Summary-If I Kissed you, Would You Hit Me?
May: An obsessed Sasuke chasing our favorite blonde boy. Set in the modern day.
Sasuke: Who the hell says he's OUR boy? He's MINE!!!
May: sweatdrop, right, right.
"For fuck's sake!" 15-year-old Naruto screamed, tan hands yanking at his spiky sunshine blonde hair in a violent gesture. His azure blue eyes squinted slightly at the pain. He was dressed in a black tank top and off-white jeans, an orange belt was slung into its hoops casually. The outfit showed off his slender figure with more muscle than showed and really long legs for someone his height.
He turned away from the dead end of the rose maze his school, or academy, Icha Icha Lovey Dovey Academy, had thrown in to fill a gap in the 10-acre land they owned. The academy ranged in anything from sports to thermo-nuclear physics.
So how'd he get stuck in the maze? Well our poor blonde has a problem.
Well this problem started a while ago, kindergarten to be exact.
-Flashback no Jutsu!-
Naruto, age five, a more chibish version of his older self, dressed in an orange hoody and blue jeans, due to the chilly fall air, clung to an older boy with red hair down to his shoulders and matching, slitted eyes. The red head was dressed in a black long coat with blue jeans underneath with canvas sneakers.
"Nii-chan! Naru doesn't wanna go to school! Naru wants to stay with mommy at home! Nii-chan!" Naruto wailed clinging to his older brother's leg with an iron grip.
Kyuubi, age 11, groaned, running a hand through his hair that he'd decided to wear down today, he liked the fact it kept his ears warm.
"Naru, my adorable little brother, Mommy needs to get back to work, and Daddy's busy as well, and I need to get to class. You'll be fine, I promise!"
"Nuuuu!!!! Naru don't wanna! Don't wanna!" Naruto screamed, hopping up and down, still clinging to Kyuubi's leg. Kyuubi winced, he couldn't feel his left toes. "Naru wanna go home! Go home! Mommy!" he cried out instinctively when a pair of arms circled his waist, the shock making him loosen his grip slightly with Kyuubi hurriedly pulling his numb leg away. "Monster! Monster!" he screamed, kicking his legs roughly as the "monster" stood up, carrying him.
"There, there…" a kind-looking man with his brown hair pulled into a ponytail and a scar across his nose chided, dressed in a green t-shirt and dirty jeans. "I'm no monster, silly! My name's Iruka, and I'll be your teacher!" he chuckled when Naruto, failing to escape his grasp, stopped thrashing around and started to cry.
"W-wa-ah! N-nii-chan…mo-mon-monster…!" Naruto cried, rubbing his eyes with his fists as Kyuubi's hand soothingly patted him on the head.
Wait, no, it wasn't Kyuubi's hand…it's Iruka's?!
Naruto reflexively snapped at the fingers, growling slightly as Iruka's hand drew near his face again.
"Naruto!" Kyuubi gasped, pinching the blonde's cheek in punishment, earning a whine.
"Ow!"
"Bad! Don't bite your teachers!" Kyuubi frowned when Iruka laughed. "What?"
"Your kindergarten teacher stopped by to warn me about the fact your younger brother was coming, Kyuubi-kun." Iruka snickered "Have you forgotten how you acted your first week at school?" At Kyuubi's blank face, he continued. "Your teacher said that you sat down in a corner without even telling your parents goodbye and threw wooden blocks at the teachers when they came near you."
"Oh my god, really? I don't remember!" Kyuubi replied, rubbing his temple in thought.
"Don't think too hard!" Iruka teased, setting a sniffling Naruto on the ground "Now, we have toys if you wanna play…" he offered, smiling at Naruto.
Naruto ignored him and turned to glare at Kyuubi childishly, he opened his arms in a demanding way and snapped "I want Kyuu-Kyuu!"
"Kyuu-Kyuu?" Iruka sweatdropped, as Kyuubi sighed, sliding off his backpack, unzipping it, and taking out a large, red, stuffed fox plushie made of velvet about the same size of his little brother. He handed it to Naruto, who immediately grabbed it, and giving the plushie a firm hug he started to tell him how unfair this whole thing was.
"Naruto would fight a death match for Kyuu-Kyuu, try not to make it come to that…" Kyuubi pleaded, placing his hands together "Now I'm going to run away before he tries to latch onto me again, take care of him, will you Iruka-sensei?"
Iruka smiled, petting Kyuubi on the head "Of course, now hurry on to class."
