Inspired by Don't Tick Off THE Shark by Jinzouningen

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or I'd have my own character.

Warning: includes spanking of kids don't like read it anyways and pretend there isn't : )

Anro-chan--/\ /\ -hands cookie- thanks for the review -huggles-

Jinzouningen:thanks for the review -huggles- -hands cookie- oh and sorry about getting the name of your story wrong

Cip: Thankies for reading : ) you get a cookie YAY! -hands cookie- -huggles-

LullbyForTheLost: Thanks for the review -hands cookie-

HinaWeasel: Thankies for the review -Hands cookie-

Kisiuke: Thanks and I plan to continue -hands cookie-

StCC: thanks for da review -hands cookie-

(IMPORTANT NOTE!):My stories a line with each other, if you haven't figured that out already, so Naruto's parents are alive and his mom, Kushina, is a princess.(you'll under stand why that's important to know later."

--

"Ow, Same hits hard," thought Itachi walking down the hall rubbing his bottom.

"Who, are you punk," asked a girl scornfully glaring appearing to be about three. She hand silky black hair that went slightly past her shoulders. Her skin was slightly pale, but not enough to tell from a distance. Her eyes were an exact copy of Itachi's and had the same glare as Itachi. Also, she wore a small robe similar to Akatsuki robes only it was just plain black.

"Wha's it to ya," asked Itachi glaring back.

"Do ya know who ya are talkin to, punk?" asked the girl poking him in the chest.

"No and I don't care I'm Itachi Uchiha," said Itachi poking her back.

"Wow, Konan wasn't lying daddy did turn into a kid might as well show him who's boss while he's a kid," thought the girl.

"Well, I is Meeka Uchiha and as long as yous a kid I da boss," said Meeka pushing him.

"No you wisn't, shwimp," said Itachi pushing her into the wall.

"Ow, dat huwt you big meanie," said Meeka hitting Itachi in the stomach. Itachi growled and kicked her in the shin making her wince. They continued to hit and kick each other and soon they were on the floor pulling each other's hair and being more intense with their hits.

"Oh, my gosh! Weave Meeka alone you big meanie," shouted a girl looking about four jumping on Itachi. She had black eyes, short smooth blue hair that went barely to her shoulders, her skin was a close cross between average and pale with a slight hint of blue, and she wore a similar robe to Meeka only hers was ocean blue instead of black.

"Stay out of it girly," shouted Itachi kicking her off him.

"Ow, you jerk," shouted the girl punching Itachi on the shoulder once while he and Meeka kept pulling each other's hair.

"Hey, Hey, break it up," shouted Kisame pulling them away from each other.

"What is wrong with you three?"

"He was huwting Meeka ,Daddy," said the little girl clinging to Kisame.

"Akasuki, let go," said Kisame gently pulling his daughter off him.

"Itachi were you hurting Meeka?" asked Kisame grabbing Itachi's arm.

"She started it," shouted Itachi.

"Meeka, are you trying to take advantage of your father's position?" asked Kisame grabbing her arm.

"So, wha of it!"

"You do realize when we get your father back to normal he'll remember right?" asked Kisame.(He knew because they found part of a scroll that described the jutsu, but the part that told how long it lasts was torn off)

"So I don't care," said Meeka ripping her arm away from Kisame.

"Meeka Asuka Suki Uchiha, do not pull away from me like that," scolded Kisame pulling her back and letting go of Itachi.

"Akasuki, Itachi, go to my room and wait for me," said Kisame sternly.

"Yes sir," they said together leaving.

"Meeka, what is wrong with you ever since your father came back from that mission two weeks ago, you have been disrespectful and avoidant," scolded Kisame kneeling down to her eye level.

"So, wha now let me go!" shout Meeka trying to pull away.

"Meeka, I'm tired of your attitude," scolded Kisame taking her over his knee.

"Let me go now!" shouted Meeka.

"I am your Godfather SWAT and you will SWAT show me SWAT respect and change your attitude SWAT!"

"OW, dat hurt," cried Meeka.

"I want you to change your attitude," said Kisame sternly.

