Social Suicide!

Summary: Ryan meets the new girls, Cloe and Rachael, and discovers a strange secret about his family's past. When he finds out Rachael is his cousin and they are the heirs to the throne of Magicath, they decide whether or not to tell Sharpay. Clyan and Zacachael

Disclaimer: I do not own High School Musical or anything in relation to it.

FYI: 10/21/11: It has come to my attention that enough of the people reading this have assumed that, simply because I have characters with names unrecognizable from the main cast in the entirety of the High School Musical series, I have given myself a self-insert in one of them. And that has caused more than enough people to turn away thinking the story is written by another crazy fangirl who has sought a way to pair herself up with one of the main cast. I promise you that was never my intention, so allow me to correct you on that. I only meant for it to appear that way and I suppose I succeeded, huh?

The characters of Cloe and Rachael are based on a pair of interesting background characters I spotted during scenes such as the Status Quo and audition scenes among various others in the first movie. I simply gave them personalities and one of those personalities happens to belong to my friend, Squeaky. I just provided names and background stories that I saw fit. The character of Theresa is actually an OC I created to fill a certain role that shall be discovered at a later point in the story. And upon request, I based her off another of my friends. Anyone with a personality resembling someone I know has only been upon that person's request, so don't blame me if you don't like it. I can only try my best to properly portray them here while remaining within the guidelines of a parody.

Alrighty, as for a quick explanation of which background characters I used before I continue my spiel: Cloe is the green-shirted hat-wearing girl sitting behind Alan and next to the shy auditioner in the audition scene (27:11). Rachael is the green-shirted girl dancing by the stairs as Sharpay and Ryan walk down them (right before Gabriella dumps her lunch on her) during Status Quo (43:09).

Happy now that I've explained that and given you the exact moment I snapped the screenshot (on the DVD) so you can find these characters too? Of course, I could only find the Rachael character once throughout the whole movie… =( But I'm sure she's elsewhere too. *nods* I most probably haven't noticed.

She just doesn't stick out as much as the Cloe character does: I think the pink-shirted one in the background up top where Ryan and Sharpay are in Status Quo (she's sort of near the stairs at one point in 41:40) is also the same character (though I could be wrong, since she isn't wearing a hat), she's definitely the yellow-shirted one in the callbacks scene (walking down the auditorium aisle in 1:19:32), and she also appears in the random auditorium segue scene (behind Troy in 52:03) leading into the part where Troy misses basketball practice.

I also realize that there were a lot of inconsistencies between my story and the first High School Musical movie, plenty Crowning Moments of (Spelling) Fail, poor choice of words, horrid grammar, and other such offenses to the written language. Heheh… Well, I'll tell you a secret. That was all intentional.

*gasp* 8O *= shocked face*

Yeah… I got you good, huh? XD

As was stated in the first paragraph of this FYI, plenty of you have come across fanfictions that were so disgustingly hormonal and nonsensically sappy that you've wanted to bash the author's brains out or at least turn away from their work for good, correct? Well… This is a parody of that. Yeah, that means EVERY itty bitty detail in this fic, including author's notes and disclaimers all the way down to content, grammar, and writing style, was a complete and intentional parody. I figured I may as well tell you after approximately four years before I have even more accidental readers trying to take this story seriously. No, I'm not lying to save my arse… Trust me.

I kinda wanted to see how many people would read it and tell me it was great even though I knew it sucked. Surprisingly… no one really mentioned how horrid it was aside from one reviewer who actually began to point out the bit mentioned in the first paragraph. Heheh… I bow to accommodate that person's adequate observation skills as well as their outstanding courage. *bows deeply* Though I have a feeling there were other reviewers/readers who started to see the plot holes and realize how dumb the story was. Heheh… XD Yet again, surprisingly, none of them thought to point out how terribly written the piece was. Ah, well… I guess I proved my point about these types of fanfictions and subsequently those who read/enjoy them. That's why I decided to finally tell you. It was more of a test I felt like issuing really. XD As well as a supreme logic fail on my part (it would've been nice to tell you all sooner, huh?). =P But yeah… Enough jabbing at my Fridge Logic.

If you're interested in reading the revamped version (yes, with better grammar and such for your piece of mind) rather than this horrid one (the true parody), please go to my profile page and look for "Social Suicide: Revival" at the bottom of the page amongst my other stories. Thank you. If you choose not to read it… I'll understand, though I do wish you'd give this story another slightly more serious try. I almost headdesked my brains out while going through it again, since I basically had to rewrite reality here (I had to rewrite this story backwards according to the movie "timeline", which makes less sense than the movie itself).

