Misunderstandings
DISCLAIMER: Nothing new to say people.
Author's Note: Hello loves, and apologies. My fic for today is not part of the multi-chap. I know I promised before, but I didn't get to sit down and write today. Too busy, so I typed up an old fic to post. But fear not, it is still full of much KuroFai love! It's TRC KuroFai, which I will call YouYu to differentiate between that and AU KuroFai. Here we go…
PART ONE:
Fai had found it very humorous at the time. That fist night with the group, when, as luck had it, he ended up sleeping in the same room as the ninja. And god, the guy was gorgeous, did he mention that? He'd been staring at him all that day. To Fai's intense satisfaction, he also had felt the ninja's eyes on him earlier. At least Fai knew for certain he was into guys.
And it was even more perfect, since while it was obvious that the sexy ninja found him attractive, he could not stand Fai's personality. He hated it, actually, and Fai did all he could to encourage this. It was more than perfect; there was no chance of any kind of meaningful relationship, no chance of any kind of attachment.
So, when on the next world, circumstance forced them to stay in the same room again, Fai found it hilarious. And then it happened again after that, and again. Fate has one cruel sense of humor, no?
Of course, with the obvious physical attraction, and the constantly being thrown into the same room together, it wasn't long before something happened. Though, it was more from mutual need and lack of other options than anything else. And afterwards, Fai always slipped from Kurogane's bed and into his own. It was entirely meaningless, and both would deny it even happened during daylight hours.
Then there was the one world were the room they were forced to share had only one bed in it. And Fai found this much less humorous. He needed to be able to retreat, to keep his clearly defined boundaries drawn. The idea of actually sleeping next to someone was disturbing to say the least.
But this was Kurogane. So naturally nothing changed. After they finished, Fai would slide as far away as he could, and the ninja would do the same. It was no different than before. Except for the sex, they had no physical contact. And neither one was going to change that.
But there stay in that world was unusually lengthy. And each night, they had to sleep next to one another. Soon, Fai was noticing a change. Before, the second they were done, Kurogane would let him go, and he would shift as far from Fai as the bed would allow. Now, it seemed to him that every time it was taking the ninja longer to release him. He would hold him a few seconds now, almost imperceptible seconds. But the seconds did exist.
Then there was the one night when he did not let go. Fai waited, and waited, yet he only felt Kurogane's slow breathing and muscled arms wrapped around him. Finally, he shoved against his chest forcefully to and demanded to know what the ninja thought he was doing.
"Holding you." He replied in a steady voice.
So Fai demanded to know just why he thought he had any right to be doing so, and just why was he doing it in the first place.
"Because I want to, damn it." He said simply.
But they both knew that the reply was anything but simple. No, there was a lot more in that sentence than the words implied. He wanted to hold Fai, which meant he wanted to be close to him. It meant that he wanted more than just a physical relationship. It meant he cared. And it meant that Fai's perfectly crafted plan to not become close to anyone had failed miserably.
A substantial part of Fai's intricately plotted illusions was collapsing around him. What had he missed? He had done all he could to push the man away. He did his best to annoy him with all his might. He called him only names he hated embarrassed him as much as possible. When had they crossed this line? When had he stopped hating him?
Fai grabbed a pillow and a blanket and left. The next morning Sakura was curious why he was sleeping on the couch. He could not think of a good enough lie, for once in his life.
The rest of the time in that world, Fai pretended that the events of that night hadn't occurred. He treated Kurogane just the same as ever. But every night he slept on the couch.
There was one night when, after the children were asleep, he found himself alone with the ninja. He had been avoiding this, since it made things all the more awkward. He wanted to get out quickly.
"Well Kuro-pon, I sure am tired! I think I'll go to bed now." With that he gave an exaggerated yawn.
"I'll wait for you." Kurogane said.
"Ne, Kuro-wanko, what are you talking about?" Fai said, feigning ignorance.
"I'll wait as long as I can, idiot." And then the ninja silently left the room.
They spent three more days in that world. In all that time, Fai never went back to his bedroom.
He spent a long time thinking. Just pondering the implications, pondering how he really felt about Kurogane. Did he actually care for him? And if he did, (he wasn't prepared to admit to himself yet that he did) what would happen? If he let himself get close, would he hurt Kurogane, like he had hurt everyone else he had loved?