"Ah, crap! I'm late! Thank you!" Kyuubi waved, running out the door top speed, a few other students running after him, realizing their lateness, the others mostly walked, waving bye to their siblings.
Naruto blinked, looking around "Nii-chan?" his head spun around wildly "Nii-chan?!" he panicked, clinging to Kyuu-Kyuu for dear life as he ran around, not noticing other children doing the same, while the out-numbered teachers tried to capture them.
He tripped, Kyuu-Kyuu flying out of his hands as he sprawled out onto the ground. He teared up, getting into a kneeling position, sniffling, on the verge of bawling.
Then he appeared.
Naruto blinked back tears as Kyuu-Kyuu was offered back to him by a pale boy with black hair that framed his face and was styled in an odd way in the back. Worried and curious onyx eyes stared at him, He had on a black turtleneck sweater and gray jeans. The boy nudging Kyuu-Kyuu into Naruto chest, urging him to take it, which Naruto did. He then led Naruto to one of the numerous small tables at which the children were supposed to sit at.
The brunette pushed Naruto lightly into a chair before sitting next to him and examining the blonde sharply. Naruto tensed as those dark eyes scanned his body.
"Are you hurt?" his voice was soft yet had an air of sweetness around it that Naruto liked.
Naruto blinked realizing any pain was gone and he shook his head, wiping at his eyes. He smiled waterily at the boy "Naru isn't ouchie, thank you."
"Hi Naru, my name's Uchiha Sasuke." The brunette replied, still examining the blonde, though it wasn't as oblivious.
"Ah, Naru's real name is Uzumaki Naruto, only Naru calls Naru, Naru, or Nii-chan." Naruto explained, blinking in surprise when Sasuke frowned at him.
"I can't call you Naru? Why not?" Sasuke questioned, sulking slightly.
"Only Naru or Nii-chan does." Naruto replied.
"I wanna call you Naru." Sasuke stated, looking at Naruto who giggled.
"Naru didn't say Sasuke couldn't call Naru, Naru!" Naruto giggled as Sasuke processed this before grinning.
"Okay, Naru." Sasuke replied a smile on his face.
End Flashback
Oh, the fluffiness! Well guess what, that when I met the problem, except he wasn't a problem back then. He's just been a problem since 7th grade;
Woo! Another Flashback!
12-year-old Naruto, dressed in a orange tank top and black jeans, with a green jewel necklace he'd won in a drinking contest against his grandma, stared blankly at his best friend, 13-year-old Uchiha Sasuke, dressed in a black tank top, matching low-riding cargo pants, mascara, black nail polish and fishnet, fishnet, fishnet!
"…What?" he asked slowly, staring at the brunette as though he'd grown a second head.
"I love you, Naruto." Sasuke repeated firmly, finding it easier to say the second time.
"L-love? S-Sasuke, I don't…" Naruto trailed off, what the hell were you supposed to say when you best friend says things like this?! "I really…" he bit his lips, lowering his gaze from the Uchiha's face.
Sasuke frowned 'Shit.' He pressed Naruto against the wall they usually met at. "Naruto, I've loved you since we were little, dobe…" he tilted Naruto's face up slowly "Don't say no, I need you…" he whispered, his lips brushing against Naruto's sensually.
Naruto turned his head sharply, causing Sasuke's lips to press against his cheek. He winced when Sasuke pulled back, giving him an injured look. The brunette stepped back, lowering his head till his bangs covered his flushed face. "Sorry…" he mumbled awkwardly before sprinting off.
"Sa-Sasuke!" Naruto ran off after he in vain, Sasuke had longer legs and more agility than him. "I'm sorry…" he whimpered, slowing down, hugging himself, realizing he'd just lost his one, true friend.
-Next Day-
Naruto instinctively walked over to the spot he and Sasuke usually met before and after school. He blinked in surprise when he saw the brunette there, waiting for him.
"Sasuke?!" said Uchiha's head snapped up, a smile breaking out onto his face went Naruto hugged him. "Are you okay? I'm sorry, it's just that it was so sudden. But, I really just want to be friends." The smile dimmed a bit.
Sasuke chuckled in a way that made the hair on the back of Naruto's neck stand on end. In less than a second Naruto felt his body being shoved firmly against the wall and something warm and wet being pressed against his lips, he gasped in surprise, Sasuke taking the opportunity to slide his tongue into the blonde's mouth.
Naruto jumped when he felt a knee rubbing against his crotch. 'oh my god, oh my god...' he numbly thought as Sasuke continued to press his body against his own in a way more than "buddy, buddy" way. His fingers tangled themselves into the black mesh shirt Sasuke had slid on today, said brunette gripping Naruto by the hair to tilt his head back and give him a better angle to work at. "Mmm…Mm!" Naruto yanked on Sasuke's shirt frantically. 'What the hell?!'