"I don't have a ATTITUDE! SO LEAVE ME ALONE!," shouted Meeka kicking as hard as she could.

"SWAT Change your SWAT attitude SWAT," lectured Kisame making them harder than before.

"OWW!…K-kay…I…get…it…I-I…sowwy…pwease no…more," cried Meeka.

"I'm your Godfather and as long as you're here you will listen to me. And I want you to change your attitude if you don't we will go through this again."

"I-I…s-so-sowwy Kisa… I-I-I-I…twy to…be-behave, I…d-don't…be…bad…on purpose," cried Meeka rubbing her bottom.

"I know, shh," cooed Kisame holding Meeka closely.

"I…sowwy…Kisa," cried Meeka hugging Kisame's neck.

"Shh, Meeka," cooed Kisame.

"…"

"Meeka, you still haven't answered my question. Why have you been acting like this?" asked Kisame after, she calmed down a bit.

"'Cause…Daddy…doesit…care…bout me," sniffled Meeka.

"That's not true Meeka, your father loves you very much he just has a lot of duti-

"I don't care he…used to spend time with me…and tuck me in, bu now…he jus sends me away to Okaa-san…who hates me," sniffled Meeka angrily interrupting.

"I'm sure she doesn't hate y-

"Yes, she does she just calls me dat kid, she doesn't talk to me dat much, she makes me do hers wouk and wun errands, and she doesit even make me dinner she jus drops me off in town with money," said Meeka about to cry again.

"Have you tried talking to your father about it?" asked Kisame cuddling her.

"N-no…'cause he doesit…wisten…an he always…t-too busy," cried Meeka.

"Shh, Meeka, don't cry it'll be okay, as soon as you're father's back to normal you can talk to him," said Kisame holding her close rubbing circles on his back.

"…'m sowwy…I yelled…at…you Kisa," cried Meeka.

"Shh…Meeka I know," comforted Kisame.

--

"Wha you lookin at?"

"Whas it to ya, shimp," spat Itachi glaring at Akasuki.

"Yous a big meanie!"

"I am not yous jus a wussy!"

"Shu up, stupid head," yelled Akasuki sticking out her tongue.

"You ge to involved in things dat don't concewern you," said Itachi scornfully.

"I-I do not stupid!"

"Then, weave me and Meeka's awone if we evers fight again," said Itachi quietly.

"No! I won't let you huwt Meeka, my bestest friend-

"She had it comin so don-

"Stop arguing! Akatsuki go stand in the corner, Itachi come here, now," said Kisame sternly making them both kids jump alittle.

Cautiously Itachi approached Kisame, but he backed up a bit when Kisame reached for him after which Kisame picked him up and took him over his lap.

"Itachi, you know better SWAT then, to go picking fights SWAT especially with your daughter SWAT who is currently a year younger then you SWAT, SWAT do NOT SWAT fight with Meeka or with anyone else until you SWAT get back to you original age! Do you understand," lectured Kisame.

"Y-Yes, S-sir…I-I-I s-so-sowwy," cried Itachi.

"Shh…it's okay…shh," comforted Kisame holding Itachi closely rubbing circles on his back.

"Same…a-are…you…m-mad?"

"No, I'm not mad…"

"I…Sowwy…I-I b-bad," sniffled Itachi snuggling into Kisame's chest.

"You're not bad ,Tachi. What you did was bad," comforted Kisame running his fingers threw Itachi's hair.

"B-But…I-

"You're not bad, Tachi."

"Den…why…do you…s-sp-

"Because, you did something wrong, even good people do bad things it's human nature."

"H-human n-nature…whas dat?" sniffled Itachi.

"It's something almost if not every human is like," explained Kisame.

"Oh…"

"Where's…Dara?"

"I think he's with Konan in the kitchen down the right corridor."

"Kay…can I go pway with him…pwease?"

"Sure, go on," said Kisame setting him on his feet and Itachi left quickly.

"Akasuki-

" 'm sowwy 'm sowwy, I-I, jus didn't wan Meeka huwt, 'm SOWWY! 'M SO SOOOOWWY," cried Akasuki.

