A/N: Heh, as you can see, I like to write about uncommon fanfiction ideas, seeing as I think there's only one other fanfiction with Jiraiya and Sasuke as the main characters. It's just that whenever I think about these two, I always wondered how they would react if they had to spend time with each other, and that's how I came up with this. This took me FOREVER to type up, because I wrote it down first, and it took up 34 ½ pages in my notebook! Pretty crazy, right? (Thank God I'm a fast typer; that keyboarding class paid off) I hope I didn't make them too OOC. I hope you enjoy it, and I don't mind criticism but please no flames! ^_^
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did, Itachi would have gone blind a long time ago and would be walking around wearing blind glasses and smacking into trees. (Heh, I've
gotten a little more creative with the disclaimer.)
Not So Bad, But I Still Dislike You
"You want me to do WHAT?" the white haired Sannin exclaimed.
Tsunade sighed in frustration. "I said that I want you to spend the day with-"
"I heard what you said; I mean why are you making me do it? I hate that brat!"
"I'm telling you to do it because of that very reason. I don't think you should hate him."
"You don't like him either!" Jiraiya pointed out.
"Yes, it's true that he gets on my nerves when he disobeys my orders and acts like he's better than everyone else. However, Naruto annoys me by doing small things like that, too. I don't hate either of them.
"You, on the other hand, hate him for all the wrong reasons."
"All the wrong reasons?" Jiraiya exclaimed angrily. "He's like a mini Orochimaru! He's exactly like him, and you think it's wrong to hate him for that?"
"Yes, I do!" Tsunade said firmly. "He may be similar to Orochimaru in many ways; he looks like him, he attracts as many girls as Orochimaru did and doesn't care, and they both have very cold attitudes. However, that doesn't mean he'll choose the same path that Orochimaru did."
"Yes, he will!" Jiraiya insisted angrily. "He'll do exactly what Orochimaru did! He'll abandon his village and his friends for power!"
"Not if we try our best to divert him from that path. If you keep insisting that he'll be just like Orochimaru, then he will. You need to do the exact opposite of what you're doing; you have to have hope in him that he'll make the right choice."
Jiraiya let Tsunade's words melt into him, knowing that she was right, like always. He sighed, standing up to leave. "Fine, but as soon as the clock strikes 5:00 PM, I'm done. I'm only spending eight hours with the kid."
"Good. Have lunch, go see a movie, whatever. I'm not expecting you to bond or anything, just understand each other. Now go; he should be at his house, I think."
Jiraiya grumbled something as he pushed open the doors exiting the Hokage's office.
"Oh, one more thing," Tsunade said thoughtfully. Jiraiya did not turn around, but he froze in mid-step. "I haven't told Sasuke about this yet, so expect to receive a rebellious refusal."
Jiraiya twitched and cast a glare at the grinning woman behind him. Slamming the door behind him, the Sannin stormed out of the office. This was just great; Sasuke was going to put him through hell and back. Heck, then entire eight hours might be spent trying to make the boy agree. Oh, how he hated that Uchiha.
xXx
Crimson was the only color that caught Jiraiya's eye. Blood was splattered everywhere; staining the ground and the walls. He knew it dried up years ago, but the scene still chilled his very bones. Kunai and shuriken were embedded in the abandoned houses as far as the eye could see. Jiraiya stretched out his hand to touch the nearest kunai but shrunk back, for he could almost feel the horrible history of the downfall of the prestigious Uchiha clan dispersing from it, and he felt it best not to disturb history.
The white haired Sannin continued on the path to the very center of the abandoned compound, taking care not to step in dried blood or on any upturned kunai. How can Sasuke live in a place like this? Jiraiya thought with a shudder. The memories of that night surround him everywhere…the blood of his family members, the weapons that belong to Itachi which were used to kill them…how can he stand it? I would've moved to an apartment.1
"Hey, what are you doing here?" a voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and it was by no means welcoming.
"What are you doing here?" Jiraiya snapped back, but then mentally hit himself. He lives here, stupid!
Sasuke raised an eyebrow and then shrugged. "Whatever, I'm leaving."
"Wait, where are you going?" Jiraiya asked, catching his arm.
"Kakashi," Sasuke replied simply. "He promised he'd teach me a new move today. Now let go."
"No can do, brat. Your appointment with Kakashi has been delayed. I'm afraid you're spending the day with me."
"What are you talking about?" Sasuke demanded, a look of surprise and horror creasing his features.
"I'm not happy about it either, but it's the Hokage's orders. We have to spend eight hours together and learn to "understand" each other, whatever that means," Jiraiya grumbled, releasing Sasuke's arm and crossing his own.
"Too bad," Sasuke replied as the raven haired boy shoved his hands in his pockets and began to walk away.
"What do you mean "too bad"?" Jiraiya asked, once again gripping the boy's arm. "It's the Hokage's orders."
"Since when have I ever obeyed orders I didn't want to follow? I don't care if she's the Hokage; I won't spend the day with you."
Jiraiya's grip loosened on the boy slightly. You…the Uchiha said that word with venom, a lot of it. What exactly did I do to make him hate me? Jiraiya wondered. Well, he dislikes nearly everyone actually..
Sasuke ripped his arm from the older man's grip and turned around. "What are you still doing here?" he snapped, glancing over his shoulder. "Leave, I'm not going with you."
"Sorry," Jiraiya said, "but I don't take orders from brats." Then, lifting the surprised boy up by his collar, he slammed him into the wall of his own house as gently as he could. He would've been rougher with the Uchiha, but he was restrained by the fear of what Tsunade would do to him.
"Let me guess," Sasuke growled, "we can either do this the easy way or the hard way?"
"Hm, pretty good, brat." Jiraiya sneered, although his voice held no praise. "Now, which will it be? Be warned, the hard way is me tossing you over my shoulder and forcing you everywhere. You wouldn't want your Uchiha pride to be ruined, would you?"
