Pseudotree's fanfic.

Disclaimer –I do not own The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi.

Something you should be aware of –When I said 'more…"Kyon-like"' in the summary, I really, REALLY meant MORE. Also, note the "" (quotation marks).

Summary –This is a story in which Kyon behaves more…"Kyon-like" than in the original series. Many laughs, many tears. Also features Kyon-pursuing Haruhi.

O

...?

When the droning went on

And the clock tick-tocked by

All that I could do was sigh.

"-AND GRABBING ME, THE ESPER TRIED TO HOLD ME DOWN! IF ONLY I COULD SMASH THIS BASTARD'S FACE IN-"

"Please! Calm down!"

"You weren't supposed to hear us!"

Even after being let out

For the rest of the day,

Nothing came about to play.

"THE LIARS AND CHEATS STARED DOWN AT MY VULNERABLE FIGURE WITH MURDEROUS INTENT, HELD BACK ONLY BY THE FACT THAT I WAS IMPORTANT TO THEIR MISSION!"

"No one wants to kill anyone here! Please, calm down! We're your friends!"

"What you heard back there was... You're misunderstanding our intenti-"

"LIES, LIES, LIES, LIES-"

But now I've founded

A place, a gathering,

So we can do some wandering.

"-THEY WERE NEVER THE FRIENDLY BUNCH GETTING CAUGHT UP IN THE ECCENTRIC GIRL'S SHENANIGANS. THEY WERE PROFESSIONALS THROUGH AND THROUGH, DOING THEIR JOBS AS AGENTS-"

"Stop! I beg you! Please trust us!"

"Trust us!"

"-THEY HELD THE CARDS, AND HAD THE PERFECT MOTIVE! WHAT CAN COME BEFORE SAVING THE WORLD?! EVEN NOW, STRUGGLING TO HOLD ME BACK FROM EXPOSING THEM, BEING ACCUSED OF HAVING DONE THE MISDEEDS THAT SHOULD HAVE MADE THEM FLINCH IN GUILT, THEY ARE PERFECTLY DETACHED ON THE INSIDE!"

"No!"

Come, my fantastic friends,

Let us dream and frolic,

Madly, and not being melancholic.

"WHAT DID IT M-MATTER TO THEM IF THEY HAD TO MANIPULATE A SILLY BOY AND A GIRL IN THE BACKGROUND, SECRETLY AND SUBTLY ALTERING EVERY ACTIONS FOR THE PURPOSE OF SATISFYING THEIR MASTERS?! THEIR MASTERS' IDEAL VISION OF A SAFE, STABLE WORLD! T-THEY WERE THE GODDAMN TWO-FACED AGENTS, THE CHEERFUL AND SHY AND EASY-GOING IDENTITIES THEY PUT ON AS FAKE AS THE TEARS CURRENTLY STREAMING DOWN THEIR FACES-"

"No, we're not! Please trust us. W-what we did was-"

"OF COURSE THEY WOULD MAKE PATHETIC ATTEMPTS AT DEFENDING THEMSELVES! THEY... THEY HAD NO IDEA. NO IDEA HOW PAINFUL IT IS FOR ME TO HAVE HAD THE THOUGHT! TO BEGIN DOUBTING! TO REALIZED HOW MUCH SENSE IT WOULD MAKE! T-THEY HAD THE POWER, THE MOTIVE, THE-"

"Please, I..."

"..."

"...I suppose we don't have a choice."

"You mean-"

"YOU CAN ALL LIE TO YOURSELVES FOREVER THAT WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING WAS THE BEST FOR EVERONE, BUT-"

"I-I request that...

...that...

...

...I r-request that he... forget."

Never mind why

You have come before me.

I did not start this club to worry.

"...HOLY SHIT."

"I... accept the request."

"YOU WERE ALL... DON'T TELL ME THAT..."