"Shh, Akasuki, it's alright, baby," cooed Kisame taking his daughter into his arms sitting down on his bed.

" 'm sowwy 'm sowwy!"

"Shh, calm down, take a deep breath," said Kisame calmly rubbing circles on her back.

"…"

"Better?"

"Uh-huh," sniffled Akatsuki.

"Sweety, I know you like helping people, but I don't want you getting into fights understand?"

"Yes sir," sniffled Akasuki.

"You've been very good this week, so I'll let you off with a warning."

"Thank you, daddy!" shouted Akasuki clinging to her father's chest.

"Go and play you'll be leaving to see your mother soon."

"Bu, I wanna stay with you," burring her face into her father' chest.

"Don't you want to see your mother?"

"No, she got mad at me last time, I want to be with you, you can contwol your temper awound me," said Akasuki snuggling her head deeper into his chest.

"Why do you have to be so cute?"

--

"Hey, Dara, wha you doin?" asked Itahi.

"Konan-chan is makin me a sandwich, un," said Deidara sitting at a small table.

"Wanna, pway after dat?"

"Yeah, sure, un."

"Here you go, DeiDei-chan," said Konan giving Deidara a small PBJ sandwich.

"Oh, hello, Itachi-chan, are you hungry?"

"No, I don't eat much," said Itachi.

"You, don't huh, can you come here for a second?"

"Uh-huh," said Itachi walking over to Konan. Konan picked him up and put him on a counter in the bathroom.

Konan moved Itachi's cloak out of the way and lifted up Itachi's shirt revealing numerous scars, scratches, and many slash marks, also Itachi's body figure was very unhealthy with his rib cage very visible and no muscle on his arms. She was shocked and started examining his back more thoroughly. She must not have noticed how unhealthily thin he was because of his small Akatsuki robe.(Itachi was wearing a miniature Akatsuki robe along with Deidara,

"Itachi, baby, what happened to you were did all these marks come from?" asked Konan concerned checking his legs for injuries.

"Tou-san said it would help my resilience twaining," said Itachi.

"Itachi when was the last time you ate?"

"A week ag-

"A week! What does you're mother think of that?!"

"She's been on a weally wong mission," said Itachi spreading his arms out," so she doesn't know and she doesn't see da scars cause Tou-san has a jutsu so a few times everyday dey isinit visible."

"Hunny, it's not healthy to go that long without eating, you need to ea-

"NO, Otou-san, said I have to suck it up and be perfect!" yelled Itachi as a few tears fell.

"Baby, shh calm down, you'll kill yourself if you don't eat," said Konan grabbing his shoulders and pulling him closer.

"Bu, Tou-san said-

"I don't care what he said I need you to eat something, okay?"

"…Kay."

"Do, you like peanut butter and jelly?"

"Uh-huh."

"Good boy, now why don't you go talk with DeiDei, while I go make you a sandwich."

"Kay," said Itachi going back into the kitchen.

--In Konoha--

Team 7 was waiting impatiently for their sensei. They had been waiting at the training ground for 5 hours ready for their 2 week long mission, and they came an hour late. Kakashi had told them to meet him there to tell them an important mission, they're first B ranked mission, that was actually assigned.

"Where's Kakashi-sensei we've been waiting here for hours! If we're going to do this mission we should have left by now! I could have spent more time training with Pervy Sage!" screamed Naruto.

"Kakashi's always late, what to you expect, dobe," said Sasuke leaning on a tree coolly.

"Yeah, but he does have a point, he should be here by now," said Sakura.

"Yo," said Kakashi popping out of nowhere.

"YOU'RE LATE KAKASHI-SENSEI!" yelled Naruto.

"Sorry, you see this little girl lost her mother in the crowd and-

"You liar!" shouted Naruto and Sakura pointing at Kakashi.

"Okay, now for our mission; we have to go to the river country to guard feudal lord's son, Kiosho. There have been rumors going around of people planning to assassin him."

"But, isn't this kid only like six why would they waste their time killing him?" asked Naruto putting his hands behind his head.