Sasuke glared at him venomously. The bastard knew exactly where to poke to make me agree. "Fine," the raven haired boy finally spat. "But be warned; I'm going to make your day hell."
Jiraiya smirked. "I didn't expect any less."
Instead of lowering the boy gently to the ground, the Sannin swiftly released him. However, the boy didn't fall on his butt like Jiraiya wanted, but instead landed gracefully on his feet. Damn it…well I guess he's not called a prodigy for nothing.
"Where are we going first?" Sasuke asked, trying not to sound too interested.
"Hmm…" Jiraiya pondered, stomach growling. "Let's get something to eat. Persuading a stubborn Uchiha brat is hungry work."
"I'm not hungry though," Sasuke grumbled, but it fell on deaf ears. Jiraiya pretended not to hear him.
"So, where should we eat?" Jiraiya wondered more to himself than to Sasuke as they exited the Uchiha district and entered Konoha's chain of shops and restaurants.
"Anywhere but Ichiraku's," Sasuke mumbled, although he knew the question wasn't directed at him.
"How about here?" Jiraiya suggested, ignoring Sasuke's comment.
The avenger gazed up at the sign, recognizing it as the natto and sweets shop that Kakashi had invited him to before; on the day he met Itachi again after five years.
"What's the matter?" Jiraiya asked more out of curiosity than concern as he noticed Sasuke's fists clench and red seep into his eyes.
"Nothing," Sasuke growled, unclenching his fists and allowing the crimson of his sharingan to leak out.
"It's not nothing; your palms are bleeding where you nails bit into them," Jiraiya pointed out. "Give me your hands."
"They're fine," the Uchiha snapped, shifting out of the older man's reach.
"Give me your hands," Jiraiya repeated more firmly. Then, seeing as the Uchiha wasn't going to willingly oblige, roughly grabbed them himself.
"I said they're fine!" Sasuke stubbornly insisted, but allowed Jiraiya to wrap his hands in gauze.
"Jeez, you're just like Orochimaru," Jiraiya commented with a sigh. "You're too stubborn to let others help you." The white haired Sannin thought he saw a flash of annoyance in the boy's eyes, but he wasn't sure. He finished knotting the bandages then let the Uchiha quickly pull his hands out of the Sannin's grip. "What, no thank you? I wonder how Kakashi puts up with your rudeness."
"He doesn't really give a shit," Sasuke responded.
"Is your language normally this bad, or is it just towards me?"
"I'm like this toward everybody."
"Don't speak of it as if you're proud of it. It's not a good thing," Jiraiya scolded.
"I'm not proud of it. I never said I wanted to be this way." Sasuke froze, realizing what words just slipped out of his mouth. "Let's go," he said quickly, stepping into the restaurant to hopefully make Jiraiya forget what he said and remember his hunger. However, Jiraiya was not deterred that easily and caught his arm for the third time that day.
"You never wanted to be the way you are? Then why did you let yourself become this way?"
"I didn't let myself become this way. He made me what I am!" the frustrated Uchiha spat.
"Don't blame Itachi for the person you've become! It's not his fault you've become the cold, unfeeling brat you are now!"
"Why are you defending him? Why are you defending the man who took away my entire family?"
Both of their voices had reached a level to where they were almost screaming at each other. Good thing there weren't a lot of people around…
"I'm not defending him, Sasuke! I'm telling you that you're wrong!" Jiraiya barked, slamming the younger male into the wall. "It's true that him massacring your clan was bound to have some affect on you, but it was your choice on whether to let it continue affecting you or not!
"You could've let Sakura and Naruto in, you could've let them become family to you, but you chose to cling onto the past and your revenge, and that's what made you who you are! The choices that a person makes decide who they really are, not the things that happen to them!
"That's the wonderful gift that we've been given," Jiraiya continued softly, "the ability to choose." He released Sasuke, but the boy remained leaning against the wall, eyes downcast.
"Was, could've, and chose, they're all past-tense words that you used. Why are you speaking as if it's too late to change things?" the avenger whispered, avoiding the older man's eyes.
"…because it is too late," Jiraiya replied, his voice equally as quiet as Sasuke's. "It's too late because of this." He pulled down Sasuke's collar slightly and prodded the curse mark.
"I'm not like him. I won't go to him for power."
"Yes, you will," Jiraiya whispered, too quietly for the boy to hear. The white haired man lifted his finger up in surprise when something splashed onto it. "Blood…" he whispered, turning his attention to Sasuke's face. Small streams of blood were dribbling down his face from his skull. I must've slammed him into the wall harder than I thought! He ran his fingers through Sasuke's dark hair as he gently prodded at his head. He sighed in relief. "Your head isn't cracked, just bruised pretty badly. C'mon, I'll fix you up in here."
Being surprisingly gentle with the boy, Jiraiya ushered him into the natto and sweets shop and sat him down in a chair. He was slightly surprised by Sasuke's cooperative attitude, but blamed it on the bruise. "Wait here; I'll go get a glass of water and a towel."
Sasuke did as he was told (for once) and Jiraiya hurried back with the water and one of those things that are used to wrap up forks and knives in and set at tables.
"Stay still," the older man commanded as he dipped the cloth in the water and gently wiped the blood off the boy's face. He then relocated the bruise and dabbed at it as carefully as he could. Jiraiya eventually went to get a new cloth when the one he was using became drenched in Sasuke's blood. "Hold this to the bruise," Jiraiya instructed, dipping the cloth in the fresh water, having dumped out the bloody water, and pressing it into Sasuke's hand.
The Uchiha once again did as he was told (surprisingly). Jiraiya leaned over him and plucked the dried flakes of blood out of his hair one by one. "Why are you so tense?" he questioned, for the Uchiha had been as stiff as a board ever since Jiraiya started cleaning up his wound. The boy was emanating discomfort.
"I don't like to be touched," Sasuke snapped and shot the Sannin a glare.
