Paper Walls

By: Sang'gre Amihan

"…"Words

'…'Thoughts

"…"Lyrics

Chapter One: I can't make you love me

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I saw them walking at the mall hand in hand smiling at each other or at least the girl was smiling he just kept a serious expression. I was happy he found someone that can fill the empty space in his heart but... why am I feeling like this? I should be happy for them. It was my fault for letting him go…for not admitting my feelings. I know it was stupid for not admitting it to him. I want his happiness and if setting him free would make him happy I would gladly do it even if it kills me inside.

" Its show time!" my manager said cheerfully making me a little bit better. He was always there for me. He was like the older brother I never had.

I climbed up the stage and people started to gather below. The music started and I sang

Turn down the lights

Turn down the beds

Turn down these voices

Inside my head

Lay down with me

Tell me no lies

Just hold me close

Don't patronize

Don't patronize me

I looked down and stared at him in the eye before he could look away. I saw guilt in his eyes. I stared at his girlfriend and saw a ring around her finger.

'They were engaged' sullenly but didn't show any signs of it. It has been 5 years since I last saw him. Many things have changed. After he left I decided to quit the tennis club, and then to abandon those twin braids. I continued to sing.

I can't make you love me

If you don't

You can't make your heart

Feel something it won't

Here in the dark

These final hours

I will lay down my heart

And feel the power

If you don't

No you don't

Before I knew it the song was already finished. I saw him let go of her arm and walked towards me. I walked faster but I had a hard time passing through a mob of fans that were trying to get a decent picture of you or hugging you.

'I wish Tomo-chan is here' I stopped at that thought. I tried to distance myself from her because I know that she would only remind me of him but we still kept our friendship. 'What happened in the past stays in the past' I thought

I continued to walk after pushing my way to the exit when I felt someone holding my hand. I turned around and stared at his feline eyes.

"Let go!" I yelled at him but he still kept a firm grip at my hand

"Let go!" I yelled louder but instead of letting me go he pulled me into a hug.

"I'm sorry." he said softly barely audible for me to hear. I pulled away from the hug and looked at him straight in the eye

"It's alright" I said and walked away from him. A single tear fell from my eye as I continued to walk. I couldn't look back because I might cry even more if I see his face.

"I can't love him anymore" I chanted again and again inside my head but I know that I was lying to myself. I still love him. Hopefully I wish this would be the last time I would see him.

"Goodbye…" I said to myself before completely leaving him