Though, I'll tell you one thing about the revamping… It'll be a lot funnier if you stick it out and read this version first. Trust me. It'll be worth it so long as you take a step back and drop the critical eye while reading this horridly accurate parody of all teen fanfictions that are written on the premise of premature out-of-whack hormones. You'll get your piece of mind after you stick this one out. But you don't have to. It's just a suggestion. =P

So, with that said, I think that would technically make the revamped version a parody of a parody… O_o Erm… maybe. But awesomer! Heheh… Yeah. Though, it would help to think of it as # 1½ in the parody "series". This scarily accurate version is just # 1 in the "series". You'll see how that logic makes sense later on when and if you decide to read "Social Suicide: Revival". =P

It's about time I stick an Official Disclaimer in here, so here it is:

Warning:This is a parody – it's meant to be laughed at – so please treat it as such. I do not expect anyone to take this seriously. Don't read it expecting to follow a serious story – that simply won't happen. This may include the use of stereotypical sappy lines, the overuse of incredibly lame dialogue and jokes that aren't funny, horrid grammar, massive spelling fails, poor quality sentence structure, filler chapters too short to deserve existence, the presence of one or more Mary Sues, incorrect characterization, sickeningly sweet romantic scenes, the pointlessly dramatic screaming of the word no at the end of multiple chapters, unnecessarily repetitive and unwanted pda, whiney author's notes and disclaimers begging for reviews that aren't deserved, and other such stereotypes… Be wary as you read. One or more of the above may induce pukage. You have been warned. This is a parody.

Prologue:

A woman, in her 20's, sits at a writing desk in the darkness using only the light of one small candle. She is holding a quill in her hand and continues writing her last in a long line of letters.

"Well, my dear." she wrote, "I must bid you adieu. Do not worry; this is my last day in Arabia so I will see you soon. If by any chance we should be separated, my dear sister, we shall meet again someday. We might not meet in the next week or in the next year, but sooner or later we shall come together to save our home and our father. Use your powers well, my lovely Delilah, and take care of the genie in the lamp. I must go now, stay safe. Your worried sister, Princess Corinne."

At that, the woman got up and put the letter, addressed to her sister, inside her pocket then ran out of the room and out into the dark streets. While she ran, she thought to herself, "What have we gotten ourselves into?"

Chapter 1: New School

17 years later…

The grounds of East High were quiet and still. Classes were still in session and everyone was used to the schedule by now. Well, all but one girl.

Cloe was new at East High and had no idea where to go. She was sitting in English daydreaming. She was a freshman who joined the school halfway through the second semester.

It was her first day and everyone else had come back from winter break a while ago. She was daydreaming about the snow she missed so much. She had moved away from her old home, her old school, and her old friends. So far, she couldn't wait for school to end.

"Cloe!" the teacher called, releasing her from her thoughts. Miss. Darbis was very caught up in the theatre and took everything seriously. "Yes, Miss. Darbis." Cloe responded trying to sound confident. "Ah." She began, "I see you are new here, but the rules remain clear. You are to pay attention in class. We take the rules very seriously here at East High. No exceptions! Do you understand?"

She glared making adrenaline pump throughout Cloe's body. "Yes, Miss. Darbis." she breathed softly. Her face flushed a little, which was a very noticeable contrast to her normally pale skin. She had light brown hair that went just below shoulder length and she was no more than 5 foot 4. Here pale skin went see through whenever she was excited, nervous, or cold. And, right now, she was very nervous.

It happened a lot, especially at her old school. Cloe was average height and weight. Even though sometimes she felt a bit bigger or smaller depending on who she was around. Right now she was feeling very tiny. She looked down and noticed her veins were showing. She quickly tucked her arms and legs under her desk, as all the other students were staring.

"And I expect the rest of you to follow the rules as well." Miss. Darbis continued. The bell rang and Cloe was the first one out of the room. As she walked down the hallway, more and more students poured out of their classrooms.

'Great' Cloe thought, 'My first day and I'm a shoe in for a detention with Miss. Darbis.' It felt horrible to be the new girl in school. She was only 14, being the fact that her birthday had just passed, and most of the freshman class was already 15. She had heard about the school musical. There were many times she had wanted to sign up, but was too afraid of more humiliation. There was one other thing she was deathly afraid of.

"Hey!" a guy's voice called out from behind her. Then, someone's hand grabbed her shoulder. She gasped and froze. She quickly turned around and saw a familiar guy from her English class. "I'm Ryan. Ryan Evans." He pulled his hand away from her shoulder and offered it to her. She took it and they shook. He pulled it away as Cloe turned away from him and continued walking. Ryan followed her.