It looks like he's back to his normal Uchiha attitude, Jiraiya thought with a smirk. "You don't like to be touched, eh? You're just like Orochimaru. He got all freaky when people got too close."
As Jiraiya took a seat across from Sasuke, a waitress came up to them and handed them menus. "Call for me when you know what you want," she said with a smile.
As she was leaving, Jiraiya let out a low whistle. "Pretty cute waitress, huh?" the white haired man commented, perverted thoughts running through his head.
"Hn," Sasuke responded, glancing around the restaurant. He noticed their waitress looking at him out of the corner of her eye and giggling. He 'hned' again.
Apparently, Jiraiya saw her too. "Heh, it looks like she has a thing for you, eh?" Jiraiya said, grinning while he nudged Sasuke. "She's only a few years older than you."
"Whatever," Sasuke replied emotionlessly.
"You're just like Orochimaru," Jiraiya observed with a frown. "The girls always liked him, but he never cared. You two don't understand the greatness of women."
"Do you know what you want to order sirs?" their waitress asked politely.
"Oh, yeah." Jiraiya glanced over the menu. "I'll have the bean jelly please and some green tea."
"Alright, what about you sir?" their waitress asked Sasuke, batting her eyelashes.
The Uchiha twitched slightly. "I'll have green tea also."
"Will that be all?" she asked, jotting their orders down.
"Aa," Sasuke replied with a nod.
"Alright, I'll be back soon!" She bowed and left.
"Aren't you going to get something to eat?" Jiraiya asked, not really out of concern. When Sasuke shook his head Jiraiya sighed. "So your looks have finally gotten the better of you. You're not eating so you can stay thin as a twig."
"That's not it," Sasuke growled in irritation. "I just don't like natto and sweets."
"Just like Orochimaru. He never had a sweet tooth either." Jiraiya sighed once more. "Well why didn't you say that before we came in here?"
"You were the one who bruised my head and dragged me in here!" Sasuke snapped.
"Yeah, well I wouldn't have done that if you hadn't been whining about how it's all Itachi's fault that you're such a sucky person."
"You're blaming it on me? You're the one who was busy pointing out all my bad qualities!" Sasuke's voice was no longer calm and controlled like it usually was.
"What's your problem, Uchiha? Why are you getting so angry over a stupid matter like eating at a restaurant you don't like?"
"You don't get it!" Sasuke nearly screamed. "This place is-these seats are-"
"I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?"
Both males turned their heads to look at their waitress nervously standing with their orders.
"No, it's ok. We just had a little…disagreement," Jiraiya replied, putting on a fake smile.
"Oh, ok. Well here is your bean jelly and your green tea," she said, placing his order in front of him. "And here's your green tea…oh?"
Sasuke was gone.
"Damn it, stupid kid!" Jiraiya growled, abruptly rising to his feet.
"Is he ok?" she asked in concern.
'Oh yeah, he just doesn't like natto and sweets so he probably went to get some other food," Jiraiya lied, reassuring her.
"Really, that's weird. He's come here before though…oh wait! Now that I think about it, the other man looked similar to him but he was taller, and looked more mature. It was hard to get a good look at his face though, because the cloak and his hat covered it…"2
Jiraiya looked at her in shock. "Was the man wearing a black cloak with red clouds?"
"Yes, I think so. He also sat where your companion was previously sitting…weird..." She looked back at Jiraiya to see him holding a look of realization. "Sir, are you ok?"
So this is the place Kakashi told me about, where Itachi showed up in Konoha again…and Sasuke sat in the same seat that Itachi did…shit! "I'm sorry about wasting the food," Jiraiya apologized, slapping some money in the speechless waitress's hand and bolting out of the restaurant.
He found Sasuke standing on the small dock resting over the lake, skipping stones. Jiraiya stood a few feet behind Sasuke, nervously shuffling his feet.
"You're sending those stones pretty far," Jiraiya complimented, trying to start off on a positive note.
"What do you want?" the avenger asked coldly.
Jiraiya bit his lip to choke back a nasty come back. The only reason he was being this patient with the Uchiha was because of the touchy subject he was about to bring up.
"I…I just wanted to say that I'm…sorry…" Jiraiya couldn't believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. The great Jiraiya, one of the famous Sannin, was apologizing to an ungrateful brat? It must be the apocalypse.
Even Sasuke was surprised enough to give him his attention. "…What?"
"I didn't realize that restaurant was the restaurant that Itachi went to when he came back to Konoha that one time. I also didn't realize that the seat I sat you in was the one he sat in." Sasuke tensed and clenched his hands into fists, but said nothing. "So…I'm sorry," Jiraiya finished lamely, realizing how much pride he just lost to the brat.
An uncomfortable silence stretched between the two which seemed to last hours to Jiraiya, but was probably only a few minutes in reality.
"How is your head?" Jiraiya asked to break the silence.
"It stopped bleeding," Sasuke replied simply. After another small stretch of silence, he said, "Let's go, we have five hours left. Let's find a movie to see or something."
Jiraiya figured Sasuke meant 'It's ok, I forgive you'. "Ok," Jiraiya replied, following the Uchiha brat.
xXx
"Let's see…there's Juno," Jiraiya suggested, looking at the movies showing at 12:15 PM.
"It's about some teenager getting pregnant and having to deal with high school issues. Too dramatic, next one," Sasuke replied.
"Ok…there's also Enchanted."
"Too romantic."
"Will nothing make you happy?" Jiraiya muttered under his breath. This caused Sasuke to send an Uchiha death glare in his direction. "How about National Treasure: Book of Secrets?"
"Hm…maybe. What else?"
"Alvin and the Chipmunks?"
"It's about a bunch of singing rodents-no thanks," Sasuke said with a snort.
"Ok…how about I Am Legend?"
"Either that or National Treasure, whichever you want to see, because I honestly don't care."
"You're the one who suggested the movies," Jiraiya pointed out.