"You'll only be... Oh, god! I-I'm so sorry, but... Y-you will only be forgetting whatever happened in the last two hours, okay? We're sorry we have to do this to you. And... and although you won't remember, please, please tell me that you trust us. Trust that we didn't intend nor tried to-"

"A-AS I SAW MY ALIEN FRIE-

...ALIEN CLUB MEMBER APPROACHING ME TO DO WHAT HAD TO BE DONE, IT OCCURRED TO ME THAT... THAT THEY HAVE PROBABLY-"

"We're so sorry!"

"This has to be done! Please understand!"

"H-HOW MANY TIMES HAVE THEY APOLOGIZED LIKE THIS?! HOW MANY TIMES DID THE PEOPLE I PLAYED CHECKERS WITH JUST THE DAY BEFORE KNEELED BESIDE ME, BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS?! JUST HOW MANY TIMES

DID

I

FORGEt-"

Dream and frolic,

Dream and frolic!

Why be reminded of your troubles?!

Dream and frolic,

Dream and frolic!

Knowing will get me caught in your troubles!

Dream and frolic,

Dream and frolic!

Getting caught in all of your fantastic troubles!

I have finally founded

A gathering for wandering,

So melancholy can get dissolving.

My fantastic friends gathered

Before the strange, crazy pervert,

Then we wandered, played and flung some yogurt.

Come, my fantastic friends,

Let us dream and frolic,

Madly, and not being melancholic.

Never mind why

You have come before me.

I did not start this club to worry.

Dream and frolic,

Dream and frolic.

Let us dream and frolic.

-Pseudotree

...?

"..."

...?!

Chapter 16

The Rift

The girl stared up at the beaming face of the stranger, a feeling of apprehension nudging her. Or was that her friend at the side poking her urgently to get the heck out of there?

"Hehehe..." chuckled the stranger, sending goosebumps up the two younger occupants of the park. "So you must be her, right? You're cuter than I thought."

Fingers twitched.

"Umm..." she began. This weirdo was giving her the creeps. "Who might you be?"

"Oh, I suppose we haven't really met until now, have we? But I've heard about you. A LOT about you. Never mentioned how adorable you were, though."

"H-hey let's g-g-get out of-"

"So, hey! Why don't the two of you come with me so that we can get a bit more... familiar?"

The little girls dashed.

"HELP!"

"CREEP!"

"PERVERT!"

"KIDNAPPER!"

"W-wait! I'm not a..." Haruhi yelped, chasing after them. "I-I know your brother! I got his number and everything!"

The two dashed faster and somehow outran the older girl, a prodigy athlete. This lady was dangerous!

"So."

"...Yeah?"

"So, how does it feel, joining the club within the club?"

Kyon gave him a look as the question was posed, to which the Esper smiled as a response. "Well, if you want to put it that way..."

(A pair of eyes from the back of the room stared, as if attempting to record his reply.)

The boy shrugged as an answer. "I don't know. I mean, what can I do? Seems like I'll just get dragged along and stuff, caught up in everyone else's pace. Meh."

"Hmm, maybe. But it wouldn't feel complete without you, Kyon."

"...But it wouldn't feel complete without you, Suzumiya-san."

"Damn straight!" the energetic girl replied, pumping her fist.

She weaved through the maze of shelves, certainty in her steps. The girl's eyes did not meet any of the books nor sign put up all over, as she did not need indicators. She was told where, what, and when.

"I know exactly how things will turn out."

Mikuru stopped suddenly at the astrophysics section, then reached to her side without turning and picked a book.

"I will open this book to page 48, and press the clover I've picked from the field."

From her pocket she produced a small, green envelope, stuck it between the book, and closed it shut.

"I am the hands and feet." she uttered, re-shelving the item two books away from its original place.

Walking briskly away, Mikuru turned this way and that until she came to the biology section beside the window, and bent over a chair nearby. After much tinkering, she stood back up and left it briskly.

"I am the hands and feet. I will avoid from pondering over the clover. I will execute."

"I will avoid from pondering over the chair. I will execute."

"I will find from time to time others like me. I know exactly how things will turn out. I will find from time to time those who act like others like me. I know exactly how things will turn out."

"I will

I will find from time to time others like me who don't listen. I will find from time to time among the allied factions others who don't listen."