"Ughhhh, Naruto you of all people should know. The offspings of important people are always major targets and an easy way to get to their parents. Why do you think your parents had people follow you around until you gradated the academy?" asked Sakura.

"I thought they were just over protective," said Naruto.

"Tsk, idiot," said Sasuke quietly.

"WHAT YOU SAY?!"

"Hey, hey, come on now we don't have time for fighting hurry up!" said Kakashi dragging Naruto along.

"The river country there have been rumors of the Akatsuki base being there this is my chance Itachi I hope you're ready to die," thought Sasuke smirking as they continued.

--

"Here you go Itachi-kun," said Konan handing Itachi a sandwich as Deidara went to explore the compound some more.

"Thank you, Konan-chan," mumbled Itachi quietly avoiding eye contact.

"Hey, what's wrong?" asked Konan pulling a chair next to him.

"Nuffin," mumbled Itachi slowly eating his sandwich.

"Oh ,come on Tachi-chan, you can tell me," coaxed Konan wrapping her arm around him.

"It's jus…you remind me of…Kaa-san…and I…," said Itachi unable to finish his sentence.

"You miss her ,huh?" asked Konan holding him closely.

"Uh-huh, are you mad?"

"Why would I be mad, sweety?" asked Konan.

"Tou-san said dat children should be seen and not heard and dat emoshins are weaknesses," said Itachi.

"Aww, poor baby," said Konan hugging Itachi closely.

"I better tell Kisame about your abu-

"No! Don't tell Same pwease!"

"Why, hunny-

"Jus, cause pwease don't tell," begged Itachi with tear filled eyes.

"Oh, alright, but I want you too if I don't," said Konan.

"But I can't…"

"Why n-

"Jus cause," said Itachi resuming to eat his sandwich.

"Fine," said Konan sighing.

"Anck you," said Itachi while he was chewing.

"Don't talk while you're eating," scolded Konan lightly.

"Sowy," said Itachi after swallowing hard.

"That's okay, sweety," said Konan ruffling Itachi's hair making Itachi smile.

"I'm going to go insane keeping this secret," thought Konan.

"Can I go play with Dara now pwease," begged Itachi.

"Yeah, go ahead."

"Thank you," said Itachi hugging Konan's leg before he left looking for Deidara and sooon found him down the southwest hallway.

"Hey, Dara wha-

Itachi was cut off by Deidara coving his mouth and shushing him," Queit."

"Why," whispered Itachi.

"I pwacticin shadowing people so I've been fallowing spiky mad wound, un," said Deidara.

"Can I pwactice with you?" asked Itachi quietly.

"Sure, come on he's giving Crazy Plant Man a mission, un ," said Deidara leaning his head in slightly with Itachi.

"Alright Zetsu just go take this ransom to the land of water for their princess," said Pein looking over to the young princess struggling in her bounds.

"This mission seems more appropriate for Kakuzu, don't you think white," said the black half of Zetsu leaving.

"Yeah, he'd kill for a mission like this."

"That guy has issues," said Itachi.

"Seriously, un."

"Wha you two idiots doin spyin on my daddy?" asked Osutin only to be tackled and shushed by Itachi and Deidara.

"Shh, we seein how wong we can spy on him out him noticing, un ," said Deidara quietly.

"You two are idiots I'm gonna tell my daddy," said Osutin.

"I guess if you don't think you could fallow your father wound without bein noticed, cause yous too weak," said Itachi smirking.

" 'm not weak and to pwove it I'll help you losers shadow my father," said Osutin.

--1 hour later--

"Konan why are they've been following me all day, it's getting annoying pretending I don't see them," whispered Pein.

"I know just a little while longer and they'll get bored."

"That's it I've wasted enough time with you losers I'm leaving," said Osutin.

"Hi, Otou-san," said Osutin smiling and gripping his father's leg tightly.

"Umm, yeah, hello," said Pein patting his son's head nervously.

"Wha you doin?"

"Nothing of interest why, do you ask?"

"Jus wonderin."

"Dara I'm with Osutin dis is boin," said Itachi leaving.

"Wait up Tachi!" yelled Deidara after a moment.

