DISCLAIMER: Don't Own The Twilight Series! Stephanie Meyer Does! I just make them do Weird and Twisted things...

A/N: This is a totally crap && random Twilight fanfiction that is about a moronic idea of Edward's that had interesting results. Please, Please don't hate me! I love Edward, I really do but i can't resist writing odd things about him! R & R. Humour.

Edward's Problem

Edward's POV

"OH MY CARLISLE!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, which was loud seeing as I am a vampire.

Alice's POV

"OH MY CARLISLE!" I screamed a moment after Edward, as I saw Edward clutching his stomach in agony.

I was getting panicky when Edward didn't immediately get up, sensing this Jasper came into the room sending waves of calm.

Jasper's POV

Sensing my darling Alice's panic I ran downstairs and sent waves of calm throughout the whole house. I didn't even notice my painfully repressed brother lying on the floor, until I heard a deep guttural growl escape his clenched teeth.

Edward's POV

"JASPER YOU WILL STOP WITH THE WAVES OF CALM IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR HEAD!" I roared while clutching my stomach.

It is rather amazing; I do believe that this is causing me similar pain to the transformation into a vampire.

Jasper's POV

I jumped back in surprise at Edward's outburst. Quite personally I liked my head and wish to keep it so I decided to drop the waves of calm and ran out of the house quickly, protecting my fabulously attractive head the entire way out.

Carlisle's POV

Edward was there writhing on the floor in agony. I knew just what was happening and I suppressed a smile.

"Edward, what have you eaten?" I asked. At that he looked up at me with remorseful and ashamed eyes.

Edward's POV

Oh No! I've been found out! It's despicable I know, but they looked so tasty. I ate them and I'd do it again! Well maybe I'm being a little bit melodramatic with the screaming and the writhing but what I'm going through is very painful!

"It looked tasty." I muttered out loud.

Carlisle's POV

I felt my eyes bulge. Did he really just say 'It looked tasty'? That is something I would expect from Emmett but never Edward! Edward is the smart and reasonable one, what could have possessed him to EAT whatever it is that he ate? Emmett was going to be here soon and if he sees him like this, he will never live it down.