Dear Mello,

You're gone now, and have been for, like, a week. I'm keeping track. I put little x's on my calender, even though I know the x's will never stop because you're never coming back. I've pretty much come to accept the fact that I'll probably never see you again. It's kinda cool. Everyone needs someone to miss.

I was told that I should visit the shrink. You know, the person that shows up, like, once a week for the mentally unstable children? Yeah. He's the reason I'm writing this letter. He told me I should. I said, "Why? He'll never read it." and he said, "That's good, though. You'll say more." and yeah, I don't know. It seems kind of stupid--- writing a letter you'll never read.

Near... Yeah. Near. Sometimes I talk to Near. Sometimes he hears me crying and he touches my shoulder. It's kind of scary, because his touch is really cold. He's not fun to talk to, but it's nice, because without him... I wouldn't have anyone else. And, yeah... I stole his first kiss. I'm sorry, Mello. You stole mine, though. I just wanted to know what it feels like. He looked at me real apathetic-like and he didn't say anything. "Sorry," I said, and he just said, "Whatever makes you feel better." It's cool, I guess.

I play these little stories in my head. Like movies. I try to imagine where you are, and what you're doing. And I see you. And you're always happy; happy, without me. So I stop thinking about it and I try to go to sleep. Then, I start crying, and Near hears me, and it's, like, this stupid vicious cycle that I just can't keep from happening. And I want it to stop.

But I know it won't stop unless you come back.

Anyway, I'm gonna put this in an envelope and keep it under my pillow or something. It kinda makes me feel close to you. It's nice. Maybe I'll write you more. And maybe you'll get to read them one day. Whatever.

- Matt

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Notes and stuff: I wish I could tell you what made me want to write that. XD I quasi-timed myself. It took four minutes. Hope you like it. Review, plz.