There was that word, and that thought. The though of Kurogane being harmed by anyone, himself included, sent chills down his spine. And the thought of that…word, about the ones he loved…
The next world, he promised himself, since he was still to afraid to approach him now.
Wait just a bit longer, Kuro-chan.
PART TWO:
"Here is the key to your room, Fai-kun," Sakura smiled at him in her sweetly innocent way. "Our old clothes were worth so much here, that Kurogane-san could book four rooms! Isn't that wonderful? You can have your own room, you won't have to share with Kurogane-san."
Four rooms? Had he taken too long after all? Had Kurogane stopped waiting? He had expected the return of the one room, two beds arrangement.
"Thank you, Sakura-hime. I think I'll go out a while. I won't be back soon, so don't wait for me." Then Fai took the key, and left.
He felt like crying, or screaming, or cursing the world, or cursing himself. He finally figured it all out, and it was too late. Of course, Kurogane couldn't be expected to wait forever, but a bit longer than this, surely.
He wanted a drink. Badly. He wanted to lose himself fully. So he walked, as far as he could. Walked till he almost forgot how to get back to the hotel. Then farther, until he was sure he would be out of range of Mokona's translation abilities. He wanted to lose himself entirely. He didn't even want to understand when people spoke to him.
He found what he was searching for. A greasy little hole in the wall bar, in a bad neighborhood, a place that promised hard liquor in dirty glasses, no questions asked.
He entered. He planed to communicate his wishes to the bartender by pointing and saying 'that one.' He had picked up enough Japanese for that.
He sat down, and a stocky, balding, muscular man, the bartender, approached him.
"What do you want?" the man asked.
Fai was startled. His eyes widened. He had understood him.
"Hello" Fai tentatively in Celestrian.
"What you drinking?" the bartender said insistently.
There was no doubt in his mind; the language was Fai's own. He almost groaned. This world, this one had to be the one were the culture was like his own. After so many places, they finally came to his home's parallel. When he least wanted to be reminded. Fate just had to kick him when he was down.
However, he was in bar. This might actually turn out to be a good thing. Depended on just how similar the culture was.
"Vodka?" Fai asked.
The bald man nodded, and Fai was actually glad this world was like his own. Vodka, after all, was very strong.
PART THREE:
The world was spinning out of focus. He felt dizzy, and empty. He had tried to fill that empty place with the alcohol, to no avail. It had taken him a long time to get back, in this state. Now he was fumbling with the key in the look on his door. If the door didn't move so damn much, it might be simpler. Or was that the spinning?
He eventually succeeded. He pushed the door open. He did not bother with the light. He could see the outline of the bed, and merely wanted to sprawl across it and pass out.
He stumbled forward, and collapsed on the bed.
"What the hell?" an angry voice cried. Fai than became aware that the bed was already occupied. Kurogane had jerked awake, when Fai collapsed on top of him.
"Kuro-chu…?" Fai slurred. "What are you doing here?"
"Well, I was sleeping, until someone fell on me. You smell like a damn bar. You haven't been out like this have you?" His voice betrayed his sudden concern at the though of Fai walking around in such a state.
"Why is Kuro-Kuro here? Why isn't he in his room? I thought he got four, since he was done waiting for me. I thought that he got four, cause he was sick of me…"
" The hell? I got four because that money grubbing Yuko-parallel Hotel owner insisted that there where four of us, so we needed four rooms. Then you took so damned long getting back, I had to go pretend I lost my key! And she charged me for the spare key. And why didn't you just ask me that, instead of going and doing this to yourself?"
Fai found this much funnier than it was in his condition.
"You aren't lucid enough to comprehend anything I just said are you?" Kurogane asked him. "Try to understand this: I said I'd wait as long as I could. I could have waited forever. Now, stop being such a moron."
Fai laughed loudly.
"Silly Kuro-silly! You couldn't wait forever, you would get hungry eventually!" Fai found this statement very logical, at the time.
"Moron. You're going to be hung over, and I don't want to hear you whine about it." But with that he pulled Fai into his arms and laid them both down. He yanked the blankets over them, and Fai snuggled closer.
"I figured it out Kuro-run." Fai said suddenly.
"What?" Kurogane really hoped Fai would shut up and go to sleep soon, since he was making little sense.
" I figured out that I love you…" he sighed, and then closed his eyes.
Author's Note: Still seeking a Beta reader