"So," he said to her while they walked, "I saw you met Miss. Darbis. She's kind of nice once you get to know her." Cloe nodded and kept walking. "You're new here. You know the girl in the back of the class? She got here the day school started after winter break." he continued, "Junior year is pretty tough and being new doesn't help." "And…" Cloe urged him to get to the point.

"And…I'm just saying that if you need someone to talk to, she'll be able to help." he finished, "Well… she's not the only one who's willing to help, if you need anything." Cloe stopped, turned to look at him, and said, "What do you want from me?" "Well, my sister and I always meet the new kids and try to help them…for lack of a better word…fit in properly." he answered. "Thanks, but no thanks." Cloe said and turned around to walk away.

Ryan got in front of her, stopping her. "Don't be like that." he told her, putting her his hands on her shoulders and looking her in the eyes, "You're not afraid of my sister are you?" "Who?" Cloe asked. "You know, Sharpay." he answered. That last word rung in Cloe's ears. 'Sharpay?' she thought, 'My biggest fear.'

"Um. No." she stuttered, "Not at all. It's just that…" she removed herself from Ryan's grip, "…I have to go." She walked away and started to run. She turned a corner really quickly and collided with another person. "Ow." The girl's voice said. Cloe knelt in the spot on the floor where she'd landed. "I am so sorry." Cloe stated as she helped the girl pick up her books. "That's all right really. It's not a problem." the girl responded.

They looked up at each other both kneeling. The girl had long brown hair and was only slightly shorter than Cloe. She was wearing glasses and had an average waist size though Cloe was certain the girl was a bit under. "Hi, my name is Rachael." the girl said as she offered her hand. Cloe took it and said, "I'm Cloe." They smiled and released hands. Rachael grabbed her books and the girls stood up.

"So," Rachael questioned, "who were you running from?" "Ryan Evans." Cloe responded. "Really? I was running from Sharpay." Rachael squeaked. "Maybe Squeakers would be a better name for you." Cloe laughed. "Thanks." Rachael smiled, "And I can understand running from Sharpay, but why Ryan?" "Well, I really don't know why. If he's related to Sharpay, he can't be good news, right?" Cloe explained.

"What did he tell you?" Rachael asked curiously. "Well, he wanted to make sure that I fit in properly here. And that I should go to him, or Sharpay, or even that other new who sits in the back of my English. They're all Juniors." Cloe rolled her eyes. "Uh, oh." Rachael looked concerned. She grabbed Cloe's arm, made sure the coast was clear, and headed to the lockers with Cloe in toe.

"What?" Cloe asked a little worried, "Is that bad?" "Very. Sharpay is after me for the same reason. She practically runs this school." Rachael stated as they reached their lockers, which were coincidentally right next to each other, "They both attempt to get the school exactly how Sharpay sees fit." "Oh, I see." Cloe opened her locker and Rachael was already shoving books in hers, "You're saying, he wants to ensure that Sharpay's every command is fulfilled."

"Exactly. He's to get booted." Rachael closed her locker and turned to Cloe, "Cloe, Sharpay's getting him to set you straight. She figures that he'll get you to find a clique that fits and stick with it." They started walking down the hallway. "Is there an explanation as to why you're running from Sharpay?" Cloe asked suspiciously. "Have you seen Sharpay?" Rachael asked implying the answer.

"Yes, actually, I have." Cloe replied, "She's in my English class. Both she and Miss. Darbis scare me." "Ooh. You have to suffer with both of them?" Rachael sympathized, "Good luck." "So, this is what a day at East High is like." Cloe sighed as the two girls walked down the stairs onto the campus.

"I know. It's all part of a minor detail called our future." Rachael said, "Well, I've got to go. See you tomorrow by the lockers?" "Works for me." Cloe responded, waving, then added, "Squeakers." Rachael laughed, "That's kinda catchy. I'll have to come up with one for you." "You do that!" Cloe said as Rachael waved and walked towards her mother's car. Cloe sighed.

"How long do I have to put up with this stuff?" she wondered, "But, on the bright sight, I've made a friend and an enemy all in one day. That's quicker than at my old school." She watched Rachael get in the car and ride away. "I better walk home." She thought as she started walking across the campus.

She had just reached the sidewalk when she heard a familiar voice call at her, "Hey. Wait up." She looked over her shoulder to see Ryan a few feet behind her standing near a wooden table. Sharpay was witting there with a smug smile on her face. Ryan was waving to her. She turned around and ran away as fast as she could and wouldn't stop until she got home.

(A/N) How was chapter 1? It was an idea I came up with one night. I'm not even sure I remember what I was thinking about when I decided to write this one. This is my first fic, so I would appreciate it if you would comment on it. Please, R&R!