"I know, but that was just so it could take up two and a half hours of the time we had to spend together, and it requires little communication," Sasuke explained. "I've never really cared for movies or TV that much; I've only been to the theatre once before."
"That's because you've been too busy training your ass off," Jiraiya mumbled, not caring if Sasuke heard or not.
Sasuke heard, but he merely 'hned'.
"Well, if you don't care then let's see National Treasure. I feel like watching something historical," Jiraiya said as they approached the ticket booth.
"I'll pay for the tickets," Sasuke said, stepping forward. "Two adult tickets to National Treasure: Book of Secrets please."
As Sasuke paid and the man handed them their tickets, Jiriaya confronted Sasuke. "That was unusually kind of you."
"Yeah, well you paid back at the restaurant, even though we didn't even get to touch our orders, so I'll pay for this. It's only fair. I still have honor, you know," Sasuke said with a scowl.
"So you do," Jiraiya murmured with a smirk as they approached the concessions. "Do you want anything for the movie?"
"Just water," Sasuke replied.
"No soda and popcorn? Jeez, you have no movie theatre spirit," Jiraiya scolded.
"I've only been here once before, remember?" Sasuke reminded him.
"Yeah, yeah," Jiraiya said, brushing off the reply. "May I have one water, one medium coke, and a medium popcorn please?" he politely asked the employee in charge of the refreshments.
While the employee left to retrieve their order Jiraiya couldn't help but notice Sasuke's eyes flitting over everything in the theatre. "Curious, Uchiha?" Jiraiya asked with a snicker. "Curiosity killed the cat."
The avenger's cheeks reddened slightly, and he looked away with a huff. Jiraiya did a double take. Blushing like that, Sasuke actually looked like the thirteen year old kid he was, not like the mature, cold hearted boy who looked much older than his age.
"Here you go, sir. That will be $6.36 please," the employee interrupted his thoughts.
"O-oh, ok," Jiraiya stuttered slightly, fishing though his wallet. He handed the man the money, took the popcorn and coke, gave Sasuke his water, and headed towards the theatre rooms.
"Sasuke, you give the tickets to the man, my hands are full," Jiraiya said.
"Thank your sir. Please enjoy your…" the man who took the tickets from Sasuke trailed off, looking Sasuke up and down. "Hey, do you have a twin? I saw someone who looked just like you pass by a few minutes ago."
Sasuke's eyes widened and he gripped the collar of the man's shirt. "Which way did he go?" the Uchiha demanded fiercely.
"T-that way," the man stuttered, pointing to the right. "He had tickets for National Treasure, theatre 7."
Sasuke took off, and Jiraiya sighed. "Well, at least that's the theatre we got tickets for. We won't miss the movie then." The white haired Sannin grudgingly followed after the young boy with anger issues.
Sasuke burst into the theatre, eyes wildly scanning it for any trace of Itachi. He spotted a tall, dark haired man walking down the steps to the bottom row of seats.
"Itachi!" he roared, leaping at the man. "I'm going to get my rev…" the Uchiha trailed off as he realized that under his knee were bare skin and a bellybutton. There's only one man gay enough to wear belly shirts…Sasuke thought with horror.
"Sasuke, I didn't know you thought about Sai that way!" Jiraiya exclaimed in disgust as he entered the theatre.
"Shut up!" Sasuke blushed as he jumped up and took a few steps backwards to distance himself from Sai. "What the hell are you doing here Sai?"3
"This is a public theatre, Sasuke-kun," Sai replied with that annoying, fake smile of his. "May I ask what you're doing here? I've heard that you don't care for movies."
"How do you know that?" Sasuke asked icily, narrowing his eyes. "Have you been stalking me?"
"No, Naruto and Sakura told me," belly shirt man replied cheerfully.
Those two are dead! Sasuke thought viciously, playing different horrible death scenes through his mind.
"Well, since we're seeing the same movie why not sit together?" Sai suggested. "Besides, people are staring…"
It was true; all eyes in the theatre were on them. The trio was much more entertaining than the previews apparently.
"No, we're not sitting together," Sasuke deadpanned.
Sai fake-pouted. "Why not?"
"I don't like you."
"Why do you dislike me? What have I done to you?"
"I think it would be better to say why would I not dislike you. And it's because you're annoying."
"Naruto is annoying and you're friends with him," Sai complained.
"Yeah, well you're creepy."
"You're hurting my feelings…"
"Good. I don't care," Sasuke replied emotionlessly.
"Let's get seats now. The movie is starting," Jiraiya intervened.
Sasuke eagerly followed Jiraiya to the top row, hoping Sai wouldn't follow. However, Sasuke's cold attitude did nothing to deter Sai who took the seat to Sasuke's left.
"Aren't you going to do something?" Sasuke hissed, leaning towards Jiraiya.
"Hey, I don't like him either. He's like your gay clone, and I can only deal with so many Sasukes at a time. You were bad enough."
If looks could kill, Jiraiya would've been dead ten times over.
Sasuke was starting to wonder if his money was wasted on the tickets. He could barely hear or see the movie, and the one to blame was the teen sitting in the seat to his left.
"Hey Sasuke-kun, this part is really good!"
"You've said that about every scene Sai," Sasuke hissed through gritted teeth. Sai talked through the whole movie, but only to Sasuke, he never bothered Jiraiya. He also leaned over Sasuke to get to the Sannin every time he wanted popcorn, completely obscuring the Uchiha's vision and invading his personal bubble.
"Ask for the popcorn! I'll pass it to you!" Sasuke had growled.
"But I wouldn't want to trouble you Sasuke-kun," Sai had replied.
It took all of Sasuke's self restraint not to thrust a chidori in that grinning face. Sai was doing this on purpose, he knew it!
Roughly two hours and forty five minutes later the trio exited the theatre, Sai and Jiriaya chatting about the movie and Sasuke grumbling to himself.
"I have to use the restroom," Sai blurted out as they neared the men's bathroom.