Sasuke separated, letting Naruto choke in air as he pleasured the blonde with little kisses up his jaw. He tugged on Naruto's earlobe with his teeth, earning a goddamn arousing whine as Naruto's breath blasted against his neck in short, quick gasps. "Dammit..." he groaned, aligning his hips against the blonde's, releasing a deep moan from their throats.
"Sas…Sas…oh no, please, not there…I…I…" Naruto pushed at Sasuke's chest uselessly.
"Naru…" Sasuke breathed heavily into the blonde's ear. "After your rejection last night I went home and my kind older brother suggested using the same method he uses to molest your brother. Operation: Weapon of Mass Molestation." He leaned back and smirked at Naruto's flushed face.
'Mental note; shoot Itachi…' Naruto stored that away in his memory. "Sasuke, you can't just force yourself on me!"
The Uchiha grinned maniacally "Can't I?"
Naruto felt his lifespan shorten by half at the look Sasuke gave him.
End Flashback
"Naru-koi!" (A/N: For those who don't know, "koi" is Japanese for a term of lover)
Naruto turned around frantically, seeing the bane of his existence standing in his only path out.
"Shit!" Naruto cursed, back up against the foliage of the rose maze.
"What's wrong? Aren't these roses romantic? We could screw around in this spot, it be really hot... then again anything with you is hot…" Sasuke purred, eyes-half liddened as he stalked towards the doomed blonde.
He was dressed in a loose, unzipped, dark blue wife beater with 'My Uke could kick your Seme's ass' embroidered on the back in black, with a black tank top underneath that. His loose, low-riding, black cargo pants rode lower, revealing a bit of pubic hair, confirming the fact that Uchihas didn't wear boxers or briefs.
"Sasuke! We have class! Let's go! I…I don't wanna be late!" Naruto stuttered as the brunette came closer and closer.
"Shush…we'll skip, then I'll carry you home like my bride." Sasuke said this with a love-struck, loony look on his face.
"Uchiha Sasuke! This is the Akatsuki Uke Anti-Rape Squad! You're hereby ordered to cease and desist your attempted rape of subject, Uzumaki Naruto!" an older boy with short red hair and brown eyes in a black dress shirt and matching slacks with a loose red tie around his neck stood up with incredible balance on the wall of roses, a black armband with a red cloud on it was slung onto his upper left arm.
"You'll never take me alive, coppers!" Sasuke shook his fist at Sasori, snatching a shrieking Naruto by the waist and hoisting him over his shoulder and turning to escape, cursing when he another "cop" with girly, long, blonde hair covering one eye and a pony-tail with only about a third of their hair actually in it. They had stormy blue eyes-not as pretty as Naruto's of course- which they used to glare at him from the pathway. He was dressed in a black tank top and a red scarf was tied around his neck and the cloud design, showing him to be a member of Akatsuki was stitched into a wristband on his right wrist, he'd opted for a red and black plaid mini-skirt over tight black jeans and red DC's with belts lay on his hips.
"Sasuke, let me go! Deidara! Sasori! Help!" Naruto shrieked, pounding on Sasuke's back.
"Sasuke, let Naruto go." Deidara ordered, crossing his arms in a lazy gesture, sighing when the brunette charged him. In a quick movement he snagged to arm holding Naruto and forced the Uchiha to drop him…KUNG-FU STYLE!
"Run." He suggested towards his fellow blonde who was already scrambling away.
"No! Naruto! You promised we'd make sweet love tonight!" Sasuke twisted in Deidara's grip. "Naruto! PLEASE HAVE MY BABIES!!!!"
Sasori jumped down, walking over to them "Uhuh, sure. Itachi said the same thing, he was a little more detailed of course…" he trailed off, remembering the long line of Shakespearian love speak the brunette have thrown at Uzumaki Kyuubi, the red-haired boy very close to puking. "Come on, lets go join your big bro in Counseling…" he muttered, helping Deidara drag the screaming brunette away.
"Naruto!!!!!!"
May: How's that for a first chapter?! Unlike Mayday! Most of the drama'll will be dumped on Sasuke and Naruto, no kitties this time guys, however Sasuke isn't the only Seme out for his Uke♥
More importantly, REVIEWS! Please review me! I'm lonely :(
Also, I got the idea for Sasuke's shirt from the Seme or Uke personality quiz on the Internet.