A/N: Inspired by how sweltering my room was the other day. The purple desk fan saved my life. (ILY, fan.)

Disclaimer: If Naruto were mine . . . let's not joke around here. Because it isn't, and if it was--cue sparkly expression--this would so completely be utter canon.

Hot Day

Neji cracked an eye open to see Tenten's fingers grasping and flailing at him. She looked upside-down. She was upside-down.

"Tenten, what are you doing?"

Sweat dropped off her nose and pattered to the slick, wood floor below her bed. "The fan . . ." she managed, wincing. She seemed in far too much agony to traverse the measly two steps herself and press the button that would inevitably save her.

Neji did not seem to hear her, because his face remained like stone.

"Neji . . ." Tenten gasped in a voice burning with need.

Neji nearly jolted right out of his trousers. It seemed the heat had finally reached him, for his face suddenly saw a hot, red blush. Neji quickly turned up the fan to avoid further discomfiture (and hopefully cool that racing blood of his).

"Thank you, Neji . . ." she murmured, melting chocolate eyes fluttering shut. A supreme smile of bliss graced her sweat-dampened face. Neji abruptly realized that his seat gave him a particularly pleasant view of Tenten's modest cleavage. And subsequently wished to hang himself for coming across such unchaste thoughts of his innocent teammate.

He quietly averted his eyes, like a gentleman.

"Tenten, would you sit properly?" Neji queried in acute annoyance (at himself, at her, for this situation).

Tenten's supreme happiness seemed to dissipate at being called back to earth. Her eyes popped open, and she eyed him from across the rather small bedroom, where he was seated with a knee propped up on the floor. "It's cooler this way," she supplied, not bothering to reverse her strange position. She was perfectly content lying face-up on the rumpled sheets, with her head lolling off the edge of the bed to accept the gratuitous breeze coming from the fan.

"You could lie like this, too, if you want, Neji," she offered. "Want to share?" She patted the spring flower blanket next to her.

"No."

"Okay." A pause. "Turn up the fan if you want to."

He did. Not because he wanted to, but because he knew it was her way of requesting it without actually using the words that would indicate it.

She smiled again, and he found he quite enjoyed it. "Thanks, Neji."

"TENTEN! NEJI! LOOK!" Neither flinched a millimeter as their green-clad comrade burst through Tenten's bedroom door with melting . . . somethings in his hands.

"Lee. What is that?"

"Ice cream!" he announced proudly. "I found it in your refrigerator, Tenten!"

She didn't bother to tell him that they were probably expired. She figured that since they were already liquid messes, Lee wouldn't press.

"Here, Neji!"

Wrong.

Tenten shifted uncomfortably. "Wait, Lee . . . NEJI, DON'T!"

Neji paused, his lips already parted, ice cream at the ready in his right hand.

She felt her tongue run instinctively along her bottom lip. "Don't . . . I don't know how long that's been in there, so don't eat it," she said.

Neji gave Lee a deadpan stare. "Lee."

Lee only blinked, then gave his eternal rival a stunning thumbs-up. "Not to worry, my friends! I shall dispose of this foul confection!" He hurried out of the room, leaving sticky drips of popsicle all along her floor.

"It's not foul . . . it's my favorite brand . . ." she muttered, unaware of speaking it aloud.

"Knowing Lee, he might decide to go out and purchase you new ones," Neji input.

Tenten frowned. "I hope not. It's blistering out there. He'll die." As if it reminded her, Tenten began to air her shirt, hoping to cool the sweat forming beneath it. Neji pretended not to notice.

Minutes passed in the tedium. Tenten spoke up. "Lee, I hope you're not exploring my apartment again! Nothing's changed since the last time, I swear!"

"I'll be there in a second, Tenten!" Lee replied from what Tenten was certain was the kitchen.

She slapped a hand to her forehead. "What could he possibly be doing . . . ?"

