"Do-doo, do-do-di-doo..."

I floated along the hallways aimlessly, still not quite sure what to do next. The demon, or ghost, or whateverhe was had cheated and sent me directly into a no-win situation, so I was as good as toast. Still, I had around 6 hours or so to kill. My last 6 hours in existence... and I had absolutely no idea what to do with them.

At first I had considered just giving up; sitting on the floor and sobbing like a lost child until my time was up. I decided instead that if, as I had been told, I had been just drifting through life, I should at least do something different with my death. Thus, I found myself wandering around with no real plan beyond doing something exciting.

Thus far, the trip had been less than memorable.

I had somehow managed to get myself lost in the dungeons, where I could see all sorts of nasty torture devices no matter which way I looked. As if being dead wasn't disturbing enough...

Soon, I began to notice a new pull on my spirit. Curious, I followed it. Cautiously, of course; this was still Nosgoth, after all. It didn't take long for the smell to hit; a foul stench that got stronger the closer I came to the source of the tug. When I finally reached the place where the pull (and the stink) was strongest, I realized I had been tracking a corpse. A very decayedcorpse. The sight of its hand poking out through the dirt gave me not only an acute case of nausea, but also an idea.

"It worked for Raziel.." I shrugged my non-shoulders and decided to give it a shot.

Raz may have had an easy time of it, but the process of willing oneself back into reality is much more difficult for the average person. First, I had to figure out how to get my spirit into the corpse. In the end, I had to actually lay down on the very spot and picture myself melting through the dirt and into the body itself.

That done, I had to dig myself out before I suffocated and had to start over. This one could have been much worse... at least it was a shallow grave.

Then came the worst part of the whole process; taking the decayed carcass that I was wearing and making it look like me. It took me close to a quarter hour of intense concentration to finally change things around, and then another ten minutes to clean off the rotting skin.

Still, all in all, it was a valuable experience. It not only gave me another chance, it also showed me what I could do if I really tried. I didn't have time to enjoy the sense of accomplishment, though. I was still lost in the Saraphan Stronghold.

I set off wandering again, this time physically there and thus far more vulnerable. Every time I even thoughtI heard something, I dove into the nearest hiding place. Go ahead, laugh. It may seem funny to you to see someone jump headfirst into a closet because of a squirrel, bit I would rather look like an idiot than a grease spot.

While waiting for a pair of guards to pass me by, I thought about the events which had led to my recent demise. Why did that guy call me a demon? I don't look like a demon, do I? I didn't last time I checked... I remember looking in the mirror last night to put on that silly mud... Oh.

Of course. The mud-mask, blue hair, and lip ring didn't look very human by Nosgothian standards. If I could just wash up, change, and do something about my hair, I could maybe make it through this a bit easier. Maybe without getting squished again.

Once I was free to move again, I ducked into the next room. There, I found enough to pull of a basic disguise, if barely. With a little imagination, a cloak became a skirt, my pajama bottoms became a kerchief for my hair, and a puddle of water became a sink. After all that, and removing my piercings, I felt ready to brave Nosgoth once more.

Of course, now that I was prepared, I didn't run into anyone at all. It was like they had all just disappeared at once! I was a little disappointed I couldn't try out my new disguise, but the biggest part of me was glad I didn't have to worry about it not working.

I wandered around until I found myself in a place that looked vaguely familiar. I hadn't been in this part of the stronghold myself, so I must have seen it in one of the games. Which one, though?

"How do I get out from here?" I mused aloud. And, wouldn't you know it, the minute I opened my mouth I ran into a very tall blond woman who looked no friendlier than my first acquaintance had been.

She promptly opened her mouth wide and began screaming, "Intruder! Get her!" at the top of her lungs. I took this as my cue to run.

"Please don't be a sorceress! Please don't be a sorceress! Pleasedon't- Uhn!!" I fell to floor, my chant and my escape interrupted by a half-dozen balls of light slamming me in the back and side. "Great!" I spat, climbing back to my feet as fast as I could. "Perfect! A friggin' sorceress." I ran full out, hoping I could find some way to lose her and the three friends she had picked up on the way.

Just ahead, I saw daylight streaming out of an open door. Thank God! There are more hiding places outside and a distinct lack of dead-end rooms outside!

My relief was short lived.

I skidded to a stop just before I would have plunged head first over the edge of a balcony. Far, far below, I saw a lake glinting in the sunlight. I'd rather not... I turned around, hoping to find another path, but the sorceress and her posse were right on my tail and closing in. I looked from them to the lake and back again, but made my choice when I saw the blond start to gesture wildly.

I swallowed hard and leapt over the edge, screaming all the way.

"Tawandaaaa!!"

I love Fried Green Tomatoes, don't you? Anyway, I've reached a couple of decisions. 1, there will be six more chapters of this insanity. Five of the whiny lady's adventures in Nosgoth, and one for the epilogue. 2, unless I start getting reviews, I'm not going to post them. I'll send them to Dragonaia, but until I get three reviews for this chapter, the rest will just be for my own amusement. That's the main reason I write anyway; the only reason I put things on this site is to get some tips on how to develop my writing style. If I'm not getting it, I don't see any reason to waste my time typing all this out and uploading it. I don't mean to sound grouchy, but I really don't have enough time on the computer to go to all that trouble if I don't get anything back.