Warnings: Crack-y humor.

Pairings: Reno/Demyx, Tifa/Leon, very subtly implied Reno/Cloud

Sassy's Note: Yargh. Jedi told me to, so I wrote it to make myself feel better. I don't, but you guys still get this retarded little gem of a fic.

"Hey, Dem," Reno chuckled from the other room. "Come here."

"What?" Demyx poked his head around the corner and into the bedroom. Reno was standing by the bed, looking amused and holding something up. "Whatcha got?"

"Looks like Tifa and Leonhart had a little bit of fun house-sitting for us the other night," said the redhead, smirking and holding up a lacy black thing. Demyx gaped at it.

"Eww! Is that what I think it is!?"

"Yup. Bra." Reno twirled it around a finger, examining it. "Has to be Lockheart's. No one else has a rack like this, yo."

"Reno!" Demyx yelped, mortified. "Eww, put it down!"

"Why? They left it in our bed."

"They… they… in our… EWW!"

"It's not like we haven't done the same thing. Numerous times, I might add, yo."

"It's different!"

"Just 'cause Lockheart has boobs and you don't?"

"It's weird!" Demyx's face formed a pout. He marched over to the bed and immediately began stripping off the sheets.

"Uhm, Dem, babe, what are you doing?" Reno asked, perplexed.

"What does it look like?"

"Like you're stripping our bed."

"Exactly."

Reno laughed. "Dem, we totally should have expected that. We did ask newlyweds to watch our house for the weekend."

Demyx's nose wrinkled as he gathered all the sheets and comforter in his arms. "Yeah. Remind me never to do that again."

Reno just continued twirling one of the lace straps around a finger as Demyx stomped out of the bedroom to the laundry room. He chuckled. The boy was adorable sometimes, especially when he was flustered. Reno personally didn't have a problem if everyone he knew had a romp in his bed. He supposed it was a fair trade. He'd done it pretty much in all his friends' beds – not to mention on most of their kitchen counters, their couches, and Rude's shower. But those incidents hadn't been with Demyx. They'd been with… eh, he wasn't going to think about that.

Shaking his head of the unpleasant memories, he grinned deviously and snatched up Tifa's bra again. He found Demyx loading the washing machine with liberal amounts of detergent. The blond had a determined look on his face as he closed the lid. Reno chuckled. Demyx glared him.

"Shut up."

"Did I say anything?"

"You were about to."

"Nope. I wasn't."

Demyx scowled and pushed past his lover. "Idiot," he muttered. Reno, silly grin on his face, busying himself with slipping his arms through the straps and getting those damn hooks attached. It took a few tries and more than a few moments, but he got it on and ran after Demyx. He found his musician digging through a box of sheet music, sitar materialized beside him. The redhead cleared his throat.

"What? Gonna invite someone else to come do it in our bed?"

"Nah. Figured we could give it a go."

Demyx snorted and looked up, mouth opened, but he stopped when he saw that lacy thing clasped tightly over Reno's shirt. The blond choked and began laughing at the odd sight of the Turk with a bra on top of his shirt.

"Reno," he gasped out. "You idiot."

The Turk just grinned. "Whatcha say, yo? Time to reinstate our claim to the bed?"

"Whatever." Demyx stood up. "Just lose the bra. You don't have the boobs for it."

"Glad you think so."

The bra was tossed carelessly across the living room, landing to hang off a portrait of a gorgeous man with clear eyes and slight smile. Strife had always been far more into cross-dressing that Demyx had anyway.

-end-

Sassy: Shiva, what's up with my depressing undertones? I'll tell you what: today sucks. If I can't be happy, neither can my OTP. So there. Bleh. I'm going to go paint some more.