Author's Note: This is based on the song Zzyzx Road by Stone Sour. It's just something I've had in my head for a while and needed to get it out of my system. Just an excuse for a little Pyro/Iceman fluff.
Disclaimer: Neither the x-men nor the song are mine. I'm just having a little fun with them.
Tired
I don't know how else to put this
It's taken me so long to do this
I'm falling asleep and I can't see straight
I've been driving for hours. I think. I have no idea what time it is – the digital clock on the dashboard is nothing but a blur. I know I should stop, but I'm so close now. There's no point in stopping. I'm almost there...
My muscles feel like a melee
My body's curled in a U-shape
I put on my best but I'm still afraid
I've almost turned back at least twice. Back to where I'm not sure. I have no-where else to go after all. But to go there...I'm still not sure it's a good idea...
Propped up by lies and promises
Saving my place as life forgets
Maybe its time I saw the world
I thought I had it all figured out. Fight for mutant rights – fight for my rights. Stand up to those who would lock us up, stick us on registers, parade us around like the freaks we are, even cure us. So I fought.
And I killed.
Am I really any better than they are?
I'm only here for a while
But patience is not my style
And I'm so tired that I gotta go
I'm so tired, and not just of driving. I have been fighting my whole life. With my parents, my teachers, even my so-called friends. No-one's ever wanted me. I've never belonged anywhere. Every now and then someone takes pity on me or wants to make the most of my talent. But no-one wants me. No-one ever did...
What am I supposed to hide now?
What am I suppose to do?
Did you really think I wouldn't see this through
Xavier's mansion. It looks a lot smaller than I remember.
I almost felt at home here once. I thought I'd finally found somewhere I could belong. Surrounded by other mutants – I wasn't just some freak anymore. I had a roof over my head, all the food I could eat...and I had a friend. A best friend.
Tell me I should stick around for you
Tell me I could have it all
I'm still too tired to care and I gotta go
I don't know how the hell Bobby and I ever did become friends. I mean – fire and ice. We were as different as could be, but somehow, we did become so close. He was everything to me. Friend, classmate, brother, roommate...secret crush...
Then she came along. I mean... I knew he wasn't gay, that wasn't the problem. It was the time he spent with her...the time he no longer spent with me...
I get to go home in one week
But I leaving home in three weeks
They throw me a bone just to pick me dry
I thought when I went to the Brotherhood that things had improved. I had the freedom I was never allowed at the mansion. And I didn't have to watch Bobby and Marie and their endless thumb-war-I'm-gonna-kiss-you-oh-but-I-can't little incidents. But the Brotherhood's not home. It's just a temporary refuge in between killing missions.
I'm following suit and directions
I crawl up inside for protection
I'm told what to do and I don't know why
Why do I do it? I have no idea anymore. We haven't achieved anything. The cure still exists and people are still terrified of us. I wonder why. So what? We take over the world? Mutant superiority over the human race? Is human superiority not why I hate them so much?
I'm over existing in limbo
I'm over the myths and placebos
I don't really mind if I just fade away
I don't understand anymore. I don't know what I'm fighting for. I have no-one. I am no-one.
I'm ready to live with my family
I'm ready to die in obscurity
'Cause I'm so tired that I gotta go
So here I am. Back at Xavier's mansion, sitting calmly on the medical table. You all look at me as if I've gone mad. Maybe I have. But I mean it. I'm done. I have nothing left to fight for. The fire has gone out.
Where am I supposed to hide now?
What am I suppose to do?
You still don't think I'm going see this through
Still you all look uncertain. So I repeat my wish.
"Cure me."
Tell me I'm a part of history
Tell me I can have it all
I'm still to tired to care and I gotta go
I look into your eyes – those icy blue eyes that from a distance look so cold but when you really look into them they are the most beautiful, vibrant, expressive eyes. I could have stared into them for hours...although that may have been a bit of a giveaway as to the feelings I for so long hid away. You once commented that you could see a fire burning in my eyes...literal flames dancing about. I wonder if that fire is still there. It doesn't feel like it.
Oh yeah
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah.
Still too tired to care and I gotta go
Still too tired to care and I gotta go
Still too tired to care and I gotta go
Hank prepares the needle. Big fucker of a thing, but I'm too tired to object to the size of it. In the grand scheme of things...who cares how big the goddamn needle is?
"Now, this may sting a little..." the big blue guy warns me quietly, lifting my arm to give me the injection.
"Whatever..." I mutter.
Yeah, yeah
Still to tired to care and I gotta go
Go home
Still to tired to care and I gotta go
Yeah, yeah
Still to tired to care and I gotta go
It more than stings. I flinch as the needle pierces my arm, inhaling sharply as I wait for that accursed cure that I once fought so strongly against to flow into my veins. I can't help but close my eyes, a wave of nausea sweeping over me...
"It's frozen."
Hank's voice brings my attention quickly back to the room. I look down to the syringe to find the plunger still high...the liquid inside frozen solid. My eyes widen as I look towards the ever so subtle source of cold in the room. You just smile softly, those beautiful blue eyes sparkling with emotion. I open my mouth, but nothing comes out. You laugh quietly and move towards me. My breath catches as suddenly icy cold fingers cup gently around my face, pulling me forward into a soft, lingering kiss. The rest of the room disappears as I close my eyes, slipping my arms around your shoulders. Somewhere I feel that old spark reignite.
"Please don't leave me again John," you murmur as we finally part. "Pyro."
I open my eyes and find myself looking straight into those pale blue eyes, so full of concern, hurt, regret, fear, caring, compassion, confusion and so much more. Icy cold fingers trace down my cheek, a small smile playing on your lips as you just stare back into my eyes. I cannot help but return the smile, that little spark bursting once more into a raging fire as I see the one emotion in those beautiful blue eyes that I have for so long craved. Pulling you close again, I capture your lips in mine, not caring who – if anyone – is still in the room with us.
"I love you Bobby..." I whisper softly, reluctant to let go, keeping our faces barely apart. I feel those surprisingly warm, soft lips curl into a smile.
"I love you too John..."