"I know exactly how things will turn out. I am the hand that silences."

She snaked her way deeper and deeper into the walls of books, going farther and farther to the rarely visited. Mikuru stopped again between some hardcovers and the leather-bound.

"I know exactly how I will execute. I am theNO MA'AM I DO NOT SEE ANY PROBLEMS WITH THE ORDER, MA'AM-"

"...I know exactly how things will turn out."

Soft footsteps came from some meters away. It drew closer, until a familiar figure emerged from the shelf to Mikuru's right. He wasn't smiling.

"I know exactly how things will turn out." she uttered to Koizumi or herself.

From her pocket she produced another item, this time a small notebook sized book. Holding it between her thumb and forefinger, the girl spoke as if addressing audiences on stage.

"I will shelve this unto the space beside the blue hardcover on the left, on the fifth row."

She did.

"You will now take it out of the shelf. Because although I was given the order to

Proceed

you were told to

Obstruct

and therefore..."

Koizumi silently pulled the book from the shelf, frowning slightly.

"You will then shelve it three books to the right. Afterwards, I will take it out and shelve it again three books to the left."

Koizumi shelved the book three books to the right, then Mikuru took it out and shelved it three books to the left.

"You will then take the book out, look skeptically at me, then pause uncomfortably. Shaking your head, you make a move to shelve but stop yourself, grit your teeth, then clutch your head.

Koizumi took the book out again to re-shelve, giving her a sceptical look, but realized that she could be tricking him by purposely shelving it wrong. He dismissed the thought because if that was the case, there was no guarantee of him shelving it right. But he promptly stopped himself from putting it back four books to the right as it occurred to him that maybe she doesn't need it to be at a specific place, as long as it isn't the first place she put it. He got confused and clutched his head.

"You will then sigh in relief as I reveal that there are no such tricks involved whatsoever. You raise a single eyebrow shortly after, probably wondering why I revealed that. I tell you that I was told that I will reveal it. I was told that I will reveal it. You shelve it to the right, two books away, I take it and shelve it back where I first put it. You take it again and shelve it on the shelf on the other side, and I take it back out."

...Sigh.

Shelve.

Pick.

Shelve.

Pick.

Shelve.

Pick.

"You grab the book in annoyance and hold it up over your head."

Swish. Wave wave.

"I punch you in the stomach, grab it back, and shelve it."

Punch.

OOP!

Shelve.

"..."

"..."

Grab.

Pick.

Swish.

Snatch.

Punch.

Pow.

KICK.

SMACK.

CHOP.

SMASH.

CRUNCH.

SHING.

BLAM.

CUT.

SWORD.

SPELL-

"HOLY CRAP THAT HUR-"

"NOTHING PERSONAL-"

"SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

They promptly stopped. Nobody messes with Mrs. Takahashi, the school's librarian.

The sun began to set, as children scurried out of the park. Kicking an abandoned ball away to the side, Tomiko crossed the grassy field toward the entrance with her friend following closely behind. It was almost dinner time.

"...and ran right into the chair! That was just... wait, let's go around. This was where that creep chased us, right?"

"Oh! Yeah, we better. She really gave us a chase, didn't she? And guess what happened when I got home- I went straight to Kyon-kun's room to tell him, then his phone started to ring!"

"Oh my-"

"I know! I told him not to answer it, then he thought I was playing a game and answered it!"

"Was it her?"

"I'm not sure. He didn't look very worried, though."

They stopped at a water fountain for a sip, and Tomiko leaned against it as she waited for the other girl to finish. Shuffling her feet, she spoke up as she looked away toward the swing sets.

"Speaking of your brother, how is he doing?"

"..."

"...Hm?"

"..."

"...Hmm?"

"..."

Splash.

Her friend sputtered. "Ah, jeez! Would you mind stop doing that every single time?!"

"No." Tomiko replied, deadpan.

Rolling her eyes, the girl wondered if she should get back at her the same way next time. "Whatever. Yeah, he's fine. Seems like he joined a club, too."

