Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. If I did, nobody would read it.

Vertically challenged

Rukia was furious. That damn Ichigo! To insult her like that. How dare he to call her something like that? She sat on the high tree standing in front of Karakura highschool, currently thinking about how to get back at Ichigo for this.

So what did Ichigo say exactly? Well, a few hours before Rukia and Ichigo had a fight. Nothing new you might think, but this time Ichigo had crossed a line. A very important line to Rukia, because it was concerning her height. You might think that Rukia was a tough girl and couldn't be insulted by something ridiculous like her HEIGHT. But truth to be told it was her sore point. When it came to this topic, she was beyond self-conscious. She was ashamed. So she had a short temper concerning centimeters.

And Ichigo had done exactly this damn thing: He had insulted her height. He had called her – she was about to explode when she recalled this sentence – vertically challenged. Yes, vertically challenged!! He wasn't exactly a giant himself!

At this thought it hit her! What if he wasn't that self-confident he would like everybody to think he was? She was going to pay him back. With this, Rukia jumped from the branch she was sitting on and made her way to the Kurosaki clinic.

She found Ichigo in his room, currently making his homework. When she walked up to him, he lifted his head and looked at her. "What's up? Done with sulking?"

"I wasn't sulking! I just didn't feel like going back! So I watched the sunset from the tree."

"Didn't feel like going back my ass! You were pouting!"

"I wasn't!" She crossed her arms in front of her chest. "By the way, I thought about your nice comment. Is it possible you called me something like that because you've got a problem with the fact that every single guy your age or older is taller than you?"

It was interesting to watch Ichigo's face chancing it's colour faster than every chameleon ever could. When it reached a dark purple colour, he blared out a loud "WHAT THE HELL?" and jumped up from his chair.

Rukia snickered. "Seems like I was right. You ARE self-conscious about your height!" With that she walked to the door.

"I AM NOT SMALL!" Ichigo shouted behind her.

She turned around and glanced at his face. The colour wasn't dark purple anymore but bright red, making a weird contrast to his hair. "Well, every male I know is taller than you. Nii-sama, Ukitake-taichou, Kyoraku-taichou… shall I continue?"

"Look at yourself! There's not a single woman older than 14 on this planet or even in soul society who is as small as you! Oh wait, Yachiru is smaller than you! How could I forget something important like this?"

"Don't you dare comparing me to a little child!!"

"Well, she is older than 14, many years infact! And she is a fukutaichou! If you can compare MY height to the taichous, I can compare yours to a fukutaichou!"

"You damn… your own father towers above you!"

"What the hell, this is ridiculous! You seem to forget that I'm still growing! Once I'll be as tall as my father!"

"Yes, but you will never reach Chad, Renji, Zaraki-taichou, Komamura-taichou, Oomaeda-fukutaichou…"

"Shut the hell up! You have to talk! By the way, Komamura doesn't count, he isn't even human!" He scratched his head. "Hey wait, Ishida and Toshiro are smaller than me!"

"Yes, but their brain makes up for it! Something you hardly can claim for yourself!"

… "RUKIA!"

A/N: another oneshot. It hit me when I was reading a fanfic where Ichigo was insulting Rukia's height. So I checked the height of the bleach characters and there are just a few who are smaller than Ichigo. I know, I know! They are OOC, but it just came out like this. Gomen. Review? Be kind please, I don't know if I can stand flames.

Ja ne!