I don't own anything as usual. This is my personal response to the MAST amounts of those Female-Allen fan-fics out there. This one kind of break the weird fanfic moods I've been having, so its all good. Just pure humor, enjoy.

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As Rumors Have It

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A knock sounded at the door. A muffled come in was said from behind the pair of wooden doors. He tucked the strands of white behind his ear, preventing it from blocking his vision again. He gave a light sigh and pushed open the door.

He really didn't know what was so important that Komui had to call him down to the science department at 11:30 at night.

"Hey Allen." He was greeted by Rinali who stood by her brother's desk with a nervous look on her face.

"Hey…" He took a step in and saw a lot of familiar faces from the Order crammed into Komui's office.

Rabi, Krory, Miranda, Bookman, Jerry, Riba, various members of the science department and even Kanda was there to join the crowd.

"What is happening everyone?" He asked nervously as Riba closed the door behind him.

"We just want to ask you something." Riba gave him a very kind smile.

He suddenly felt very trap even as the older of the Li siblings started to speak.

"Allen, I, I mean we are just curious as to what you have to say about some of the… umm…"

"Rumors?" Rabi suggested as Komui became at a loss of words.

"Yes, rumors. We were just curious whether these rumors were really true… that's all." He concluded.

"Rumors…? What rumors?" He raised an eyebrow at the lot of them.

Allen looked at all the people in the room, lost at what they were trying to get at.

"…I don't think I get what you are trying to say…" Allen slowly responded.

"Trying to play dumb?" Rabi took a guess at the 'strange' behavior that Allen had.

"What? No, it's not like that Rabi. I really don't get what rumors you guys are talking about." Allen insisted.

"Even I heard it Moyashi." Kanda spoke up with an amused smirk on his face. "Don't tell me you didn't."

Allen glared at him for the nickname before starting again. "I really don't know what rumors you guys are talking about."

"Allen, you can tell us about it you know, I wouldn't mind at all." Jerry piped up from Komui's desk.

"Jerry!" Allen blushed, not exactly knowing his intentions. But then his features straighten again. "I don't know what you are talking about!"

"Allen, you know you can tell us." Miranda quietly said from the corner.

"None of us would say anything if you didn't want us to." Krory spoke up, standing by the timid woman.

"I. Really. Don't. Know. What. Rumors. You. Are. Talking. About." Allen felt that he was left in the dark for too long, he had no clue at what they were saying. And he somehow felt that these 'rumors' were going to affect him greatly.

"You really can't be serious right?" Rabi looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"I am serious." Allen had to resist the urge to roll his eyes at them all.

"Alright then… Pand— I mean Bookman, please read us out the so call rumors." Rabi continued as he laughed nervously.

Bookman sent his apprentice a glare before opening a notebook. "As the white haired exorcist unwrapped the bandages on his chest, it was slowly revealed that he was in fact a GIRL."

Allen froze; he literally didn't know what he could say about this. He didn't even think that his mind really registered what these rumors were.

"What did… you just… say…?" He blinked once than twice before answering.

"Allen Walker is female." Kanda shortly explained.

"…"

And then Allen literally exploded at the news. "WHAT??"

"Allen! Calm down!" Rinali winced at the volume of his voice. He then took a deep and shaky breath.

"I am very calm." His voice was certainly very calm, rather scary in fact. Rabi couldn't help but move back. And everyone couldn't help but notice that the temperature of the room suddenly dropped by several degrees.

"I, Allen Walker, am not a female. I am a man with all the right organs. Do you want to see? Because I am as sure as hell that I am male." With this he gripped the base of his shirt and pulled it over his head, showing off an indeed flat chest.

"Need to see the other thing? I would gladly show you all if I can prove that I am in fact a male." After he said that, protests sounded out in the room, especially from Komui as he said something about protecting his beloved sister's innocence.

"Good." Allen calmed down slightly, after he proved his manliness.

"And by the way, I never wear bandages around my chest; shouldn't Kanda be the one with these rumors?" Allen asked with a raised eyebrow. A wave of murmurs started in the room. A few nods of heads too.

"Yuu-chan! Can I see you without your bandages?" Rabi walked over to the twitching exorcist. "Now that Allen say it, it is rather possible that you are in fact a female underneath that."

"Moyashi… do you want to die?" Kanda asked as he glared at the white haired boy who just questioned his manhood. He then was distracted by a red head that was a little too close. "Get your hands off of me Rabi!"

"No, not really." Allen couldn't help but snicker as he sees Kanda trying to fend off the offending hands of the Bookman apprentice. He then turned to the rest of the people in the group who were thoroughly amused at the scene before them.

"Sorry, Allen." Rinali blushed slightly at the mistake they all made. Miranda joined in with a light sorry.

"Its fine, I am just glad that it is all straightened out now." Allen gave a small laugh.

"Oh yeah, by the way, where did you hear these rumors from?" Allen asked out of curiosity.

They answered as if it was obvious.

"Fangirls of course."

XXX Kuro

So how was it? –snickers- Can't blame me though. I just hope no one takes any offense to it! Cuz I don't mean it, this is just for fun, humor! Review?