Seconds later, Tenten's door opened. Lee bustled in with a beaming grin, holding a metal bowl that she once used to scramble eggs. (It ended in disaster.)

"Lee, what are you doing to my belongings?" she sighed.

"I made ice cream!"

Neji peered into the bowl, then cocked a dampened brow. "Lee, that is not ice cream." He closed his eyes, as if exhausted. "I really don't know what it is."

"Well, you didn't have all the ingredients necessary to make ice cream, Tenten, so I improvised," Lee appealed to her.

"Of course, I don't," she replied. She only had the basics at home. Ice cream was way beyond her. She blinked at the mixture contained in the bowl. "But is that ice and . . . whipped cream?"

Lee laughed gustily, pleased that she had recognized it. "Yes, it is!"

"Ah," Neji offered grimly.

"It's good! I was sampling it as you called me," Lee attempted, holding it out to his two teammates of five years.

Tenten, in a display of sportsmanship, plucked an ice cube from the concoction and smiled shallowly at Lee. "Thanks, Lee."

"No, no, Tenten!" Lee squawked. "You must dip the ice in the whipped cream! It is the only way!"

" . . . I see," Tenten mumbled somberly, compliantly dipping said ice into said whipped cream. Yearning for the feel of the cool ice against the inside of her mouth than anything, she pushed it into her mouth.

Lee smiled brightly. "See?"

Tenten chewed on it for a little while. "Yeah," she responded, "it is pretty good." Her pleasant brown eyes found Neji. "Try some, Neji."

He did not quite sigh. It was more of a deep breath through the nostrils indicating reluctance and acquiescence. Neji, with some humiliating difficulty, grabbed an ice cube and dunked it into the whipped cream in the center. He saw with agitation that his two teammates were watching him. Determined not to show an ounce of difference, he popped it into his mouth.

The cold, fluffy, smooth texture was instant pleasure (though he was determined not to show it, remember?). Neji calmly assessed how many could be divided between them and how he could possibly maximize his own profit of the transaction.

"Hn," he grunted, choking it down quickly and pointedly not relishing the refreshment. Having predicted such a reaction, Tenten and Lee looked away disinterestedly.

"I wish every hot day was like this," Tenten said suddenly.

"How?" Lee asked.

"You know," she smiled, "team bonding, just like Gai-sensei said. It's too bad we couldn't invite Gai-sensei over, too. Who would choose to do a mission on a day like this?"

Lee's face puckered. "Gai-sensei would! His youth is still like that of his genin days! He will not allow a particularly hot day to deter him!"

Having heard the speech before, Neji and Tenten turned away as Lee basked in sensei-student pride.

"'Lee,' he would say, 'do not let a fiery day supersede your own flame of youth!'" Lee exclaimed, standing up.

"Lee, please--" Tenten began, trying to calm him.

"Yes, Gai-sensei! I will do five-hundred push-ups right now to show my dedication! I will not allow myself to wallow on a hot day like our not-quite-so-youthful companions, Gai-sensei!"

Neji took another whipped-cream-coated ice cube. 'Who's he talking to? Gai-sensei isn't even here.' Lee immediately got down, intent on one-handed push-ups. His large, round eyes were fueled by a fierce passion and desire to combat the languidness that pervaded summer days.

Sweat glittered down like a soft, morning drizzle on her polished, wooden floor. "Stop it, Lee!" Tenten cried, aghast.

"Sixty-six, sixty-seven, sixty-eight--"

"I swear, Lee, if you continue to get sweat all over my floor--"

"What did you say about if Gai-sensei were here, Tenten?" Neji inquired coolly, gnawing thoughtfully on another ice cube.

fin.

A/N: Apologies for the odd wording, and the redundant title (my brain died). My writing tends to be . . . erratic when done in the dead of night. I'm actually quite pleased with this whimsical, little number, though. There was no pressure writing it, kind of all impulse. Thank you for reading. Feedback is always appreciated, but not necessary. Go, sunny days. :)