THE TIME: Seventh Year

THE SCENE: DADA with the new Prof…Oliver Crich, werewolf, womanizer, disgraced Auror and alleged former Death Eater.

THE SETUP: Crich thinks he smells a rat about what may be going on between Hermione

and his old rival, Severus Snape.

The door opened and Hermione rushed in, conspicuous by her lateness.

"It's not like you to be late, Miss Granger." Professor Crich, commented.

"Sorry, Professor, I was in the library and I lost track of time." Hermione explained.

"You'll have to attend detention with me, this evening." Crich told her.

Hermione went a whiter shade of pale.

"But Professor, I have my work to do for Professor Snape. I won't have time to do my homework and get some sleep if I have to attend detention. Sometimes Professor Snape keeps me at work for hours."

Harry swallowed a laugh.

"He keeps her on the job half the night." He whispered to Ginny.

Professor Crich seemed to see some humour in Hermione's protest, as well.

"Well, in light of Professor Snape's relentless driving of you, Miss Granger, I'll let your lateness go, this time. But, if you're late again, you'll be spending some of those hours with me, as well. You can take your seat, now." He replied.

She sat down with Ron and Ginny and Harry.

"What's withdrawal really like, Harry?" Ron asked.

"I'd rather vomit slugs for a week." Harry replied.

"If you give my sister a round of applause you will be." Ron rejoined.

They all chuckled into their books.

Except Hermione. She wasn't laughing and she looked distracted.

It made Harry wonder if Snape had a free period, and what the hell she had been doing in the library.

"Doing a little research with Professor Snape?" Harry asked.

"Shut up, Harry." Hermione hissed.

Snape noticed that Granger was unusually quiet that evening as they worked, and she was distracted enough to spill a solution of larks' tongues in aspic all over the table.

As she cleaned up, Snape took off his lab robe and hung it up.

"That's enough for today, Granger. Tell me what's bothering you."

Hermione hung up her lab robe, fiddled with her tie, pulled at the hem of her shirt, and smoothed out her skirt.

"You haven't even changed your clothes. You never come to the lab in your uniform, not since before you made me your business proposal. It's that bastard Crich, isn't it? He's been at you, hasn't he?" Snape snarled.

"I wouldn't say he's been at me. But I won't go to detention with him, Snape. I won't. There's something about the way he looks at me and all those double entendres. He's got this sort of Fred West look in his eye. I won't go."

"You're fucking well right you won't go! You've never had a detention in your life! You're the goddamn Head Girl for fuck's sake? What does Crich want to give you a detention for?"

"He says the next time I'm late…"

"Oh, the next time you're late! If you happen to walk in as the gongs are sounding he'll give you a detention so he can get you alone and back you into a corner and threaten to bite you to get you to lift up your skirt for him! Well, fuck him! I know what he's up to! I told Albus not to let that fucking degenerate teach here, with all these young girls about! He's a real sick fuck, Crich is! He claims he's reformed, he claims he was forced to do what he did at those Dark Revels, but I've seen that cunt in action and he looked like he was having a bloody good time to me! He's doing it just to spite me, you know. I'll kill him! If he touches you, I will kill him! By the eye of Balor, I will! I'll kill him with me bare hands! I'll fucking tear that werewolf bastard limb from limb! I'll bear him to death with his own arms!" Snape raged.

Hermione had never seen him so furious.

His face was red, the veins in the side of his head and his neck bulged and his black eyes looked positively shark-like. He pounded the table as he raved and spit flew out of his mouth along with his angry words.

"Snape, calm down. You can't just go and kill another teacher. At the very least you'll lose your job. Please, Severus. You'll go to Azkaban for life on murder. And we need you here. We need you for the war." Hermione reminded him.

"If he gives you a detention, don't go. Under no circumstances. After classes, you report directly to the Headmaster. If Crich ever approaches you in a threatening way, I want you to tell me, immediately."

"You won't just kill him?"

"No. I won't just kill him."

Hermione didn't believe Snape for a second.

She knew him better than that.

Interested, HG/SS shippers and Lil' Lola Blue fans?

Then Severus, Hermione and I need your support at this link.

/s/4272643/1/HarryPotter&theNakedLunchForTwo

The characters are just as I've set them up in "The Unbearable Lightness of Being Severus Snape", and HG/SS is the main ship. No Slash, HP/SS is, uh, well you could call it mentoring, but Snape might be pissed off at the mere suggestion.

If you liked this teaser and you want much, much more sex, dope, cheap thrills and black humour, and plenty of Snape, Snape, Snape, click the link and find out what happens to Snape, Hermione and Harry in Year 7.

Act now! Quantities are limited!