Duality
"We never seem to get a break, do we?" Marion sighed and put her head down on Indy's chest. It was a stupid gesture, anyway. Just a remnant of times long gone.
But…it had all felt so current. Even when they were busy fighting for their lives, she could still feel the spark they'd ignited so long ago. The old burn was there, simmering, and she knew he had to feel it. But all the other old feelings, and old problems, came with it. The quest was all-consuming, Marion just a side note in the life of Dr. Indiana Jones.
Her head was growing heavy and she lifted it to feel his lips again, always the possibility of it being the last time. The sense of peril was simply too exhausting and her eyelids began to flutter closed. Then she felt his lips move against her, slowly at first, then more passionately. Now wide awake, she felt his mouth curl in to a smile.
"If you insist."
His voice rumbled against her chest, deep and as soothing as it used to be. Her heart ached in a way it hadn't in years, and the trail of his hand along her back set her skin on fire. The sensation in the pit of her stomach was there, the one she remembered feeling but hadn't truly felt in what had to be forever. It had been a long, long time since Marion had loved Indy, but now she was starting to believe that she had never stopped.
His right hand cupped firmly around her behind, while his left ran through her hair. She felt wild as an animal, unleashed and desperately trying to devour his mouth. When he pulled it away to take a breath she was irritated, even angry that he would deny her when she so obviously needed this. Needed him.
No. She didn't need Indiana Jones. She'd spent the last ten years proving it to herself and she wasn't going to let all her progress be swept away by nimble fingers and hot, hot lips…
He hit that spot, that one spot right below her ear, and the intensity of her moan let her know that yes, she did need him right now. She needed him more than she ever thought was possible, and it terrified her. It had been much too long, and now she was here and he was here and it was just too much. Too soon, too hot between them. She pulled her face away from his.
"What's wrong?" The patterns he was drawing on her leg with his fingers and the solidity of his body beneath hers was intoxicating…
"Indy, we can't—I can't."
"Why?" he asked, much more sympathetic than she had expected.
"I…" She couldn't look at him, distracted by his eyes; couldn't look away, distracted by his hands. "I just can't do this. It's been so long, and I…I can't just jump back in to bed with you."
I care about you too damn much, Jones.
He sighed, letting his arms fall to his sides. "Then what are you doing?"
"I don't know." She put her head down on his chest again. "I…"
What else was she supposed to tell him? How she'd felt physically sick for a week after he'd left, after she'd realized that he wasn't coming back? That his leaving had hurt more than her mother's death, and she hated herself and him for that? Or maybe that the hole he'd left had never been filled, never even come close to being filled, until just a few seconds ago.
"I missed you." She lifted her head at that, looked him in the eye. "For a long time, you were the first thing I thought about when I woke up. I couldn't get you out of my head."
"Then why..?"
"The way I left. I couldn't face you after that, and Abner…he would've killed me."
"But why did you leave at all?" She felt herself choking up. She would not cry. Marion Ravenwood was stronger than that.
"You know why. I was so close, and that piece, it was huge. And I didn't realize..." He stopped, looked away. "I didn't realize how much I loved you until I left you behind."
She lowered her head again, trying to hide the tears welling in her eyes, not wanting him to see this weak moment. He couldn't just do this, after all those years of aching and wondering, he couldn't just tell her that he'd loved her.
"You broke my heart," she gritted out, struggling not to let her voice betray her.
"I know." He sighed, sounding drained. "I broke mine, too."
"Damnit Indy!" He didn't get to be heartbroken! It was his fault, not hers! Frustrated, she smashed her fist against his arm, felt him tense and shudder. She'd forgotten how much physical pain he claimed to be in. "Sorry," she murmured.
"No." He pulled her face up to his, whispered in her ear. "I'm sorry." Then he wrapped his arms around her, gently kissed the top of her head. "I'm sorry."
The choking feeling seemed to be going away, a warm one instead spreading through her body, tingling as it reached her fingers and toes. Hesitantly, she turned her head slightly to place her lips against his cheek, on his ear, down his neck. It wasn't too bad. She became aware that he was probably bleeding on her, tried to avoid his wounds and spare him some pain. They'd both had enough of that.
"It is good to see you again." She smiled, sat up, ran her hand through his hair. "Maybe…other things will be good again, too." She smirked down at him, running her fingers lightly across his arms. She felt them move to bring his hands to her waist. Grinning, he looked more gorgeous than she'd ever seen him.
"Only one way to find out."