Tell Me No Lies...Yeah, Because That Always Happens With The Winchesters
'Cause Girls Can Do Two Things Simultaneously
-4-
Authors Note: Once again I would like to think everyone who took the time to review, and to thank everyone how just read it and enjoyed it. I was actually kind of stunned by how many reviews this crazy little fic got, so...thanks! Again this is dedicated to Fiona cos she is just so wicked brillant.
Disclaimer: okay, so I'd just like to get it in the open now. I OWN Sam and Dean Winchester. Lil ol me. Yes, thats right. Now if you excuse me I have to go and walk them.
"Say hi to Dean." Courtney said with a grin, as they walked into the apartment.
Dean the monkey came running out into the hallway of the spacious flat.
It was a nice place, Dean was surprised, for crazy chick demon hunters they had a really nice place.
Dean had thought they were shitting him about the monkey. Those girls really owned a freaking monkey.
"Dean. Coffee." Fiona ordered, pointing her finger at the monkey. "And the good stuff, the real strong brew."
The monkey just squawked.
"Sounds kind of like a bird, doesn't he?" Courtney noted.
Both brothers nodded their heads, quite speechless.
"Don't you give me lip! I'll lock you in the basement, make you play hide-and-seek with the duckies."
Monkey Dean glared back stubbornly. "Pffftt…" Dean sputtered sticking his tongue out at them.
"Don't you give me lip Dean!" Fiona warned. "I'll take away the TV. No more of those chickies in the bunny costumes!"
Monkey Dean flipped up his finger.
"Wrong one." Courtney told him, pointing to the correct one.
He corrected himself, sticking up the correct one, grinning wildly over how terribly clever he was..
Fiona reached over to the table behaving her and grabbed the clown mask, pulling it over her face. She turned to the monkey and growled.
"Eeeek!!!!" monkey Dean cried, running away towards the kitchen.
Fiona pulled off the mask with a grin. "I love doing that."
"I think its more of a Sam." Dean drawled as he saw the mask.
Neither of the girls seemed to notice his comment, and Sam jabbed him in the side with his elbow. "Shut up."
"Damn monkey…" Fiona muttered, "Thinks he's so much smarter than me…"
"And of course he's not." Dean said.
"Damn straight." Fiona said. "So, story, or other stuff first?"
"Story." Courtney said.
Dean spoke at the same time, "Protection amulets."
"Both." Fiona said.
"you can't do both at the same time." Sam said.
"Sure I can."
"Somehow I doubt that." Dean muttered.
"I'm sure it will probably be tough for you but manage it." Courtney said, "We want a story."
"S'mores would be nice too." Fiona said.
"So, about those pendants...?" Dean was quite uneasy being in such a close proximity to Fiona. He really didn't thing she was going to forget the rabbit's foot bit quite so easily.
"Sto-ry fi-r-st." She said, the words coming out sing-songingly.
"Pendants first." Dean countered.
"Of the two of us, I'm not the one whoose got lying sticky fingers, so, we'll be doing this the Fiona way, thank you very much."
Dean glared at her. "Fine." He mumbled. "Sam?"
Sam flashed back to the conversation they'd had in the impala.
"How much am I supposed to tell them?"
"Dude, I don't know. Make something up." Dean was struggling to follow the girls in their car, terrified with the fast way that they drove that his impala was going to sustain damages.
"Yeah, because thats such a smart idea. We need their help Dean."
"So, make up a really good lie."
"Dean! C'mon this is a once in a lifetime chance. Have you heard of anyone before with pendants like they were talking about?"
"No." Dean said. "Which is my point exactly."
"I think this is what my visions were pointing to Dean. I think this could really be the way out of your deal thing."
Dean took his eyes of of the road for the first time. "Sam, c'mon you can't really think--"
"Dean!" Sam begged him, "Please, just gie this a chance okay. Its the best chance we've got right now."
"Fine." Dean sighed. "Then I guess as little as possible would be our best bet."
"I have visions." Sam said.
"Yeah, we got that part." Courtney said, grabbing a S'mores off of the tray that monkey Dean had brought them.
Dean followed suit grabbing a few, but dropped them when monkey Dean hit his hand.
"He only wants you to take one at a time. Its rude to take more." Fiona informed him. "He's very good with his manners."
"Then he's got the wrong namesake." Sam held back a laugh as Dean shot daggers at him.
"Sammy, just finish the damn story so that we can get this bitch over with."
"As I was saying, I had a vision of you two being hunted...hunting." Sam coughed trying to cover up his words. "And then here we are."
"Huh." Courtney turned to Fiona. "Is it just me or do you feel like you got the abridged cliff-notes version of the story?"
"I rather think we did." Fiona agreed, "C'mon now boys. We want the real story. What bone do you have to pick with the crossroads demon?"
Sam sighed, apparently as little as possible was going to be a lot more than he'd planned.
"We need to break a deal..." Sam began.
"Really?" Fiona said, her eyes lighting up with excitement. "This is awesome. We haven't had such a fun hunt in ages."
"Plus theirs a blizzard." Courtney added, pointing out the window. "We should make a snowman later."
Fiona grinned. "Lets get this done. I want to have a snowball fight, boys versus girls if you two aren't two chicken to take on a couple chickies."
Dean looked at them in shock and shrugged. "Sure." Why the hell not, if they survived this, he was in.
As they headed back toward the door to leave Dean noticed something frightening.
