Fandom: Naruto
Pairing: None yet
Warnings: Mild-violence. Abstration. Mentions of psychiatric wards and mental disorders.
Disclaimer: Naruto © Masashi Kishimoto.

On the ground I lay
Motionless in pain
I can see my life flashing before my eyes
Did I fall asleep?
Is this all a dream?
Wake me up, I'm living a nightmare
— Three Days Grace

Revelation #1: Ninjas Don't Exist
And we don't go on secret missions and the like

"This is an S-ranked mission. You three understand that, right, Naruto?"

Neji glanced sideways at the blonde, a smug expression in place. Shino continued to look straight ahead. Or maybe he was asleep. Naruto was never sure of what was really going on behind those sunglasses.

"Hai, hai, Tsunade-baa-chan. I'll be careful, don't worry."

Tsunade muttered something under her breath before saying, "I want the three of you to be careful. I need not stress how important this mission is to Konoha, and how dangerous it will be, because you're all going to find that out sooner or later whether you want to or not. I chose you three for specific reasons, none of which I shall tell you, Naruto, stop fidgeting now. The information I am about to tell you will not leave this room. Got it?"

"So where's everyone going now? Neji?"

"Training," was Neji's short reply.

Naruto stared at him.

"Dude, you are boring as hell. Ne, Shino, where are you off to?" Naruto asked, noticing that his friend had started walking off.

"I'm having dinner with Kiba and Hinata," Shino said.

"Hey! Can I come too?"

"I would have thought that you would want to spend the evening with Sakura."

"Nah," Naruto said. "She's been busy with hospital stuff lately, so she's probably tired now. I'll see her after our mission."

Neji coughed.

"Naruto… You do know that we might not come back from this mission, don't you?"

"What are we supposed to do again?"

Neji sighed for the umpteenth time.

"I told you just now; there's been an Akatsuki sighting in Amegakure."

Naruto blinked.

"So?"

"There's a Jinchuuriki in Amegakure. And this one isn't a ninja," Shino cut in before Neji could respond.

"So we protect the Jinchuuriki and kick some Akatsuki butt?" Naruto asked, grinning.

"Naruto," Neji said.

"Yeah?"

"Don't ever use that phrase in my presence again."

"… Okay."

"Well… we're here?"

The trio looked around what was probably supposed to be a marketplace, only to find it deserted.

Suddenly, from nowhere, they attacked.

"Ah! Tsunade-sama! He's come around!"

Suddenly, Naruto found himself being shaken awake.

"Naruto? Naruto? Can you hear me? Wake up. Naruto"

Naruto groggily opened his eyes, expecting to find himself in a Konoha hospital, or even in an abandoned shack nearby. Instead, all he saw was… white.

"Get the jacket ready!" he heard Tsunade bark.

Before he could completely register his surroundings, he found himself being forced into a white straight-jacket by three other people.

"Naruto," Tsunade repeated, bending down so she was eye-level with him.

"Baa-chan?" Naruto called out groggily, his throat parched.

Tsunade held out four fingers to Naruto and asked him, "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Four. Ne, baa-chan, why am I in this?" Naruto asked. "And where am I? This doesn't look like Konoha."

Behind Tsunade, the men began whispering to each other.

"You don't remember?"

"I… remember being sent on a mission with Neji and Shino, and we were near Amegakure when a bunch of missing-nin ambushed us," Naruto recalled. "What happened to them?"

"Neji and Shino are here. They're safe," Tsunade said.

Naruto stared at her.

"Ne, baa-chan," he said. "I'm perfectly fine, I swear. You can let me go now."

When Tsunade made no move to take off the jacket, he checked his right thigh, which donned a grey tracksuit bottom and then scanned the room. His bedside table was empty, save for a glass of water.

"Where are my weapons?" he asked.

"Naruto—" Tsunade began.

"What is this? Is this a genjutsu?" Naruto demanded.

"Not this farce again," one of the men at the back muttered to his friend next to him.

"This isn't a genjutsu," Tsunade said.

"Then what are you doing here?" Naruto asked. "Were you captured by enemy shinobi as well?"

Two of the men snorted.

"Naruto," Tsunade began slowly, "there isn't such thing as shinobi."

Naruto blinked.

"Wait, what?" he asked, puzzled. "How can you say that? We're both shinobi. We come from a village, Konoha. Did you get knocked on the head or something, baa-chan?"

Tsunade sighed.

"No, we're not shinobi, Naruto. We don't come from a village and we don't go around on secret missions and such," she explained tiredly.

"You're kidding right—?"

"No, I'm not," Tsunade interrupted. "You're not a ninja, Naruto."

"Yes I am!" Naruto protested.

"Ninjas don't exist," one of the men spat from the back.

Naruto narrowed his eyes.

"Baa-chan," he said. "Tell that bastard he's wrong."

Tsunade sighed again.

"Naruto—"

"Tell him!" Naruto shouted. "Or better yet, tell me how I got here, why I'm in a straight-jacket and just where the hell I am!"

Tsunade hesitated, looking at him with something akin to pity and explained, "You came here when you were five."

"Where?" Naruto shouted.

"To the Konoha Psychiatric Hospital. You've been here for the past eleven years."

A/N:

Because I reeeeeeeeally need another project to work on. Ugh, someone shoot me now.

All chapters on this will be very short, because it would be so much easier and because I suck. On the upside, that means updates will come faster :D

SHINO. AND SPEAKING LINES. OH, THAT WAS THE BEST PART.

Don't be surprised if the title changes everytime you see the link. It's just me.