He watch as the blood spilled over his knife, and then he quietly leaned down to collect the dark pooling liquid on a feather.

"Annoying bitch. I never liked that Jasmine anyways."

He spat on her dead corpse and walked away slowly, savoring the taste of victory.

As he reached the end of the alley, a stunningly beautiful girl appeared out of nowhere and yelled his name.

"Altair! Altair!"

He quickly turned and was shocked by her golden hair that flowed down her back like a waterfall. Her purple eyes gazed into his with such... innocence...

Her slender hand grasped his calloused one tightly as she looked up at him. Altair proceeded to pass out from dehydration.

He woke up realizing that blond women weren't native to his land and he had passed out from dehydration. The girl who had called to him was merely a hallucination, a product of his lack of water.

He sat, in his bed (for lack of continuity), and looked around the room. Then he looked up at the starry sky.

"Where did my roof go?"

He proceeded to jump through the hole, but hit his head because there was, in fact, a roof. Amazingly, he had x-ray vision!

He felt his vision swimming as he experienced another hallucination. This time, it was a blond woman in a red dress who came up to him and started rubbing his back.

"Very well done, Gaius..." She purred in his ear, giving him an instant erection.

Then he stopped. "Wait... my name isn't Gaius!"

He woke up (again) realizing (again) that blonds in skimpy red dresses would not show up for about another millennia.

He sighed and stood to gather his things. Then he realized, that he had nothing to gather. And that he was, in fact, in love with the man next door. The muscular young man. His name was Link.

Altair opened his door and found Link standing there, shirtless and about to knock. Instead, he knocked on Altair's head, giving him an instant erection.

The assassin proceeded to pull Link inside and have massive sexual relations with him.

Altair left Link on the bed, sexually satisfied and jumped out the window. Again, a random girl who was extremely attractive and good at everything came up to him and looked at him. Altair, being tired of stupid sexually charged conversations and scenes with these girls, proceeded to drag her into an alley and bone her up against the wall. She enjoyed this immensely, especially when he held a knife to her throat. She exploded from his massive orgasm.

The End