They had an arsenal. and it wasn't just a normal revenge driven arsenal, this truly looked to Dean like crazy person arsenal.
"Umm What's that?" Dean questioned, looking at a weapon that didn't look like any gun he'd ever seen.
"Oh that." Courtney pointed, "It's a blowtorch."
"What the hell do you have a blowtorch for?" Dean asked. Jeez, these girls needed a hobby.
"Arts and crafts." Fiona deadpanned, flicking a grin in his direction.
"Arts and crafts?" Dean questioned.
"You do know what arts and crafts are, right?" Fiona gave him a look of concern. "You know, knitting, painting, making things."
"Oh, yeah, just never knew a girl who used firepower in her crafts." Dean replied.
"Well, we're not like other girls." Courtney said, "Right?"
"Absolutely." Fiona agreed.
"Yeah, I kinda got that." Dean mumbled, ignoring the look that Sam was shooting his way to tell him to shut up.
"Pendants." Fiona said tossing one each to both brothers. "Don't lose it, as long as you've got it she can't even muss up your hair."
"Good." Dean grinned, "My hair looks perfect as is, I'd hate to see it ruined."
"Wasn't talking to you." Fiona said pointedly. "Your brother has very pretty hair though...it'd be a shame for it to get messed up."
"I don;t know..." Courtney said, "I think Dean's hair is quite nice."
"He doesn't have so much nice shaggy hair like Sam does."
"I have better hair than you." Sam grinned in his brothers direction.
"No you don't." Dean shot back.
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"See what you started." Courtney said, "Now we're going to listen to them argue over who has better hair for the next hour."
"No we won't." Fiona smiled, "Boys!"
They both turned to look in her and Courtney's direction.
"Dean your hair is mediocre, Sam, If I wasn't being otherwise restrained I'd like to run my hands through your hair...but both of you shut up because I have prettier hair than either one of you." Fiona said, "Now, can we please go and kill this bitch cos we have to be home by midnight or Dean thinks that hes top dog and starts to misbehave."
"Misbehave how?" Sam asked curiously, it had seemed to him like those girls had that monkey pretty well whipped.
"My favorite skirt was gone." Courtney said.
"As was my new bra." Fiona said, "Stupid monkey still won't tell me what he did with it."
"I'm telling you he sold it on e-bay." Courtney said, sounding like it was a conversation they'd had more than once.
"And I'm telling ya it isn't. Though I did find that baby windego up for auction..."
Dean thought...but no, he wasn't going to bother to ask.
The weather had gone completely sideways in the time they were inside. The snow was falling and it was so not good hunting weather. It also made for cranky people all around. Dean was not a cold weather person. He was of the personal opinion that snow was a worse evil than anything he's ever hunted. And he dared someone to get him started on how all that rock salt on the roads screwed with his baby's paint job. And the idiots on the road who came way to close to the impala for his comfort. Dean was fuming as they walked outside.
"You do know that's glare..." Courtney's voice trailed off as both Winchesters went sailing across the ice and landed very ungracefully on their asses.
"Son of a bitch!" Dean swore loudly, looking up to see both girls struggling to contain their laughter at the sight of the two of them splayed out on the ice as they were.
"I-ice." Courtney finished, losing the battle with laughter, Fiona joining in and the two of them clutching one another in a struggle to stay upright in their hysterics.
"Oh, oh..." Fiona was laughing so hard she had trouble stringing more than a couple of words at a time together. "You boys..." She grabbed her side, she was laughing so hard it hurt and the 'I'm going to shoot you in the face' look that Dean was shooting there way didn't dissuade at all, instead it made the both of them laugh even harder.
"You aren't very good...you--you really do need a rabbits foot!" She burst into peals of laughter once more and finally lost her footing, pulling Courtney down with her.
They continued to laugh and it only solidified Dean's opinion that they were crazy as hell.
"You know, you girls, aren't quite right in the head." Dean stated, being very careful to stand up as he didn't intend on getting friendly with the pavement again.
"Dean, shut up." Sam mumbled. This was getting extremely confusing, awkward, and just plain weird. and if Dean could have kept his yap shut for two minutes, he wouldn't have a massive headache from smashing his head into the pavement.
"Yeah, Dean," Fiona echoed, "Shut up."
"I hate you." Dean told her. "Really, really hate you."
"Well, fine then, why don't you just give me back my pendant." Fiona said. "We don't have to share."
"Thats right." Courtney echoed. "Sharing is nice, and you should appreciate that we are sharing with you...especially with your sticky fingers and all."
Dean was tempted just to give it back to her so they could get out of all this craziness. He was aware that he'd said once that normal was over rated but this was just a little bit too abnormal for him.
"No." Sam said, going over to give Fiona a hand up. "He's sorry, really, and very appreciative. You have to forgive him...he'd just not always very good at showing it."
Dean shot his brother a dirty look and helped Courtney up...who in turn pulled him down onto the ice, then hopped up herself.
"What was that for?" Dean howled, dammit that hurt! Pretty girls were just nothing but trouble, heaps and heaps of trouble.
"Cos you were mean." Fiona laughed, "'Ya forgot your manners Dean-O."
"Dean." He corrected with a frown.
"See," Sam said, "Not so much fun when its on the other foot."
Courtney helped him up this time, "Quit fooling around." She told him, "We're trying to hunt a demon."
That was just too much for him. She was just too much for him. How did Sam seem to miss the complete lack of sanity these girls had . These girls were complete nutters and he was pretty certain that they were dragging Sam down with them.