Disclaimer: ST: VOY is not mine.

Slapping Sense

By mistress amethyst une

She threw down her rose bouquet and took off the ring he had just slipped on her finger before slapping him in the face with a resounding thwack. The entire congregation gasped.

"What the hell?" yelped Chakotay.

"I am terminating this relationship."

"On what grounds?"

"You do not love me."

"Why would I be marrying you if I didn't love you?"

She slapped him again, "Your response has just verified your guilt."

His mouth fell open, "How?"

"If you did love me, the logical response to my accusation would be 'Of course, I do.'"

She then turned to Kathryn who had looked utterly miserable while performing the ceremony. Without warning, she slapped her too. The older woman was sent reeling by the force of the hit but Chakotay instinctively caught her.

"I apologize for my insubordination," she stated as if she had just gone over her allotted holodeck time and not imparted bodily harm on the two highest ranking officers on board as the entire crew looked on, "But he loves you and I tire of being a substitute."

She then walked out leaving Kathryn in Chakotay's arms as they nursed nearly identical cases of whiplash and exchanged confused glances.