Disclaimer: I don't own anything concerning the Twilight Saga.
I AM SO SORRY that it took me so long to update, but I am back at university and my teachers are just killing me with stuff to do in English and Latin…. I have some time this weekend, though, and I hope I'll be able to write a little more!
Thank you to everyone who reviewed, I appreciate you comments very much and I love constructive criticism. So, please, feel free to review some more and help me with my story!
So, here is the fourth chapter…
This time I awoke to someone stroking my hair gently. I could hear little cooing noises in the backround, only very faint, showing me I was still not really in the land of the living.
"Shh, little girl, it's okay, mommy will be up soon", I heard a voice say that sounded like an angel singing.
And then it came rushing back to me again. The club, Jacob and someone with spiky black hair bouncing on my doorstep.
"Alice?", I mumbled groggily and opened my eyes to see my best friend sitting beside me on my bed with my baby girl in her arms. She hasn't changed. Of course, she hasn't, you idiot, I scolded myself mentally. She is a vampire.
The beautiful angel looked down on me and smiled. "Bella."
I didn't know that I could move so fast, but in the next moment I found myself clinging to her cold granite neck. She was proof. Proof that I haven't gone crazy for nothing. Proof that he existed somewhere in this world and that it wasn't just a dream, however unrequitted it may have been.
Alice must have seen what I intended to do because she quickly pulled Audrey out of harms way. I could feel the arm that wasn't holding my daughter slowly hugging me back.
"Bella. It's been so long. I missed you", she whispered against my hair.
I slowly pulled back from her cold body. I saw her looking me over, glancing at my small appartment and then at Audrey. "It seems like a lot has happened since we've seen each other last." Her face showed signs of disapproval.
I glanced at the used carpet on my floor; many small holes made it look more like Swiss cheese than something to cover a surface. Audrey's crib was old and beaten, as was my bed that I had found on a sale in a small run-down warehouse. I knew my living arrangements were far from being the Taj Mahal, but it was all I had. I wasn't about to let another person judge me.
"Well, what did you expect to find? Me winning the lottery living in the Hollywood Hills and wearing brand clothes like you always tried to force me into?" She looked taken aback by my snapping. Probably surprised that the gullible Bella she knew was gone. But that is what life makes of you, if it doesn't treat you fairly. A zombie.
My reply was probably rude to the extreme, but I couldn't help it. It's been so many years. When she spoke her words like that, it sounded as if I had somehow disappointed her, as I had failed. But she didn't understand. When they left they had taken my future away from me, my plans, my dreams, everything. My love. It all fell apart. And here I am now, living in a rotten place very few people would ever be able to call home, even after a renovation, being constantly broke and having to raise a kid on on my own. Maybe I'm exaggerating, she hasn't really said anything, but the look on her face seems to tell the whole story. She has no right, whatsoever, to judge me.
I reached around her to take Audrey in my arms and then I stood up and put her into her bed. She cooed again, having no clue yet about the world and how harsh it could be. And I hope she will never find out, I thought.
I straightened up and headed to the living room without a second glance at my visitor.
"Bella, wait. I didn't mean it like that", she started, but I cut her off.
"What did you mean then?" I whirled around and gazed at her. It was nearly too much, her beauty, her presence, a symbol for everything I have lost and will never again gain.
"I just meant that we didn't expect to find you in such a predicament", she said, and as she saw that I wasn't about to interrupt her again, she continued. "I knew that you weren't going to just move past him, I tried to tell him that as he made the decision to leave you, but he wouldn't listen. Nevertheless, I didn't think that by the time we would return, because I knew that he wouldn't be able to apart from you for too long, that you would be in such a bad shape. It is much worse than I ever thought it would be."
I was frozen on the spot. She was talking about him. But what was she saying about returning? I didn't understand. And I couldn't bear it. I wasn't ready to hear every little detail about why I wasn't enough for him. I didn't know if I would ever be ready. But I couldn't tell her to stop, then she would leave, my connection to him would leave and I might never have the chance to see him again. I had to keep her here. So, instead of stopping the torment, I urged her on.
"What do you mean 'we'?", I whispered finally.
"We are all here, Bella." She smiled.
"Are you here because of me?" I watched her face closely to see her reaction. And I felt shock ripple through my entire body, as I saw it.
Her voice reflected the emotion shown on her face. "There are laws, even in our world, that have to be followed, and there are beings that punish those who do not keep to the laws. The existence of vampires has to be kept a secret and the lives of those who know too much are forfeit", her topaz eyes burned into mine, "and you, Bella, know too much. They are coming for you."
I hadn't known her for very long, but Alice had always been the source of positiveness in her family. Which is probably why it shocked me to see so much fear in her eyes.
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