"Alright, we'll wait for you here," Jiraiya replied with a fake smile as Sai entered the restroom.
"We're ditching him, right?"
"Definitely, let's go."
"Right behind you."
The two ignored the weird stares they received as they ran like hell out of the theatre and didn't stop until they were a safe distance away.
"I hate him so much it's not even funny," Sasuke panted as he leaned against the wall of a nearby building.
"We finally agree on something." Jiraiya was resting on a nearby bench.
"He was bothering me on purpose, I know it," the Uchiha hissed. "I have no clue what happened in the movie, not one scene. He wouldn't shut up and I couldn't see past his torso as he leaned over to get popcorn every five seconds."
"Back to the main subject. We have roughly two hours left. What do we do now?" Neither of them held the answer to Jiraiya's question. Until an evil grin spread on the Sannin's face, that is. "Let's play poker," the old man suggested.
"Poker?" the Uchiha questioned in slight surprise. "I thought Tsunade was the one who liked gambling."
"Correction; she's the one obsessed with gambling. I just like it."
"So where are we going to play?" Sasuke snorted when the Sannin whipped out a pack of playing cards. "You carry those around with you?"
"That's the same reaction Orochimaru gave me," Jiraiya replied, grinning as he set up the cards.
"…you have naked women on your cards…"4
"What's your point?" Jiraiya asked as if it was perfectly normal to have playing cards with nude girls on them.
"…pervert…"
"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Jiraiya waved off Sasuke's comment as he dealt the cards. "Now, let's only bet $5. I don't want you to go broke on the first game."
"Hn." Sasuke and Jiriaya slapped their money on the table and picked up their cards.
Two minutes later…
"Looks like I win," Sasuke stated as he scooped up his winnings.
"You just got lucky," Jiraiya grumbled as he gathered up the cards and shuffled. "Another game! This time let's bet $10."
Two more minutes later…
"I win again." The avenger pushed the money over to the side with the rest of his winnings. "You still think I'm just lucky?"
"Yes!" Jiraiya growled, passing out another round of cards. "You won't win this time!"
Ten games of poker later…
Jiraiya stared in silence into his empty wallet as Sasuke loaded all of his winnings into his. "Why didn't you warn me that you were a good poker player?" the Sannin questioned as he watched the Uchiha shove the over-stuffed wallet in his pocket.
"I've never played before, so I didn't know if I was good or not," Sasuke replied.
"You…you've never played before?" Jiraiya asked in amazement. "How are you so good at it then?"
Sasuke shrugged. "I don't know."
"Heh, you're just like Orochimaru. You both manage to be good at everything, even if it's your first time trying," Jiraiya said, and Sasuke swore he detected a hint of bitterness in his voice.
"So, we have approximately an hour and a half left," Sasuke started. "What do we do now?"
"Let's just walk around, we'll find something sooner or later," Jiraiya suggested.
The two unlikely companions did just that, and it didn't take very long for them to find that "something".
"Hey, Ero-sennin, Sasuke-teme, what are you two doing together?" the blonde, orange-wearing shinobi questioned, approaching the two. "Are you two on a date?" he then asked slyly.
WHACK!
"OWW!" Naruto screamed in pain, clutching the huge welt growing on his head. "What'd I do?"
"Crack a joke like that again and you're dead," Sasuke threatened.
"Jeez, you can't take a joke! What'd you hit me with anyways, a dictionary? That really hurt!"
"Good," Sasuke replied with no feeling, then proceeded to examine the thing Jiraiya had handed him to hit Naruto with. "…No wonder it hurt you so much, Naruto. This thing is filled with crap."
"Crap?" Jiraiya exclaimed with a look of hurt. "That's perfect literature!"
"Its porn," the Uchiha deadpanned. "It probably has more pictures than writing."
"Porn? You mean Ero-sennin's books?" Naruto asked, jumping to his feet from the fetal position he'd been in. "You hit me with that tiny thing? Man, how heavy is it?"
"That's enough!" Jiraiya snatched back his precious publication and hid it in his robes. "You two are too young to appreciate fine literature like this."
"So to adults, fine literature is porn?" Naruto looked in disbelief at the Sannin.
"Let's forget about the book already!"
"Fine, fine, you don't need to get so defensive!"
"Will the two of you shut up already?" Sasuke commanded in annoyance.
The two bickering shinobi quieted down.
"So, why are you two hanging out anyways?" Naruto broke the silence.
"Believe me, there are a million other things I'd rather be doing right now," Sasuke immediately answered, "but we're being forced to spend time together."
"What he said," Jiraiya agreed. "It's an S-ranked mission Tsunade assigned us."
"S-rank?" Naruto questioned in disbelief. "It's nowhere near difficult enough to be S-rank."
"To us it is," the raven haired boy and the white haired man answered simultaneously. "You should try it."
"…Ok, that was creepy," Naruto said. "You both said the same thing at exactly the same time."
"Hn," they both answered.
"Whoa, that's even weirder!" Naruto backed up a few steps. "Ero-sennin is turning into Sasuke-teme!"
"Hey, you copied me!" Sasuke childishly accused Jiraiya.
"Oh no, you're starting to rub off on me!" the Sannin exclaimed in horror. "We have to get this over with, quick!"
"How do you intend to speed up time?" Sasuke asked with a snort.
"Naruto!" Jiraiya exclaimed, shaking his pupil's shoulders. "What makes time go by quickly?"
"Umm I don't know, how about fishing?" the Uzumaki suggested, starting to become dizzy.
"You moron, fishing makes time seem to go by slower," Sasuke corrected.
"Ok, then how about laser tag?"
"We have laser tag?" Jiraiya asked in surprise, releasing the dazed Naruto.
"Yeah, it was built because of the increase of non-ninja teenagers, for their entertainment."
"Increase?" Sasuke and Jiraiya looked at Naruto in surprise.
"Yeah, what about it?"
"That's actually a smart word, coming out of your mouth."
