Well, She Was There got a good response (surprisingly) so I'm doing the sequel He Was There.
This one is more true to me style, in terms of the whole crackish, funny thing, but I discovered this format in general is just plain hard to write! I thought it was going to be easy but now it's just getting to be, "Well, DUH he was there, it's about him ain't it? I though I was going to get at least one review like that but thankfully, there were none.
This kinda skips a little part. She Was There left of at them getting married, but this kinda skips ahead to when they're like 22 or something and Tenten gets…well..you'll see.
Disclaimer: Mhhm… The only thing I would own is the idea for this story, but not the actual characters. I wish I did though, it would be so awesome. The things I could do…
He was there. He was always there…kinda.
He was there when she got the results of her pregnancy tests back. He was hiding underneath the bed, hoping she wouldn't notice him. Especially since he could count at least fifty things within arms length of Tenten that could be used to impale him. Through the nuts.
He was there when she first started experiencing cravings. And made him run to the store to buy pickles and chocolate. Then run back out and buy some mozzarella cheese. And then go and buy some fish. And then some pizza. And cookies. And raisins. And soda. And milk. At two in the morning.
And she didn't eat ANY of it.
He was there when she first suspected him of cheating. It was three and the morning and he was just getting back from a two week mission, looking forward to taking a nice, hot shower and then curling up to his nice, sweet tempered-
"Where the hell were you?!?" Tenten screamed.
"What?" Neji asked.
"Do you have any idea what time it is?"
"Um…three in the morning?"
"Exactly! Now where were you?"
"A mission."
"…Uhuh…"
"What?"
"…Who is she?"
"What?"
"WHO IS SHE?!?"
"What are you talking about?"
"The girl you're seeing!"
"What girl?"
"Don't play stupid Hyuuga Neji, you're seeing some girl behind my back!"
"WHAT? No, I'm not! You're the only girl I'm seeing or ever have seen."
"…It's Lee then, isn't it."
"What?"
"If it's not a girl, then it's a guy, and Lee is the only choice."
"…You're crazy."
"DO NOT CALL ME CRAZY! WHAT HAS LEE GOT THAT I DON'T?"
"…A penis?"
"…" SLAP.
Neji found himself spending the night on the couch.
He was there the first time she had an ultrasound. He commented on how it looked like some sort of deformed rabbit thing.
For the second time that week, he was sleeping on the couch.
It was only Tuesday.
He was there the first time she was INCREADIBLY clingy and needy once he got back from a mission. It was three and the morning and he was just getting back from a two week mission, looking forward to taking a nice, hot shower and then curling up to his nice, sweet tempered-
"OH MY GOD! NEJI! I MISSED YOU! OH MY GOD, I WAS SO WORRIED!" Tenten sobbed into the front of his ANBU vest.
Well, it was better than last time when she practically killed him. So he just hugged her back. He was finally seeing the nice girl he married until-
"Eww…you smell like man."
"What?"
"And I don't mean Axe or Old Spice, but sweaty male just got back from a mission and hasn't showered smell."
"…"
"…That means go take a shower or you'll be sleeping on the couch!"
Neji never remembered having taken a faster shower.
But he still ended up on the couch. She never told him why.
He was there when Tenten went to find out weather it was a girl or a boy.
And it was a boy. And a girl.
Twins.
He was going to die.
He was there when Tenten went to the library to pick out books full of baby names. They spent four hours looking through the books, then Neji spent six hours sleeping while Tenten kept looking through the books.
Later, when she found out he was asleep during that time, she got mad and went on a rant about how he didn't love her or the babies and that he didn't care and blah blah blah…
He ended up sleeping on the couch. At Lee's house.
He no longer even had the luxury of sleeping on his own couch. One that he himself had picked out that was very comfortable and even could extend to be a bed. He had gotten it after the 46th time he found himself sleeping not in his room.
He was there when she went into labor. He panicked, ran around the room fifteen times, then ran to his sensei's house to ask what to do.
Gai just told Neji to wait there and he would take Tenten to the hospital for him. Though Gai still wishes he had a camera so he could take a picture of Neji freaking out, ripping out his hair, on the verge of tears.
He was there in the delivery room.
For about two seconds before she yelled at him and Sakura threw him out.
He was there in the hallway for nearly ten hours with Lee, terrified and traumatized by the sound of his wife screaming. No matter how…cruel she had been lately, he still loved her.
As to weather or not she still loved him, he didn't know.
But he preferred to just think she did.
He was there right after the babies were born, standing tentatively in the doorway just looking at the twins and his wife for about fifteen minutes until Sakura shoved him into the room.
He was there when it was time to name the babies.
They named the girl Yin and the boy Yang.
And she wouldn't let him hold them.
"Why not?"
"You'd probably drop them."
"I wouldn't drop my own kids!"
"…Sure."
The crappy end! I want to cry, this came out so bad! I wrote it in about an hour, and I be ASHAMED.
But of course, I must post it…
I guess I'll update my other two stories while I'm in the writing mood.
Ja ne!