Sora and Kairi were dragging Yuffie around the island. Riku watched them walking together, and smiled a little. He liked seeing the three of them together.
"How did I luck out?" His eyes followed them as they jumped in Sora's boat. He'd told them he wanted a little time to think. He liked to sit and watch the sun slide across the sky.
He sat on the Paopu tree, feeling as if he'd gone from the end of the world back to the beginning. He couldn't believe Yuffie had managed to drag him to come back home. To get him to swallow his pride and stay for a while. Somehow, he still felt like he belonged here. After all those years away from home, that surprised him. Perhaps nothing ever really changed. It just grew older.
Where had this all begun?
Riku could remember very clearly the day he had met Yuffie. He was wondering if that was where this had all started.
-annoying time skip-
Riku leaned against the stone wall, letting it support his weight. His head was tilted upward as he watched the drifting clouds with dreary disinterest.
He took a deep breath to steady himself, pulling away from the wall. He stood still, gazing up at the sky. He closed his eyes and released a long, tired sigh.
His eyes had grown weary of seeing. Every familiar sight in this world of sand-colored buildings, red roofs, and cobble-stone streets stirred up feelings he had been trying so hard to escape. He hated the way those old emotions remained, suffocating him. He had thought that by now they would no longer suit him.
He thought he'd grown up. But he was beginning to wonder if he never really had.
He opened his eyes slowly, as if he had just woken up.
"One," He started counting under his breath, letting himself fall between the cracks in the cobble-stones. Letting himself fall into the silence between the numbers. "Three."
"Four." On ten, he promised himself he'd turn around and look at it. He wondered if his nightmares had stretched it, distorted it into something that still held the lingering scent of the fear he always told himself he'd left behind.
He would know, if he'd only turn around and look at it. "Five."
"Six." He let the word fall into the air, passing through his gritted teeth followed by a lengthy, weary sigh. The wind laughed, running away with his breath and tossing it to the sky. The sadness, the exhaustion, however, remained locked in his heart.
"You're too scared to look. Too weak," He muttered to himself, shutting his eyes tightly. He was frustrated by his own weakness. He hated how vulnerable he was. No matter how much stronger he'd gotten, he still couldn't escape the fear that clung to the darkest corners of his heart, too afraid to embrace the light.
Simply put, he could not bring himself to turn around and look. So he stood there, by all appearances a frightened idiot frozen in place unable to do anything but sigh and talk to himself.
"Is there something wrong with you?" A voice assaulted his eardrums, breaking the silence. A body quickly followed the voice as a girl stepped into his line of vision. A few long, fast strides brought her right in front of him.
He wondered, fruitlessly, that if he closed his eyes she'd go away. He blinked rapidly, so as not to arouse her suspicion. He tried to mask his severe disappointment that she was still there after he had composed himself.
"You could say that." His voice was louder than he thought it would be. It hung in the air, smooth and confident, bearing no sign that he had not spoken to another person for such a long time.
She tossed him a strange look. One that spoke of curiosity mixed with a sprig of bewilderment.
"Where have you been hiding?" The girl asked, mischief dancing in her unfamiliar eyes. He started a little, looked up at her suddenly, gasping. She laughed as if she hadn't seen anything funnier all day. Perhaps she hadn't. Or maybe she just let everything wash over her, enjoying it all, like a child bobbing up and down in the waves, laughing as the water tickled her chin.
"I haven't been hiding." He pushed the words of his tongue vehemently, trying to convince himself more than her.
She laughed again. It was not a regal sound nor a feminine one. Having grown up with Kairi, Riku had thought that all girls laughed like her. Her hair falling in soft, red triangles against her cheek, as she shook with laughter. A sound like sweet music penetrating the air. This girl's laugh was not like silver bells tinkling.
But Riku found he liked it, nonetheless. It was a sound like the sun on a warm day. A sound that basked in its own joy and was determined to spread it to the shadows at the roots of the palm trees that grew together in thick clumps. That was why the sun moved. To spread the joy that filled her far past the brim.
His throat ached with all the laughter that was trapped in it. It escaped, rumbling in his throat. It tingled strangely on his tongue. He wasn't even aware of why he'd started. Or even when. Perhaps it was because she was here.