"Yeah…hey!" Naruto glared at his smirking friend.
"How'd you find that out anyways?"
"I have my sources…" Naruto replied to Jiraiya's question, his eyes darting mischievously from side to side.
Sasuke and Jiraiya exchanged glances.
"Anyways, I have to be going. I have a date with Sakura-chan," Naruto gloated with a wink.
"A date with Sakura?" Sasuke asked in disbelief. "What'd you do to get her to agree?"
Naruto's happiness deflated a little. "I promised her that you would take her to the movies on Friday," he grumbled.
"You WHAT?" Sasuke exclaimed, fingers itching to get a grip around the blonde's throat.
"Heh, well I have to go! See you guys!" Naruto took off, silently thanking Jiraiya for grabbing onto Sasuke's collar and restraining him from taking chase.
"So, laser tag it is," Jiraiya said, literally dragging the struggling Uchiha down the street.
xXx
"I'll pay for it this time," the raven haired avenger grumbled as they approached the counter.
"Sure," Jiraiya replied which was followed by a loud yawn. He leaned back against the counter as he scanned the building. Uh oh…Sasuke won't like this, he thought as his eyes fell on a certain group of shinobi.
"Here are your cards, sir. Enjoy the game!" the man at the laser tag counter said cheerfully.
"Thanks," Sasuke mumbled, taking the cards. No sooner had he pocketed the cards than he heard a loud squeal and had the wind knocked out of him as he doubled over the counter, skinny arms wrapped tightly around his neck.
"Ino, get off Sasuke," an annoyed voice commanded.
"Shut up, Shikamaru!" Ino snapped, sending a glare in the direction of her lazy teammate. "Sasuke-kun, fancy seeing you here!" she purred, changing her attitude completely.
"Get off me, Ino," Sasuke growled, trying to shake off the clingy girl. His efforts, however, did nothing to deter Ino. She simply snuggled her face deeper into his neck.
"Hey, we should probably sign up before the game starts," Jiraiya intervened.
Ino, who had been paying too much attention to her precious Sasuke, hadn't noticed Jiraiya. "Hey…you're Jiraiya-sama, one of the legendary Sannin!" she exclaimed in a mixture of surprise and awe.
"You just noticed that?" Shikamaru asked in annoyance.
"It didn't seem like you realized who he was either! Show some more respect!" the blonde kunoichi scolded.
"He's too lazy to be respectful," Chouji pointed out through mouthfuls of chips.
"Eh, I guess you're right," Ino agreed, releasing her death-grip on Sasuke.
"Don't expect me to thank you for saving me," Sasuke muttered to Jiraiya as the other three headed over to the computers to sign up.
"I don't know why you wanted to be saved. I would've loved to be in your position."
"…pedophile…"
"Shut up, I meant with any woman, older than her," a flustered Jiraiya retorted.
"Whatever, let's sign up."
After the five shinobi all registered their cards and entered the information, they waited at the doors to be let in and start the game.
"All people for the 3:30 game please enter the room," a voice announced over the intercom.
"That's us," Ino stated, entering the room with the others.
"Alright, how many of you have been here before?" the brown haired employee asked as the five shinobi and some other villagers crowded in the room.
Everyone but Jiraiya and Sasuke raised their hands.
"Alright, well we'll show you a video and explain the rules for those who don't know."
After a short video showing how to play the game, which Sasuke paid little attention to, the employee explained the rules.
"First off, no physical contact. Don't tackle anyone or anything like that." Sasuke stared pointedly at Ino as this rule was told. "No running, no swearing." Sasuke received a look from Jiraiya at this point. "Also, don't play if you're pregnant, have back problems, or anything like that," the employee concluded.
The other employee, a red haired woman, explained how to wear the vests and how to use the laser guns, then the boy took roll call.
"Alright," the first employee began. "I'll call the names of the people on the red team, and when I do, go stand over by Kairi," he said, gesturing towards the girl. "We'll start with UchihaIno."
Sasuke scowled at the name as Ino flirtatiously winked at him and stood over by the female employee.
"Okay, the next one is LadiesMan."
A few giggles filled the room as Jiraiya strutted over to where Ino stood, flashing a grin at every woman in the room.
After about ten more names were called the brown haired man started on the green team as the second employee took the red team into the next room.
"First on the red team, umm…ItachiIsABastard?"
Sasuke ignored the weird looks he received as he went to stand by the man.
"LazyAsACloud," was called out next. Shikamaru dragged himself over to Sasuke, ignoring the snickers from various people.
"Alright, now ChubbiesRule," the employee called out. Chouji bounced over to his friend and the Uchiha, for once not carrying a bag of chips.
After nine more people were called the employee took them into the room that the red team had preciously gone into. Poles stuck off the walls and had laser tag vests hanging off them. On the left side of the room, the poles bore no vests, so Sasuke assumed that was the red team's.
"The order we called your names is the number you are, so go pick the vest with your number on it."
Sasuke wandered over and snatched vest number one. With slight difficulty, he managed to pull it over his head and secure it around his waist, which was hard because he was too skinny and the vest hung loosely on him. Damn my high metabolism…I need to eat more.
Shikamaru and Chouji followed him with vests two and three as the instructor led them and the others out another door and into the laser tag arena.
"Alright," the male employee said for the umpteenth time, "here is the green recharge station. Come here to reboot when your life goes to zero and you can also check out your score on the screen. The red team's base is to the north and then to the left to the corner of the room, and you shoot it to get a lot of points. Also, your base is to the left of here, so when you hear the voice say 'green team, defend your base' run to it and zap whoever is attacking it," the employee finished. "Any questions?"
Everyone shook their heads and he wished them good luck and went off to meet with the other instructor.
"You're probably feeling pretty grateful that Ino's on the other team, huh? This way she won't be clinging to you the whole time," Shikamaru pointed out. "Oh wait, she'll probably just search the place and maul you when she spots you."
"I'll shoot her down if she comes within five feet of me," Sasuke growled in determination.