"Oh? What club?"

She paused. "Actually, I'm not sure. I think he called it Y. E. L. P. or something."

"But didn't he mention what he does there?"

"Well, it doesn't really help me figure out what the club is about. One afternoon, he mentioned something about... err, black lace or something. The next day, he was stuffing his beach towel into his bag."

"...Oh. That actually sounds pretty fun."

"Yeah..." she answered, growing silent.

"..."

"...It's really nice to see that he has some friends to hang out with him..."

"..."

"...Friends that can see past his quirk..."

"..."

"I-it's so great to see him coming home with a smile on his-"

"..." Scrape scrape scrape...

"...What the hell are you doing?"

"Hmm? Oh, sorry. I was busy scraping this darn gum off my shoe. Gosh, it's stubborn..."

After receiving a light smack on her forehead, Tomiko let out a indignant yelp and chased her friend straight out of the park, off into the sunset. Payback beckons, and so does dinner.

"..."

...

"..." rustle rustle...

"...thats..." rustle rustle rustle...

A limp body suddenly emerged from a small bush near the fountain, and plopped ungracefully onto the grassy field. The figure stared open-mouthed up into the orange sky, limbs and torso twitching from the pain that could have been avoided if she just kept out of the darn shrub. (hiding in there to, err, watch over the children wasn't as easy as they made it seem on TV) But that wasn't why she went completely numb.

"..That's not..." she murmured again, lip quivering.

"...Friends that can see past his quirk..."

"Heh... ha ha..." laughed the girl hollowly, shaking her head. "It's not like I... It's not like..."

Suzumiya Haruhi was in turmoil.

Here was a girl who, unlike many others, fulfilled her desire to encounter the unusual, from a bookworm alien to a time-traveller for playing dress up with, and even a ESP user who fought a shiny monster thing in her city. She even saw "god" regularly, and just hours before found him contemplating whether or not to get the pudding or manjuu at her school's cafeteria. They came to her as friends, and shared wonderful times together. But what if she was... Could she have been...

'Could I have been friendly to them just because of their strangeness?'

She knew that if they were to have been perfectly "normal", her interest in them would have been much lower than they are. If it wasn't for that "something" which caught her eyes when she first saw them, she may not have even really met the wacky bunch. And Kyon... Well, he made quite an entrance into her life! But it's not like she... she's not...

A fit of laughter wreaked her all throughout, and she rolled slightly as she clutched at her sobbing face.

"...N-no, that's... Heh hehe... No, no. It's not like I just... It's not like I just latched onto Kyon because I wanted to bone some goddamn noisy freak! We-we're real friends now, aren't we? I think of him as a friend."

"...Friends that can see past his quirk-"

"...We're friends dammit!"

A flock of pigeons flew away from the area as her yell echoed the deserted park. Numbly watching the birds beat their wings up in the sky, Haruhi's breath began to steady and her body began relaxing on the cushy grass. After softly dabbing at her eyes with her sleeve, the girl rested her hand on her forehead, looking ready to doze off. "Dammit..."

It wasn't long afterwards when she suddenly shot up, realization striking. "...Dammit."

Holy shit.

Could... Kyon have been thinking that? Could he have also been thinking that she was... that she approached him solely because...

Her hands ran through her hair roughly as she recalled a particular oddity in the boy's behaviour last week.

"Hey, take it easy, prez! Just do what you could and be yourself."

The supply room somehow began to feel like the air has taken on a heavier atmosphere, as Kyon's face seemed to stiffen. "What... would you mean by suggesting that I 'be my self'? In what way could-"

'...He couldn't seriously have been thinking that I meant...'

Suzumiya Haruhi. First year high-school student. Within the span of few months, she found many, many things entering her life. Boredom. Excitement. Embarrassment. Enjoyment. Inner pervert. Club. An alien, time-traveller and esper. God.

Now she found despair.

O

Oo

Ooo

Author's Note

...Okay, I'm really sorry about the delay. Hopefully, I can now go back to the monthly schedule, at the very least.

Beta read by Kildred.