He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt better.
"I guess you're not from around here. I happen to be the Great Ninja Yuffie and I know everyone who lives here." She pointed at her chest with a vaguely pompous flourish.
"O-Oh," was all he managed to say. He was hoping she wouldn't ask who he was.
"Lemme see…" She rubbed her chin, as if she was deep in though. "I bet you're Riku."
He stared at her, his mouth hanging open a little.
"Sora's always talked about you," Yuffie explained with a tiny chuckle. "So you can close your mouth now. If it's open because you've just realized there's a bea-u-tiful girl in front of you, you may shut it as well." Her voice rose strangely on the "U" and she just stood there, grinning at him, as if she'd just said the cleverest thing in the world.
There was something he liked about her but he wasn't quite sure what.
"You're…" He searched for a word to describe her, but he couldn't find it.
She shrugged. "Yuffie?" She offered after a moment's pause.
Since nothing else seemed to fit, he went with it, nodding a little.
He found himself relaxing almost imperceptibly. He himself had barely realized it. Then, suddenly a hand smashed against his face, shooting pain into his cheek and sending a flash across his eyes.
"What was-?" He rubbed his face, watching her. Her eyes had a sharp, almost angry spark in them.
"You know what that was for." She cut him off. "I'm not sorry, too. This is my home and it's my job to protect it! Remember that!"
His hand fell from his face and his gaze was fixed on a spot just over her head.
"I understand. I'd hate me too if I was you." His voice grew quiet. "I hate myself sometimes, too."
He wasn't sure why he'd let that slip. He didn't just go around pouring his heart all over strangers. He didn't even say that sort of thing to Sora. Riku was a bit afraid of what he'd say.
It was as if Yuffie was coming out of a trance. She was bouncing on the balls of her feet, rocking back and forth with a smile on her face.
"I don't even know you. Why would I had you?"
Riku stared at her in confusion. He blinked a few times and shook his head. She was still there, dancing in place and watching him with that blank grin of hers.
"I guess I'd better give you a clean slate, right? I think you might deserve a second chance," Yuffie observed him carefully. "Why are you here, anyway?"
He smiled at the way she never seemed to give her enough time to breath, let alone answer her endless stream of questions. He was shocked by the way all her questions seemed to cut straight to his heart.
His eyes were drawn to a bird flying across the sky. He watched the bird dip and sway, spreading his feathers like fingertips as if to touch the clouds. Riku always had the feeling that flying was for the purest of hearts. Those with light burdens and free souls. He knew he'd never fly.
"You gonna answer?" Yuffie's voice sliced straight though his thoughts.
Riku lowered his head, tucking his chin below his collar to hide his smile and his scarlet-tinged cheeks. Thought consumed him once more. He sucked in his cheeks and furrowed his brow, searching for the answer.
"Oh," He started, his voice barely above a whisper. He swallowed nervously. "I wanted to see…the castle."
"Then, look at it." Yuffie pointed just over his shoulder. "It's right behind you, you know."
"I do." He sighed a little, wishing for his old confidence. He closed his eyes again. His leg was beginning to ache. Whenever he stood too long, the feeling in his leg reminded him of that night.
The driving rain pressing his hair against his face. Falling against the ground, his leg sending pain sweeping through him.
"What does it look like?" He could almost feel the soft cotton cloth pressed against his eyes, knotted in his hair. Once again, he could feel that twisted guilty sensation that shocked his heart every second he had realized that it hurt to see the light. "What do you see?"
"I see the future!" She threw her arms in the air grandly as if to embrace the glittering generality she had tossed so casually into the wind.
"What? How?" He was certain that if he turned around, he would only see ruin.
"We're gonna rebuild it! It'll be better than ever!" She smashed her fist into her open palm. She glowed with determination.
"Could I help?" Riku turned around, eyes closed tightly.
"Of course."
He couldn't help but smile as his eyes fluttered open.
Maybe it was the smile that masked everything. Maybe it warmed his heart and made him see everything a little differently.
He could see exactly what she meant.
"Thank you."