"Even is she loses all of her lives she'll probably still glomp you," Chouji pointed out.
"Good point," Sasuke stated. "So I'm screwed no matter what team I'm on?"
"Pretty much," Chouji and Shikamaru agreed in chorus.
"Joy," the Uchiha replied sarcastically.
"Attention, green team and red team, the game starts now!"
Sasuke quickly charged his laser gun and ran out of the recharge station with the others, excluding Shikamaru who was taking his sweet time, and Chouji who was waiting on him.
The avenger tiptoed around the corner of the wall, eyes scanning the room for any flashing red vests. He crept along the obstacles and passageways, making his way north to the red base. A rustle of clothes made him stiffen up and spin around, but instead of a laser zapping his lives away he was met with a face-full of blonde hair as Ino tackled him.
"Sasuke-kun, I found you! It was horrible that we were separated, but now we're reunited and-"
She didn't get to say anymore because multiple flashes of light later, her life dropped to zero.
"Thanks," Sasuke said simply, nodding in the direction of Shikamaru and Chouji.
They nodded back and Sasuke ran off, the screams of "Chouji, Shikamaru, you traitors! What the heck was that for?" ringing in his ears. He saw the red base up ahead and he ducked behind the wall, aiming his laser gun at the funnel on the wall. He released a flurry of shots, watching his score shoot up on the screen on his vest.
The automated words "Red team, defend your base! Base, under attack!" clearly rang out across the arena. The Uchiha heard a shuffling of feet and turned swiftly around. His opponent and he fired shot after shot at each other until both of their lives depleted at the same time.
"A draw? Well I guess it's better than losing to a brat like you," the spiky haired Sannin mumbled in disappointment.
"That wasn't a draw, your life went down a few seconds before mine did," Sasuke insisted.
"Stubborn brat," Jiraiya scolded, and was horrified when he detected a tiny bit of affection in his voice. "Whatever, I'm going to recharge."
Sasuke 'hned' as he too made his way back to his teams' recharge station.
What the hell was that back there? Jiraiya thought to himself as he held his laser gun up to charge. The number of lives and hits filled back up and he headed in the direction of the stairs. When I called him a brat, I said it with some affection, like I do with Naruto. Something must be wrong with me…
He reached the top level and snuck over to a wall that had a pattern of holes in it. Gotcha, kids… he thought evilly as he shot crazily at a group of unsuspecting teenagers on the bottom floor. They freaked out, looking wildly around to see where the shots were coming from.
Jiraiya snickered as they trudged back to the green recharge station.
BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!
"What the-" Jiraiya spun around to glare at the person who stole all his lives away.
"Hn, I believe I'm winning," Sasuke said in monotone with a smirk on his face.
BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM!
"Hahahahahahaha." Some overweight man on the red team, who looked like a forty-year-old who lived with his mom, ran away cackling insanely.
"That bastard…" Sasuke mumbled bitterly, glancing at the screen on his vest which read zero for his life.
"Lighten up, it's a game," Jiraiya teased with a smirk.
The Uchiha scowled and the two once again parted ways to their team's separate recharge stations.
"Green team, defend your base! Base, under attack!" the automated voice echoed.
With his lives and ammo newly refilled, Sasuke headed left to his base to find two girls on the red team about fifteen years old racking up points. He quickly cut off their attacks on his base by shooting at the spots on their chest and shoulders and ducking behind the wall to defend against their retaliations.
When the lights on their vests dimmed the avenger knew their lives were depleted. However, the two girls did not go to recharge. They simply advanced towards him, with grins on their faces.
"Hey, cutie," the tall blonde girl purred, clinging onto one of his arms.
"What's your number?" the other one, with short black hair, asked as she grabbed onto his other arm.
"Get off me," Sasuke groaned, sick and tired of fan girls. He tried to shake them off, but to no avail.
"Playing hard to get, that just makes us want you more!" the two chanted together.
Sasuke was about to take drastic measures when his savior came; although it wasn't who he expected.
"Get your filthy hands off my Sasuke-kun!" Yamanaka Ino practically screeched as she tackled the girls, Sasuke barely dodging out of the way in time.
"Hm, I guess annoying fan girls come to use sometimes," Sasuke muttered to himself as he quickly made his way away from the wrestling girls.
"A green team victory! Both teams please go back to your recharge stations and prepare for the next round."
As Sasuke did as the programmed voice said, the same voice announced "You are a high score player!" quietly through his vest. Heh, I bet Jiraiya wasn't a high score player!
Jiraiya listened as his vest congratulated "You are a high score player!" Heh, I bet Sasuke wasn't a high score player!
Multiple rounds later…
"I can't believe our team lost…" Sasuke grumbled as both teams exited the room and replaced the vests onto the poles. Everyone was sweating rivers.
"You're just like Orochimaru, he always became irritated when he lost at something," Jiraiya commented as he followed Sasuke into the room they first entered when they came into the building.
Sasuke opened his mouth, looking like he was about to say something, but then clamped it shut and just growled in frustration.
"Anyways, I'm starving, let's get something to eat. Laser tag really takes a lot out of you."
"Hn," Sasuke responded. "Looks like we lost Ino's team, I don't see them anywhere. Let's not eat here though, just in case."
"Good idea," Jiraiya agreed. "She might try to feed you off her own fork if she found you."
The two came across a buffet not long after leaving the building. "This place alright with you? It should take up the remaining forty five minutes we have to spend with each other."
Sasuke nodded and the two pushed open the door, a bell ringing as they entered.
"Welcome, dear customers!" a cheerful middle-aged man greeted them. "Take a seat anywhere you like and signal a waiter when you're ready to pay. Then you can gather all you can eat!"
The two shinobi followed his order and pulled up chairs at a booth in the far corner. The buffet was nearly deserted; they were the only customers there.
"Well, let's pay then go get our food," Jiraiya suggested, calling a waiter over. He paid the price for two adult meals and mumbled a 'you're welcome' as the waiter bowed and thanked him.