--6 hours late--

"I still don't get why I need a bath," grumbled Itachi being carried into the bathroom.

"Because you and Deidara thought it was a good idea to play in the mud and raid Konan's make-up," said Kisame running the bathwater while Itachi sat on the conter next to the sink in front of a mirror.

"Bu-

"No buts, Itachi you're filthy and look like a girl who put her make-up on in the dark."

"I think 'm a pretty girl," said Itachi sarcastically.

"Oh, kami," said Kisame.

"Kaa-san says is bad to say dat," said Itachi.

"For children, now just take your cloths off."

"Kay," said Itachi removing his shirt and then the rest of his clothing,but then he looked back in the mirror and saw his scars were becoming visible slowly. Itachi's heart skipped a beat thinking fast he pulled his shirt in front of him.

"Come on Itachi your bath's ready," said Kisame reaching for Itachi, but he scooted back quickly shaking his head.

"Come on Itachi," said Kisame warningly.

"No, I-I-I you can't, uh…It's a jus…you can't…see…want Konan," said Itachi nervously.

"I'd be happy too, but Konan's busy cleaning up her make-up, now come on-

"Noooo," whined Itachi.

"Yes, now," said Kisame, but then he looked into the mirror and saw Itachi back with many slash marks and bruises.

"Itachi what happened to you?" asked Kisame looking over him quickly.

"Nuffin," said Itachi pulling away.

"Don't give me that, who did this to you?"

"No one," said Itachi.

"Itachi…"

"It was Tou-san."

"His father, but I thought Itachi was suppose to be their golden boy," thought Kisame.

"Why?"

"Twainin."

"Hold still Itachi I'm going to put some lotion on you," said Kisame grabbing some from the shelf.

"NO! Part of tou-san's jutus makes it so it can't get lotion on it or it'll hurt more," sputtered Itachi.

"Alright then, come on let's et you a bath," said Kisame picking him up and placing him into the tub.

Itachi was whimpering the moment he touched the water because the water burned his scars," What's wrong Tachi?"

"Huwt scars," said Itachi hissing in pain.

"Well, you really need a bath can you handle it?"

"Uh-huh," sniffled Itachi.

"Alright," said Kisame rubbing shampoo in Itachi's hair.

" 'm…mmm," mumbled Itachi.

"What Itachi I can't hear you speak up."

" 'm sowy Same," said Itachi.

"You mad?"

"No, I'm not mad, you're still just a kid, and you didn't mean anything by it," said Kisame rubbing body gel on Itachi.

"Why you nice, Tou-san said ninjas are heartless," said Itachi.

"Not all ninjas are Tachi."

"Oh, kay I gets it."

"…"

"Same, I heard Religious man say some weird word to day and I don't know what it means."

"What did he say?" asked Kisame forgetting it was Hidan who said it.

"He said Kakuzu was a f--ing ba-- and should burn in he-

"Okay, that's enough, out of you, I don't want to hear you say those words again," said Kisame sternly.

"Bu wha do the words mean?" asked Itachi crossing is arms stubbornly.

"They are very bad adult words, and children who use them get into deep trouble, that's all you need to know," said Kisame lifting him out of the tub.

"HPMP, stupid shark," mumbled Itachi, but Kisame picked up on it and tuned him to the side giving him a sharp slap on the but.

"OWWIE!" cried Itachi.

"It's not nice to make comments like that do you understand?"

"…"

"Itachi…," said Kisame warningly.

"Yessir," said Itachi crossing his arms angrily.

"Come here Itachi," said Kisame kneeling down with an over sized t-shirt in his hand.

"Kay," said Itachi coming over so Kisame could put on his pjs.

"Okay, Itach-kun time for bed-

"Nooo," whined Itachi backing up slowly.

"Come on Itachi, little boys should be in bed right now."

" 'm not WITTLE yous jus a gaint!" shouted Itachi running out of the room quickly.

"Itachi Uchiha!" yelled Kisame chasing after Itachi and soon catching him.

"Let go, now," demanded Itachi.

"Itachi if you don't calm down you'll find yourself over my knee," said Kisame holding Itachi closer.

"Fine."