A/N: My second UlquiXHime Fanfic, after I got my first review ever (YAY ME!) I decided to give it another try.
Why do you want me?
The 4th espada walked into Inoue Orihime's room, or as she called it, her prison. Ulquiorra layed her food tray on the ground and Inoue looked at him with eyes filled with despair. What a pathetic piece of trash, thought Ulquiorra as he looked at the orange haired woman, what possible use could she be to Aizen-sama? Orihime looked up at Ulquiorra, and whispered something that Ulquiorra couldn't believe. "Why does Aizen want me so badly?" Then Ulquiorra slapped her face. Hard. As Inoue cried, Ulquiorra replied, "Never question the will of Aizen-sama." As he left Ulquiorra thought began to wonder that exact same question.
After this meal, Ulquiorra walked to Aizen's throne room, and saw that the ominus overlord of the arrancar wasn't there. Ulquiorra walked out, and ran into no other than Aizen's right hand man, Ichimaru Gin. Gin, keeping his academy award winning fox-like smile, asked Ulquiorra, "Whatcha doin'?" Ulquiorra replied emotionlessly, "Looking for Aizen-sama." As he tried to walk past Gin, Gin cut in front of Ulquiorra again, and asked "Why?" Ulquiorra, who wanted to find Aizen as soon as he could said, "To ask him a question." Gin, ever the persistent one, asked "What?" Ulquiorra, whose patience was running thin, said "Why we keep that weak piece of trash." Gin, who knew Aizen's plans for the woman, smirked. Ulquiorra walked away, headed towards his room.
Meanwhile, Inoue, still crying, asked herself, "Why? Why is it me that's trapped here?" Then, suddenly, Aizen Sosuke barged into her room, and she heard two arrancar, Loly and Menoly, walk by shouting "Aizen-sama! Don't you want us Aizen-sama!" Aizen, who didn't want to know what happened when arrancar and shinigami breed, hushed Orihime when she was about to ask why he was here. Eventually, Loly and Menoly left, and Aizen, who had mysteriously obtained two teacups and a pot of tea in a moment, asked the white-dressed prisoner, "Would you like some tea? I hope you are having a pleasant stay here in Las Noches." Orihime nodded, obviously frightened of Aizen.
Meanwhile, with Ulquiorra, "I told you Yammi! This is my room!" Grimmjow, who seemed seriously pissed at losing to Ichigo, shouted. Yammi yelled back, "It's mine! I called dibs." Ulquiorra sighed as he walked into his room, picked up a book which looked unmistakenly like Grimmjow's diary.
In real world:
Grimmjow: MEN DON'T HAVE DIARIES!! FIX THAT, NOW!!
Me: DON'T KILL ME!!
Back to story:
Ulquiorra picked up a book which looked unmistakenly like Grimmjow's diar-, I mean JOURNAL. (Don't want me to die now, do we?) He started reading the most current entry and immediately regretted it. "YAOI!!" Ulquiorra's scream of disgust and surprise could be heard all throughout Las Noches. Ulquiorra then threw the book out the door and slammed the door shut. Grimmjow picked it up saying, "My artwork isn't that bad now, is it Ulquiorra?" Nnoitora looked at the picture as he was walking by and got a nosebleed, and Grimmjow looked at him as Nnoitora ran away.
Meanwhile, with Szayel and Luppi:
"I love wearing these schoolgirl outfits, don't you Szayel!" said Luppi estatically.
"…Whatever." Syzael said, his outfit was a little too small.
Suddenly, Syzael shot Luppi with a dart, and Luppi fell unconscious. Syzael smirked as he watched Luppi change. Luppi grew breasts that rivaled Rangiku Matsumoto's. Then, Syzael looked up the fainted Luppi's skirt to reveal, "Success!" Syzael shouted as he dragged Luppi to his laboratory.
With Aizen & Orihime:
"Orihime, the espada, Gin, Tosen and I believe that Ulquiorra really needs to get a life, so, would you mind letting Ulquiorra live with you in that suite for a while?" Aizen asked. Orihime said craftily, "Only if you put a t.v., a wii, an x-box 360, and ps3, with games, and Twister in that room." "Deal." Aizen replied. The two shook on it, and Aizen snuck out of the room, while holding a pair of handcuffs, an dart rifle, a group of five plane tickets, and a Burger King Whopper.
A/N: O.K. So, Aizen drinks tea with Orihime, Ulquiorra has prejudice against Yaoi lovers, Grimmjow thinks his art sucks,
Grimmjow throws out his rendition of the Mona Lisa, which looks surprisingly similar to Rukia
… Well, Grimmjow also loses his room, Loly and Menoly are doing God Knows what, Aizen is a perv with a BDSM fetish, Syzael made Luppi into a girl, Nnoitora has a nosebleed, and Ulquiorra apparently needs a life. But why does Aizen has five plane tickets? That's for me to know and you to find out. Please leave a review, or I'll cry. And then I'll tell Grimmjow to hunt you down. Byez!