"Aa," Sasuke mumbled in agreement, following his older companion up to the buffet. He grabbed a tray and some plates and gathered multiple different types of food. The Uchiha raised an eyebrow in amusement as he glanced over at the Sannin's tray to find he could not even see it for it was piled so high with food.
"Why do you have so much food?" Sasuke asked as they set their trays back down at their table.
"Why do you have so little?" Jiraiya shot back as he munched on a jelly-filled bun.
"I have a normal amount. You're the one with the monstrous pile so high it hides your tray."
"Heh, touché. You're a teenage boy though; don't growing boys eat a lot?" Jiraiya questioned.
Sasuke, not able to think of a good comeback, merely shrugged and glared when Jiraiya smirked.
"You know what, Uchiha?" Jiraiya said in an as-a-matter-of-fact tone.
"What?" the avenger grunted as he sipped at his water, eyeing the Sannin warily.
"You're not so bad," Jiraiya started with a smile, but quickly added, "but I still dislike you."
Sasuke's look of surprise faded into a smirk. "Same thing to you."
For the next forty minutes they ate in silence, then when they were finished they bade farewell to their waiter after leaving a tip.
"Five minutes left," Sasuke whispered to himself as they exited the buffet, the first few stars glinting at them as they left.
"Beautiful moon out tonight, eh?" Jiraiya asked, gazing upward.
The moon was like a silver drop of dew against the night sky, blanketing everything in its mesmerizing light.
"Hn," Sasuke replied, averting his eyes from the sky.
Jiraiya sighed. "You're just like Orochimaru. He could never appreciate the beauty of things like that either."
"Stop it!" Sasuke practically screamed, spinning around to fully face Jiraiya. "I'm fed up with it, I can't take it anymore!"
"What are you-" Jiraiya started before the Uchiha cut him off.
"Do you know how annoying it is to hear someone tell you you're just like a person you hate? It wouldn't have bothered me that much if it was only once or twice, but you've been saying it all day! You're just like Orochimaru this; you're just like Orochimaru that; I hate it!
"Get it through your thick skull; I am NOT Orochimaru!"
Jiraiya, one of the three powerful Sannin, was left speechless as he watched the furious boy pant from his outburst. He felt like he'd been slapped, hard.
"It really bothered you that much?"
Surprised by the guilt in the older man's tone, Sasuke nodded hesitantly. Why does he sound like that? I thought he did it on purpose to annoy me.
"I didn't think me saying you were like Orochimaru would annoy you as much as it did. It was kind of hard not to make the comparison…I'm sorry."
The Uchiha was yet again shocked by the Sannin's behavior. "…it's ok," he finally said. "I guess I understand. I mean, the whole eight hours I was kind of thinking about how similar you were to Naruto, so…"
An uncomfortable silence stretched between them, each male reflecting on the out-of-character moment.
"It's 5:00," Jiraiya suddenly said, his watch beeping for the hour.
"Aa," Sasuke mumbled, turning around to head back to his house. "You know what, Jiraiya?"
"What?" the white haired man questioned, full attention on Sasuke. This was the first time the boy had called him by name.
"You're not so bad." Sasuke turned his head around slightly and Jiraiya noticed a small smile on the boy's face. "But I still dislike you."
Jiraiya allowed a grin of his own to grace his features. "Same thing to you." He watched the Uchiha's back fade out of sight.
"Well, it looks like those eight hours didn't go as bad as you thought they would," a female voice rang out, making Jiraiya jump.
"Jeez, don't sneak up on me like that!" the old Sannin growled, his face reddening. "How long have you been there anyways?"
"Oh, I've been following you guys around all day," Tsunade replied waving her hand like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"What? Why?"
"Well, for one, I just wanted to see what all would happen, and I was laughing my ass off half the time. Also, I wanted to make sure you guys completed your mission."
"Which was?" Jiraiya asked.
"Learning to understand each other," Tsunade reminded him. "Which you guys did. You learned what I wanted you to learn; he is not Orochimaru, as I heard him confirm."
"Yeah, but what did he have to learn?"
"Sasuke? He had to understand that you're not Naruto; similar to what you had to discover."
"Hm…hey, how much money do I get for this mission anyways?"
"None."
"What?" Jiraiya screamed in outrage. "You made me go through all that for no payment?"
"I'll buy you a drink or something, ok?"
"No, not just a drink! I want you to…"
The fifth Hokage tuned her old teammate out as she let her mind wander.
I lied to Jiraiya. I made him do this mission so that he would get at least a little closer to Sasuke, so that maybe he won't let Naruto give up on Sasuke as easily as Jiraiya did on Orochimaru. Because Sasuke will leave for power, I lied to Jiraiya about deterring him from that path. He will go to Orochimaru and Team 7 will shatter, just like our team did. History repeats itself; Team 7 has proven that so far. But Kami-sama, I hope that I'm wrong, please let me be wrong…
1 I've been wondering this. Does Sasuke live in the house he lived in with his family before the massacre or did he move to an apartment?
2 When I typed this I accidentally said fat instead of hat, so it read "…the cloak and his fat covered it." LOL
3 I'm going to pretend that Sasuke and Sai knew each other before Sasuke left.
4 I actually borrowed these cards from the movie Shanghai Knights lol.
A/N: Eh, I wasn't so sure about the ending, but I don't think it was absolutely horrible. Ugh, I want to rant a little. There's this jerk in my English class who I hate with a burning passion, and he ATE a picture I drew! I doodle this retarded little hunchback guy, and I showed it to my best friend and she was like "Wow, that's awesome you should show it to Barf-face (nickname for dude I hate) and tell him that he'll look like that in 40 years." So I went up to him and was like "Hey, I drew a picture for you! Isn't it awesome?" and he looked at it and had a really dirty look on his face then he ATE it and spit it back out! GAH! Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed it, and please review! ^_^