Even when you're sleeping, keep your ey-eyes open!
Sirius: What have I let into my life.

Dumbledore: The entire Slytherin Quidditch team is currently throwing punches on the field.
Alex: How odd.
Dumbledore: They keep screaming about betrayal.
Alex: Boys will be boys.
Dumbledore: You wouldn't happen to have any part in this, would you?
Alex: Violence? Surely not!
Dumbledore: eyebrow raise
Alex: I'm a lover, not a fighter.

Alex: I've never understood why you are so popular. You aren't on the Quidditch team, you aren't friendly, you aren't THAT good looking. You've really got nothing going for you!
Sirius: DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM ON THE INTERNET?

Jonathan Moore: When the day comes for me to retire from MI6 —
Alex: Oh, Dad! You don't look a day over 50!
Jonathan Moore: Thanks, I'm 42 — I can easily step down, knowing that our country is safe in the hands of a very capable member of the next generation.
Alex: Aw, shucks. You're making me blush!
Jonathan Moore: Not you. Your boyfriend.
Alex: THIS IS NEPOTISM.

More to come.