(A/N) I know I should be working on my other stuff, but this just popped into my mind and I couldn't let if go.

Okay, it didn't sound like a bad idea at the time.

What am I talking about, you say? - Well, it all started about four hours ago... (Queue the corny fuzzy flashback borders)

I was sitting on the couch playing Halo. The big boss on level six just came out of the ground coming at me with weird lobster hands when Carlisle started to talk to me.

The bad thing about being a vampire is that it's pretty much impossible to tune people out. Um... not that I wanted to tune Carlisle out. Of course not... I was just... um, stating that fact.

So as I was saying, Carlisle started talking.

"Emmett, it's your turn." He stated.

"For what?" I asked playing dumb while shooting the little bugs on the screen.

"Emmett..." He said in that tone only a parent can use when their kids are acting out in some way.

"What!?" I asked incredulously, I really wanted him to leave. This boss was hard! (and if Jasper and Rosalie find out that I almost lost I'd never hear the end of it.)

"Alice did it last week, and now it's your turn." Carlisle walked around the couch and approached my precious X-box 360. The only one that has lasted for two weeks straight without being broken or thrown out the window or ... ripped to shreds and hidden in the empty kitchen cabinets which no one has found yet... Hey, I saw nothing!

"Emmett, do you want me to turn off the console or are you going to listen to me?" He stepped in front of the TV.

"Hey! YOu're... you're!" I leaned trying to get my view of the boss. "I... I have to beat him! MovE!"

But it was to late. A red tint covered the screen and I was dead. Dead as only a virtual dead guys can.

I humphed and crossed my arms in defiance.

Carlisle shook his head.

"You killed me." I mumbled.

"Emmett!" Carlisle shrieked shocked. "That was over sixty years ago! I thought you would have gotten over it! Rosalie made me. It's all her fault. I thought you liked this life..."

I snapped my head in his direction and crinkled my eyebrows. "No. No. No. Not that. You just killed me in the game. I'm dead see." I pointed the TV wear the camera was covering every angle of my dismembered virtual body.

"Oh." Carlisle shrugged.

He's so old school.

"Well... I'm gonna go and see what Edward's up to." I quickly got up and headed for the stairs, hoping Carlisle would forget what he was going to tell me to do.

"Wait!"

Dang it.

"I'm not finished with you." Carlisle's authoritative voice took over and it scared the shit out of me..., which is strange, because I don't have shit. I haven't taken a dump in over sixty years.

"It wasn't me!" I held up my hands and looked innocent in an annoying way.

"It's your turn to mow." Carlisle finished his thought shaking his head in disappointment.

I groaned.

"Emmett." There's that tone again.

"But... why do we have to mow??"

"Because son, we have a yard. And we have grass on our yard. And the grass grows on our yard. And it gets messy and ugly if the grass keeps growing on our yard without cutting it. So... son, that's why we mow."

"But it's sooooo slow!!" I whined. "I just don't see the point in it. No one ever comes here."

"Are you calling Bella no one?"

"Yea, I mean no. Because she's practically one of us. And... It's just so slow. Isn't there a faster way? I mean, that mower we got looks like an awesome beast but there's got to be a better way."

"Sorry, Emmett. But no. Things take time. Not everything happens instantly like things do in our world. And since we're trying to live in 'there' world there are things we must do."

"But Why?!" I through my hands up in the air again.

"Well, because son, we have a yard. And we have grass on that yard, and the grass-"

"Al right. Al right! I'm going, I'm going." I slinked around Carlisle and into the garage.

You see how I got mangled into this? Geez! Parents! They are so manipulative.

Okay, so I go where the mower is. I have to admit. It does look like an awesome beast of beasts.

So I got a little excited and decided this wasn't going to be so bad after all.

Okay... so just picture this. Me... on a mower... puttsing around going one mile per hour, shoulders hunched over so I could fit in there... just puttsing around on the lawn.

I cannot begin to explain how dorky I felt.

I couldn't take it any longer when Edward drove up with Bella.

"Um... Emmett...?" Bella said hesitantly over the roar of the mower knowing that I could still hear.

"Shut up." I snarled and Edward laughed at me leading Bella into the house.

"Come on Bella. Let's leave Emmett to his... puttsing." They both giggled crossing the threshold.

"Memmememieusmemew, stupid gypsy mind reader." I mocked Edward.

That was it. I couldn't do this anymore.

So I stopped the blades and put the little whatsamacallsit towards the bunny and away from the turtle and raced to the garaged where my boo-baby was tinkering with the cars.

"Hey babe." I said coming in the garage on the mower. Rose took one look at me in my position and burst out laughing.

This was getting really old. "Yea, yea, ha-ha, very funny. Hold on." I got out of it and ran towards Rose.

"Wow." Was all she said. Looking at the mower and back to me.

I sighed and let her work a little more, figuring how to say this.

"Babe?"

"Mmhmm?" She said with a wrench in her hands and a screwdriver between her lips. Gosh she's hot.

"Have I told you how beautiful you are today?" I inched near her and wrapped my arms around her waist.

She spit the screwdriver out and smiled at me. "No... You haven't."

"Well... you are so beautiful. I don't know how everybody else stands it." I whispered tactfully in her ear.

I felt her smile under my cheeks... but then it turned into a frown.

She wiggled out of my grasped and looked at me with one eyebrow raised.

"What do you want?"

I sighed. No way of getting out of this one once I was caught.

"I was wondering if you would be interested in working on this mower... maybe... give it an... upgrade..." I trailed off.

My dear Rose smirked, picked her screwdriver up, and passed by me, whispering in my ear.

"You owe me one."

Under my breath I muttered. "If I had a nickel..."